Lindsay Lohan’s epically terrible film I Know Who Killed Me won a record 8 Razzies, which I’m pretty sure makes it legally the worst film of all time. That’s right, it’s so bad you actually have to invoke the law to explain how awful it is.

Starz – one of those premium movie channels (the sucky kind that makes HBO look really, really good) – must have gotten a pretty good deal on the rights to the film. Which I’m guessing means the studio is actually paying Starz to air it. Needing some kind of advertising – and sensing that the also needed to justify airing such unmitigated crap – Starz came up with a novel approach to market the film to its subscribers.

In a relatively novel approach to movie marketing, cable TV premium film channel Starz has launched a promotion for its airing of Lindsay Lohan’s box office bomb, “I Know Who Killed Me,” by urging people to tune in not because it is good, but because the movie is so bad!

… Starz’s June 14 airing of “I Know Who Killed Me,” tells of twin girls stalked by a serial killer. Lohan plays both twins. The movie not only tanked at box offices ($7.5 million U.S.), it was killed by critics (only 8 pct had good things to say, according to review aggregator rottentomatoes.com).

With its promotional tongue firmly planted in its TV cheek, Starz trumpets the bad reviews in its ad promoting the movie. “A disaster that exerts a perverse fascination,” Variety wrote in its review last year, as it appears on the Starz ad.

While promoting bad movies is rare, it is not unheard of. A few years back, Starz did the same thing for 2003’s ”Gigli,” another poorly reviewed film that tanked at box offices. It starred Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez. “It did extraordinarily well” for Starz, said the spokesman, although he did not have exact viewer figures. “More people watched on Starz than probably went to the theaters to see it.”

[From Reuters via Gossip Rocks]

Lohan was so terrible in the film that she was actually nominated for two Razzies for her acting – one for each twin she played. I’m sure what applied to Gigli will apply to I Know Who Killed Me. If 14 Starz viewers just leave the television on while they clean the house, that’ll be more people than actually sat through it in the theaters. I was going to try to watch it, just to see why it was so terrible. But then my illegal download failed, and I realized I’d been saved by some cosmic force. Though I commend any of you who try.

Here are stills from the film, courtesy of Allmoviephoto.

Life just gets better and better for Lindsay Lohan. First, a teeny, tiny part of one of the many lawsuits against her was thrown out. Then, she was sober for almost three months before she was caught publicly drinking champagne straight from the bottle. No word on if she figured out a way to mainline it – but if anyone could, it’d be Lohan. And now, as a final salute to what’s clearly been her best year ever, Lohan has been nominated for a Razzie! I would say the Razzie nom is definitely the most fitting of her many achievements this year. Lohan has given many spectacular performances in her long career – who could forget “Just My Luck,” or “Herbie Fully Loaded?” With a record like that, it’s no wonder she’s publicly proclaimed that she plans to win an Oscar. And now she’s one step further, after garnering so much negative attention for her performance in what may well be the worst movie ever – “I Know Who Killed Me.”

Lindsay Lohan landed her first nominations of the 2008 awards season Monday. But it’s probably best to leave this one off the résumé. The 21-year-old actress was recognized by the Razzies – the annual awards show recognizing the year’s “worst” films and performances – for her part in the thriller I Know Who Killed Me. In fact, she earned two nominations for a single role.

The movie – in which Lohan plays two characters, a stripper and an abducted small-town girl – led the pack with a total of nine nominations, including one for worst picture of 2007. “I Know Who Killed Me is the most fabulously brainless movie since Showgirls,” Razzie founder John Wilson told the Associated Press. “By the end of it, you still don’t know what happened. Are they twins or aren’t they? Did she imagine it? Can I please have my hour and 50 minutes back?”

[From People]

The Razzies, short for the Golden Raspberry Award Foundation, aim to award the very worst in Hollywood. Lohan will be competing for the worst actress Razzie against Jessica Alba, who’s nominated for her performances in three movies: “Awake,” Fantastic Four: Rise Of The Silver Surfer and “Good Luck Chuck.” Also nominated are all four of the actresses no one’s ever heard of from the “Bratz” movie, Elisha Cuthbert for “Captivity,” and Diane Keaton for her performance in “Because I Said So.” But Lohan’s stiffest completion is the in-house candidate: Lindsay Lohan. That’s right, she’s nominated twice for her acting in “I Know Who Killed Me,” in which she plays two characters. As big an accomplishment it is to be nominated for three separate movies, I think it’s safe to say there’s really no competition between Jessica Alba and Lindsay Lohan. The awards will be handed out on February 23rd. Though I don’t think the “handing out” is literal – I doubt many nominees show up to accept an insult.

Lindsay Lohan’s new movie is already getting a lot of attention as the most terrible 90 minutes of the year. A few random samplings of review headlines include “Lohan’s new movie one of the worst of the year” “’I Know Who Killed Me’ another low for Lohan” “Just kill me, please” “How bad is Lohan’s latest? You don’t want to `Know’” “Career killer for Lohan” and “Lohan’s bad week just got worse with release of her new film” - and I wasn’t cherry picking headlines. I can’t actually bring myself to pay $11 for anything with Lindsay Lohan, so all I can do is tell you what everyone else is saying about her film. First off, she plays two characters. Never an indication of an Oscar-worthy film (Freaky Friday anyone?). One of her characters wakes up minus a hand and a foot, insisting that she’s not an up-and-coming writer, but a stripper. Now this is sounding eerily familiar, with uncomfortable parallels to my own life.

“There’s a fresh candidate in the running for worst movie of 2007 honors. ‘I Know Who Killed Me,’ a ridiculous thriller (minus the thrills) starring the embattled Lindsay Lohan in a dual role, has all the hallmarks necessary for qualification: A nonsensical plot that grows sillier by the second, tawdry special effects, heavy-handed symbolism that’s big on electric-blue hues and mechanical performances are all culprits as far as the title’s concerned.”

[From the Hollywood Reporter]

Can anyone really say they’re that surprised Lohan’s movie stinks to high heaven? We all know the only reason she even took the role was those free pole dancing classes she got to take. In other Lohan news, it turns out she is still insurable, according to experts, but it will be a challenge. Most likely, she will have to put her salary in escrow until the end of any film she works on for the next few years.

“’I don’t think it (a problematic artist) is any more of an issue [thank it ever was],’ said Wendy Diaz, entertainment underwriting director at Fireman’s Fund Insurance Co., the leading film underwriter. ‘It’s pretty standard year to year.’

“But Diaz did say the terms for covering Lohan would likely be ‘serious at this point.’

“She said Fireman’s Fund, in such a case, would likely put in higher deductibles, or ask the star to put their salary into escrow to pay for any losses if production was disrupted.”

[From CNN]

So she’s not out of the running due to insurance – the article goes on to discuss other troubled actors, like Robert Downey Jr., who was still able to work. The biggest issue for Lohan seems to be: would anyone want to work with her? Lately it seems that everything she touches goes to hell, whether it’s films or friends. Why would a director want to work with her, considering all she has going against her at this point? I’m sure, at the very least, she’ll have to take a serious hit on her salary demands. Lindsay could also, (hopefully) be facing some serious jail time, and probable lawsuits. I wish I could end this story with one of those optimistic “hopefully now she’ll realize the error of her ways and get her life back together” sentences, but we all know that’s bull. She’s going to crash and burn, and keep doing it until she dies. I know I’m going to get angry comments for that, but considering everything that Lohan has done to herself that hasn’t made her change her behavior, do we really think even jail could straighten her out at this point?

Picture note by Celebitchy: Here are stills from the film, courtesy of Allmoviephoto. The trailer is below, and it probably doesn’t do justice to how truly awful this film must be.