In case you’re wondering why everything seems so slow today in the gossip world, it’s because literally EVERYONE is focused on Rupert and James Murdoch’s testimony before a Parliamentary committee in London today, all about the ongoing hacking scandal. For those of us on the East Coast, the junk started this morning at 9 am, and has gone throughout the day. It makes me wish that I had asked for the day off, because even though the British politicians are much too polite and even though James and Rupert Murdoch don’t appear to actively be monsters, the testimony process is absolutely fascinating. Also interesting? The familial dynamics. I feel like Rupert is incredibly protective of his son James, and James is incredibly protective of his father.

You know what bugs? Even though I’m not going to cover the epic-ness of what’s going down at this committee hearing, I appreciate the fact that it’s going down, and I enjoy the seriousness of what’s going down. What I don’t appreciate is when some dumbass actually makes me feel pity for an 80-year-old warmongering jackass. A few hours ago, British comedian Johnnie Marbles attacked Rupert with a plate of shaving cream, just after he tweeted, “It is a far better thing that I do now than I have ever done before #splat”. Wendi Dang-Murdoch, Rupert’s young wife who was (and is) sitting behind Rupert during his testimony, had lightening-fast reflexes and she screamed “NO! NO!” and smacked the sh-t out of Johnnie Marbles. The dude was arrested and the proceedings were interrupted, etc. Here’s video:

Literally NO ONE had sympathy for Rupert Murdoch before this. Now he’s some poor, out-of-it old fart who was attacked by a beatnik loser.

Here’s video of Rupert talking about how this is the most “humbling day” of his life. Later on, a female politician misquoted him and said it was the “most humiliating” day of his life:

Photos courtesy of WENN & Pacific Coast News.