What does the couple who has everything do for Valentine’s Day? Well, they hang out with Sean Penn (oh really?) and take the kids to Benihana. Hmm… that might be better than Britney Spears Valentine’s Day, but it’s still not what I would expect. Actually, they took the kids to Benihana on Friday night, and Life & Style has the details… including some stuff about Angelina’s love of shrimp! Epic:

Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie put on a stunning display of togetherness when they took their three eldest children for a Valentine’s Day eve dinner at the Benihana restaurant that was a childhood haunt of Angie’s.

“Angie’s been coming in here since she was 2-years-old, an eyewitness at the restaurant tells Life & Style. “She’d come here with her parents and brother and loved to sit at the table and watch the chefs cook her shrimp.”

Bringing her own family recaptured fond memories for Angie.

“She came with Brad, Maddox, Pax and Zahara,” says the eyewitness. “She obviously took great joy in re-creating the experience of her childhood as the children enjoyed the spectacle of the food being cooked. They were all smiling and laughing.”

The chef prepared a Valentine’s Day treat by turning the kids’ vegetables into heart shapes, while Angie enjoyed her past favorite, shrimp with vegetables and edamame. Brad had Kobe beef.

“Brad and Angelina looked so happy,” a second witness tells Life & Style. “He stroked her neck and hand, and they kissed several times and looked on proudly as their kids used chopsticks and enjoyed their food.”

The family looked as happy as ever and, says the eyewitness, “completely in love.”

[From Life & Style Magazine]

That’s nice I guess. I can’t imagine Empress Zahara enjoyed watching her food being prepared. Unless it was cookies. As for the Sean Penn rumors, that came from Us Weekly, who reported that Sean spent the whole day with the Brange at their LA home. There is absolutely no detail about what that’s all about, but I do not like that Brad and Sean hang out together. Sean is a horrible influence for Brad. Maybe they were discussing Madonna? You know Angelina can’t stand the Madge.

Angelina, Brad, Zahara and Shiloh in New York on December 29, 2009, and BP & AJ on January 6, 2010. Credit: CWNY/Fame Pictures.

For some strange reason, the tabloids are full of stories about Jake Gyllenhaal this week. None of the stories is all that scandalous or interesting, but put them all together and perhaps a picture will form. What is that picture? That Jake could be very, very upset about his breakup with Reese, and that everyone is trying to help him and set him up on dates and cheer him up and give him advice. That’s seriously the theme of these stories… which I find strange. Do I buy that Jake is the kind of guy who gets utterly devastated by a breakup and mopes around Hollywood parties getting advice from Sean Penn? Hmmm…

First up, In Touch claims that Jake’s Brothers costar and friend Tobey Maguire tried to set him up with a Reese Witherspoon-lookalike, only this girl had curly hair. Jake and the girl “seemed to hit it off on their first date… he was listening intently whenever she spoke.” One of Jake’s “friends” tells the mag that Jake is “lonely” and that he “wants a girlfriend.” Oh, he’s one of those guys. Those guys who don’t know how to function without a girlfriend or wife. Those guys are strange, in my opinion.

Meanwhile, Star Magazine reports that Reese and Jake are still talking, and might consider getting back together. Reese is “torn apart” since dumping Jake, and her kids are upset too. A friend tells Star: “Reese said Ava has been e-mailing Jake, asking him to come back. Reese says she realizes he’s more mature than she gave him credit for, and he won’t just walk away from her like Ryan did. That was her big concern.” And what about Jake? “His heart was broken… he said they should take a few months to figure out where they stand.”

And finally, both Star Magazine and the National Enquirer have stories about Jake and Sean Penn bonding or something. In Star’s version, Sean was introducing Jake to models at a party a few weeks ago, and Sean and Tobey Maguire acted as Jake’s “wingmen” because he was too shy to talk to the girls right away. This version seems totally… weird. The Enquirer’s version sounds a bit better though:

Bad boy Sean Penn is giving Jake dating advice!

Jake was moping his way through a party at Hollywood’s Chateau Marmont on January 9 when Penn stepped in.

“It was obvious Jake was upset. He wasn’t smiling or talking much, so Sean walked over to him, patted him on the back, and told him to be thankful he and Reese never got married,” an insider divulged. “Sean told Jake that marriage is overrated, and he should enjoy the single life because he has the rest of his life to be married.”

“Jake looked like he was taking Sean’s anti-marriage advice to heart. He smiled a lot more after their little chat.”

[From The National Enquirer, print edition, February 1, 2010]

Okay, how screwed up do you have to be to not only get advice from Sean Penn, but to actually take that advice? If Sean Penn told me to duck, I would jump up. If he told me to go right, I would go left. If he told me to zig, I would zag. So, my advice to Jake: either ignore Penn, or just do the opposite of whatever he told you. So… don’t enjoy the single life. Get married. And continue moping around.

It was just the other day that a shredder-mask-clad Madonna and Jesus Luz went out and about in New York, so I have to think there probably aren’t any serious problems in their “relationship”. However, Jesus should watch his back (re: his wallet lovingly provided to him by the Madge Vadge, fully stocked with cash she bribes him with). Because Us Weekly is reporting that Madge and her first husband, Sean Penn, went out on a dinner date last night. Oh, God. And you know Sean is single now. Granted, he was allegedly dating some model or maybe that girl over there or whomever. But Sean seems like the kind of guy who likes to reminisce with exes. “Reminisce” meaning “checking into the Madge Vadge Motel”. You can check out any time you like, but you can never leave.

It’s been over twenty years since Madonna and Sean Penn divorced — and these days, the once-warring couple are friendly enough to break bread together.

Madonna, 51, and Penn, 49, shared a three-hour, one-on-one dinner at four-star Alain Ducasse restaurant in Manhattan on Thursday; TMZ has video footage documenting their exits from the venue.

In what was the first marriage for them both, the pop superstar and acclaimed actor were married, not-so-peacefully, from 1985 to 1989. (The media dubbed them the “Poison Penns” at the time for their constant fighting; Penn famously assaulted a photographer angling for a picture of Madonna.)

Madonna went on to marry Guy Ritchie in 2000; she gave birth to his son, Rocco, that year, and they later adopted David Banda in Malawi. (Madonna has a daughter from a previous relationship, and has since adopted a daughter, Mercy James, in Malawi.) The entertainer has been dating Brazilian model Jesus Luz, 23, since early 2009.

Penn married Robin Wright Penn in 1996, and they have two children; after a few splits and reconciliations the couple confirmed that they’re divorcing last year.

[From Us Weekly]

Okay, just to be nice, I’m going to say that Madonna and Sean are probably still relatively close, and probably have something like a healthy relationship for two exes. Their dinner was probably not about sex or rekindling any sort of relationship, but rather two old friends shooting the sh-t. But, another part of me thinks that Madge and Sean don’t really know what a healthy relationship or friendship looks like, so the dinner was probably only a flirtatious precursor to some kinky sh-t. I wonder if Sean likes Madge’s new face?

Promotional image of ‘Shanghai Surprise’ courtesy of The Guardian and The Daily Mail.

Actress Robin Wright Penn, the estranged and reportedly long-suffering wife of Sean Penn, showed up to the premiere of her new movie, “The Private Lives of Pippa Lee,” with two very noticeable changes: first, she’s once again dropped the “Penn” from her surname. And second, she’s traded in her familiar long blond hair for a darker shade. While Robin doesn’t elaborate on what prompted her to file for divorce this time, she has said in multiple interviews that this time, the separation from Sean Penn is for good, and she’s looking forward to starting over.

Robin Wright is doing just fine without Sean Penn. The actress has dropped Penn from her name and turned her blond hair brown. She wowed guests at the star-studded Cinema Society screening of her movie “The Private Lives of Pippa Lee” on Sunday night. Showing off her slim figure in a Herve Leger dress, she was overheard saying, “This is all about new beginnings for me.” Wright was seen chatting with writer/director Rebecca Miller and husband Daniel Day-Lewis at the packed party at the Breslin attended by stars, including Penelope Cruz, Marion Cotillard and Billy Crudup. Her co-star Blake Lively, accompanied by boyfriend Penn Badgley, was also the talk of the evening in a plunging white jacket. But Lively admitted she still gets nervous seeing herself on screen. She told Page Six: “I loved the role, but it is hard to watch myself with so many people in the theater.”

[From Page Six]

In a recent “Entertainment Weekly” interview, Robin gets a little more specific about her new beginnings, and what this new role in “Pippa Lee” meant to her.

In recent months, the actress has overhauled just about every aspect of her life. In August, she filed for divorce from Sean Penn, shed his last name and put an end to the turbulent 20-year relationship, during which they broke up and reconciled at least three times. Shortley thereafter, she moved back to L.A. (with kids Dylan, 18, and Hopper, 16) after 12 years of raising a family in Marin County, near San Franscisco. Her new home, in Santa Monica, happens to be on the same eucalyptus-shaded street where she lived 25 years ago while shooting her breakthrough role in 1987′s The Princess Bride. “I didn’t want to raise my kids in this weird, sycophantic society,” Wright says, referring to Hollywood. “If you have celebrity parents, it’s not a good recipe for the kids, or anyone at any age. Look at what Brad and Angelina go through.”

The notoriously selective star has also thrown herself back into work. After stealing scenes from Russell Crowe in the political thriller State of Play, she won a chorus of critical shout-outs playing a chain-smoking flirt in last month’s New York, I Love You. Now she’s about to do double-duty in Robert Zemeckis’ 3-D animated holiday extravaganza Disney’s A Christmas Carol as both a 9-year-old moppet and Scrooge’s neglected fiance, Belle. Then comes her substantial and potentially career-changing role as the title character in The Private Lives of Pippa Lee, out Nov. 27.

“I read the script, and I was like, ‘I’ll give my left tit to play this role,’ and that’s huge for me, because I don’t have any tits,” she says. “Meryl Streep, Julianne Moore, and the Kates all have gotten great roles, and were so good in them, and now I got one,” she smiles. “I finally got one.”

Wright’s face darkens when asked about her divorce from Penn. “I don’t want to talk about it in great detail because it will all be reflected back to him, and I’m not interested in sharing that with people,” she says. “I have no regrets. I have two wonderful kids, and when I’m asked ‘Why did you leave?’ I guess, it was just ‘I’m going over here now.’” She takes a breather to gaze out at the Pacific and adds her last two words on the subject: “New book.”

[From Entertainment Weekly]

I’ve always thought Robin Wright was a fantastic actress who just needed the right role – maybe this one is it. She certainly seems a lot happier these days, even while Penn has taken up with a 25-year-old swimsuit model. As for the hair color change, I’m thinking it might be for a role or something. It actually makes her look a bit younger than the blond but I don’t think it’s a long-term thing. I’m rooting for her, and for her career.

Last week, some outlets reported that Sean Penn and Robin Wright’s 16-year-old son Hopper was arrested at his Malibu school. The school and the police wouldn’t confirm the arrest (because he’s a minor), but Radar had sources who initially claimed that Hopper was arrested for possession of narcotics. Now it’s looking more like it was all some kind of big misunderstanding. A source is telling Radar now that Hopper will not face any charges because the “possession of narcotics” was simply Hopper’s prescription medication.

Sean Penn’s 16-year-old son Hopper Jack will NOT face charges in connection with his arrest last week at his high school in the Malibu area.

A source close to the investigation exclusively tells RadarOnline.com that the District Attorney’s office has closed their investigation after Hopper proved that the drugs found on him were in fact prescription medication in his name.

Hopper was taken into custody by sheriff’s deputies when the medication was discovered on him, but after an investigation, the D.A.’s office Wednesday decided no charges were warranted. Authorities will not say what type of medication was involved.

[From Radar]

That story turned on a dime, didn’t it? At first people were like “of course Sean Penn’s son is into drugs, look at his whackadoodle father.” And now people are like “my bad, it was nothing, sorry to overreact.” I do wonder what kind of medication Hopper is on, though. But it’s none of my business.

In one last piece of Penn-Wright family news, Robin Wright was interviewed in an upcoming issue of Entertainment Weekly, and she described how difficult it is to raise her children with any kind of connection to Hollywood, mainly because of all of the junk with the paparazzi. She says: “I didn’t want to raise my kids in this weird, sycophantic society. If you have celebrity parents, it’s not a good recipe for the kids, or anyone at any age. Look at what Brad and Angelina go through.” Robin knows it too – she and Sean were still together when Brad and Sean worked together on The Tree of Life. She must have seen it first hand.

Sean Penn is shown out on 7/14/09 and 2/27/09. Credit: PRPhotos

Sean Penn has long been known for his bad temper. He’s certainly not a happy-go-lucky sort, and comes across as rather surly much of the time. Given all that, it’s not surprising to hear that he attacked a paparazzo on Friday. The photographer, Jordan Dawes, was at the Brentwood Country Mart taking photos of celebs from inside his car. As Sean Penn pulled into the parking lot, Dawes started photographing him. However things got ugly when Dawes got out of his car and Sean saw him – and went ballistic, chasing, kicking, and hitting the guy.

The paparazzo in the alleged Sean Penn scuffle is not taking his supposed altercation with the actor lying down. Photographer and self-proclaimed documentarian Jordan Dawes spoke to E! News exclusively about his alleged beat-down Friday afternoon, for which he filed a police report against the Oscar winner.

According to Dawes, he and four other photographers and videographers were waiting at the Brentwood Country Mart for the Milk star that afternoon. When Penn got out of his car, the photog started snapping pictures of the actor from his vehicle, which he claims was parked about 50 feet away from Penn.

When Dawes got out of his car and started taking photos of Penn, that’s when Penn approached him, the photog said. “He beelined it for me and started kicking me in the legs,” Dawes said. “As I was backing away, I was still shooting. Then he got me to the other side of the street and punched me in the arm and in my camera.” According to the shutterbug, the 49-year-old star threatened to “put him in a box” and told him he would remember his face.

“My camera was damaged,” Dawes said. “I’m all bruised up…I empathize with the photographers now, I really do. It’s horrifying.” The paparazzo said he turned in photos taken during the alleged attack to authorities, but hasn’t decided whether to take civil action against Penn.

E! News has confirmed that a police report was filed in the incident. “We can confirm that a battery report involving a member of the paparazzi was taken on Friday the 2nd at about 1:15 p.m. in the 300 block of Mesa Drive, but we are not confirming the names in the complaint,” Officer Karen Rayner of LAPD Media Relations said.

[From E! News]

No one from Sean Penn’s camp has responded as of yet. I find it really hard to figure out who to sympathize with here. Yeah, celebrities know that when they become famous, photographers are going to hound them. But when you see videos of the way the paparazzi does it – how many there are, how loud they are, how close they are – it’s hard not to sympathize with anyone living like that. I would never want to be famous for that reason alone. The excessive money would probably help soften the blow though. Obviously Sean Penn wasn’t being surrounded by a throng of paps. But I can see how, over the years, the sight of any photographer could get to be too much. We all have our breaking point, and Sean Penn’s is obviously a shorter distance than most people’s.

That said, he’s still responsible for his actions. I can imagine why he might have done what he did, but I’m not saying it’s okay. He assaulted a man who wasn’t harming him in any way, just annoying him. Oh, and he looked like an absolute buffoon doing it, according to these TMZ photos. Being that Jordan Dawes is a paparazzo, I’m assuming it’s safe to say he’ll be filing a massive civil suit shortly. I’m betting Penn will settle quietly out of court – I’m guessing $15,000. That just feels like the right number for being kicked by Sean Penn, and just enough to get the guy to drop his case.

My question is, when will Dawes’ pictures come out? Those have got to be some interesting shots.

Here’s Sean running from the paps in August.

Sean Penn doesn’t seem to be mourning the loss of his marriage to Robin Wright Penn. Robin called it quits, finally, last month. She gave several interviews where she sounded like she had finally come to terms with the fact that Sean Penn sucks as a person, and that she could do a lot better. Allegedly, Sean did try to reconcile with Robin at first, but she was totally over his tantrums.

After that, the rumors morphed into claims that Madonna and Sean would or were reconnecting. Though that would be really juicy gossip if they were getting back together, I really think that Sean isn’t interested in women his own age. He likes ‘em young. So it came as no surprise when Sean stepped out publicly with his latest “girlfriend” – 25-year-old model Jessica White. They were spotted in New York over the weekend, entering a restaurant separately. But they’ve been seen all over the place, and Sean’s definitely not hiding her:

SEAN Penn and new lady friend Jessica White seemed to have a good time this weekend.

A spy saw Penn and the Sports Illustrated model looking “very close” over dinner at Hotel Griffou on Friday. Another eyewitness reports seeing White accompany Penn hand-in-hand up to his room at the Mercer Hotel later that night.

The lovebirds were also spotted together at the Standard Hotel on Sunday night.

[From Page Six]

White is an African-American model most famous for her appearances in the Sports Illustrated swimsuit issues. In her modeling pics, her body looks insane, but in candid, paparazzi shots she looks a little awkward and nothing special. White was also rumored to be dating Terrell Owens last year. She’s a very pretty girl, but it seems like… maybe she doesn’t know what she’s getting into? She’s just so young – compared to Sean. Most likely she’ll end up like Petra Nemcova – around for a few weeks, and then dumped. Maybe they’re using each other – Jessica is using Sean to raise her profile, while Sean just wants someone pretty around for his midlife crisis.

Would you want to live in a world where Sean Penn and Madonna were hooking up again? Or worse, actually had feelings for each other? I know, I shudder at the thought. Each of them are sort of volatile in their own way. And while I’m too young to remember their marriage, the very idea of it sure sounds like a bad one to me. But according to In Touch, that’s exactly what’s about to happen. You see, Madonna is now single. Sean Penn is now single. So naturally, they’re going to get it on. It is a statistical inevitability.

Now that Sean Penn’s wife, Robin Wright, has decided to divorce him once and for all, the actor has turned to a familiar face for comfort — ex-wife Madonna! A friend says Madonna, 51, and Sean, 49, have stayed in touch since having cocktails last November at New York’s Greenwich Hotel and have helped each other through their respective splits (she divorced Guy Ritchie in 2008). And though she is casually dating Jesus Luz, “Madonna still considers Sean her soulmate,” her friend reveals. “It’s highly possible that she and Sean will somehow get back together now that they’ll both be divorced.” The volatile pair were married from 1985-1989.

[From In Touch]

Here’s the thing: while a potential relationship strikes me as a disaster waiting to happen, it could also be perfect. I mean if you think of the worst things that are said about Madonna and the worst things that are said about Sean, they’re pretty similar. In a way, they deserve each other. As punishment for being controlling, overbearing, manipulative… I could keep going. But I think since their marriage they’ve each gravitated towards submissive partners that they could dominate and control. That certainly wouldn’t be the case if they were to date each other again.

And while I ride In Touch for taking some big leaps with their reporting, Madge and Sean are definitely still friendly. Remember that story about him texting her after he kissed co-star James Franco in “Milk”? “‘I just popped my cherry kissing a guy. I thought of you. I don’t know why.’” If that doesn’t say “permanent love bond,” I don’t know what does.

Robin Wright Penn is totally done with Sean Penn. We could have figured this out last week, when Robin delivered the one-two punch to Sean, badmouthing their relationship in a magazine interview, then filing for divorce the next day. After all that Robin had put up with, I don’t think anyone begrudged her statement at the time: “I hit that crossroad a while ago. I know what I don’t want. There’s no limbo anymore. There’s no time. I’m too old for this sh-t.” It was a long time coming, and now the Enquirer is reporting that Robin is keeping her act together as Sean begs her to come back. Robin hit her breaking point after accumulating twenty years of “the lies, the cheating rumors and the temper tantrums.” Well done, Robin:

Sean Penn begged his wife to stay with him – but she ignored his desperate pleas, moved out and filed for divorce.

“Robin finally stood her ground and said she’d had enough,” a source close to both told the Enquirer. “She got her own place and moved out.”

Sean pleaded for one more chance, said the source, but Rob filed divorce papers in Marin County on August 12.

“Robin doesn’t want a dime from Sean – nothing,” said the source. “She’s just had it with all the lies, the cheating rumors and the temper tantrums. Now she just wants to be left alone to start her life over. Sean is still begging her to take him back. But Robin insists it is finally over.”

Sean and Robin had been together since 1989, and married in 1996. When Sean filed for separation in April of this year, he withdrew it a month later.

“It was an arrogant mistake,” pugnacious Penn told a reporter at the time. He tried hard for a reconciliation, but in a recent interview, Robin revealed she had no plans to fix the broken marriage. “I know what I don’t want,” she said.

[From the National Enquirer, print edition, September 7 2009]

Here’s the thing – if Robin ever did go back to Sean, my guess is that nothing would really change. He would still treat her like dirt, he would still lie and cheat and throw his asinine tantrums, just because that’s their dynamic. It’s better if he just finds some young girl who thinks that those qualities make him some kind of complicated genius. I hope Robin continues to show this backbone, and I hope she moves on with someone really great. I swear, I could see her with Clooney. If only he liked smart women his own age.

Robin Wright Penn and Sean Penn are shown at the premiere of Milk on 11/13/09. Credit: WENN.com

I have a confession. When I was writing today’s earlier post about Robin Wright Penn’s interview with More Magazine, I got confused. You see, Sean and Robin have split up and gotten back together so many times over the past few years, I really thought that they had been split up for several months now. I had forgotten that Sean pulled a “takesies-backsies” on the separation, and pulled out of several films under the guise of “spending time with his family”. So it looks like Sean and Robin were technically together all of this time (or at least since May, maybe). My bad. I had forgotten that.

What’s strange is that I might have been right in my initial confusion, judging from Robin’s recent activities. In her More interview, Robin makes it sound like she’s been coming to terms with their split for months. And now, to make it official, she filed for divorce in a Marin County court this morning:

Robin Wright Penn has filed for divorce from her husband Sean Penn, PEOPLE has learned.

The papers, filed in Marin County, Calif., on Aug. 12, state that “both parties have already agreed to [shared] custody” over their minor son, Hopper Jack, 16, and that “the estranged couple have already agreed to division of all property.”

The reason for the split is listed as “irreconcilable differences.” Wright Penn, best known for roles in The Princess Bride and Forrest Gump, is not seeking spousal support.

Lawyers for both sides weren’t immediately available for comment.

Together since 1989 and married in 1996, the couple endured a roller-coaster relationship, filing papers to initiate divorce not once, but twice – only to patch things up again as recently as May.

In an interview released Monday, the actress told More magazine that she had no plans to reconcile with her husband. “I hit that crossroad a while ago,” she said. “I know what I don’t want.”

Regarding the much-discussed marriage of the two actors, friends tell More magazine for its September issue that the couple had a “peculiar chemistry.” Penn Wright herself said, “I, we, have two amazing children we raised together.”

This fall, daughter Dylan Frances, 18, is headed off to college, with son Hopper Jack preparing to follow suit.

[From People]

Well, good for her. Robin just lost 200 pounds of douche off her back. It’s good that she was the one doing all of the legal stuff too. What interests me about Robin and Sean now is their kids. Will Dylan and Hopper Jack be as messed up as I think? I have no doubt that Robin is a great mom – but that kind of weird we’re-splitting-up-no-we-aren’t stuff is tedious and damaging. Trust me.

Here’s Robin at Cannes in May. Image thanks to WENN.com . Header of Sean and Robin at the Oscars in February. Images thanks to Fame Pictures .