In what could be an installment of Stupid Human Tricks: Halloween Edition, Babyshambles frontman, Pete Doherty, is looking to join the ranks of David Blaine in meaningless-stunts-for-attention, by locking himself in a coffin filled with rats for one hour at a Halloween party. Doherty has offered to “perform” the stunt on-stage if the band Dead Kids can make a partygoer cry.

The Babyshambles rocker has offered to perform the ghoulish stunt on stage for one hour at special Halloween event A Plague On Both Your Houses, where his favourite band the Dead Kids are playing - but only if they can scare at least one fan to tears during their song ‘Fear and Fluoride’.

Dead Kids’ singer Mike Title said: “We get all sorts of delinquents at our shows. It must be the name.
“Maybe he needs a bit of joy in his life and Dead Kids make you happy.” A spokesperson for the event, which takes place at a secret London location on October 31, added: “The theme of the party is the return of the plague, so undead, infected guests like Pete will fit in perfectly.”

[From FemaleFirst]

Give me a minute. I have to sit in silent admiration of that spokesperson for finding the most fitting words to describe Doherty I have heard yet. “Undead, infected guests like Pete…” Oh, nameless spokesperson, you deserve an award on this day.

David Blaine is either proud or threatened right now. On one hand he could feel flattered that someone else would take his cue and carry on the practice of doing completely mindless and nugatory stunts in the name of publicity. On the other hand, he could be calling his attorney to put a stop to it because Doherty is stealing his schtick. Either way he’s probably wishing he would have thought of it. Only he’d take breaks every ten minutes and make sure the rats were vaccinated.

Someone is undoubtedly searching for a nice coffin with a cigarette hole to have ready for Doherty.
Having never seen Pete Doherty without a cigarette in hand, I can’t imagine he could make it an hour without one. A nice, big, glass coffin, with a cigarette hole and flask pocket, so everyone can watch Pete and the rats see who can last longer in an enclosed space with the other.

The poor rats, where is PETA when you need them? I can see them now, huddled in the corner of the coffin, trying to get as far from Doherty as possible, fearing the plague that he carries. They didn’t sign up for this.

Here’s Pete Doherty performing at the Loch Lomond 2008 music festival in Ballach, Scotland on 8/2/08. Credit: BIG PICTURES/bauergriffinonline.com

It’s widely been reported that Pete Doherty wants to win back Kate Moss. Because their relationship obviously worked out so well the first time. Instead of showing up at her doorstep with a bouquet of flowers, Pete has decided to go the nontraditional – albeit just as romantic – route of having Kate’s favorite deceased cat formed into a ring. How could this possibly go wrong?

Pete Doherty is planning to have the ashes of his cat Shelley made into a diamond ring.

The singer has commissioned the piece from US company LifeGem and insiders claims Pete, 29, is planning to give the sparkler to ex Kate Moss, 34.

Shelley was her favourite pet when they dated last year, reports the Daily Star, and he’s hoping the gift will help win her back now she’s split from Jamie Hince, 39.

Kate is reported to have dumped The Kills star because he was spending too much time with bandmate Alison Mosshart.

‘Kate was upset with Jamie because he often doesn’t pick up his phone when he’s with her,’ a source tells the News Of The World.

‘Kate shouted at him that he has a closeness with her that they don’t have.’

[From NOW Magazine]

So, to sum up: Kate Moss: jealous of ex-boyfriend’s bandmate; Pete Doherty making cat Shelly into diamond ring. Essentially, everything is status quo in the lives of these two.

This is one of those stories you’d assume is a crazy internet rumor, except that because it’s Pete Doherty it is entirely possible. In fact I think the odds are much greater that Pete plans on turning Shelly into a diamond (I’m assuming that’s how it works; I’m way too afraid to look at the company’s website to find out) than him writing a love poem or something. Unless he wrote it in his own blood. To go with the blood artwork that he did. I’m not even trying to be outlandish here. Pete did do that. Hopefully he has no more pets in his possession, or I’m afraid Pete might come up with the materials for a matching pendant.

Here’s Pete looking not quite as scary as expected performing live in concert at the Royal Albert Hall in London on Saturday. Images thanks to WENN.

Celebrity photographer Mario Testino says that Kate Moss needs an image makeover, because she’s looked the same for years. Obviously, she needs to cut her hair.

The acclaimed snapper, who has photographed the British beauty throughout her modelling career, isn’t a fan of the star’s current look - insisting she needs a new hairstyle.

He says, “Kate is quite simply the icon of this generation, and probably the next.

“My favourite picture… is one of her with short hair. We all tell her to get her hair cut short again, but she just doesn’t listen.”

Contact Music

Kate does look fabulous with shorter hair, but has Mario considered the fact that the reason we’re all tired of Kate’s look is her constant presence beside scrappy looking ‘rock stars’ like Pete Doherty?

Speaking of Pete, it seems any money he made from Babyshambles has run out, and he doesn’t have another wealthy girlfriend to buy crack for him, so he’s going to try and continue his financial relationship with Kate Moss.

Pete Doherty is about to sell out his old flame Kate Moss. He’s planning an autobiography, with sections devoted to focusing on his relationship with her. He’s teaming up with author Sean Boru to write it. Sean says,

“The whole premise of the book is Pete talking about Kate Moss and the sex and drugs and rock’n'roll lifestyle they shared. I wrote to Pete when he was in jail about my experiences when I was a drug addict and we built a relationship. He knows I understand where he is coming from and this is the first book that properly details his private life with Moss - which is what everyone wants to read about.”

Hollyscoop

I highly doubt that this is going to be an accurate record of Pete’s time with Kate, since he probably can’t remember their relationship, or what he ate for breakfast this morning.

Fortunately, Kate is with a new man who truly loves her, Jamie Hince. He ordered 120 rolls of toilet paper to take to the Glastonbury festival. Like Pete Doherty, Hince is a singer in a rock band. Hopefully the comparisons end there.

Kate Moss is shown on 6/23/08 out in London and at Glastonbury on 6/27/08 with her boyfriend and a bodyguard. Thanks to WENN.

To me, nothing says romance quite like fish and chips. But I’m from the Pacific Northwest, and we have a different way of viewing the goodness of the ocean. I’m assuming that to the rest of the world, battered and fried cod doesn’t make hearts flutter. However Amy Winehouse seems to think fish and chips is pretty much the perfect meal to celebrate her first wedding anniversary. Unfortunately, it was takeout. For one. Eaten alone. I don’t need any other short sentences to prove my pathetic point here do I?

Amy Winehouse and Blake Fielder-Civil celebrated one year of wedding bliss on Sunday. Though it’s really more like a six month anniversary… since Blake’s been in jail for over half the amount of time they’ve been married. I know, stop fanning yourselves at their romance.

Troubled singer Amy Winehouse marked her first wedding anniversary to Blake Fielder-Civil with a lonely fish and chip supper after visiting her husband in prison. The couple spent their anniversary apart on Sunday after Amy chose to join troubled rocker Pete Doherty at a charity football tournament in south east London.

After missing a prison visit on Friday due to the traffic, Amy abandoned her usual scruffy clothes and dressed up in a pencil skirt and v-neck black top as she dropped by Pentonville Prison for a belated anniversary meeting. Amy usually visits Blake in a pair of high-heels, but opted for her signature ballet bumps for the afternoon trip.

The troubled singer, 24, paid tribute to her husband by placing a cushioned heart with the name Blake splashed across it in her famous beehive. After marking their first year as husband and wife in the visiting room of Pentonville in north London, Amy left the prison beaming to photographers.

She stopped off at a local fish and chip for a greasy supper-for-one, which she sadly wasn’t able to share with her husband.

[From the Daily Mail]

Nothing says love like fish grease. And from the last time I had fish and chips in London, the ratio of grease to fish was 3:2. Both the Daily Mail and People reported that Amy appeared to be in very good spirits, especially after returning from visiting Blake on Monday. He must have seen the YouTube video she made with Pete Doherty and some baby mice, asking him not to divorce her. Such a romantic gesture was bound to touch even the emptiest of hearts.

Who knew that would be so effective? I wish I could go back in time to my own parents’ divorce and have one of them talk to the other through baby rodents. I hope marriage counselors adopt this most successful tactic. Or just keep both parties on drugs, since I’m guessing that’s the real reason for most of Amy’s behavior the last few days. Happy Anniversary, Amy and Blake! May you have many more filled with baby mice and Pete Doherty’s scabby face!

Here are pics of Amy’s busy day visiting the hubby in jail and grabbing her fish and chip dinner yesterday. Images thanks to WENN.

Amy Winehouse and Pete Doherty posted a strange video under Pete’s YouTube account. They’re handling day-old baby mice, which is a definite no-no because the mother may smell a strange scent on the mice and reject them. (Compared to making your cat smoke crack it’s a minor transgression.)

In a weird angle in a blue-lit room, they hold the mice up to the camera, the tiny creatures wriggling on their dirty fingernails and hands.

Amy then uses one of the newborn mice to tell her incarcerated husband, Blake, not to divorce her:

Winehouse then picks up one of the mice, holds it up to the camera, and says (via the mouse): “This one’s got a message for Blake… Blake, please don’t divorce mummy….. she loves you ever so.”

Her partner in ‘crime’, and some say possible lover, is then heard saying, “If you do divorce her, you’ll have me to deal with.”

“Yeah, he’s right, if you divorce me, you’ll have me to deal with. I’m only a day old, but I know what love is,” says Wino, still holding the mouse.

[From Blogs.nzherald.co.nz]

Amy and Pete had another video up yesterday under his account which has since been removed. The Sun saved it for prosperity though. Pete talks in a French accent while Amy manhandles a baby mouse. She holds up a kitten and makes it wave. Both Pete and Amy look incredibly messed up.

It seems that for British philanthropists, Pete Doherty is not worthy of a donation. I can’t say I disagree.

The Babyshambles frontman was jailed for 14 weeks on 8 April (08) for “breach of time-keeping, non-compliance of his (probation) order and using different drugs”.

Stefano Passantino, the founder of British clothing company Lastseason.com, set up a fund to help the star get his life back in order after he was freed - donating all the proceeds from stripey T-shirts sold on the firm’s website.

Doherty won an early release from London’s Wormwood Scrubs Prison on Tuesday, but Passantino admits his campaign failed to get much of a response from the star’s fans.

He says, “Sales have been somewhat disappointing - we only sold six stripey tops. We had planned to do a big presentation and get a big cheque made up, but it seems pointless for a mere 17 quid and change. I wish Pete better luck selling records.”

Contact Music

Only six shirts were sold? Surely they were just people who liked the striped look, and had no interest in assisting Pete. I suspect even the most die-hard Babyshambles fan would prefer to give their money to a worthy cause, such as poverty in Africa or homeless youth, then to Kate Moss’ junkie ex-boyfriend.

To be fair, Pete did come out of jail with a certificate saying he is drug free. From the looks of it someone made it at home on their computer, but we’ll take your work for it Pete. For now.

I can’t say that he looks glowingly healthy, the way you might expect him to look if he’s been off the crack, but he looks okay. He also wandered out of prison and said “Thank you, Mrs Thatcher, for putting me in the company of the most dangerous criminals in the country.” Margaret Thatcher was, for those of you not familiar with British parliament, the British Prime Minster around the time that Pete was in school. Which is probably the reason for his confusion on who is currently the PM – the last time he was sober Thatcher probably was still in power.

The money raised from t-shirt sales has been sent to Pete’s management, where it is expected to get forwarded on to another charity.

Photos are are Pete Doherty on his first day of freedom and were taken by his manager. Via ONTD

After approximately 1,283,374,934 arrests, trips to court, and overnight stints in jail, it appears the law may finally have caught up to Pete Doherty. Pete’s been ordered to serve 14 weeks in jail for a variety of offenses, most notably for violating his probation on a plethora of previous drug charges. This is pretty remarkable given that Doherty has somehow managed to evade pretty much every reasonable form of punishment and rehabilitation for years of drug offenses.

Troubled Babyshambles frontman Pete Doherty was finally sent to jail today for breaking his probation order. He was taken from West London Magistrates’ Court and locked up for 14 weeks following a 30 minute hearing this afternoon. Doherty was jailed for ‘his breach of time keeping, non compliance of his order and using different drugs’, a spokesperson from the court confirmed.

Back in October, Judge Davinder Lachar cleared Doherty from the remainder of a drug control order but handed him his suspended jail sentence for drug and motoring offences. The 29-year-old was given a four-month custodial sentence, suspended for two years. On that occasion he handed an 18-month supervision order and a 12-month drug rehabilitation order. Lachar ordered he pay a £400 fine for an driving without insurance and a £75 fine for having no MOT certificate [similar to an emissions inspection in the US].

[From Metro]

Clearly getting clean is not a really big priority for Pete Doherty. And I wish I could say that 14 weeks in jail would probably change that, but let’s be realistic. Really, the only thing that will come of this is that the world will see you can only be arrested on various drug charges for six or seven years before you will spend several weeks in jail. So really, it will serve as quite the public deterrent. Actually what should serve as quite the public deterrent is any photo of Pete Doherty. That’s a hell of a lot scarier than jail time.

Here’s Pete and his sexiness at the Thames Magistrates Court in London on November 10, 2007. Images thanks to PR Photos.

Pete Doherty might be very talented and handsome (well, to some people he may appear that way) but the man who moved on from his drug addiction to an infatuation with pies should probably get better control of himself before he procreates.

Lola McLaughlin, 20, has been accepted into Harvard University to study law. She hasn’t told her parents about her pregnancy, I guess they’ll be reading about it in News of the World, the newspaper which bought her story.

She said: “I met Peter through mutual friends about a year ago.

He has always been overly tactile with me, kissing my neck and inviting me home with him.

“He did not know I was a virgin, and I certainly didn’t tell him. I think he just thought I was an inexperienced lover and he told me ‘purity’ was a real turn-on for him.

“He was a very laid-back lover and very gentle with me. He wasn’t into anything kinky or strenuous and that suited me down to the ground seeing as it was my first time having sex.”

Lola claims on her final night with Kate Moss’s ex a condom split.

She said: “We continued to have sex regardless as it was the last condom we had.

“But our weekend together wasn’t just about sex. We cuddled up to watch the movie Dirty Dancing together and we had many deep and meaningful conversations. It felt like Peter was my boyfriend.

“He told me he liked me because I was intelligent and straightforward as well as sweet and innocent. He said I was the opposite of Kate Moss. He led me to believe when we parted on the Sunday night, things weren’t going to end there. But they did.”

You know, it’s just occurred to me that the last thing I would ever want to know from my parents would be a detailed account of my conception. Particularly one my school friends could Google.

Pete has apparently denied the baby is his, his rep saying “Pete says he doesn’t know who this girl is.” Which could mean anything really, as I doubt Pete can recognize his own face in the mirror most mornings.

I suspect that Lola, a straight-A student who is the daughter of millionaires, is very smart at the book learning but not too street smart. Sure, Pete led her to believe that their affair would continue beyond one night, but guys will say anything to get a girl in the sack (okay, I’m generalizing., but you know what I mean). They have only had phone contact since she discovered her pregnancy in late December.

Lola also happens to be the Goddaughter of Sir Alex Ferguson, the boss of Manchester United soccer club. I guess Pete can give up his dream – if he ever had one – of playing for Man U.

Pete also has a four-year-old son with ex-girlfriend Lisa Moorish.

Picture note by Celebitchy: Doherty is shown on 12/4/07 leaving Amy Winehouse’s place, thanks to Splash News. Photo below is from News of The World. That girl looks so young!

Pete Doherty just runs from one addiction to the next. First it was cigarettes and internet porn. Then a little pot. On to some mushrooms, and the next thing you know it’s cocaine and crystal meth. Supposedly he once injected molasses and maple syrup into his veins. Didn’t do much, but it raised his blood sugar for weeks. At last check, Pete Doherty had his demons licked, and was so confident in his 283,485,384,484 attempt at recovery that he took to mentoring Amy Winehouse on the road to sobriety. I know, I laughed until I pooped too. Well it appears Pete doesn’t have all his addictions in check after all. Though he MIGHT be taking up running. Running to which dealer wasn’t mentioned in the article, so I’ll leave you to speculate.

Rock star Pete Doherty has been spotted running in Marlborough, with his former landlord Ralph Bernard. Mr. Bernard is a marathon runner and knocked on Doherty’s door and asked him to go for a run. While Doherty is reportedly out of shape, he’s found running is a good way to shed weight that he gained in rehab.

Doherty has also reportedly started doing press-ups and begun meditating to help improve his health. It has also been suggested that he may be training to run the London marathon. When questioned, a spokesperson for Doherty said, “There is some truth to this - you never know what could happen.”

However, the running may just be a way to counter his other new addiction, mince pies. He reportedly said: “It is going to be mince pies for me this Christmas. I have got a massive order on the way.”

[From This is Wiltshire]

They say you have to be really careful when you beat an addiction not to replace it with something else – especially something worse. Since I’ve been on a diet, I have never in my life wanted a cigarette so badly. I never used to mind the smell, but now I can’t be around them for fear I’ll grab one out of someone’s hand and pop it in my mouth. Yums. Apparently Pete’s struggling with the opposite problem. He’s (theoretically) working on beating the drugs, but wants to pop a pie instead. It really is a losing battle. Why don’t you ever hear about someone who just can’t stop eating carrots? Why in the world couldn’t we have problems with spinach addiction? This is one of the reasons I’m not 100% sold on the concept of evolution.

Picture note by Jaybird: Here’s Pete at the Thames Magistrates Court in London on November 10, 2007. Images thanks to PR Photos.

Well it seemed like a pretty safe bet that the combination of Amy Winehouse and Pete Doherty in the same room would either cause spontaneous combustion (probably due to all the flammable alcohol) or make the universe implode. The odds that everything would go off without a hitch seemed pretty slim, given their penchant for drama. But that’s exactly what happened. They were both reported to be well-behaved, though Winehouse seemed a little uninspired. But that’s probably attributable to a wide variety of drugs… and/or withdrawal from a wide variety of drugs. Really, the most troubling part of the evening was that Avril Lavigne won two awards. Not just because her music sucks, but because she’s such an egocentric brat that no one should give her a trophy to encourage her behavior.

Avril Lavigne rocked the MTV Europe Music Awards in Munich Thursday night, winning two of the show’s top prizes – while troubled singer Amy Winehouse surfaced for the event and offered a quiet “thanks.” Lavigne picked up the Most Addictive Track trophy for “Girlfriend,” as well as the Solo Artist of 2007 award – to which the 23-year-old screamed with delight to the packed auditorium: “I am so happy, this is an honor!”

Winehouse won the Artists’ Choice award, the only honor decided by fellow musicians. The singer, who’s appealing her recent pot charge, sheepishly accepted her award with a quiet “thanks” before walking off stage. Later in the evening Winehouse sang her classic “Back to Black,” but audience members noted the soul diva’s lack of energy.

Rapper Snoop Dogg hosted the event, appearing on stage in a selection of outfits including traditional German lederhosen and a kilt. Performers included Mika (despite suffering from strep throat), Lavigne, My Chemical Romance, Babyshambles and the Foo Fighters.

Pete Doherty happily signed autographs for the fans before the show, despite telling reporters he felt “lethargic.” But his performance later in the evening was anything but dreary. The rehabbing singer performed a crowd-pleasing rendition of “Delivery,” reuniting with his band Babyshambles. Earlier in the evening, Doherty denied any pre-show nerves, telling reporters: “It’s second nature, it’s what keeps me going really.”

[From People]

What the hell! How am I supposed to say anything snotty and/or amusing about celebrities when they all behave? Someone, for the love of God, throw a beer bottle at someone else, or just pour it over their head. This is way too tame and grown up for me. Where are Kid Rock and Tommy Lee fighting over Pamela Anderson’s boobs when you need them? I would always expect Europe to outdo America in terms of interesting awards show drama. You have the (aforementioned) two biggest unrepentant drama-loving musical druggies in the UK! Do something with it!

Picture note by Jaybird: I scoured the photo agencies for half an hour trying to find pictures of Snoop in the aforementioned lederhosen, but no luck. Something tells me they’re going to keep those pics tightly under wraps. So here’s Pete Doherty performing with his band Babyshambles at the MTV Europe Music Awards last night. Images thanks to WENN. Header image of Amy Winehouse performing last night at the awards show as well. Images thanks to Splash Photos.