I’ve actually watched the first episode of this second season of “Next Great Baker” as it was free on iTunes. Just last night I bought the second episode because it was pretty interesting and I wanted to see what happened to everyone. The show is a baking competition judged by “Cake Boss” head Buddy Valastro, who leads a panel of 13 bakers on different timed challenges. It’s similar to other ongoing competition reality shows in that a contestant is eliminated every week. (I prefer the one-off cooking competition shows on The Food Network like “Chopped” and “Cupcake Wars”.) One of the contestants this season, an Iraq war veteran named Wesley Durden, committed suicide in October after filming was completed. Instead of notifying the public when the guy died (which was well before the season started airing at the end of November) TLC decided to air all his episodes first and then put up a little “in memoriam” note after the guy was eliminated from the show! I find that shocking and tasteless. I’ve only seen the one episode, but Durden seemed like a stand up guy and I know he had fans. Here’s more:

Sergeant Wesley Durden, 28, a contestant on TLC’s baking competition “Next Great Baker,” committed suicide after production wrapped in October, according to the Jacksonville Daily News. However, TLC did not mention Durden’s death until after his elimination from “Next Great Baker” on Monday night’s episode.

The network delivered the news in a memorial note after the episode. TLC then released this statement: “TLC extends its deepest condolences to the family, friends, and colleagues of Sgt. Wesley Durden, who died Oct. 24. He will be warmly remembered by the cast and crew of Next Great Baker.”

Durden was a Iraq War veteran who had been deployed to Iraq twice. According to the Jacksonville Daily News, Durden was a cook with the 82nd Airborne. He is survived by his wife, his seven-year-old son and his two-year-old daughter.

[From Huffington Post]

I understand why they didn’t edit this guy out of the show after he died like they tried to do with “Real Housewives of Beverly Hills” following Russell Armstrong’s suicide. It would have been impossible to cut Durden’s scenes and maintain continuity. There are group baking challenges and he figured prominently in the show. Producers should at least have told the audience prior to the season airing. They could have better honored his memory that way. And/or they could have aired a brief segment in which some of the contestants got together and discussed what Durden meant to them. It just seems so callous to air all those shows and then put up a little note about his death afterwards, like a footnote. It’s like “Oh, by the way, this guy is dead now.” As for Durden’s suicide, I don’t blame the network or the show at all. Who knows what that poor guy was going through. They could have handled the announcement so much better though. I found RHOBH’s response to Armstrong’s death superficial, but at least they tried to talk about it. “Next Great Baker” didn’t even bother.

Here’s a video of Durden’s elimination. He seems so upbeat and positive about the experience. It’s so sad. He was a veteran and a father and it’s just a shame.
(This may only play for US visitors. Sorry about that!)

And here’s his cast interview.

Radar Online has an exclusive that 17 year-old precocious bride Courtney Stodden and her 51 year-old husband, Doug Hutchison, have turned down a spot on a VH1 show called “Relationship Rehab.” It’s a similar d-list famewhore version of “Celebrity Rehab,” probably because they realized they needed a spin off for all the people Dr. Drew was diagnosing as “love addicts.” A source tells Radar that they considered it, but it “wasn’t a perfect fit for the kind of show they wanted to do.” Read: it wasn’t enough money, and the show wasn’t focused solely on them and whatever warped story they wanted to tell involving lucite glitter stripper heels, uncomfortably explicit alliterative sexual innuendos, and statutory rape.

Courtney, 17, and her 51-year-old husband Doug Hutchison were offered a spot on Relationship Rehab, a show being produced by Celebrity Rehab’s John Irwin. It will follow couples living together in a Los Angeles home who would get counseling by world renowned therapists and participate in therapeutic activities and planned events.

“Though Doug and Courtney considered the offer, in the end they felt that this wasn’t a perfect fit for the kind of show they wanted to do,” a source told RadarOnline.com.

“There has been a lot of speculation about their marriage and a lot of people are just waiting for the inevitable ‘train wreck’ to happen, but Doug and Courtney have an incredibly strong relationship and seem very happy together,” the source said.

“So doing a show about going into ‘rehab’ just doesn’t make sense for them.”

RadarOnline.com has learned that Courtney and Doug were offered between $150,000 and $200,000 to appear on the eight-episode series that would have been filmed over three weeks. “By turning down Relationship Rehab Doug and Courtney walked away from a nice chuck of change,” the insider said.

Courtney’s mom-ager Krista Stodden told RadarOnline.com why the famed couple made the decision to turn down the show. “Doug and Courtney are faced with an array of career opportunities and offers each and every day. I’m impressed by their ability to stay true to their convictions and stand behind any decision to respectfully pass on projects that they may feel are not completely right for them.”

These two and Courtney’s creepy ass momager have their eyes on the prize. They probably think they can have a reality career like the Kardashians along with a whole media empire. In their minds, $150k is chump change and will damage the “classy,” “beautiful,” “old Hollywood” brand they’re trying to project. It takes some real delusional famehos to get here, but they’re not going to take it to the next level. They’re Salahis, not Kardashians. Courtney is going to fall on her fat-lipped face. Probably literally, given how small her stripper heels are for her feet.

That cringe-inducing show that TLC barely needed to promote, Virgin Diaries, aired last night. We were previously treated to a trailer in which we saw two of the stars share an awkward first kiss at their wedding. It looked like they were trying to eat each other’s faces off astheir family members were watching in embarrassed disbelief. In another clip (above), the giddy virgin couple describe how they’re going to prepare for sex by taking showers and literally disrobing. It’s hard to watch and even worse to imagine. In the show that aired Sunday, we got to hear their disappointment after they did the deed. The groom describes sex as “not like the movies” and the bride says it was “painful.” This is why you need to practice first.

TLC’s Virgin Diaries may have been short on sex, but thank God it wasn’t short on awkwardness. The Dec. 4 special gave us a peek into the lives of several people who agreed to abstain from any sexual activity before marriage, and while we’d obviously never criticize them for that decision, we will say it probably wasn’t the smartest idea to broadcast their first encounters on national television.

We were first introduced to a trio of best friends — Lisa, 30, Danielle, 29, and Tamara, 30 — who were so proud of being virgins that they even liked to get together and sing about their decision. But there was something off about their little song… and I’m not just talking about the pitch. Or the harmony. Or the melody. It turns out, one of them wasn’t really a virgin! Tamara described herself as a “reclaimed” virgin, which means she has had sex — many many times, actually — but has decided to wipe her slate clean. Because that’s something you can just do.

Then there was 35-year-old Carey, the only member of the cast who did not choose to remain a virgin — though he probably should have pretended it was a choice, because that would have made his tale way less embarrassing. It was also would have been better if he didn’t immediately admit to being a virgin while on a date. Here’s a tip for Carey: “I’m not very experienced with women” is not the best pick-up line. In fact, it works… about zero percent of the time.

But my favorite couple of the evening, hands down, was Ryan and Shanna, who refused to even kiss before tying the knot. They talked about kissing many times — often while riding the seesaw and giggling like manic toddlers — but it wasn’t until their wedding day that the big kiss finally came. And, oh boy, did it come. The minister probably should have said, “You may now devour the bride,” because Ryan literally attacked Shanna’s face like a snake feasting on a defenseless woodland creature. Their families, as well as the millions of viewers at home, watched in slack-jawed horror as the deed went down. – From Hollywood Life

---

Contemplating their first night together, Shanna says: ‘I’m a little nervous. Nervous about the actual intercourse I would say. I’m scared.’

Walking hand-in-hand, they talk strategy. ‘I think that you should take a shower first, and then I’ll take a shower, and then I’ll put on my lingerie, and I’ll come into the room,’ Shanna declares.

‘And I’ll have a surprise waiting for you’ interjects Ryan with a smile.

Shanna ploughs on with her plans: ‘We’ll have our robes on, we’ll slowly take our robes off, then do foreplay, and then have sex.’

Ryan then explains that he has never kissed a girl on the lips. ‘We’ve joked about it before, “Oh I really want to kiss you right now”‘ he says, leaning close to Shanna before abruptly pulling away. ‘Oh, nope,’ he laughs…

But after losing their virginity together on their wedding night, the couple have mixed reviews about how things went.

Speaking candidly, Ryan says: ‘It was good, but not as good as I was expecting,’ adding naively: ‘It was not really like in the movies.’

Leaving no details to spare, Shannin tries to sound positive saying it was an amazing experience – but adds that she found intercourse ‘really painful’. –

[From Hollywood Life & Daily Mail]

I’ll be honest, I didn’t watch this trainwreck. I meant to tape it but I forgot. When I checked Comcast on demand I was kind of relieved that it wasn’t available as I don’t want to have to sit through it. This reminds of of a woman who was on that VH1 show “Why am I Still Single?” She was a virgin and she insisted on telling her date about it the first time they went out. She got schooled pretty quickly by the matchmaker Siggy that it was totally inappropriate to bring that up so soon. I get that some people want to save themselves for marriage and that’s admirable in theory. For some people like this, though, it seems like it becomes the most important thing about them. If you build it up that much of course sex is going to be a letdown. Would these people have gotten married if they didn’t insist on not even kissing before making it legal? Also, you can’t “reclaim” your virginity, that’s ridiculous.

Screenshot via

[From HollywoodLife Animated gif from Warming Glow

VH1 has two new video interviews with 17 year-old Courtney Stodden. In the first (above) she talks about her life with her 51 year-old husband Doug Hutchinson and how they’re trying to expose each other to the sh*ttiest pop culture of their respective generations or something. It’s not notable for what she says or the way she continues to act like she’s a cat in heat. We’ll already seen all that from her, although it’s so extreme it’s hard to look away from. It’s notable because this video is on VH1′s blog, which has some of the trashiest reality shows going and may be adding another one featuring a statutory rapist and his child bride. Courtney and Doug met with VH1 in late October about filming a reality show for them. We’ve heard for some time that they’re shopping one, and this may mean that VH1 is testing the waters. Here’s more, from VH1′s FabLife blog:

It’s taken a few months, America, but we may finally be accepting the fact that Courtney Stodden and Doug Hutchison are the real thing. I mean, why else would we see the 17-year-old aspiring starlet and her 51-year-old actor husband going to church and the mall together on Sunday? Not for the photo op, surely! Anyway, we here at TheFABlife had the chance to take a little peek into the everyday lives of this fascinating couple — not the Dr. Drew-style peek, either — when Courtney answered a few questions on camera.

First up, we wondered, with their age gap, do Courtney and Doug have the same taste in music, movies and TV shows? (Subtext: Is that, at least, like hanging out with someone’s dad?)

But Courtney said they do like some of the same things and have been introducing each other to new ones. “There’s fine lines in between what we share and what we teach each other,” she said enthusiastically. “I’ve turned him on to Maroon 5, Train and all the new awesome bands. And he’s turned me on to some of his music. We’re batting that back and forth and exploring each world.”

And like many a kid raised on Nick-at-Nite, Courtney knows her old-timey TV shows, like, erm, “I Love Lucy’s.”

“I love I Love Lucy’s, The Honeymooners, Green Acres. We love that kind of stuff,” she said. “But it’s so cute: Doug calls Maroon 5 ‘Monsoon 5.’ He’s like, ‘YEAH! Monsoon 5!’ It’s so embarrassing, but it’s darling too.”

And though the paps have caught glimpses of her walking to Starbucks and doing other mundane tasks, we asked her what a typical day in the life of Courtney Stodden is like.

“A typical day for me is crazy, let me tell you,” she began. “I get up out of bed in the sexiest outfit you’ve ever seen. My hair is done, my makeup’s done. I get up at around 12 p.m. I make my mocha. I don’t care about anything else.

“Doug is wonderful,” she added. “He picks up my coffee beans that I spill on the floor. He picks up my foundation. He picks up my feathers from my big robe that I wear. My high heels are all over. So I have a wonderful life, a wonderful husband. So, a typical day for me is, like, a princess.”

[From The Fab Life]

So her husband picks up everything she drops on the floor and cleans up after her, which is why her life is so great. We’ve heard this from these clowns in the past. Courtney was asked in a previous interview why Doug was “inspiring to her” and she said “he’s cooking for me, cleaning for me, he’s like the wife around the house.”

VH1 has yet another interview with Courtney (below), where she talks about her music career and how she wants to act. She was asked if she wants to emulate anyone’s career and she said “I want to be original, unique. And I really want to bring back the classy beautiful edge of old Hollywood. But I want my own career… The career of Courtney Stodden! Yeah!” So she represents a “classy, beautiful” edge? I agree with CDAN that she must be on something. Also, I watched the video with the sound off like he suggested and it’s true that she doesn’t stop twitching. It’s probably much more than all those mochas she’s drinking. Here’s a link to her new music, if you dare.

Photos are from 11-27-11. Credit: David Tonnessen/Pacific Coast News

It looks like the freaks are about to overrun the baby-makers on TLC. They’ve show us the hoarders, the people who eat disgusting things, the people who spend all their time finding bargains, and the ladies who didn’t know they were pregnant. Now they’re showcasing virgins who are so extreme they haven’t even kissed before their wedding. There’s nothing wrong with that in theory, and many find it laudable, but in practice they’re making it look really awkward and geeky. Check out the trailer above, where the couple only goes as far as giving each other Eskimo kisses before their wedding, and then look like they’re going to eat each other’s faces off once they’re finally able to kiss in front of witnesses. Here’s more, from Radar:

In a new TLC reality show called Virgin Diaries, real people go through the trials and tribulations of being a virgin in a sexually charged culture, sometimes with cringe inducing results.

In this sneak peek obtained by RadarOnline.com, men and women discuss the reasons why they’ve remained virgins – not by choice, for religious reasons, or just because.

For one couple who decided to wait until they were married to even kiss (just like Josh and Anna Duggar back in the day) when the minister says “you may kiss the bride” one kiss turns into a complete and rather sloppy make out session.

Check out TLC’s newest show Virgin Diaries Sunday, December 4 at 9/8c.

[From Radar]

Yeah, I don’t really know what to say about this. Somehow that lady who eats rocks makes me less uncomfortable.

Here’s a gif that sums it all up, thanks to Warming Glow:

Mothers of daughters – would you ever, in any universe, want your daughters to turn out at all like the Kardashian girls? Even with all the cash and luxury goods that go along with that, we’re talking vapid, baby-voiced, narcissistic plastic surgery victims. Maybe Khloe is a semi-decent person and Kourtney is tolerable, but Kim? I mean, even though these women were adults when they entered into this reality show, fame for fame’s sake career path, they changed into warped versions of themselves. And even if you argue that only Kim changed significantly, she’s enough of a cautionary tale about entering into show business without having any discernible talent to trade on.

Well Kate Gosselin doesn’t seem to care. She sees all the wonderful things that fame has brought her – like a new face, a married paid-for boyfriend, a huge house and lots of stuff, and she wants that for her daughters. Anything else, like an education or a normal life outside of the spotlight, would be “mediocre.” Kate has reportedly reached out to pimp mama Kris Jenner for help on “how to turn the Gosselin kids into a money-making machine” like the Kardashians. We’ve seen where that train is getting off and it’s not pretty.

Fallen reality TV star Kate Gosselin is turning to Kris Jenner to save her tanking career!

Cash-hungry Kate is hoping [Kris]… can help reinvent HER family as the next Hollywood dynasty, sources say.

“Kate has reached out to Kris hoping she’ll mentor her on how to turn the Gosselin kids into a money-making machine,” a source divulged.

“Kate wants her family to be Kardashian 2.0!…”

In a bid to rebiuld their brand, Kate is enrolling the children in singing and acting classes, and planning a move to Hollywood…

“Kate got Kris’ e-mail address and sent her a gushing note about how much she admires Kris for turning her family into international superstars,” the source divulged.

“Kate ended the note by saying, ‘I hope you can teach me some of your magic tricks.’”…

“Kate is praying this new friendship will lead to a meeting with executives at the E! network, where the Kardashian TV empire is based,” said the source.

[From The National Enquirer, print edition, December 5, 2011]

I believe this. Kate is desperate for some kind of career and she’s probably reaching out to Kris as a last ditch lifeline. Kris’ empire is crumbling though, and she’s not going to be able to help her at all. E! knows that they can’t continue to build their schedule around this family and they see the writing on the wall. The Gosselins are even older news than the Kardashians. Kate should accept her fate as a spokesperson for CouponCabin.

You remember how Kate’s new face was a minor topic last week? US Weekly speculated that Kate had a face lift, while Radar got a plastic surgeon who guessed that she’d had a new-fangled treatment involving fat transfers to the face. A Beverly Hills plastic surgeon named Ashkan Ghavami told Radar: “She will have had it injected into fat pockets in her face to get the lines filled and plump up the skin. If it’s not done precisely it can make you look slightly wide and distorted, which is what has happened to Kate.” So all of you who commented that her face looked smooshed were right. Kate just penned a very brief blog entry for CouponCabin denying that she’s had a face lift. Of course she didn’t mention anything about getting any other treatments at all.

Kate Gosselin photos credit: CouponCabin. Kris Jenner photos are from 11-7-11 credit: Josiah True/ WENN.com

I’ve made no secret of the fact that I’m not a fan of E! correspondent Giuliana Rancic. She’s superficial, she can be somewhat petty, and she has serious issues around eating and gaining weight, in that she refused to gain any even when her doctor told her it was medically necessary to realize her dream of becoming a mother.

Giuliana went public with her breast cancer diagnosis last month. Her cancer was discovered early when her doctor insisted she get a mammogram prior to her third round of IVF treatment. She underwent a double lumpectomy and was back to work at E! in about a week. In a new interview with Parade, Giuliana says that she’s happy to continue filming her reality show with her husband, and that she’s also really grateful for her job at E!. I prefaced all this with the fact that I don’t really like her, because after reading this interview I’m coming around. It sounds like this major health scare has changed her outlook:

On the feedback she received after revealing her breast cancer diagnosis.
“When I went public, I thought, ‘OK, I guess a couple of people are going to talk about this,’ but I couldn’t believe it. The outpouring and the love and support was just beyond anything I could have ever imagined. I really relied on a lot of those messages I was receiving through Twitter and email and through blogs right before the surgery and the week I was recovering. I know it sounds so cliché, but I think it helped me recover quicker and it got me in better spirits. The word I kept seeing over and over again was ‘strong.’ ‘Be strong, you’re strong.’ That word has never meant so much to me as it has this past month. I owe that all to the people behind me.”

On how she’s doing post-surgery.
“I’m good. I’m hanging in there. I have good days and bad days, but so far so good. I’m very optimistic and I’m just happy to have caught it early. I think that’s really the most important thing. Early detection means so much. I want women to make sure they’re taking care of their health and being proactive.”

She also received a lot of support from E! News co-anchor Ryan Seacrest.
“He’s great. I describe our relationships as like a brother-sister relationship. We pick on each other, he probably picks on me much more than I pick on him, but it’s like a brother would. We have a great time. He’s been great to work with all these years. I love working with him.”

On showcasing her life with husband Bill Rancic (an entrepreneur who won the first season of The Apprentice) on their reality show, Giuliana and Bill.
“I guess it all started on our wedding day. The Style Network made a TV special out of the wedding and we actually got used to having the cameras around pretty quickly. People loved that special so much that the network wanted to do a reality series with us.”

She has no regrets about showing the ups and downs of their life together.
“We just felt like with every trial and tribulation we’ve put on this show, people have told us how much they learned from it and how it made them feel less alone. We thought that was a pretty incredible opportunity. The fact that we can help people through our show is an honor. We’re happy to do it and it’s something that we continue to do. We really are like open books. It’s worth it to kind of sacrifice some of my personal life to help others.”

On balancing her busy schedule.
“I think it’s just about appreciating it. Yesterday, I did nine interviews with the London Olympic athletes for E! News and then I had a two-hour meeting after work on a project I’m doing, after that I went to have a drink with my husband and spent a little quality romantic time with him, and then I went to the George Clooney premiere for The Descendants and had some romantic time with him — just kidding! And then I cruised home and spent some time with my mom, who is in town. It seems crazy and it’s a long day and it’s exhausting, but whenever I feel it’s too much, I take a step back and think this is such a great job. I’m so fortunate to have it. I have never taken it for granted. Whenever things get a little too hectic or I feel like I’m going to break down, I just think about how lucky I am. I’m not digging ditches, this is not brain surgery, this is fun and I’m very lucky to have this job.”

[From Parade]

I really like what she said at the end, when she started bitching about her schedule and then checked herself by saying she’s not digging ditches or performing brain surgery. She gained some humility and it sounds like she’s not taking her life for granted now. Of course she went on prior to that about how her reality show, for which she’s being well paid and is even taking paid product endorsements, is some kind of noble endeavor to help couples who also struggle with infertility. Giuliana and Bill even did a commercial for Merck’s “fertility lifelines,” which I’m sure she’d say she did for humanitarian purposes. Still, baby steps. I’m hoping these two realize their dream of getting pregnant soon. They’ve been through a lot together, and Bill consistently comes across as a caring, committed guy.

Giuliana and Bill are shown on 11/19/11 at “The Cotton’s 24-Hour Runway Show,” credit: Fame. They’re also shown on 11/5/11 at a book signing and lighting the Macy’s tree in Chicago. Credit: WENN.com

This is a pretty juicy story that would have gotten more mileage prior to Kim Kardashian’s precipitous downfall. Remember how Kim sort-of dated her hot Australian bodyguard late last year? (You can see photos of their on-screen hookup here) They even were shown in bed together on “Kourtney & Kim Take New York.” Well apparently the guy was married, his wife had the impression that they were still together (although they were necessarily apart at the time due to their jobs), and then he hooked up with Kim and unceremoniously dumped her. They’re also still married, and she’s still waiting for the guy to give her a divorce. Here’s the story, via Hollywood Life. Star did get the other woman to speak on the record and they have photos and everything, so this isn’t a story based on unnamed “sources.”

Kim’s romance with her Australian body guard Shengo Deane played out on her show back in 2010, but now Shengo’s wife is speaking out against the reality star.
Kim Kardashian has found herself in the middle of another love story gone wrong. Zuzana Deane is accusing Kim of stealing her husband, Shengo Deane, Star magazine reports.

Kim was introduced to Shengo in April of 2010, while he was her bodyguard in Australia. He then appeared as Kim’s love interest in a September 2010 episode of Keeping Up With The Kardashians and an October 2010 episode of Kourtney & Kim Take New York.

“In my eyes, I was happily married to Shengo when he and Kim met,” Zuzana told Star. “Less than two weeks later, he told me he didn’t want to be married to me anymore, and then he ends up in her arms in Los Angeles. It was a whirlwind. I don’t know what Shengo initially told her about his situation — he’s handsome and charming, and I can see where Kim would be smitten. But it was all a shock to me.”

But Zuzana and Shengo are still technically married. “Incredibly, Shengo still hasn’t given me a divorce, and that’s all I want from him, nothing more,” Zuzana said. “As for Kim, I actually don’t have too many hard feelings. I think she was a bit too trusting and impulsive — and Shengo saw her as the golden ticket to fame.”

[From Star via Hollywood Life]

I would say that if this guy wasn’t legally unavailable Kim would have married him, thrown a fairy tale wedding, and ditched him later. He he was too low status for her though. He was worth a fling and that’s it.

Radar is reporting that Kim is being portrayed as the “victim” to baddie Kris Humphries on the upcoming season of “Kourney & Kim Take New York.” Of course Kim has “editorial control” and is going to manipulate the footage to make it seem like Kris treated her poorly and not the other way around. Even if this is true and the guy was a total ass, she chose to marry him and that’s on her.

The E! reality darling will be seen “as the victim, and Kris will definitely be the bad guy. Kim was stunned by the amount of bad press and the public relations nightmare she has endured since deciding to file for divorce,” a source close to the situation tells RadarOnline.com. “Kim will be using the show to attempt to rehab her image. Kim has been telling her inner circle that she has worked very hard to get where she has, and she isn’t going to let her marriage and subsequent decision to divorce Kris Humprhies ruin that.

“Kim carefully and methodically plans all of her business decisions, and that is how she is looking at her divorce, as all business. Of course she is sad, but it’s all about Kim’s endorsement deals and paid promotional appearances. There were reports that Kim was going to lay low after she filed for divorce, yet several days later, she was in Atlanta shooting a role in the movie, The Marriage Counselor.

“Kim will be ringing in New Year’s Eve in Las Vegas. The fact is Kim is extremely insecure, and she is truly afraid that if she were to disappear from the public eye, for even more than a week, her fame would disappear,” the source says.

[From Radar]

Kim is right, her fame is about to disappear. She should count on it.

Meanwhile Kim is still co-starring in that Tyler Perry movie, The Marriage Counselor, as an assistant to a matchmaker. Perry defended his decision to cast Kim, writing that “I thought and still do think that it would be very responsible of her to be a part of this film. To have the young people that look up to her, see her in a film that is about what happens in life when you make the wrong choices.” Perry doesn’t seem to get that Kim has much less “young people” looking up to her at this point.

In related news, PETA is slamming Kim for wearing fox fur. They may as well do it now when she’s still somewhat relevant.

Most of these photos are from 11/2 and 11/3. Credit: WENN.com. Open mouth photo from 8/31/11. Credit: Fame

Among all the latest Kardashian stories there’s been one major theme, and that is that the general public, not just the heavy gossip consumers like us, are sick of these bitches, particularly Kim, and are ready to see them go away permanently. We’ve all been saying this for some time, but it took a while for the tide to turn and it really has. Last night’s Entertainment Tonight asked if the Kardashian empire was crumbling, and it definitely seems to be. There are several petitions to take their shows off their air, the most active of which has over 100,000 signatures and an accompanying website, BoycottKim.com. The website is an amusing parody and brief commentary on the Karadashians, although the brands to boycott section is incomplete. That’s probably because it’s nearly impossible to keep up with all the crap these people have slapped their name on.

Well advertisers are worried and wary of the Kardashians, according to ET, as is E!’s parent company, Comcast. ET claimed last night that they had a source that confirmed that “Comcast is concerned about the Kardashian franchise.” A journalist for Hollywood Reporter, Leslie Bruce, really summed things up during ET’s segment. She said “The Kardashian brand relies solely on it’s authenticity, and viewers really believing that they have a window into their life. Without that really what do the Kardashians have?”

What’s more is that the Kardashian sisters have a new book out called Dollhouse. It’s very thinly veiled fiction about their lives, with three sisters called Kamille, Kassidy, and Kyle who live in L.A. with their controlling mom and her new husband, a former professional baseball player. Their rich dad died a few years prior and now they’re hustling to keep up their luxurious lifestyle. The existence of this book just brings home how fake this family is and how much krap they’re trying to sell us without possessing any talent or a intelligence.

If you do a google news search on Kardashian, all the top results are about the petition to take them off their air. There’s also news that Kim ditched her best friend, Brittny Gastineau, shortly after she got married. Brittny’s mom told Radar that Brittny was concerned about Kim jumping into her marriage with Kris Humphries too fast. After Kim got married, she shut Brittny out. She also seems to have shut her husband out, and to have simultaneously slammed the door on all the easy money she was making. Narcissists aren’t very good at maintaining relationships after all.

Here are Kourtney and Khloe promoting their new book in New Jersey yesterday. Look at how orange Kourtney’s face is! And her pantsuit is ridiculous. Kim was a no show.

Photo credit: WENN and Fame

Of all the stories about Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries’ impending divorce and fake show wedding, this one is probably my favorite. It’s just hysterical, and I really hope it’s true. Supposedly Kris Humphries has some kind of “evidence” that Kim Kardashian uses padded panties to make her ass look big, and is threatening to expose her butt as a fraud. I’ve never really thought about padded underwear, as it wouldn’t occur to me to try and give myself a bubble butt. There are real products with silicone padding that do just that. (You learn all sorts of useless things while gossiping about celebrities.) Anyway Kris hasn’t exposed much dirt on Kim so far, probably because he’s still hoping for a decent cut of the wedding profits, but what could he say that we don’t already know about her? We already know that she’s narcissistic, superficial, useless and petty. Real evidence that she’s lying about that trademark ass that she keeps insisting is all natural would go far to discredit her, not that she’s got much credibility left at this point. Here’s more:

Kim Kardashian’s big booty is a big, fat fake, sources say – and her estranged hubby Kris Humphries is threatening to expose the truth.

The reality TV sexpot insists her bubble butt is all natural and even displayed an x-ray of what she claimed was her backside on her show to use as proof.

But some insiders claim the curvy 31-year-old beauty uses butt pads and say Kris filmed a video that proves his estranged wife’s prized posterior is phony!

Kris remarked to pals that, while he loves Kim’s shapely butt, it’s not the same as what you see on the red carpet or TV.

“Kris told his buddies that it takes a lot of work for Kim to make her bottom look as good as it does,” says a source. “He revealed all her secrets – how she uses ‘booty pads,’ Spanx and other things to enhance it. When she takes off the Spanx, the pads and everything else, it’s not the same.

“He knows what the real thing looks like – because he’s reported it on his cell phone camera!…

“Despite what Kim said on her show, I think she has definitely had fat injections in her butt,” the source said.

“Kim would never call it a Brazilian butt-lift, but that’s essentially what it was…”

Even before they split, Kris taunted [Kim] about her weight, sources say. At 5-foot-3, Kim claims to weigh 115 pounds, but Kris told pals that she’s closer to 130.

“Kris would pat Kim’s bottom and say, ‘You sure have a lot of junk in your trunk,’” divulged a close source.

“The Kris actually began calling Kim fat! He said the undersides of her arms were flabby and she was getting a pooch in her belly. Kim was furious!”

The first source added: “Kim is all about creating illusion. Having Kris spill the beans about how she really maintains her world-famous butt would be devastating to her.”

[From The National Enquirer, print edition, November 21, 2011]

Even if Kim Kardashian isn’t using those butt enhancers, (although she probably is) I do think she had a Brazilian Butt lift. (Link potentially NSFW.) The procedure involves fat transfer to the butt and wouldn’t be detectable on an x-ray like the one she did of her ass for publicity. (Like everything she does.) Oh I hope Kris is in possession of video revealing that Kim pads her ass, I really do.

A couple of days ago Kaiser reported on the story that Kris H. was refusing to sign the divorce papers and was pressuring Kim to return the actual wedding gifts, not just make a tax-deductible donation to a charity in lieu of returning gifts. That report was from Life & Style, which had Kris’ dad on the record talking about how his son was blind-sided by the divorce filing. An unnamed “source” told L&S that Kris was refusing to sign the divorce papers, and it sounded like that came from Kris’ dad too, but that he didn’t want to be blamed for leaking that news.

Well Kardashian mouthpiece E! denied that report and claimed that a source told them “It is not true that Kris is not going to sign the divorce papers…. He doesn’t want a war. He’s laying low.” You know that Kim just assumes she’s going to get her way, as usual. I hope that Kris really does hold out and that he contests the divorce and puts her through the wringer.

Meanwhile In Touch is reporting that The Kardashians are at war among themselves over this divorce, which is surely threatening their easy money stream. Supposedly Khloe and Kim got into a big blowup while they were doing publicity in Australia. In Touch claims that “The family has split into two camps since the divorce – Kim and her mom versus the rest of the family, who are really angry at her.” Evil Beet has more on this if you’re interested, but you get the point. The Kardashian’s big fake house of cards is collapsing all around them and they’re screaming and clawing while trying to hold onto what they believe is rightfully theirs. Only it’s all an illusion, down to Kim’s giant trademark ass.

These photos are from 7/10/10, and they’re the same ones The Enquirer used to illustrate this story. The pictures of Kim looking especially plastic are from 11/3/11. Credit: WENN.com