Last month Brad and Angelina were the tabloid darlings, and their relationship was declared saved after a rough patch when a guide at the Chicago Field Museum saw Angelina roll her eyes at Brad for telling Maddox to say “excuse me” when he interrupted him. (I wish I was making that up.) The skinny actors and busy parents spent a romantic night out at a hotel bar drinking and gazing into each others eyes and all their manufactured problems dissolved into perfect wedded bliss for the gaping masses.

Now they’re said to have had another night out with Angie drinking too much and Brad *gasp* telling her to stop. People even heard him say it at the restaurant where they were eating. Angie also doesn’t want to go to Brad’s parent’s house in Missouri for Thanksgiving. That means they must be on the verge of another cover-worthy breakup.

It was a typical night out for Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie. Over the course of a two-hour dinner at Sir Harry’s bar in NYC’s Waldorf-Astoria hotel on Oct. 8, Angie drank three shots of vodka, five glasses of white wine and a glass of dessert wine brought down from the couple’s suite, according to several witnesses. Though Brad also had one vodka shot and some wine, he appeared to grow concerned that Angelina didn’t know when to stop. “He looked upset,” Sir Harry’s customer Richard Parsakian tells Life & Style, “but she didn’t notice.”

When a fourth shot of vodka was placed in front of Angelina, Brad decided enough was enough. “Brad said something in her ear,” Parsakian says. “You could see she didn’t like whatever he had said to her. There was a lot of whispering between them.” Finally, says a second witness, “Brad just said, ‘No more,’ loud enough for people around to hear. Their evening just folded up after that.”

Besides her excessive drinking, Angelina has been doing other things to drive Brad away. She’s also been distancing herself from his family, telling him she doesn’t want to join his parents, Jane and William Pitt, for Thanksgiving in Springfield, Mo.

Will Brad put his foot down and insist that Angie cut back her drinking? Will Angie appease Brad by spending Thanksgiving in Missouri? Find out this and much more, all in the new issue of Life & Style!

[From Life & Style]

While Life & Style features the cover story “Angelina Turns Her Back On Brad,” which supposedly refers to the drinking and a walk she took at 3 AM in NY, US Weekly focuses on how they spend too much money, having just invested $2 million in a piece of art by controversial Banksy. The Enquirer shows Jennifer Aniston on the cover, a decision they probably made based on that recent analysis showing she sells more copies, and claims that “After 2 Years of Silence Jen Finally Tells Brad ‘I Hate You’”

Radar Online offers a funny translation of all the latest tabloid stories on Brangelina, comparing the ‘loids to bored sniping housewives talking about the rich charmed couple on the block:

“They spend money like there’s no tomorrow,” says Us, who wants you to know that she enjoys a splurge every now and then, but in moderation. “That hotel suite they’re staying in is $100,000 a month. For that kind of money they could buy a whole house in Kansas City.”

“I don’t know,” says Star, examining a chip in the “Wicked” fingernail polish she bought a few seasons back when Cosmo said dark was the rage. “I mean the hotel suite has got like six bathrooms and a gourmet kitchen, and there’s a weekly magic show for the kids. It might be kind of fun.”

“But it’s not just a hotel,” Us continues. “He spent two million for some artwork by a graffiti artist; I could have one of my kids scribble something and maybe he’d buy that. And that school where they send the little Asian boy—$18,000 a year, and for what? They move so much he was only there for a few weeks anyway. Heck, Angelina bought the baby a $450 stuffed animal from FAO Schwartz.”

“I know someone who knows someone who said that the other day Brad used the hotel’s kitchen to make Mickey Mouse-shaped pancakes for the kids and blueberry yogurt and granola for Angie,” OK! gushes—and the others ignore her.

“I’m just saying, it’s not normal the way they live. She goes for walks at three in the morning in New York City!” says Life & Style (who we sort of see wearing something from Anne Taylor and looking a lot like that neighbor who ran across the block to tell your mom that your boyfriend stayed over that weekend your parents were out of town). “And the drinking. Would you believe my friend Richard Parsakian happened to be at Sir Harry’s bar in the hotel and he saw her have nine drinks—three of them shots of vodka! If I had just one, I wouldn’t be able stand, but she had three. And Richard told me that Brad just looked at Angelina and told her that was enough, which in my opinion was probably eight drinks too late.”

[From Radar Online]

Brad visited Angelina on the set of her new Clint Eastwood film The Changeling yesterday. Next week those same tabloids are going to have to come up with a way to explain how happy they look despite their problems. I’m sure they’ll come up with a good explanation for us like they do every week.

Thanks to Splash News for these photos and popbytes for the Enquirer cover.

The British press lambasted Amy Winehouse for her performance at the Mobo awards Wednesday night in London, in which she seemed to forget the words to the song she was performing and looked a bit tipsy on stage. She soldiered on with her performance, mumbling the words to cover up what she couldn’t remember and still maintaining her composure. She also was said to have spit before accepting the award for best female.

I didn’t see the spitting incident in the video available, but her performance is on You Tube and it wasn’t awful, she just mumbled a lot. The crowd seemed to like her and really went crazy. You can tell that she couldn’t remember the words to the first song, “Tears Dry on Their Own,” but she did better with “Me and Mr. Jones,” her next performance.

Here’s the video, thanks to The Blemish for linking it. This was also in yesterday’s link post, I just didn’t get to cover this until today:

And here’s The Sun’s description of Amy’s performance shown above, which is generally accurate but seems a bit harsh. She is also said to have flipped out screaming backstage, but if that was true you think The Sun would have gone on about it forever. Two lines without much detail just make them seem guilty for making it up. Amy certainly seems capable of it, but wouldn’t they have more dirt on this incident if it really happened?

Then she took the microphone and appeared to spit before saying a brief thank-you.

She followed that with a shoddy rendition of Tears Dry On Their Own – forgetting half the words.

During the performance Amy twitched, pulled at her black-and-white dress and gripped the mic stand as she swayed precariously.

Her version of Me And Mr Jones was slightly better – at least she remembered the words. Trouble started before the show.

A source said: “In her dressing room she was really on edge, then flipped. She was screaming and chucking anything she could get her hands on at the people around her. She wasn’t in a good way.”

[From The Sun]

And she was said to have ordered a lot of booze backstage before her performance, along with some much-needed food to absorb some of it:

On the “essential” list handed to the O2 Arena were one large bottle of vodka, two bottles of Jack Daniels and two more bottles of Veuve Cliquot, not to mention two bottles of red Rioja wine and 48 of Heineken beer.

Amy gave a lacklustre performance of Tears Dry On Their Own and Me and Mrs Jones at the awards show at the O2 dome in London

Among her requests backstage were some signs that Winehouse is trying to bring a little health into her diet.

Along with the packs of Haribo sweets, chicken drumsticks, chocolate bars, chips and dips, she also requested fresh fruit - though that might have been for slices of lemon to pop in the vodka.

[From the Daily Mail]

And because she was at the Mobos, Amy couldn’t attend the Vodafone Live Awards on the same night - so she sent the owner of her local pub to go for her. She won the award for best female there too, and her representative said “We’re putting it behind the bar.”

Amy and her new husband/enabler, Blake Fielder Civil, had a huge argument before her performance, and Amy was said to be asking how much it would end up costing her if she divorced the creep.

There’s a recent picture of Amy sans makeup and beehive accepting a package through her window. She looks awful and is clearly being delivered drugs.

She might have ODed and hasn’t dumped her husband yet or cleaned up, but she’s still holding on by the thin thread of her talent. I care a lot more what happens to her than Britney Spears, Paris Hilton, or Lindsay Lohan. Winehouse is more talented than all three of them combined, but if she dies young or ruins her health even a little bit more the world will have to make due with what she’s already recorded.

Boozing butta beauty Fergie was said to be super-pissed when she saw an autographed pink tennis ball that her live-in boyfriend, Josh Duhamel, got from Russian tennis star Maria Sharapova. Josh was blabbing about how great it was to meet Sharapova at the ESPYs and said he wanted to get a display case for the pink ball.

Fergie was so steamed she threw the thing out the door.

When “Las Vegas” hunk Josh Duhamel proudly showed live-in love Fergie an autographed girly pink tennis ball he’d been gifted by sexpot Russian champ Maria Sharapova his Pop Princess went postal! As Jush gushed on… and on… and on about meeting leggy blonde Sharapova at the ESPY Awards, he idly tossed his prize in the air and mused: “You know what? I think I’ll get a special box for it!” Fuming Fergie… exploded and snarled: “I’ve got a better idea!” Snatching LoverBoy’s ball in midair, she ran to the oyer of their LA home, yanked open the front door - and flung his pretty pink playthink as hard as she could.

[From The National Enquirer, print edition, Mike Walker’s column September 3, 2007]

I could see this being true. (I’m not saying it is, because I take everything in the Enquirer with a grain of salt. They do have some exclusives that turn out to be true, but crap little stories like this you can’t ever really verify.)

How would you feel if your boyfriend/husband/significant other went on amd on about meeting someone? I know Sharapova’s a famous athlete so if my husband was elated to meet her I wouldn’t be that threatened, but Duhamel is a minor celebrity and he could easily land her. That’s got to piss off the Ferg. Everyone wonders why Duhamel has stayed with her this long, at least, you know, bitter bloggers like me who have nothing better to do but sit behind our computers and talk shit about people.

Back in February, Josh and Fergie said they keep their relationship hot by taking romantic vacations together, staying out of the spotlight, and singing karaoke. at home. Yes, karaoke. Fergie praised Josh’s version of Total Eclipse of the Heart. Maybe it is love.

Here’s Fergie after getting her hair done recently. She looks a lot better with giant bug glasses on.

This week’s National Enquirer features Brad and Angelina’s supposed custody battle for Shiloh on the cover along with an inset photo of Courteney Cox and David Arquette with the headline “Split: Courteney Cox’s marriage falls apart.” Just like the Brad and Angelina non-story, which we covered on Monday, the Courteney Cox and David Arquette split is a whole lot of speculation based on known facts about the couple.

Courteney is working on her show Dirt, and the Enquirer says that David must be pissed because she’s focusing on her career, and they haven’t had another baby yet. It’s also supposedly a big deal that they show up to events without each other. Courteney’s old admission that they sought therapy for their marriage is repeated several times, even though it’s a quote from last summer. All this speculation is done tabloid-style in the guise of nasty insider quotes. There hasn’t been one public fight, one staff member who blabbed, or any other detail to back up this story. It’s all “experts” and “insiders” saying they must be having trouble.

What’s more is that their vacation in Hawaii with Jennifer Aniston, in which they were seen kayaking with their daughter and having fun, is used as some kind of twisted evidence that they’re doomed, since Aniston and Pitt broke up right after a vacation with Cox and Arquette back in 2005.

In a recent effort to work on their relationship, they took a trip to Hawaii together - but it was hardly a second honeymoon because Courteney’s best friend Jennifer Aniston traveled with them!

Ironically, Jen and Brad Pitt announced their split just days after taking a tropical vacation with Courteney and David in 2005. And insiders don’t expect Courteney and David’s trip to work miracles for their relationship, either.

Long considered an odd couple because of their contrasting personalities - Courteney, 43, is a self-described perfectionist, and David, 35, is known for being laid-back and kooky - they were once believed to have one of Hollywood’s most loving marriages.

But sources say David and Courteney appeared to have grown apart in recent years - spending a substantial amount of time away from one another.

“They seem to be living separate lives,” said the insider.

While Courteney is hard at work on the second season of her TV series “Dirt” - and although David is involved in the production - she spends a lot of free time with the other cast members.

I think David wanted Courteney to shlow down after the first season ended, so they could work on getting pregnant with their second child, “but she went straight into pre-production for the second season,” added the insider.

“Courteney’s first child had to be conceived in vitro, so if she wants another, she has to really stop what she’s doing and focus on getting pregnant.”

[From The National Enquirer, print edition, September 3, 2007]

The article goes on to say that Courteney “must… feel like she just married a big kid who will never be as mature as her,” and that they “are hanging on right now, but it’s by a thread.”

Can you imagine being a celebrity and having to read shit like that? It’s the nastiest kind of gossip, stuff that declares your relationship is doomed based on your careers, your personalities, and the fact that you brought a friend along on a family vacation.

Reading those “insider” quotes makes me picture a bitter old housewife sitting in her 1970s kitchen wearing a housedress and smoking a cigarette. She’s bitching to her meek neighbor, who just hangs around for the lousy company, about all their other neighbors who are much happier than she is and don’t think about her much. Everyone knows her husband is cheating on her with his secretary, but she’s so busy focusing on other people that she’s oblivious.

Back in November Courteney said she wasn’t trying to have a sibling for Coco yet as she wanted to wait until she was old enough to help with the baby, but that they were considering another child. It doesn’t sound like she’s desperate for another one or anything. Maybe she should just give vague quotes to the press from now on instead of letting us know anything about her life, because it’s bound to be used to generate any type of story they want to. You can see how the celebrities flip out at the paparazzi. They get the pictures that are used for obnoxious stories like this one, and they’re always buzzing around like flies.

Header image is of Courteney and David at Il Sole back in May. Thanks to Splash News.

It sells a lot of tabloids to claim that Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are breaking up, and they seem to have broken up in the glossies at least three times this year despite the fact that they’ve only been apart for a few days here and there. This is also one of many times that Angelina has been said to have some medical problem, because it’s easy to speculate that she’s unhealthy based on how thin she is.

This week is no exception, with The Enquirer claiming that Brad and Angelina had a huge fight and that Brad wants to keep the kids once their relationship inevitably ends. The only thing substantive they seem to have to support this is the fact that Brad told Maddox to say “excuse me” when he interrupted the guide at the Chicago Field Museum, which made Angelina give Brad him a dirty look. There was also a supposed screaming match at home between the two, but to me it sounds like only that detail from the museum is true and that the screaming match was fabricated, because the details are more vague:

When the museum guide was showing the family around the exhibits, excited little Maddox… couldn’t help but butt in on the guide’s conversation,” an insider explained.

“Brad scolded Mads and told him that he needs to say: ‘Excuse me, sir,” and ‘Pardon me, sir’ before he jumps in and starts asking questions.

“Brad was trying to teach him some manners, but Angelina was giving Brad dirty looks for scolding Mads.”

[From The National Enquirer print edition, September 3, 2007]

The article goes on to say that it happened again at home the next day where Maddox interrupted them and Brad told him to say “excuse me” which resulted in a screaming match because Angelina didn’t agree on that issue. If these two break up, Brad will want to make sure that he retains custody of the children, The Enquirer claims.

My husband and I disagree about how to discipline our kid all the time, and we’re not going to break up over it. It’s hard to reach a common ground on that issue. Angelina rolling her eyes is hardly enough for a full story, so they have to say they were yelling at home over the same thing. It could be true, but I doubt it.

Meanwhile Star takes it to the next level - death - and says that Angelina is suffering from hepatitis. It seems like speculation from journalists who looked at pictures of how thin she is. Remember when The National Enquirer said back in April on the cover that she was suffering from some “Deadly Disease” and then claimed inside that it was anorexia?

Star says that “friends fear” and “doctors, who have not treated the actress, say.” That sounds to me like they’re making it up and covering their asses.

But now a source tells Star that friends and family of partner Brad Pitt fear that all these symptoms may be pointing to something far more serious than an eating disorder - they’re afraid Angie could be fighting a potentially deadly liver disease!

“Angelina has had a lot of doctor’s appointments - some she’s gone to, some she’s skipped,” a source notes. Meanwhile, adds the insider, Brad has confided to family members that the 32-year-old actress has an illness that isn’t going away, something she “will have to live with… and control with medication.”

Brad, says the source, finally “convinced Angelina to go see a doctor because he was afraid something was very wrong with her. She doesn’t have much of an appetite and is eating very little. Tests were run and Brad’s family were led to believe that her illness might be something like hepatitis, but since then he’s clammed up. I think he knows what’s wrong, but he’s keeping it from people.”

There’s no evidence that Angelina has hepatitis apart from that supposed vague statement Brad gave. They go on to quote doctors who talk about the disease. Angelina is also said to be having mood swings and fighting with Brad a lot.

In verifiable Brangelina news, the two skinny superstars helicoptered to the Hamptons this weekend to host a benefit for Brad’s Make It Right project, which builds environmentally-friendly homes for Katrina victims. I wonder if a caterer witnessed Angelina holding onto a chair for support and if that’s going to turn into another medical scare. Maybe she asked Brad to get her wrap from off her chair and that means she’s ordering him around.

When it comes to these two, I won’t believe it’s true without decent evidence. It could be partially true, but the worse their relationship and the more fragile the state of Angelina’s health, the more tabloids sell.

Angelina is shown in Central Park with Pax and Zahara on Saturday. Brad is shown at a NY park on the upper east side on Sunday with Pax and Zahara. Maddox was also there. Thanks to Splash News for these photos. The Enquirer and Star covers are our own scans.

Kirsten Dunst’s hotel room was ransacked on August 9th, according to court papers filed against the robbers today. Dunst was staying at the SoHo Grand Hotel in New York City while filming “How to Lose Friends and Alienate People.” It’s not clear how the thieves got into her room at the posh hotel, but they managed to make off with a lot of swag – most notably a $13,000 purse. I’m not one of those girls that’s all about the purses and shoes, but I’m pretty sure if someone stole much of anything worth $13,000 I’d be pretty pissed. The robbers also made off with her iPod, cell phone, two digital cameras, about $2,500 in cash, and Dunst’s identification and credit cards. Dunst had left for work early that morning when the two robbers struck.

“One suspect, Jarrod Beinerman, 33, was being held on $50,000 bond after being arraigned in a Manhattan court Wednesday on burglary and grand larceny charges. He had been arrested after going to a Brooklyn court for an unrelated case Tuesday.

“Beinerman’s lawyer told a judge that the surveillance camera showed his client wasn’t carrying anything in his hands when he left the SoHo Grand. The lawyer, James Kirschner, said Beinerman had heard a movie was being filmed at the hotel and “went there to check out what was going on.”

“Authorities have since recovered credit cards, IDs and the cell phone.”

[From the Washington Post]

In other Dunst news, it appears that she’s broken up with her boyfriend, Razorlight singer Johnny Borrell – or at least kicked him out of her house. Apparently the guy was super messy and dirty, and she couldn’t take it anymore. It started extending beyond normal sloppiness when Borrell began driving his scooter around her living room. I would think that, logically, if a guy knows you’re a neat freak and starts driving his scooter inside your home, he’s probably trying to piss you off and/or get you to break up with him.

“Actress Kirsten Dunst has reportedly asked Razorlight rocker Johnny Borrell to move out of her house because of his untidiness.

“According to the Daily Mail, the 24-year-old actress has begun to get irritated by the singer’s behaviour, which includes driving his scooter around the living room.

“A source told the paper: ‘Kirsten is incredibly tidy - she is obsessive when it comes to cleaning. Johnny is messy and it was driving her mad.’

“’Kirsten has asked him to move back into the place he shares with an old pal in nearby Muswell Hill. They are taking some time out.’”

[From RTE Entertainment]

I’m surprised she’s such a neat freak. You always see her looking like a drunken, sloppy mess, so I don’t really associate her with fastidiousness. Let’s hope the thieves didn’t steal her comb.

Picture note by JayBird: Here’s Kirsten at the Spider Man 3 Premiere. Header image of Kirsten wit Johnny Borrell at the Costume Institute Gala in May. Image thanks to PR Photos.

Usher’s publicity team has really been working overtime the last few weeks. Despite all the drama, he finally wed Tameka Foster in his lawyer’s office a week ago today. It was reported by pretty much every major news source, including the Associated Press and Reuters, that Usher’s mother, Jonetta Patton, attended the civil ceremony. This made it sound like some kind of amends had been made. Jonetta had refused to attend the planned (and then canceled) lavish Hamptons wedding on July 28th, and reports were that Usher flew to Atlanta to make amends with her right after he canceled the affair. So it seemed like all was well and good after all since the one biggest holdout finally assented. However it turns out that’s not true.

“A source close to the family confirms that Usher’s mother and former manager, Jonetta Patton, was a no-show at the ceremony, reportedly held in Usher’s lawyer’s office, and she instead chose to spend the day at a spa in Atlanta. ”As for the rest of Usher’s inner circle, ‘some people didn’t know about [the civil wedding] until a day later,’ says a source. ‘But that’s Usher and Tameka for you. One thing one day and a whole other thing the next.’

“The missing mom could add fuel to the rumor fires circulating after the R&B singer, 28, called off his lavishly planned July 28 Hamptons wedding at the last minute. Other theories for the postponement include a dust-up over wedding details, a pregnant Foster, 37, being reluctant regarding a prenup (she eventually agreed to sign one) and a strained relationship with Patton, who apparently does not get along with her new daughter-in-law.

“Possible points of contention mentioned in the media are that Foster has three children from a previous marriage as well as a 1991 conviction for auto theft. The newlyweds plan to make it up to their whiplashed friends and family by throwing a big bash in Atlanta in a few weeks.”

[From People Magazine]

I hope their PR people get an enormous raise after this whole debacle. I’m talking six figures, absolute minimum. With all the drama and confusion and double talk that went on the last few weeks (and don’t forget that story about Tameka putting a hit on her half sister), you have to give them credit for sticking with it. You just know this marriage is going to go down in a ball of flames.

It appears Rachael Ray’s marriage is pretty much over. The giant-headed star (and I mean that in the kindest, literal sense; not as an insult implying that she has a big ego) and her husband have been tabloid fodder since last November, when the National Enquirer reported that her husband, lawyer/”rock star” John Cusimano paid a lady named Jeaninne Walz a good deal of money ($500 a session) to spit on him, rub her feet in his face, and other stuff too nasty to write. According to Page Six this has been going on since 2000, and has continued throughout the course of his marriage to Ray, according to Celebrity Mound.

Cusimano is the frontman for the very appropriately named band The Cringe. He and Ray have been married for two years, and don’t have any children. Though all reps are denying the breakup, it seems to just be that heap of garbage most press reps and lawyers are paid to say.

“Rumors are also circulating that Rachael ‘has been flirting’ with Colby Donaldson, the ex-”Survivor” cast member who joined the “Rachael Ray” show in February, on and off the set. But Ray’s rep, Charlie Dougiello, told us, “Rachael and John are happier than ever and have been in the Hamptons since Tuesday enjoying the holiday week with friends. Rachael’s mom, Elsa, is upstate at the family cabin. There is no truth to reports they are about to get divorced.”

[From Page Six]

It stinks that someone can just come along and destroy your marriage by saying something like this. But you have to think that if it really is leading to a divorce, there’s at least a chance that there’s some truth to the rumor. I swear to God, just the mention of feet in any sexual context would make me end a marriage/friendship/work/pretty-much-anything.

The gossip rags have moved on from calling wan Katie Holmes a brainwashed Stepford wife to championing the changes in her after she made an appearance at Paris fashion week without Tom. I guess a new face makes all the difference.

In Touch says she’s calling the shots now, and claims she’s trying to get her career back and is taking advice from Victoria Beckham to make sure her man is under control:

Until recently, Katie has rarely been seen unless she is attached to Tom’s hip at his kid’s soccer games, on the red carpet and at charity events. After she met Tom, Katie shut out most of her old friends in order to give Tom constant attention. However, her new, close friendship with Victoria Beckham is changing everything.

The duo travelled to Paris on January 23 to attend Couture Week. Strong, confident Victoria, 32, “is helping Katie assert her power and independence,” and insider says, and - as the mother of three boys… giving her tips on how to be a working mom…

Lately, Katie seems stifled around Tom. At a party for musician Prince at the Beverly Wilshire Hotel on January 15, “Tom practically had to drag her around,” an onlooker tells In Touch. And when Tom had a conversation with 24 star Keifer Sutherland, “Katie just stood there, looking totally bored,” the witness says.

[From In Touch print edition, January 12, 2007]

The article goes on to say that Katie is focusing on her career now and that she is in talks to star in what is sure to be a crappy movie with Queen Latifah called Mad Money. They say Tom wants more kids but that Katie probably won’t be popping out another one soon.

In Touch is most likely checking out the pictures and making this story up, but it seems fundamentally true. Katie is branching out, and if we can be forgiven for engaging in this same overanalysis of paparazzi photos, she looks like she’s having a good time, but also that she’s acting for the cameras and no longer thinks Tom is a God like everyone else in his cult religion.

If you check out the pictures of her out with him in Miami on Superbowl weekend she has this faraway look in her eye. It’s possible that she’s planning her next move, and that she really has broken out of that Stepford mold. Those must be the thetans talking though, and some intense auditing should cure her.

Here are Katie and Tom leaving their hotel in Miami on 2/3.

Story via Sammie’s Effluvia. Pictures from KatieHolmes.com.

The amusing evil that is the 3am Girls at The Daily Mirror add some catchy lyrics to the ho-hum music of Hugh Grant’s love life

HUGH Grant’s roving eye has sparked another public spat with Jemima Khan - their second in as many weeks. While Hugh schmoozed the ladies at the post-premiere party of his latest film, Music And Lyrics, on Monday night, his girlfriend of three years was left alone and stony-faced sitting in the corner.

Now stony faced is really one of the better looks on Jemima Khan, whose face is not really her best asset. She occupies that odd rarefied position of the resident hugely horse-faced British IT girl — of some years standing with no discernible talent, charm or accomplishment. Jemima does possess a posh background, money, and has one interesting marriage to a cricket star behind her: this somehow equals tabloid glamour in the UK.

The last few years she has been working as the monogamy placeholder for Hugh Grant … the sort of post-Hurley girly that he walks around while getting up to all sorts of mischief in his doddering confirmed bachelor way

At one point, 46-year-old Hugh was overheard saying: “I can’t kiss too many more women tonight as I’ve already had a row with Jemima!” Oops…

Not that surprising when you realize their last public row was when he took her out on a tour of his old Divine Brown haunts. Almost like he’s asking for trouble … or the Universe is delivering it free of charge … surely he should be permanently avoiding Sunset Boulevard

This isn’t the only time the couple have fallen out in public. Last month, Hugh yelled at Jemima after they were left stranded on LA’s Sunset Boulevard - the very spot where he picked up hooker Divine Brown - because their car didn’t turn up after lunch.

And just last week, guests at Jemima’s 33rd birthday party at The George in Mayfair were astounded to hear Hugh accuse her of being a “dictator” and a nag - after Jemima had made a joke about him being a commitment-phobe.

Given that he blew up on a talk show yesterday when the “When you gonna marry Jemima” Question was asked …doesnt seem like she was wrong … doesnt seem like she should hang around much longer. Why the long face Jemima … is it Hugh or were you just born that way.

images via Sydney Morning Herald and Sky.com