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Jul 27
'06
Jada Pinkett Smith claims to have seen “Suri”


Jada Pinkett Smith, Will Smith’s wife, says that she’s seen Tom and Katie’s supposed daughter and that she’s beautiful. Her quotes are much more believable than Leah Remini’s, especially since she’s a cult outsider, but I’m not buying it:

“She’s one of the sweetest babies I’ve ever met in my life,” Pinkett Smith says. “She’s an absolute beauty and she’s Daddy’s little girl.”

Pinkett Smith and her husband Will Smith have visited with Suri twice, both times at Cruise and Holmes’s Beverly Hills mansion.

“She’s beautiful and they’re very happy and they need to be left alone,” says Pinkett Smith, who described Suri while talking to PEOPLE about her participation in last weekend’s Philadelphia anti-violence event, Party 4 Peace, run by pal Charles “Charlie Mack” Alston. “She’s the cutest little baby. She’s got a head full of black, beautiful hair.”

I’ll take empirical evidence over some actress/singer’s word any day. Hey people, I saw a ghost of an old woman last night. She looked incredibly sad, had white hair in a bun, wore a long dress, and I could see through her. Now that I made that claim, that ghost must exist, right?

The Daily Mail calls the rumors that Suri doesn’t exist “conspiracy theories” and says that they’re “crazy” and “clearly inaccurate.” It’s not inaccurate to say she’s never been seen, and it’s easy to dismiss a good argument by labeling it a conspiracy theory without addressing its merits. It’s not a conspiracy theory if it’s true!

That same crappy article recycles a made up quote by Katie’s dad, who originally was said to have complained about Katie’s “Buff Brides” workout plan. They changed it around to make it sound like he was disagreeing with Scientology, but the original quote was about her fitness plan. I know it was fake because the article also featured a fake quote by Sue Fleming, the creator of Buff Brides and a family friend.

Here’s the quote from the article:

“My daughter needs rest, relaxation and recuperation. It’s all down to Scientology and I simply can’t go along with what is happening.”

Here’s the original, totally bogus quote:

“My daughter needs rest, relaxation and recuperation. Katie is already doing exercises to build up her back and shoulders and I simply can’t go along with what is happening.”

The truth is that no one knows how Katie’s parents feel about her involvement in Scientology, or about the fact that they supposedly haven’t seen their grandchild. Maybe they realize that she doesn’t exist and they’re in on the scam. Regardless if Jada Pinkett Smith has seen the little changeling, why has nary a bandle been photographed by the ever-present paparrazi?

People can claim that the baby’s being shielded by the Scientologist freaks, but wouldn’t someone take her out for a walk at least once in the more than three months that she’s supposedly been on the planet?

Posted in Babies, Cults, Jada Pinkett Smith, Katie Holmes, Scandals, Tom Cruise

Written by Celebitchy         2 Comments »
Jul 19
'06
What’s more real: Suri or the Loch Ness Monster?


People are comparing Suri to Bigfoot, so I thought I’d change it to the Loch Ness Monster to be original. Like Bigfoot and the Loch Ness Monster, there are “eyewitness” accounts, but no verifiable photographs of the Scientology savior, Suri Cruise. Something’s wrong with the baby or it simply does not exist. Katie may have had it earlier than “expected” or she may have suffered an unfortunate miscarriage that hasn’t been acknowledged. Regardless there is something off about this story that needs to be exposed by the mainstream gossip press.

All sane celebrity friends of Tom and Katie have yet to see the baby, except for Leah Remini, a devout Scientologist who now claims to have seen the infant:

Entertainment Tonight reports that the actress said in an interview in the upcoming issue of Us Weekly that she visited the baby several weeks ago.

“She’s a newborn and normal size!” Remini said.

Like Tom Cruise, Remini is a member of the Church of Scientology.

Even though they had a very public courtship, Cruise and Holmes have not presented their baby in public and so far haven’t inked a deal with a magazine for exclusive photos of the baby.

Conspiracy theories abound in the tabloid press and on blogs about why baby Suri hasn’t been seen. Some even speculate that the baby doesn’t exist at all, while others point out that Tom Cruise also kept his two adopted children, Isabella, 13, and Connor, 11, out of the public eye when they were little.

As for Suri, a family friend described the baby as “a cross between the two – [with] dark, straight hair and dark eyes.”

Yeah, so we’ll take your word for it, Leah Remini, even though Suri or a bundle resembling an infant has never been photographed despite hoards of paparrazi trailing the Holmes-Cruise family for the past three months. The infant also hasn’t been seen by non-Scientology celebrities since it was said to be born three months ago, and the “birth certificate” is suspect.

There’s a far-away blurry picture of Katie Holmes holding a tow-headed baby, but that’s probably a fake. There’s also a far-away picture of what looks like a baby carriage, but it could be a prop or something else entirely.

None of Katie’s family has seen the baby according to reports, but Katie was said to have visited them in Ohio at the end of May - and to have brought Suri with her! WTF is going on?!

Katie was spotted back in LA visiting her favorite overpriced store, Barneys. As one commentor on x17 points out, she didn’t buy any baby items. I always get something for my son when I’m shopping.

The bloggers always uncover stories before the mainstream press does, and this is no exception. It’s not as important as a lack of WMD in Iraq, but it’s just as obvious.

Header image from Pink is the New Blog. Other images from x17online.

Posted in Babies, Katie Holmes, Photos, Scandals, Tom Cruise, TomKat

Written by Celebitchy         1 Comment »
Jul 17
'06
Katie Holmes denies second pregnancy


A “neighbor” of Katie Holmes was quoted speculating that she’s pregnant again, but we highly doubt it. It would be difficult to get visibly pregnant so soon after the supposed birth of her last child.

Media and fans have been kept on their toes ever since the former ‘Dawson’s Creek’ actress gave birth to Suri in April, as she has rarely been seen in public since then. Experts suspect the star has been hiding away because she is with child once again, and her neighbor seems to agree.

Katie’s neighbor revealed to US Weekly, “I heard from a lot of people that Katie is pregnant.”

But while the soon-to-be-married star was visiting Cruise’s Holiday home on Monday in Telluride, Colorado, she wasted no time slamming the rumors.

Holmes insisted to US Weekly, “I am not pregnant again.”

Meanwhile, Katie enjoyed a portion of her stay in Colorado with one of her girlfriends, where they drank coffee and ‘window shopped’.

But of course the new mom was without her baby girl once again, which has proven discouraging to her fans.

Holmes then told a horde of onlookers, “Suri’s doing great! She’s back at the house.”

About a month ago, some random person claimed to have seen a baby-like bundle from afar that might have been Suri. Now that Tom and Katie are in Telluride, Colorado, a store clerk says that they’ve actually seen Suri and she’s “funny looking.” If Suri were out in public, why aren’t there paparrazi photos of it? Isn’t Telluride a haven for the rich and famous? There must be photographers there.

A few eyewitness claim they even had a glimpse of mysterious Suri, as Katie Holmes engaged in an invigorating trek in the woods.

A waitress gushed, “She exists! I saw her thick black hair.”

The magazine quotes locals as saying Suri has “small hands” and is “funny-looking.”

A large percentage of people have camera phones and I know I carry a digital camera around with me all the time. Why aren’t there any pictures of Suri if “eyewitnesses” actually saw her. The first picture of Violet Affleck was a blurry cameraphone photo that everyone posted right away. This is bullshit - no one saw that baby. Read TMZ’s conspiracy timeline - it’s rather convincing.

There’s a tell-all book about Tom Cruise coming out by Princess Diana’s biographer, Andrew Morton. He’s done a lot of research, but there’s no word as to when it will be published. You know it will contain a bunch of shocking revelations about the pint-sized cult spokesperson.

Meanwhile Tom and Katie also had a bag of groceries and a bunch of cherry soda delivered by private jet from Hollywood to Telluride. Their consumables travel better than I do.

Here is Tom Cruise presenting Steven Spielberg with the Golden Hugo award at the Chicago Film Festival this Saturday. [via] They supposedly had a falling out after Cruise talked too much Scientology crap during promotion for “War of the Worlds,” and it’s clearly important to Tom that he put those rumors to rest. He doesn’t seem to care that people think his baby is fake, though.

Posted in Babies, Katie Holmes, Scandals, Tom Cruise, TomKat

Written by Celebitchy         1 Comment »
Jul 12
'06
Was Suri damaged by too many powerful sonograms?


My two-year old son has very weak front teeth with some visible plaque and chipping. It’s not decay and he rarely drinks juice or eats sugary food. My husband and I consulted dentists in Germany and the US and they both said that his teeth never calcified properly while he was in utero and that it was most likely the result of something that happened in the fourth or fifth month of pregnancy when the buds were forming, probably an illness I had.

When I was five months’ pregnant I rushed over to a 3D ultrasound place to learn my baby’s sex a couple of weeks before my OBGyn was able to schedule the regular sonogram. We got a little DVD set to music and phenomenal pictures in which you can really see his features. My husband says there’s nothing to feel guilty about but I keep wondering if that powerful sonogram damaged my son’s budding teeth, and I would never have one again. That’s the only thing I can remember happening during that time of my pregnancy.

Thanks for reading my rambling story, but the moral is that ultrasounds can damage tiny fetuses in unpredictable ways, and there’s almost no way to tell if a birth defect or small change in a baby is due to an ultrasound. Doctors say they’re safe, but are cautious to recommend that they’re used sparingly. I’ve been thinking about the mystery of Suri, and remembered how Tom bought an ultrasound machine and was talking about how much he loved checking out his unborn child. People really criticized him for it at the time:

An ultrasound machine works by sending vibrations into the body and then waiting for them to bounce back. The machine can use information from the echoes to produce a moving image of a fetus. But not all of the energy that goes into the body comes back out—some gets absorbed in the tissues. This can cause cells to heat up, or it can make trapped gas bubble up. Studies of ultrasound in lab animals have shown that heat and bubble formation (or “cavitation”) can damage internal organs.

Few studies of ultrasound have been conducted on the human fetus (for ethical and logistical reasons), and there’s no smoking gun to suggest that the machines are causing harm. We’ve known for a long time that ultrasound heats up human tissue—that’s the rationale for its application in physical therapy. Several experiments conducted overseas have shown an increase in left-handedness (or at least a reduction in right-handedness) among those exposed to prenatal ultrasound, which suggests that the test could have neurological effects…

Is Tom Cruise putting his baby—or his fiancee—at risk? It depends on what kind of machine he’s using, and whether he’s got a trained sonographer to help him out. He may have a machine that doesn’t have the more dangerous high-power settings.

The article goes on to say that cumulative sonograms aren’t necessarily more damaging than individual sonograms.

There are studies showing ultrasounds are relatively safe, and that there is no connection between prenatal ultrasounds and birth defects. These studies are using old technology, though, and Tom undoubtedly had a 3D ultrasound for Katie’s pregnancy:

In addition, [Kjell Salvesen of the University of Trondheim, Norway] notes that the ultrasound machines used in his study [published in The Lancet, showing ultrasounds are not damaging] are now becoming obsolete, with many hospitals relying on higher-energy devices that produce sharper images. “The technology is rapidly developing, and these safety studies will always come 10 years after the devices have been taken into general use,” he says.

No one can say with certainty that the higher-energy ultrasonic devices cannot harm a fetus, says Vorhees. Heat isn’t the only way in which ultrasound might theoretically damage tissues, he adds. Sound waves may cause microscopic bubbles in body fluids to oscillate and sometimes collapse, Vorhees says. Scientists don’t know whether such problems can injure the fetus.

The scientific uncertainty over ultrasound led the Food and Drug Administration to advise against sonograms during pregnancy unless there is a problem such as bleeding, a family history of birth defects, or some other medical reason for the procedure, including advanced maternal age. FDA specifically warns against using ultrasound “frivolously” — simply to watch the baby float in the womb or to learn the baby’s sex.

Now that Suri hasn’t emerged, and her “birth certificate” is highly suspect, one wonders just exactly what is going on. She may not exist, she may be under Scientology house arrest, or she may have a disorder or delay of unknown origin. You know that Cruise got one of those 3D machines because he’s rich as anything and wouldn’t just buy a regular old model. I really suspect that my son’s teeth were damaged by one and wonder if little Suri suffered any ill effects from Tom’s crazy curiosity.


Katie Holmes is quoted in the upcoming Us Weekly saying that “Suri’s doing great!” but some quote from Katie or her publicist isn’t reassuring at this point.

The Toronto Fashion Monitor says that little Suri could be being raised under strict Scientolgy “no noise” conditions, in which little children are shielded from noise coupled with bad experiences because it can create a bad memory they call an “engram.”

Scientologists don’t believe in comforting hurt little children, either. They think that if they stumble and hit their head on a rock, for instance, they should be made to lay their head back on the rock so that the bad energy and pain will flow back into it.

Even if “Suri” or a baby facsimile emerges at this point, I’m never going to believe that she’s the product of Katie and Tom. Something highly suspect is going on, although I hope I’m not right that the baby does exist and is suffering from a defect or illness.

Posted in Babies, Cults, Katie Holmes, Scandals, Tom Cruise, TomKat

Written by Celebitchy         See post for comments
Jul 6
'06
NO ONE has seen Suri Cruise


This baby just does not exist or something is wrong with it. People claim that Cruise is holding Suri back because of his wacko cult religion, Scientology, or because he didn’t get enough cash for the photos, but there hasn’t even been a bundle photographed. Now his celebrity friends claim to have never seen the mystery spawn, either:

BABY Suri Cruise isn’t just playing hide-and-seek with the public. Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes have yet to show off their spawn to fellow Scientologists John Travolta, Kelly Preston and Lisa Marie Presley. Even good pals Will and Jada Pinkett Smith supposedly have not met the newborn despite repeated calls to Cruise, reports Us Weekly. “Every time, it’s a different excuse: He’s busy or Kate’s not feeling well,” said a source. “[The Smiths] think it’s so weird.”

Even if they wanted to shield the baby from the negative influence of the media or whatever, we still would have seen Katie or a nanny/Scientology handler out walking with a stroller or holding a covered bundle.

Katie even went to her parent’s house in Ohio at the end of May, and there were no photographs of the supposed baby.

All we have to vouch for Suri’s existence is a report from an “eyewitness” who saw a bundle from very far away.

Readers of Celebrity Baby Blog came up with several plausible theories to explain the Suri mystery:

  • that the pregnancy was faked and Suri was adopted

  • that Katie was pregnant before she and Tom hooked up, and that she gave birth earlier and the latter part of the pregnancy was faked
  • that though she conceived while with Tom, he is not the genetic father and Suri looks nothing like him
  • that Suri has some kind of unattractive physical attribute that Tom and/or Katie do not want made public
  • that Tom has paid off the paparazzi not to take her photo
  • that Suri has not yet been outside of Tom’s estate (the most likely reason in my opinion), with some people thinking that Child Protective Services should be called (!!!)
  • WTF is going on? They better procure a baby that sort of looks like them fast, because this is turning into one of the biggest Hollywood scandals ever.

    Header image is an original illustration by the Grumpy Old Indian Man. Images of Tom Cruise from late June. [via]

    Posted in Babies, Cults, Katie Holmes, Scandals, Tom Cruise, TomKat

    Written by Celebitchy         7 Comments »
    Jul 3
    '06
    Nicole Kidman did invite Tom Cruise to her wedding


    Australian gossip rags are reporting that Nicole Kidman did invite her ex, Tom Cruise, to her wedding with Keith Urban last weekend. He didn’t attend, but sent his regards. His two adopted children with Kidman did attend:

    The 39-year-old star apparently invited Tom and present squeeze Katie Holmes – who have a daughter Suri - to the wedding in her native Sydney, Australia.

    Oz tabloids claim to have seen copies of the invite, which would have followed the correct wedding/ex-partner etiquette if Cruise and Holmes were unavailable to attend.

    While Cruise and Kidman’s adopted children from their marriage, Isabelle and Connor, were both at last Sunday’s ceremony, the Mission: Impossible star was nowhere to be seen, but a source told the Sunday Mirror that the actor sent his best wishes instead.

    “Tom wished Nicole all the best and was pleased all the troubles between them were over. He also said how much he hoped she finds joy,” a friend told the paper.

    Earlier reports that Tom sent Nicole a picture of Suri for her 39th birthday with the message “a very nappy birthday” were false, and were undoubtedly made up in England, where most of the fake gossip originates and nappy is a common colloquialism for diaper. Nicole was also said to have wished “mother and baby well” after the birth of Suri, but that turned out to be made up, too. It could be true that Tom sent his regards after the wedding, but we’ll probably never know.

    Nicole and Keith are back in Nashville after departing their honeymoon in Tahiti on Saturday. They left at night to avoid photographers, and boarded a jetboat to a chartered flight, which took them to the Island nation’s capital, where they caught a private jet home. Their honeymoon was probably not as peaceful as they were hoping, considering that Eva Longoria and Tony Parker crashed their resort.

    Nicole is no longer on pregnancy watch after she was photographed looking super-fit in a bikini. Both she and Keith are headed back to work:

    The Oscar-winning actress, who is rarely seen in anything revealing, was photographed in a turquoise and white bikini showing off an amazingly toned abdomen, putting to rest any rumours she was pregnant.

    The celebrity couple are set to get straight back to work - Urban kicks off the first show of his tour in Ontario, Canada on July 13 and Kidman is due to start filming her next movie, The Lady From Shanghai.

    Here are lower resolution pictures of Nicole and Keith on their honeymoon, and some higher resolution candids of them back in Nashville. [via]

    Posted in Fake News, Keith Urban, Nicole Kidman, Photos, Tom Cruise, Weddings

    Written by Celebitchy         See post for comments
    Jun 20
    '06
    Something must be wrong with Suri Cruise


    Suri Cruise was born three months ago and there’s not even a single picture of the tot covered up. She must have a vitamin D deficiency because considering all the paparrazi that follow Cruise and Holmes around she surely hasn’t seen the light of day.

    Ted Casablanca of E! Online is saying that Tom and Katie are never going to get married and that the wedding plans are indefinitely on hold.

    Defamer has a report from an eyewitness that observed a small baby-like bundle from afar that could have been Suri:

    Tom brought the Miracle Baby over to the Amblin compound a couple of Fridays ago to take pictures of the baby with Steven Spielberg. Tom brought two giant black SUVs, a couple of REALLY large bodyguards, Katie, and the baby. I saw it (the M.B.) only from afar, but it looks like a regular baby.

    This is the first “eyewitness” report we’ve had on this baby, and it’s less than credible. We will sort of believe that the baby exits when we see it, but too much time has passed and we’re going to buy into one of the “conspiracy” theories soon. (It’s not a conspiracy if it’s true!)

    Scientology has brainwashed Tom into thinking any kind of publicity for himself is good, but that his little baby, who would soften public opinion of him if she actually exists and is photographed, should be shielded from public view. They’re trying to keep him down and it’s working.

    Here is Tom at a photocall in Tokyo for Mission Impossible III. Director JJ Abrams, Maggie Q, Tom Cruise, Keri Russell and producer Paula Wagner are also shown.

    Posted in Babies, Katie Holmes, Tom Cruise

    Written by Celebitchy         11 Comments »
    Jun 13
    '06
    Tom Cruise tries to convert Angelina Jolie to Scientology


    Tom Cruise called Angelina Jolie while she was still in Namibia to congratulate her on the birth of Shiloh Nouvel, but he soon tried to sneak his creepy cult Scientology into the conversation - by asking Jolie to pick up an “award” for her charity work from the Celebrity Scientology Center in Hollywood:

    Cruise phoned up Brad Pitt and Jolie while the couple was in Africa to congratulate them both on the birth of their baby, but it wasn’t long before Cruise the persistent missionary man began using his long distance minutes for Scientology.

    The man once touted as the “world’s greatest movie star,” but now not selling so good, reportedly urged Jolie to stop by Scientology HQ to pick up an award for her charity work.

    But the former Tomb Raider made it clear that wasn’t an artifact she was interested in.

    Rick Ross of CultNews.com points out that Cruise forgot that Jolie’s significant other has a lot of experience with the cult. Brad Pitt reportedly dumped idiot Juliette Lewis back in the early 90s due to her involvement with Scientology.

    Now that the details of the prenup between Tom and Katie have been worked out, Katie’s parents are reportedly anxious for her to marry Tom and get her hands on the dough. She stands to make $3 million for every year she’s marrie to the crazy half-pint, with a $33 million cap on her divorce settlement. If she leaves Tom now, she could lose custody of the supposed baby, according to an “insider,” but if she marries him she stands to get some cash and has a better chance at keeping Suri.

    Where the hell is Suri, anyway?!

    The header image was taken during in Aberdeen during promotion for MI3. [via]

    Posted in Angelina Jolie, Cults, Tom Cruise

    Written by Celebitchy         2 Comments »
    Jun 6
    '06
    Katie Holmes doesn’t get much time with Suri


    There’s a report in Life and Style that Tom Cruise is upsetting Katie by putting baby Suri on a “Baby Einstein” regimen geared toward helping the newborn infant become a genius. “Baby Einstein” is based on psuedo science and isn’t effective, but Tom Cruise believes that vitamins can cure depression so it’s understandable that he would fall for their marketing.

    What’s most telling about the article is the fact that Tom is dictating the care of the baby and Katie’s time with Suri is limited:

    The friend also tells the magazine the battle has spread to the infant’s toys which reportedly have now been shoved into a corner to make room for pile of the “genius” toys.

    The friend also details - according to the report - that Katie believes this may be pushing the two-month old infant too far and Tom may be expecting too much.

    “Just when Katie thought things were settling down, now she has to deal with flashcards and DVDs,” the friend tells L&S.

    “Her quiet time with Suri has been reduced to only a brief period before bedtime.”

    Babies learn by interacting with others. “Baby Einstein” offers a decent collection of DVDs to pop in if you need to take a shower or get a break from your baby, but they are not educational, according to most experts. Poor Suri and Katie need to spend time together playing and relaxing, but if this is true Tom is imposing his manic over-the-top expectations on his tiny newborn.

    This may be made up, though. People seem to like to invent stories that make Tom seem like the Napoleon character he comes off as in interviews.

    Suri may be made up too. We haven’t seen pictures of her yet, and the paparazzi hasn’t managed to score a single candid - even far-off - of the newborn. Katie Holmes was said to have brought Suri to Ohio with her to visit her family. If that’s true, she must have brought the Scientology security force along too, because resourceful photographers didn’t get a single snap. We’ve already seen Kingston Rossdale wrapped up leaving the hospital, and Shiloh’s pictures are coming out in People soon. What the hell is going on with Suri?

    Our readers think the Scientologists are holding back pictures and media coverage of the little one due to their arbitraty belief system, and that may be true. No Scientologist “friends” of Cruise, like Kirstie Alley, John Travolta or Kelly Preston have visited the newborn or vouched for her existence. We just wonder if she’s real.

    Posted in Babies, Cults, Tom Cruise

    Written by Celebitchy         See post for comments
    May 24
    '06
    Katie Holmes goes home to mom and dad - without Tom Cruise


    Katie Holmes has left Hollywood for the sanity and security of her parent’s home in Ohio. She brought baby Suri with her, and left controlling Tom at home. Sources say she had a huge blowout with Tom and is relieved to be rid of him:

    Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes reportedly got into a big fight — that ended with Holmes deciding to take baby Suri to Ohio to introduce the two-month-old to family and friends. Tom, who is rumored to have a rocky relationship with Holmes’ parents, won’t be joining them, according to Life & Style Weekly

    “He told Katie he wasn’t going, considering the bad relations between him and her family,” an “insider” told the mag. “Katie was really happy he said that, because she’d been afraid to admit to him that she didn’t want him to go.”

    The couple allegedly had a “huge argument” which ended with Katie declaring, “I’m doing this and you can’t stop me.” Her rep denies the story.

    Cruise reportedly decided to fly his fiancée and tot to Toledo, drop them off and fly back to pick them up.

    The episode, however, may be giving Holmes second thoughts. A “confidant” of hers told the mag: “Katie’s very unhappy and beginning to realize she may have made a major mistake being with Tom.”

    We do not like Tom and are not defending him - but it was nice of him to fly Katie to see her parents even if he’s too stubborn to go too. Hopefully Katie’s family will talk some sense into her and help her escape controlling Tom and the Scientologist handlers. Yesterday’s report that Tom won’t marry Katie until she’s fully brainwashed by Scientologists may simply mean that Katie has real misgivings about the relationship and isn’t ready to hand over her life and will to a crazy cult.

    As an aside - wouldn’t it be great if the first pictures published of Suri are paparrazi photos taken in Ohio? That would really rock.

    Posted in Babies, Cults, Katie Holmes, Relationship trouble, Tom Cruise, TomKat

    Written by Celebitchy         4 Comments »
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