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Mar 5
'06
“How to accept an Oscar” starring Tom Hanks

The Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences has produced and distributed an eight-minute how-to video for Oscar nominees. Ratings have declined over the years, and they want to maintain the ceremony’s momentum and not lose bored viewers:

Every year, the Academy begs Oscar winners - mostly in vain - not to spend their allotted minute thanking their armies of anonymous agents, lawyers and accountants, or hugging and kissing so many people on their way to the stage that they run out of time to say anything.

This year, though, it has a new gimmick: an eight-minute instructional video, narrated by two-time Best Actor winner Tom Hanks, which it has distributed to each of the 150-odd nominees. A relaxed and wry-looking Hanks guides nominees through the art of handling that speech-making moment “with wit, flair, creativity - or at least with brevity”.

Entitled An Insider’s Guide: What Nominees Need To Know, the video includes clips of Oscar moments that stuck in the memory - such as Jack Palance doing one-arm push-ups, or Roberto Benigni gliding over the tops of everyone’s chairs en route to the stage - and ones that decidedly did not - such as the interminable thank-yous delivered by the crew from Lord of the Rings two years ago, which was about as interesting as a reading from the New Zealand telephone directory. Another bad example was Gwyneth Paltrow’s tsunami of tears.

They basically want people to keep it short, avoid lists, and be funny and interesting.

The most awkward Oscar acceptance I remember was Zellweger’s 2003 Best Actress speech. She came off as insecure as she thanked everyone, including the lackeys at her agency, for their help. This year, The Academy hopes to placate over-eager winners with a special section of their website where they can post thank you messages.

Here are presenters Jake Gyllenhaal and J.Lo preparing for tonight. Three more after the jump.

Pictures [via]

JLo Practicing for the OscarsJake Gyllenhaal Practicing for the Oscars
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Posted in Jake Gyllenhaal, Jennifer Lopez, Oscars, Photos, Television

Written by Celebitchy         See post for comments
Mar 5
'06
More Oscar party pictures

More pictures from those backwards-etiquette Oscar parties. These are from The Weinstein Company pre-Oscar Party in LA on 3/4.

Six more including Josh Hartnett, George Clooney and Sienna Miller after the jump. [via]

Felicity HuffmanJessica Alba
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Posted in Felicity Huffman, George Clooney, Jessica Alba, Josh Hartnett, Lisa Rinna, Oscars, Photos, Sienna Miller

Written by Celebitchy         See post for comments
Mar 5
'06
Oscar Cookies

Elenis has picture-perfect Oscar cookies with accurate illustrations of the nominated celebrities, and little boot, TV and book cookies to represent the best picture nomications. [via]

Two more after the jump.

Image hosting by Photobucket
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Posted in Oscars, Photos

Written by Celebitchy         See post for comments
Mar 5
'06
Oscar parties are boring and pretentious

The NY Times reveals the cut throat etiquette at Oscar parties, where only fresh nominated faces matter:

IF YOU’RE SOMEONE’S DATE, DON’T EXPECT TO BE INTRODUCED. No one cares about spouses, relatives and arm candy at Hollywood parties. You could be a Nobel laureate, but if you’re a plus-one during Oscar week, no one will want to meet you. And your significant other probably won’t introduce you. Don’t take it personally…

IF YOU HAVEN’T WORKED ON ONE OF THE NOMINATED FILMS, CONSIDER STAYING HOME. Being at an Oscar party without a nomination is like bleeding in an ocean surrounded by sharks. The safest course is to stay out of the water…

KNOW WHEN TO SAY WHEN… Moderation is the word. Your behavior is always being watched, by the industry and by the press.

THOU SHALL NOT PITCH.

GIVE YOUR ENTOURAGE THE NIGHT OFF.”It is truly the one night of the year where entourages are not tolerated,” said Judy Levy… For those who don’t make it into a party, rejection at the door can be painful since you are forced to do a reverse red carpet: a humiliating walk past the hundreds of publicists, television cameras and paparazzi who just witnessed your attempt to get in.

DON’T EXPECT TO MEET YOUR HOST. Although everywhere else it is considered good manners to seek out your hosts and thank them, in Hollywood the opposite is true.

If you’re lucky enough to get invited to an Oscar party, you’re meant to talk to people you know, not drink or eat, keep a low profile, and never introduce your significant other. It sounds like so much fun.

Here are Kiera, Sienna, Nicky & Paris at the Endeavor Pre-Oscar Party on 3/4/05. The Endeavor party strives to be press-free:

Endeavor agent Patrick Whitesell avoids competition by throwing the very last of the post-Oscar parties, a tightly exclusive bash in a mansion in the Hollywood Hills that begins in the wee hours and raves until dawn. Journalists aren’t welcome there, either.

Four more of Nicky and Kiera after the jump. Pictures [via]

Paris HiltonSienna Miller
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Posted in Keira Knightly, Nicky Hilton, Oscars, Paris Hilton, Photos, Sienna Miller

Written by Celebitchy         See post for comments
Mar 3
'06
NYT Oscar Predictions

The NY Times predicts the Oscar winners using the categories “Conventional Wisdom,” “Underdog,” “Wildcard,” and “Bagger.” The rating system is a bit convoluted, with the first three categories independent of the last.

Best Picture:
Conventional Wisdom: Brokeback Mountain
Underdog: Crash
Wildcard: Good Night and Good Luck
NYT Predicted Winner (Bagger): Crash

Best Actress:
Conventional Wisdom: Reese Witherspoon - Walk the Line
Underdog: Felicity Huffman - Transamerica
Wildcard: Keira Knightly - Pride and Prejudice
NYT Predicted Winner (Bagger): Reese Witherspoon - Walk the Line

Best Actor:
Conventional Wisdom: Philip Seymour Hoffman - Capote
Underdog: Heath Ledger - Brokeback Mountain
Wildcard: Terrence Howard - Hustle and Flow
NYT Predicted Winner (Bagger): Philip Seymour Hoffman - Capote

Supporting Actor:
Conventional Wisdom: George Clooney - Syriana
Underdog: Paul Giamatti - Cinderella Man
Wildcard: Jake Gyllenhaal - Brokeback Mountain
NYT Predicted Winner (Bagger): George Clooney - Syriana

Supporting Actress:
Conventional Wisdom: Rachel Weisz - The Constant Gardner
Underdog: Amy Adams - Junebug
Wildcard: Michelle Williams - Brokeback Mountain
NYT Predicted Winner (Bagger): Rachel Weisz - The Constant Gardner

See more predictions in their pop-up graphic (warning: this link will initally resize your screen, but it is easily maximized again.)

And if you missed Reese’s Oscar-worthy performance, here’s a clip from “Walk the Line” with June telling Johnny off for partying too much:

Posted in Oscars, Video

Written by Celebitchy         See post for comments
Mar 3
'06
Mariah Carey poses for swag

Here are some pictures of Mariah Carey posing at Revlon’s pre-Oscar celebrity “suite.” [via] According to Entertainment Tonight celebs are getting pre-Oscar cosmetics:

Meanwhile, in other Oscar news and on the celebrity pampering front, to calm stars’ nerves and prepare them for the big night, several “style suites” are available to help celebrities relax, refine fashion looks and stock up on key accessories.

What a creative way to explain that celebrities get stuff in exchange for free product promotion. I really hate the word “swag,” it sounds so ridiculous.

Oh and that’s Mariah’s hairstylist Kristofer Buckle. In case you haven’t heard the important news, hairstylists are the new BFs. Two more pictures after the jump.

Mariah Carey with her hairstylistMariah Carey posing
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Posted in Mariah Carey, Oscars, Photos

Written by Celebitchy         See post for comments
Mar 1
'06
Celebrity stylists hate nannies

picture of Rachel Zoe with nanny Joe Frost with the caption
The Independent reports on the cutthroat world of dressing for the Oscars, where bribes and last-minute gown changes have stylists scrambling to get clients ready in time. Not only do designers create custom-made gowns hoping to dress a fickle actress, Oscar attendees can even get paid to wear specific brands:

At the 2000 Academy Awards Hilary Swank caused an uproar at Christian Dior by swapping gowns the night before the Oscars. Instead of wearing Dior, as she had told the French couture house she would, she opted for one of Randolph Duke’s gowns following a back-room deal between Duke and one of her stylists, that involved a gift to the stylist of a $1,200 Spanish wood bed. Less than 24 hours before the 2005 Golden Globes Charlize Theron and Hilary Swank made a last-minute switch. Both abandoned the Harry Winston jewels they had already picked out when Chopard offered each actress a six-figure cheque to wear their jewellery.

Renee Zellweger avoids the drama by having an exclusive contract with designer Carolina Herrera. No wonder she always looks the same.

Stylist to Catherine Zeta Jones, Fati Parsia, reveals her bitterness over a lifetime of nicknames by deriding overweight nannies:

“Actresses have deep insecurities and it really shows when it comes down to choosing which dress,” says Parsia. “It’s difficult for a stylist because actresses will listen to anyone’s opinion. You get the agent, the publicist, the maid, the maid’s daughter, the dog, the 300lb nanny, and they’ve all got an opinion and if you’re the 300lb nanny and all you’ve ever worn is Lycra leggings and a big T-shirt… Well, it’s very infuriating. They hire you as a professional, you work for months getting the perfect dress, and all of a sudden, the nanny’s opinion is more important.”

Parsia copes with last-minute stress and nanny competition by drinking excessively and not eating:

As the final countdown approaches, Parsia says her tactic is to introduce alcohol to the scene. “At the last minute, you’ve got the family there, the publicist, the hair and make-up people, the manicurist, myself… the nanny. It gets pretty nerve-wracking. Out on the roads it’s a nightmare too. Just about every limo from all over America is shipped into LA and they are all trying to descend on the Kodak Theatre at the same time. It’s frantic. You need a glass of wine.”

By the time Parsia has waved off her clients, Parsia says she, herself, usually looks emaciated. “I don’t eat for days in the run up to the Oscars. It’s too stressful,” she says.

It’s nice to know that the Oscar attendees are being dressed by people they can relate to - neurotic, alcoholic anorexics.

(The stylist pictured above is Rachel Zoe, stylist to Lindsay Lohan and Nicole Richie. The Nanny is ABC’s Supernanny, Joe Frost.)

Posted in Fashion, Oscars

Written by Celebitchy         1 Comment »
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Recent Comments:
  • Aspen: I so agree! I want to see her do a short hair cut. It has to be chin length by now.
  • Bodhi: Aspen~ Are you familiar with Eddie Izzard’s Alcatraz show? One part of it (hilariously) mirrors what you...
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