This is part of the reason I don’t tweet much. I’ve gotten into trouble in the past bitching about people who have done me wrong. (And we’re talking once, but that was back when you could still search on deleted tweets so the person found it anyway.) Sons of Anarchy creator Kurt Sutter took to Twitter to complain that his show was snubbed by the Emmy nominating committee. He called them old and joked that they screwed him out of a threesome with his wife, the show’s star Katey Sagal, who had “promised me a threesome if we won.” Then he went on to mock Glee and sort-of try to take it back. Classy.

After the Emmy noms were announced this morning, Kurt Sutter went to Twitter and fired off the following:

“The worse part of not getting an emmy nod. katey [his wife] promised me a threesome if she won. now i have to settle for me, her and the shaved bunny.”

“Best part of not getting an emmy nod. now i don’t have to pretend i give a s**t about the profiteering douchebag academy … because you know if we were nominated i’d be all humble and blowing smoke up their asses. now i can stay true to myself and just be a d**k.”

He continues with a joke — “These two academy member walk into a bar. one orders a beer. then they both die because they’re so f**king old.”

And … “If my mom and dad were alive this emmy snub would kill them. that’s not true, they were too old to understand my show. just like the academy.”

Sutter also took aim at “Glee” … writing, “f**k glee. hate those annoying, ‘please accept me for who i am’, singing brats. there, i said it. are you happy?”

He went on to explain, “I love ryan murphy ['Glee' creator]. he’s always very cool with me. love glee too. just tired of all the j**z piling up at its feet.”

[From TMZ]

Later he tweeted “you do know that i’m really okay with no noms right? if i was really upset, i wouldn’t be ranting. i’d be plotting. i’m all about the love” and followed up with “those who got the joke, laughed. those who didn’t, published a story. so sad that greedy media whores must turn good fun into nasty business.” It’s all our fault for paying attention to what he wrote, an argument so many celebrities have used before ad nauseum. Way to write about the same people who help promote your show.

I tried to get into Sons of Anarchy. I didn’t start from the beginning though, I started from season three, watched about four episodes and just found it too hard to keep up with. It was complicated and hard to follow. Compare that to Boardwalk Empire, which I also didn’t start watching until mid-season. There’s a lot of mobster stuff going on with that show and I’ll be honest some minor plot details were lost to me, but I could still watch it and find it entertaining. Sons of Anarchy frustrated me, but I did enjoy what I saw, just not enough to care what happened next or keep watching. Maybe it’s just not everyone’s cup of tea, it doesn’t have to do with people being too “old” to enjoy it. You wouldn’t expect a whiny bitch like Sutter to get that though. He has much more in common with Ryan Murphy than he thinks.

Header photo from 3/8/10. Photo below from 8/30/10. Credit: WENN.com

My first response on seeing these photos from the Breaking Bad Season 4 premiere was “Yay, Breaking Bad is coming back,” then “Aaron Paul looks hot,” then “what did these actresses do to their faces? They’re looking pulled and plumped and hard to recognize.” So first of all, Breaking Bad is definitely coming back after way too long a hiatus, but sadly it’s not coming until July 17th. Damn you, AMC, for running this premiere party over two weeks early.

Aaron Paul does look hot. He’s 31 too so I don’t need to feel guilty.

And holy crap, that’s Walt Jr.! RJ Mitte is only 18, so I do feel guilty. I just checked Wiki and he does have mild cerebral palsy, just like his character. I wouldn’t have guessed that. I also thought he was 20 something because he is looking good.

Bryan Cranston, who I find old-hot. Like too old for me typically since he’s 55, but I still would, even when he had that fug facial hair. It’s just his personality. He’s the best actor.

Betsy Brandt, Marie, looks weird and pinched here, right? Her face looks totally different than it does on the show.

For comparison, here she is in August with similar eye makeup. Too much work ages you!

Anna Gunn, Skyler, is also looking a little too Toxed, but not terrible. It might also have to do with her new hair color, which I think she was sporting on the show too at the end of last season.

Giancarlo Esposito, Gus, who I’m putting up here to discuss what Walt and Jesse can possibly do now that they got on this evil mofo’s bad side. The end of season three was so explosive that I really don’t see an out for them. Of course Gus needs them now but he’s not going to put up with them for long. You know they’ll scrape by somehow. I can’t wait two and a half weeks for this show! It’s already been two damn long.

Here’s the trailer for season 4 of Breaking Bad.

Breaking Bad (Season 4 Trailer) by chill-pill

Photo credit: WENN.com

Last night was the premiere of True Blood’s first episode for season 4, one of twelve. First of all, much love to HBO for creating HBOGo, where I’ve been able to get these excellent screenshots. It’s free for HBO subscribers and incredibly convenient. (I’ve also been watching Game of Thrones this weekend and have a couple episodes left to go. That show is amazing.)

A lot of time was spent in this episode establishing where the characters are, introducing new characters and catching us up. The show dragged in parts, but the last fifteen minutes were very well done and included many promising plot twists for the coming season.

This episode opened with a very dumb sequence featuring Sookie in fairy land. We’ve already seen the first eight minutes as they were released by HBO online, and they were disappointing. In that sequence she reunited with her grandfather, a fairy, and when the two of them escaped from the fairy realm Sookie’s grandfather died shortly after re-entry. There was a lot of melodrama as she watched him pass away in the cemetary. (Update: read Sofiel’s comment below. It’s not the case that this was the same fairy grandfather character from the books, it was supposedly her real grandfather stuck in fairy land.) This varied quite a bit from the books in that 1. she never knew this man as her true grandfather until he told her he was and 2. he used to flit in and out of the fairy realm and visit her. From what I remember there was no big death sequence, at least not this early on, and he was a very likable recurring character that used to help her out. It’s too bad they went this route with the series.

When Sookie got back to her house it was under construction. Her brother Jason returned to tell her that she had been missing for over a year and he’d sold it to some company that had been doing renovations. Sookie told him it felt like she’d been gone for just 15 minutes, and conveyed the message from their grandfather. Jason said “I believe you, but if you start telling people that you time traveled to a land of fairies, they gonna put you away.”

Bill came right at dusk and told Sookie he thought she’d died after he didn’t feel her presence for over a year. She was a little cold to him, and later said that to her it felt like just an hour ago that he’d broken her heart.

Eric showed up with his snarling hotness to say that everyone else had abandoned Sookie when they thought she was dead, but that he never gave up hope. “I knew you weren’t dead. I’d never lost hope… understand this. Everyone who claims to love you, your friends, your brother, Bill Compton. They all gave up on you. I never did.”

Then Sheriff Andy showed up to lighten the mood. He was unintentionally funny as hell and scolded Sookie for disappearing for a year. Bill covered for her, claimed she was on official vampire business and promised he would pay back the search efforts. Andy got upset and yelled at Sookie “For 13 straight months I’ve had that open case on my books. If it weren’t for you, this years Louisiana’s safe streets plaque would be on my wall and not f’ing Webster Parrish. You owe me a plaque!”

In the police cruiser, Jason busted Andy for using V. I just wanted to include the screenshot above. I love Jason.

Lafayette and his boyfriend Jesus then went to a witches circle although Lafayette protested about it. The dead vampire that Jason’s ex girlfriend killed, Eddie, talked to Lafayette through a witch and freaked him out, causing him to leave.

Then we saw Jessica and Hoyt having typical domestic issues. They fought over the fact that Jessica never cooks for him. She angrily served him up a bunch of broken uncooked eggs and he ate some of it. Then they laughed over it.

The next scene was one of the best in this episode, and involved Eric doing a PSA for vampire relations while Bill attended a ribbon cutting ceremony at a Bon Temps retirement home. Eric croons to the camera “Who would you rather trust, a vampire or a politician?” This scene also introduced (spoiler for future episodes) Portia Bellefleur, Bill’s future love interest in the books. She’s much prettier on the show than she’s described in the books.

We then saw that Tara has moved to New Orleans, where she is involved in some kind of underground women’s fighting ring. She’s in a relationship with the woman she was fighting with, and they made out outside the venue. The other woman called her “Tony” and in a later scene revealed that she thinks Tara is from Atlanta. It’s clear that Tara lies to her girlfriend and has fabricated a lot of her past.

Sookie went to Merlottes to catch up with everyone. She learned that Arlene and Terry got married and had a baby, and that Tara moved away and sends postcards sometimes. Sam told Sookie that the vampire business must have been really important to keep everyone greiving for a year. He gave her her job back part time.

Jessica and Hoyt went to Fangtasia, where a hot fangbanger tried to pick up Jessica when Hoyt had his back turned. Jessica ran into the bathroom to clear her head, which is when Pam came in to confront her. This was another excellent scene.

Jessica said “Me and Hoyt, we moved in together.”

Pam countered “That tree with the plaid shirt, it has a name? He seems sweet and all if you’re into that sort of thing, but if you’re making him bring you here, I have a hunch it’s not enough.”

“It was his idea, like a date night.”

Pam goaded her “The way you’re eye f’ing fang bangers from across the room, that’s especially romantic. You have no reason to feel guilty, you’re a hunter. You’ve never been on your own, you live with a human. Monogamously. [laughs] Sorry, it’s just so ridiculous.”

“Don’t you think if all I wanted to do was kill and f*ck that I’d be out there doing it right now? I don’t know what you saw or what you think you saw, but when I go home tonight I’m going home with the man I love. I’m just sorry that you never had that.”

Sam got drunk at a dinner party with two hot women and a man. They talked about anger management issues. Then they all got naked and a bunch of horses ran out in the night. I guess it was a shapeshifter gathering. I thought it was going to be an orgy at first.

Jason delivered food to the kids in Hotshot. They talked about how “aunt Crystal” is gone. Then a guy tricked him into looking into a standing freezer, pushing him in and locking it, trapping him inside.

At the witches circle with Lafayette and Jesus they brought a bird back to life for a moment, surprising everyone.

One of the witches is a spy, and we saw her walking to a heavily guarded mansion afterwards. She sat down in front of a regal looking desk and then addressed “your Majesty,” and it’s Bill! I guess he’s taken over somehow.

In the final scene, Sookie got naked at her house to get ready for bed, and all of a sudden Eric was there, grunting sexily. “Such a strange sensation when the reality matches what you’ve pictured in your mind so precisely,” he purred.

She asked him if it was a dream and he said “it’s not a dream, I assure you.”

“Then how are you here? I rescinded your invitation.”

“You don’t own the house anymore,” he said, holding up the keys, “I do.”

“Why would you do that, why would you buy my house?”

“Because I always knew you were alive, and if I owned the house, I would own you.”

Then he bared his teeth and walked toward her, “Sookie, you are mine.”

That was it. We won’t be doing these long recaps every week, but I have to say I really enjoyed that episode, especially towards the end. There were plot twists that were stupid, namely the fairy business, but I’m intrigued by the witches, I like that Tara has a whole new life and background she invented, and I love the potential romance between Sookie and Eric. She has to want it, though, it can’t be forced. Eric is going about it the wrong way but he’ll surely be successful in the end. And it will be hot as hell.

Mild Spoilers for True Blood Season Four
True Blood comes back to HBO in just over a week, on June 26th. I haven’t been keeping up with all the news about the fourth season, but from what I’ve heard the series will use certain key plot details from the books, including a romance between two lead characters. It’s unclear how closely it will follow the books though, and as we’ve seen so far you can rely on twists and changes that will try and keep it unpredictable for those of us who have read all the Charlaine Harris novels. However, there were a lot of cheesy things in the book series that I would like to see played down, particularly the fairy angle. Judging from this latest preview clip from HBO, below, that’s not going to happen.

Spoilers for this clip obviously. It’s the first eight minutes of the first show. This immediately reminded me of Star Trek, and I just noticed that someone commented to that effect on YouTube as well. It’s frankly a little dumb and disappointing and you would think they would come up with a better opener to the season than this fairy fantasy fight sequence.

Meanwhile these “Got Blood” type cast portraits are pretty awesome, and remind me of all the great characters on this show, including some of the lesser players who are played by some incredibly talented actors, like Hoyt, Terry and Andy. I’ll watch this show with interest as always, but this latest clip has me raising my eyebrows and wondering how ridiculous it’s about to get. I like the vampire, the werewolf and the shapeshifter storylines. When you add in some fairies that go evil in an alternate universe it’s kind of too much, regardless of what’s in the books.

Thanks to E! Online for the heads up and True Blood Online for the photos, where there are some more.

You know how TMZ just repeats everything a celebrity team feeds them lately without really questioning it or using common sense? (See their Lohan coverage.) I’m hoping that’s the case for this latest story that Charlie Sheen is in “deep negotiations” for his own sitcom in which he’ll be surrounded by a team of sycophants who don’t make him stop smoking crack or paying the stars of the “Barely Legal” porn series to keep him company for as long as they can stand it. Supposedly Charlie is just about to score a full series sitcom, not just a one-off test pilot, that will be aired on a “major network.”

Sources connected with Charlie Sheen tell TMZ … the actor is negotiating a “big offer” for a new TV series that could debut as early as January, 2012.

We’re told Charlie’s reps are in “deep negotiations” and the deal could be done by week’s end.

Our sources say the sitcom is being written specifically around Charlie and will air on a broadcast network. The deal does not call for a pilot. The show would go straight to series.

Our sources would not reveal details about the sitcom, except to say Chuck Lorre is NOT involved.

[From TMZ]

Is Charlie just going to play himself again? That’s the only way I could see this playing out. Charlie’s insane creative ramblings channeled onto a sitcom instead of a ranting stage show that’s hit or miss depending on his level of sobriety. He did get huge ratings when he was spewing his drug-addled life philosophy on 20/20 and to any outlet that would listen to him. I don’t see this deal going through, though. Deadline agrees, and report that sources rule out the major three networks as having any interest in him. They break down the networks we’ve heard that Charlie was potentially negotiating with in the past, including Fox and HBO. HBO is out, since his proposed plan for a talkshow with HBO, “Sheen’s Corner,” predictably fell through. They quote a studio executive who states the obvious, the career-killer, The “Lohan” – “He is uninsurable.”

Still, I’d watch it. I try not to slow down when there’s an accident but sometimes you just can’t help it.

Photos are from 4/30/11. Credit: WENN.com

Fran Drescher has a new sitcom coming out on June 15 on TV Land called Happily Divorced. We’ll be treated to her nasal voice, ear-splitting gaffaws and terrible outfits soon enough. I find The Nanny mildly annoying when it’s dubbed on German television, but it’s a huge hit still and is syndicated around the world so I get why Fran is back on television. (She had another series in 2005 on The WB called Living with Fran, but that only last a year.) Fran produced the Nanny along with her then-husband, who was with her for 21 years starting as her high school sweetheart and came out as gay after they split up. I vaguely remember hearing this story before, but it’s still very interesting to hear Fran explain it as the plot for her new show. She’s now friends with her ex and he has a new boyfriend. They’re even producing this new show together.

Fran Drescher plays Fran, a Los Angeles florist whose world is turned upside down when her Realtor husband, Peter (John Michael Higgins), comes out of the closet – but can’t afford to move out! And the real Fran is bringing this story to life with Peter Marc Jacobson, her longtime collaborator and actual ex husband, who announced he was gay shortly after their marriage ended! Fran tells Star about one of Hollywood’s most unlikely partnerships.

So how realistic is this story?
Well, it’s inspired by my life, but Peter and I divorced for other reasons after The Nanny ended. Then, a year or two after that he came out as gay.

How did he break the news?
He said, “I want you to know that I have been dating men of late, and I don’t want you to be shocked if a story comes out.” I was already with somebody else for a couple of years, so it didn’t impact me in the same way that it does my character?

Have [you] ever gone to [your] ex husband for relationship advice, like your character does on the show?
Actually, I dated a guy for about a year who gave me that inspiration. We were becoming friends as a trio, so if I had problems Peter would be the one who helped me resolve it. Peter became a confidant to me because he knows me so well, so through this other person we actually got closer.

Is it really possible to be with a man and not know he’s gay?
Maybe the last third of the marriage Peter got in touch with his bisexuality, but we made the choice to stay in our relationship. So we lived together for several more years. But then I needed to find myself and had a very cliche midlife crisis!

[From Star Magazine, print edition, June 20, 2011]

The real story is at the end, where Fran says her husband came out as bisexual toward the last third of their marriage, which would have been about seven years and that they stayed together through that. Was he seeing men on the side and did she give her ok to that? I can’t imagine doing that and I doubt the show will address it at all. It will probably be Will and Grace with a twist, with some contrived situations with the new boyfriend and lame jokes about their sexless marriage.

Header photo is from 2007. First Photo below from 2/24/11. Photo of Fran in white dress from 6/9/11. Holy Botox. Credit: WENN.com

Ashton Kutcher and his Jesus beard posed for a photocall at the CBS Upfronts with his costars. They’re promoting Ashton’s new role on Two in a Half Men, in which he’s stepping in for Charlie Sheen but is playing another character. I have to say he looks really good with Jon Cryer and Angus T. Jones. Jones is 17 now and is growing up into such a cute young man. TV Guide has a good explanation of how Kutcher landed this gig, and they quote an analyst who says that while his addition might make the show popular in the short term, it’s uncertain whether Kutcher has staying power. I agree with that entirely, but I could be wrong. What’s more is that a lot of the names floated in the press as up for consideration for Charlie’s job, apart from Hugh Grant, have supposedly been wrong:

It almost didn’t happen. After Sheen self-imploded and was fired from Two and a Half Men in March, the studio, network and Lorre began looking at ways to evolve the show. “From the beginning, Chuck had been keen on formulating a plan and a new character,” says one insider.

But the clock was ticking. Lorre and Co. aimed high. “They were going after movie stars,” a source says. Lorre was following the model of sitcom Spin City, which replaced star Michael J. Fox in 2000 with a film actor — coincidentally, Sheen.

Red herrings started appearing in the press: names such as Bob Saget, John Stamos and Jeremy Piven. “All the names speculated were totally wrong,” the source says. From the very beginning, Kutcher was on Lorre’s short list. The idea had big merits. He was a sitcom vet, having spent eight seasons on Fox’s That ’70s Show. Both he and Lorre got their first big career breaks inside venerable sitcom powerhouse Carsey-Werner, the studio behind That ’70s Show, as well as Roseanne, Cybill and Grace Under Fire (three shows where Lorre cut his teeth).

According to New York magazine’s website, Vulture, it was CBS Entertainment president Nina Tassler who first broached the idea with Kutcher’s lawyer, her old friend Robert Offer. But rather than put their eggs in one basket, Lorre, CBS and Warner Bros. TV were pursuing different tracks with three actors, including Hugh Grant. The idea of Grant had its internal fans, and would have dramatically changed the direction of Two and a Half Men. Grant also might have avoided many direct comparisons to Sheen because of his completely different, self-deprecating acting style. But there were also insiders who felt that Kutcher made more sense, given his ease on a multicamera sitcom stage.

Ultimately, Grant passed. “He got cold feet at the last minute,” says one insider close to the talks, and Kutcher became a front-runner.

The actor also comes with serious social-media cred, having garnered nearly 7 million followers on Twitter. And his production company, Katalyst, is already set up at Warner Bros. TV’s Warner Horizon division. Before that, Katalyst was based at CBS TV Studios, so Kutcher has worked closely with both companies for years.

For Kutcher, the high-profile gig makes sense for other reasons: His film career has generated only so-so results. This winter’s No Strings Attached garnered a decent $71 million at the box office, but last summer’s Killers was a flop. Plus, the stakes are relatively low: If Two and a Half Men stays strong, he’s a hero. If not, viewers simply don’t want to watch without Sheen.

Kutcher will also become one of the highest-paid stars in prime time, pulling down between $625,000 and $700,000 an episode (Sheen was earning $1.3 million an episode). “Ashton knows it’s a good gig,” says one insider.

“I think it’s a really good idea,” adds a rival network executive. “He’s a guy that people like. I think people definitely will want to check it out.”

Media analyst Steve Sternberg believes a Kutcher-led Men will get big sampling early on, but he harbors doubt about its long-term health: “I’m not sure Ashton Kutcher is as popular as the media thinks,” he says. “His recent movies have not performed well…[but] it could just be that he’s best-suited for TV.”

In a statement, Kutcher said, “I’m going to work my ass off to entertain the hell out of people.” Lorre, meanwhile, called him “talented, joyful and just plain remarkable.”

[From TV Guide]

I wonder which other actor Lorre was considering for the part. Could it have been Rob Lowe as rumored? He would have also been a great choice. Ashton I’m kind of “meh” on. He does look superficially good here as part of the team, but all I have to do is remember any show or movie I’ve seen him in and I come back to reality. He’s a goofball, but maybe that will play well on television again.

At the upfronts, Ashton was very positive about his new job. He said “It’s awesome to be here. I could not be more excited. I never in my 13 years of show business received more e-mails and phone calls congratulating me for this job. It’s almost like I won the lotto. And I kind of did… I got the best job in show business and I’m excited about that.”

We’ll see how he feels about it in a year or two, but over $16 million a season has got to be nice for a guy who used to make just two to three sh*t movies a year.

I vaguely remember hearing that there was some kind of Chelsea Handler sitcom coming, but I didn’t realize that it was based on her life, not her show, and that it would be rolling out soon. Chelsea is inexplicably popular despite what a bitter nasty person she is (ok, takes one to know one, etc.) and she does have two books on the NY Times non-fiction bestseller list. So I guess it’s inevitable that someone would try to turn her story into a sitcom. Laura Prepon stars as the Chelsea character and Chelsea plays her Christian conservative sister with her own characteristic deadpan humor.

Chelsea Handler’s got a starring role in the brand new NBC show based on her memoir. Weird, then, that she’s playing her own worst enemy.

NBC, which announced last week the series pickup of the memoir-based “Are You There Vodka? It’s Me Chelsea,” unveiled a long teaser trailer for the show, which actually stars “That 70′s Show” alum Laura Preppon in the thinner-than-paper “fictional” role of Chelsea Hanson. With the series based on her younger, wilder days, Handler herself plays Sloane, her (well, Preppon as her) older, pregnant, born again Christian sister.

The trailer contains plenty of canned laughter for what are largely easy jokes about DUI, alcoholism and STD’s. So, for now, what seems to be a network-scrubbed version of Handler’s talk show on E!, “Chelsea Lately.” The show doesn’t have a slot in the initial NBC lineup, but considering the shuffling the network has produced each season, it should hit airwaves sooner than later.

[From Huffington Post]

The good news is that NBC has announced its Fall schedule and this is not included. It’s like a backup show from what HuffPo is reporting.

After watching the trailer I have to admit I did laugh once – when the roommate had scratch marks from the cat and said “he’s angry ’cause he can’t talk.” Other than that it looks like a stock sitcom with typical jokes and cardboard characters. I’m annoyed that this will be on NBC, which has my favorite sitcom, Community, and my favorite drama, Parenthood. If they mess up the time slots or screw with either of those shows to give Chelsea Handler a platform so help me. NBC has no idea how to handle their decent shows, but at least they finally announced that Parenthood has been renewed. They’re waiting for a ratings dip somewhere to wedge this show in.

I like Laura Prepon, she was really good on That 70s Show, but it’s not like I’m going to watch this because she’s in it. I changed my opinion of Prepon slightly when I found out she was a Scientologist, probably because she used to date Christopher Masterson from Malcolm in the Middle. He and his brother Danny were raised in the cult.

In news that shows just how out of touch and clueless the producers of Two and A Half Men must be, they’ve hired Kelso to replace the lead formerly played by gold-toothed megalomaniac, Charlie Sheen. Ashton Kutcher will star on the show now that Charlie Sheen is unable to do anything other than smoke crack and talk about how great he is. He’ll also get a “huge payday.” I think this means that 1. the show just jumped the shark with fireworks going off in the background and 2. Kutcher is the new Ted McGinley. We just heard that Hugh Grant was in final talks to join the show when he pulled out unexpectedly due to the work commitment. So Kutcher is their second choice, and I bet it’s one they’ll regret soon enough.

Ashton Kutcher appears to have won the Two and a Half Men sweepstakes.

‘Two and a Half Men’ Seeking Sheen Replacement as CBS, Warner Bros. Agree to Split Cost

Two sources close to the deal-making tell The Hollywood Reporter that the actor is putting the final touches on a deal to replace Charlie Sheen as the star of TV’s No. 1 comedy. CBS, studio Warner Bros. and Kutcher’s reps at CAA declined to comment on the situation but a deal is said to be all but signed. The exact dollar figure he will be paid is not known but a source says Kutcher is getting a “huge payday” to join the hit sitcom.

The deal came together quickly in the wake of Hugh Grant passing on the opportunity to join the show. Now sources say Men creator Chuck Lorre has crafted a storyline to introduce Kutcher in a way that satisfies the network and studio. “It’s really funny,” says one source. “People are going to love it.”

Broadcasting & Cable reported Thursday that Kutcher’s name was surfacing as a possible Sheen replacement. The actor, who starred in the winter hit No Strings Attached, would be taking first regular series gig since catapulting to stardom on Fox’s That 70’s Show. He also executive produced the hit MTV hidden-camera series Punk’d, among others.

Kutcher brings a youthful fan base to the CBS show, as well as a big online profile with 6.7 million Twitter followers, which could help CBS promote the show.

“Chuck’s really happy,” another source says.

[From The Hollywood Reporter]

I’ve watched a few episodes of this show in light of Sheen’s spectacular meltdown, and Kutcher is in no way similar to Charlie’s character. He’s usually typecast as a doofus, not a smooth talking womanizer. (Although he may be one in real life.) This steaming pile of show with stupid jokes and very contrived plot lines is inexplicably popular around the world. I’ll reluctantly admit that Kutcher could step in with his floppy hair and awkward cluelessness and steal the show. I never understand why people watch it anyway. It’s like the TV equivalent of a cold cheeseburger. It only hits the spot when you’re incredibly hungover and there’s nothing else in the fridge.

UPDATE BY KAISER: TMZ reports that Ashton has signed on for $600,000 an episode. In what world is he worth that much?

Demi and Ashton are shown at the launch of their sketchy DNA foundation on 4/14/11. Credit: WENN.com

This news came out yesterday, but there are more details today and I couldn’t resist covering it. Apparently Hugh Grant was in talks with Two and a Half Men producers to step in and take the kind of playboy devil-may-care role that was formerly occupied by addict wordsmith Charlie Sheen. As Kaiser wrote in the links, this was a genius idea and a potential win-win that would help this lucrative sitcom continue on with another high profile lead. Grant has been starring in some sh*t movies lately (have you seen Did You Hear About The Morgans?, I did and just for Grant) and his film career has stalled but he still has star power. Unfortunately talks are said to have broken down over the intense work commitment involved, but I’m hoping that he’ll reconsider or that someone leaked this news to gauge interest. With Grant in this show, I’d definitely watch it despite the corny jokes. I still own Four Weddings and a Funeral on VHS. (shameface)

We hear that the idea of Hugh Grant as a replacement for Charlie Sheen in Two And A Half Men was first pitched to CBS boss Les Moonves and CBS entertainment president Nina Tassler about a month ago. After a couple of weeks sorting out the Sheen lawsuit fallout, the two execs blessed the plan and Grant was approached by the producers at Warner Bros. We hear Hugh flew in and had 2 creative meetings. Things were progressing and he had all but a completed deal when he backed out unexpectedly. ‘It was not the money. He didn’t want to do TV because those 24 episodes are a grind and a lot of work. At the end he couldn’t get his head around doing a series.” Another insider tells us that, if Grant committed, “the show could have gotten another 3 to 4 more seasons”.

[From Deadline Hollywood]

Initial reports had Grant being offered $1 million an episode, although Deadline has updated with the news that “Warner Bros sources are now saying it was not that much.” The guy has a complicated relationship with fame, and doesn’t like to be in the spotlight at all. He’s been in altercations with paparazzi and recently audiotaped a conversation with a paparazzo after getting him to open up about News of The World routinely bugging celebrities.

I would bet that Grant was just as daunted by the pressure of helming a big series as by the work commitment. Plus, rumor has it that his girlfriend is expecting a baby. (Which could be patently untrue, but still.) It’s a shame, because he’s a fine actor and I’ve missed seeing him on the big screen. I’d watch any crap movie he was in, including a crap show.

Hugh Grant is shown on 5/9/11. Credit: WENN.com