The internet, particularly in the age of Wikileaks, has worked an enormous amount of damage upon the “Church” of Scientology, and many of us wonder why certain celebrities (i.e., Tom Cruise, John Travolta, and their wives) choose to stay. Naturally, part of the problem is that the cult has gathered far too many “damaging” secrets through its extensive auditing process of the celebrities in question, and they worry that their careers would be sabotages if this information should (and it would) be leaked by the CO$. Also, I figure that these celebs must have preemptively decided to turn a blind eye to any and all injustices that have been revealed by former members (if you’re not familiar, Ex-Scientology Kids is a great place to start). They just figure that things are great for them, so why rock the proverbial boat? Katie Holmes, especially, is not about to rock that boat. Not only would doing so endanger her astronomical clothing budget, but she’s at least smart enough to see what happened to Nicole after she and Tom divorced. After a number of years of marriage, Nicole resisted Scientology and, as a suppressive person, the church would never allow Nicole to be near her adoptive children again. When was the last time that you saw Nicole photographed with either Connor or Isabella? Exactly.

This week’s issue of In Touch magazine reveals that Katie’s life is one of constant surveillance and control from spies in the CO$. Most of the information comes from a new book, Inside Scientology: The Story of America’s Most Secretive Religion, by Janet Reitman. While the stuff about unpaid labor and Katie’s “wife audition” is nothing new, there’s an interesting claim that Katie and Tom are largely ignorant of the scheme that’s been put in place to keep them line. Would you welcome the CO$ into your lives and even into your bedroom? It seems that the Cruises have done just that:

When Katie Holmes married Tom Cruise in 2006, it almost seemed like a fairy tale come true, from the custom-made gown to the man of her dreams waiting at the altar. But five years later, a new book suggests that the reality of her life is much different than she could have ever imagined. According to the book, Tom’s involvement with Scientology has ensnared his family in a weird world of spying, control, and some claim, even unpaid labor.

And now, these allegations are being exposed in a new book, Inside Scientology, by Janet Reitman. “Church leaders see Tom as a cash cow,” Reitman tells In Touch. So, she says, they do everything possible to ensure that he and Katie never leave the church — and never spill its secrets.

From its very beginnings, Reitman says, Tom and Katie’s relationship has been carefully engineered by Scientologists, although the couple’s rep denies the claims. When Tom and Nicole Kidman divorced, Reitman writes, curch staffers began a campaign to find him a new wife who could attract younger would-be Scientologists. “My source Marc Headly saw viedo tryouts of a number of actresses who were being auditioned to be an appropriate girlfriend for Tom,” Reitman reveals. He claimed several actresses were interviewed — but Katie was the only one who wanted Tom.

According to the book, Katie, 32, has played the part of a dutiful wife ever since. And she has to, since Scientology handlers reportedly watch her every move. “Any conversation you’d have with the star, anything you did with him, what the star read, watched, who he talked to, what he was hearing,” all would be reported to the church, former Scientology official Karen Pressley tells Reitman, meaning no aspect of Tom and Katie’s life is secret, and every aspect must be in line with Scientology rules.

The payoff? The book claims that Tom, 49, gets to use unpaid Scientology members as personal servants for him, Katie and their daughter, Suri, 5. Over the years, Reitman writes, he has had church staffers remodel his condo, build tennis courts for him, landscape his property nad more — without paying a penny. In short, the book suggest Katie’s entire life is a Scientology production, whether she realizes it or not. As former Scientologist Nancy Many tells Reitman, Tom and Katie “are completely ignorant of the strategy that has been put in place to hook and control them.” If that’s true, will the book finally open their eyes?

[From In Touch, print edition, August 22, 2010]

I haven’t read this book yet, but it’s on my Kindle wish list, so it’ll happen at some point. One book that I will heartily recommend on the same topic is My Billion Year Contract: Memoir of a Former Scientologist by former CO$ slave Nancy Many. If you read the Amazon synopsis and reviews, it’s clear that many other former Scientologists have found support and encouragement from the book by realizing that they’re not alone in their struggles to regain some sense of personal identity after breaking free from the cult. For “civilians” who choose to leave, the CO$ turns them loose without anything — no money, no friends, no family — and often with a large debt hanging over their heads for the so-called “free” audits they received while serving the church as employees.

Meanwhile, Reitman’s book will undoubtedly open some new sets of eyes even though, at this point, it’s almost common knowledge that Katie and Tom only employ fellow Scientologists in their household. Katie’s assistants? Scientologists. The couple’s bodyguards? Scientologists.

Photos courtesy of Fame

Have I mentioned before how worried I am about Mission: Impossible: Ghost Protocol? I’m worried that it’s going to suck, sure, but I’m also worried that it won’t actually be bad and that Jeremy Renner will have to come back and play second fiddle to Tom Cruise again. If I see this movie at all, it will be for Renner. Anyway, above is a new, just-released promotional image from the film. Ordinarily, I would only fill up an entire post with my musings on a promotional image if that image involved Michael Fassbender and some kind of sex act. But after I stared at this photo for a full minute, I finally put my finger on what was bothering me.

Tom is no longer an A-list movie star. That ship has sailed, but Tom still has enough friends in the industry that he’s allowed to keep working on big projects. Sure, he’s been given higher-profile costars (like Cameron Diaz in Knight & Day, and Renner in this film), but the bulk of these films still rest on Tom. It’s like Hollywood is giving him enough rope to hang himself, and he keeps bombing, and Hollywood keeps trying.

Why do I bring this up? This promotional image has come out AFTER the first trailer was released, and I‘m struggling to understand why, what purpose this image has other than inducing eye-rolls. My guess is that this image was a contender for the poster, and might still be in contention for a poster. Look at how ridiculous the image is – the cartoon-like flames behind Tom, the surreal, Photoshopped quality to his face, the shadowy, smoky lighting that is aiming for “evocative” and ends up being “a Xenu fog”.

So, now that I’ve nit-picked for too long, let me tell you what’s bothering me: this film should not be about Tom Cruise/Ethan Hunt. The deal was originally that Jeremy Renner was being brought in to take over the MI franchise, if this film went well. Instead of putting Jeremy front and center in the trailer and promotional images thus far, it looks like Hollywood is once again going to make this about Tom and whether he’s still a movie star. Dear Hollywood: He’s not a movie star anymore. Bring on Renner.

Crap. I forgot about Josh Holloway. Sh-t, I’m so seeing this movie, Xenu or no Xenu.

Photos courtesy of WENN.

Yesterday, as I was covering the new photos of Tom Cruise, Katie Holmes and Suri, I was wondering why the family was in LA when it seemed like Tom was having the time of his life down in Miami (Those poor Miami hustlers – I bet they got audited. HARD.). Sure, Tom took Katie out for a “date night” Katy Perry concert (in which Katie wore one of the worst dong-repellent ensembles ever), but surely they didn’t go to LA just for a concert? Yeah, they totally did. Because yesterday, the Cruise-Holmes clan flew to NYC for Katie’s premiere. Her film Don’t Be Afraid of the Dark had it’s big red carpet premiere last night, and these are the photos. Note: Katie seems to have walked the red carpet by herself, but Tom was definitely there, and the paparazzi got lots of photos of the two of them after the premiere.

As for Katie’s style… I don’t hate the dress. It’s not the best thing ever, but it’s cute enough, especially when she pairs it with the grey cardigan. Guess who did the dress? KATIE! The dress is Holmes & Yang! It’s always funny to me that Katie fronts like she’s the second coming of Ralph Lauren when the Holmes & Yang line looks so budget. As I said, this dress is cute and everything, but if you were going to design something cute for your own premiere, why do a simple LBD?

What I do like about Katie’s premiere look: her hair looks good. I think she’s just decided to copy whatever Kate Middleton has done. And Katie’s makeup looks decent too. It’s funny, though – she looks alert and sober on the red carpet, but as soon as she’s holding hands with Tom, it’s like she becomes instantly zonked. Tom looked kind of weird last night too. What’s going on with him? His hair looks limp, he didn’t take his sunglasses off, and he didn’t walk the carpet with Katie. Is anyone else worried?

Photos courtesy of WENN & Fame.

These are photos of Tom Cruise, Katie Holmes and Suri from their big weekend in LA. The night photos – of just Tom and Katie – are from last night, where Tom took his girl to a Katy Perry concert, like every 50-year-old husband does…? Girl, get it together! KATY PERRY?!? I don’t know which one to mock more, Katie or Tom. At best, Katie loves Katy Perry, and Katie chose this concert as their date night, and Tom was just making his girl happy. At worst, Tom was like, “Gurl, we need to see Katy shake that ass!” and Katie sighed and asked for another credit card.

Should we even talk about Katie’s concert ensemble? That outfit is like dong repellent. Tom is all, “Bitch, I wasn’t even going near it anyway!” Also: Katie just looks high as hell whenever she’s around Tom these days. Does she have it on a schedule? Like, “Take Quaaludes at 8 p.m., Concert with Tom, 9 p.m.” Oh, and Connor is with them! Dude.

Before the concert, on Saturday, Katie had an outing with Suri and Suri’s little doll. I love the look of concentration on Suri’s face, like she’s two seconds away from bitching out the paparazzi for photographing her doll. “PRIVACY!” Suri would yell. As for Katie’s ensemble here… well, it’s not good. I thought Katie’s style was finally improving after she began making some pretty good choices in jeans and styling. But she’s relapsed! And she’s also wearing that fug hat that Tom was wearing for months.

Photos courtesy of Fame & Pacific Coast News.

I don’t even know how to describe what’s going down in these photos. Fame Pictures describes it as, “While on the balcony of his SoHo hotel room in Miami, Florida, the ever charismatic “Rock of Ages” star, Tom Cruise, gives the crowd below a little taste of the upcoming film as he gives a shirtless demonstration of his ability to ‘rock out’ with a microphone on July 16th, 2011.” So this is Tom Cruise, “rocking out” and/or advertising his rock-star O-face for the Miami hustlers? I know everyone is going to yell at me about Tom being an evil, auditing brain-washer who married a robot and raises his kids in a destructive cult, but I honestly feel bad for Tom. It’s flat-out pity at this point. He’s trying so hard, and he just reeks of… desperation. I guess I feel pity because I’m old enough to remember a time when Tom could do no wrong, when he was the #1 Box Office Star, Ever, when he wasn’t reeking of desperation. Cringe through more photos of Tom’s unhinged “Rock Out” face:

And what does Katie think of this? REBOOT. REBOOT.

If all of that wasn’t gross and sad enough, Tom also went for a pool dip with his girls. He left his hat on, because…? Because he’s balding? Because Xenu gave him a toupee? Because it’s his new thing? Because he’s constantly thinking about The Full Monty? I still find his happy trail/L.Ron Trail so, so disturbing. It wasn’t always like that, right? It wasn’t always just that random tuft of damp, wiry hair, glistening in the sunlight? *vom*

Photos courtesy of Fame.

The past few years of Tom Cruise’s movie-star existence has been many things but can easily be summarized as a case of trying too hard. He tries too hard to impress. He tries too hard to be taken seriously. And he tries too hard to convince us that he’s a good four inches taller than his true height when it really shouldn’t matter at all. Now In Touch brings us a story from the set of Rock of Ages, where Tom is (naturally) trying too hard to convince the younguns that he’s just as cool as they are. Unfortunately for Tom, they’re all rather preoccupied with laughing at his rock star lifts and various other ways that he’s coming on too strong:

Top Gun? Try Top Grandpa! Yep, that’s what Tom Cruise’s younger castmates are calling the 49-year-old star on the set of Rock of Ages, where he is embarrassing himself by dressing like a teenager and trying to seem relevant, an on-set source says. While the once super-hot actor has been trying to get close to the cast and crew by introducing them to up-and-coming bands like Bon Iver and Odd Future, they’re too busy making fun of him behind his back to be impressed by his efforts, the source adds. Anyone who has seen Tom dance on BET’s “106 & Park” will have little trouble imagining his sad-but-valiant attempt to “connect” with the kiddies!

[From In Touch, print edition, July 25]

If you’re unfamiliar with the above-referenced BET dance of doom, here’s a bit of a refresher:

Poor Tom. If the guy just feigned a reclusive, enigmatic presence and hid out in his trailer, people would probably flock to him. Unfortunately, Tom is not capable of merely doing so, and he must actively seek out acceptance, which is an admittedly sad situation. Yes, Tom Cruise is hovering on the brink of a mid-life crisis of sorts, and he desperately wants to prove that he’s still the biggest movie star in the world, which he obviously hasn’t been for several years. Added into the mix of Tom’s life cycle are a few key complications: (1) The bubble of celebrity wherein he has resided for multiple decades; and (2) The insanity known as the Church of Scientology. Obviously, Tom’s not in touch with reality and hasn’t been for quite some time (if ever); so at this stage, it’s almost painful to watch him try to endear himself not only to younger audiences but also, if this tabloid article is to be believed, to his younger costars and crew members as well.

Meanwhile, the clock keeps on ticking, as his wife Katie reminded him by throwing him a surprise 49th birthday party at their Miami hotel earlier this month. Here’s a few photos of Tom looking absolutely wiped out on the balcony. Take a nap, Tom!

Photos courtesy of Fame Pictures

I hope this story is true, but it looks like Tom Cruise’s people have already denied it. Still… that doesn’t mean much, and I think it’s perfectly possible that this is on. According to In Touch Weekly, Tom Cruise has made arrangements for his daughter Suri to take a small role (it might be a cameo) in the movie he’s currently filming, Rock of Ages. That’s the one where Tom is wearing his rock n’ roll high heels and he put something on his L. Ron happy trail to make the little hairs glisten (don’t ask). The crux of the story: Suri was the one to decide that she was ready to work in movies!

A star is born: Little Suri Cruise is getting ready to make her big-screen debut in her father Tom’s movie, Rock of Ages, and according to a family friend, she’s hoping it will launch her film career!

The 5-year-old looks up to her star parents, Tom and Katie Holmes, and she wants to be just like them.

“Even though she’s only a kid,” the friend explains, “Suri gets to make her own decisions, and this was one of them. Tom and Katie would never push her into doing something she doesn’t want to do.”

Or, it seems, stop her from doing something she already does! And although a rep denies the new role, anyone can tell that Suri knows how to work a camera!

[From In Touch Weekly, print edition]

Who is with me in thinking this story is completely believable? Tom and Katie treat Suri like she’s perfectly capable of making her own life and career choices, and if Suri wants to be in movies, then by Xenu, she’s going to be in movies. Plus, it’s not like she has some grueling schedule or anything. No school, no tutors, maybe she’ll have to push back some audits and barley-water appointments.

ITW also notes that “Suri’s role hasn’t been revealed.” If anything, I bet it’s just a little cameo.

Photos courtesy of Fame & Pacific Coast News.

It’s really no secret that Suri Cruise never hangs out with friends that are her age, for she appears to exclusively enjoy the company of grown ups (sometimes in some very adult-oriented venues). So that hasn’t changed, but while Papa Tom has been butching it up for the Rock of Ages shoot in Miami, Katie and Suri have followed along to the city and largely spent their time together poolside and eating ice cream. Now, In Touch claims that this very ice cream cone was a “guilt gift” from Katie because she feels so bad for her daughter’s friendless plight, and some Miami insiders have expressed their belief that poor Suri is a truly miserable child.

Suri’s Lonely Summer!

As her family moves to Miami while her dad, Tom Cruise, shoots a movie, little Suri trudges through her days — with no friends.

Building sand castles, eating ice cream and playing by the pool, Suri Cruise should be having the summer of her life. But what good is all the fun in the sun when Suri, 5, has no one to play with?

While living in Miami with mom Katie Holmes — as dad Tom Cruise films Rock of Ages there — Suri has been stuck entertaining herself every single day. And despite her parents’ best efforts, it’s obvious she’s unhappy.

“I’ve never seen Suri with any other kids around her,” a Miami local tells In Touch. “She never hanges out with other children her age, ever.” While learning to swim at the posh Continuum condominium complex pool on June 18, Suri was surrounded by stone-faced bodyguards instead of giggling pals.

The next day, she and her parents took a daylong boat trip and she was so exhausted by the grown-up activity that she had to be carried off the ship. “She was completely passed out,” explains an onlooker.

She misses Tom, too.

But besides that outing, Suri hasn’t been able to spend much quality time with her beloved dad, making matters worse. As he throws himself into his role in the musical movie, “Tom is working very long hours,” an insider reveals. “He hardly ever gets breaks, so Suri and Katie have never come to visit the set, as far as anyone knows.”

And though it’s true that Suri is used to the solitary life, one can’t help but wonder if she wishes she had more friends her own age.

“She has the perfect life, but it’s the perfect life for an adult, not a child,” explains a family friend. “She gets everything she wants except the one thing she probably needs — a normal childhood.”

[From In Touch, print edition, July 11,2011]

You know what? Under relatively normal circumstances, I’d probably assume that Suri and her mommy are merely best friends; and it isn’t an uncommon circumstance for a very young only child and her mother to develop an extraordinarily close bond, particularly if the child is an “old soul.” However, this is not an ordinary family by any means, and even if it wasn’t a Hollywood family, Scientology virtually guarantees that Suri will never live a normal life. In fact, the CO$ believes that children are merely smaller adults because they really do have old souls. Like, literally, that’s one of the main tenets of the “religion,” and Katie herself has spoken of what “a very strong woman” that she believed Suri to be even before she was two years old. Still, do I think Suri is a “lonely” child? Probably not at this stage of the game when mini-Louboutins and a $100,000 treehouse are there to fill the void. Give Suri a few years, and she might change her mind. Or maybe not.

Photos courtesy of Fame Pictures

Ah yes, it seems like just yesterday that Tom Cruise and his bizarre, lumpy stomach were waltzing around (repeatedly, no less) with toy guns and glass-cutting hipples in tow on the set of Mission: Impossible – Ghost Protocol, but now we’ve finally received a trailer for the movie. As expected, Cruise performs a lot of running, kicking, and death-defying stunting in this trailer, but it feels a bit odd to watch him doing all of this to the tune of Eminem’s “Won’t Back Down.” Also, I hate to say it (really, I do), but if Cruise were any other existing action star (like, say, Jason Statham), the entire thing wouldn’t seem so ridiculous. The fact of the matter is that, while Cruise had a decent run as super-spy Ethan Hunt in the first three installments of the franchise, his public persona has suffered so much damage that everything that he does nowadays seems like a spoof; and that’s clearly not the vibe that the producers were going for here. Anyway, Jeremy Renner looks great in the trailer, so there’s that, right?

Interestingly enough, Katie Holmes was recently asked for her opinion (as if she’s allowed to form them) on Ghost Protocol, and she describes the movie as “intense.”

MTV News caught up with Cruise’s better half, Katie Holmes, Monday during the press day for Don’t Be Afraid of the Dark, [and] we asked if she’s seen any of the film yet.

“I have. I had an advanced screening,” she said with a laugh, adding that it’s a perk of being married to the film’s star.

As for her thoughts about Cruise’s death-defying stunts in the film, particularly those he performed atop Dubai’s Burj Khalifa (the world’s tallest building), Holmes turned the question over to Guillermo del Toro, who produced Don’t Be Afraid of the Dark.

“What did you think, Guillermo, about the Burj?” she asked him.

“I love it!” he said, at which point they both agreed that Cruise’s stunts were scarier than their film, which revolves around the demonic activities of a group of terrifying little creatures that seek out and kill humans, particularly children.

“It’s amazing,’ Holmes continued. “The movie is going to be very cool and intense and the best Mission yet.”

The actress also mentioned that she’d be game for a role that required a few crazy stunts herself. “I think it sounds fun,” she said.

[From MTV]

Oh, Katie. So many things spring to mind when botwife is permitted to speak; but it suffices to point out that, when MTV asked her a question that did not result in a pre-rehearsed answer, she had to deflect the unanticipated inquiry towards the person (in this case, Guillermo) sitting next to her. A Scientology richochet, if you will. Also, it’s rather amusing that she still desires an action movie career, since her first “meeting” with Tom Cruise reportedly occurred under the guise of an audition for Mission: Impossible 3 but was truly an “audition” for the role of Mrs. Unhinged, Lift-Wearing Midget. How romantic.

Now and because I know you all asked for it, let’s just revisit Tom and his epic moobs on the set of Ghost Protocol last October and December, shall we?

Tom Cruise butching it up last fall on set courtesy of WENN and Bauer-Griffin.

Here is the first official image of Tom Cruise in Rock of Ages. I’m not even going to try to explain what’s happening here, because honestly, it’s better if you don’t know. I would like to point out a few things here. First: Tom had it written into his contract that his rock star wears lifts, apparently. I love the way the spotlight is actually highlighting the fact that Tom is in high heels, and I can even see where the lift is built into the shoes:

Second interesting thing: whatever is happening on Tom’s torso. As we’ve seen in photos before (last year), Tom likely had some kind of lipo or something, because his stomach is looking kind of wonky. I’m also perturbed at seeing Tom’s hint of “happy trail” (which we should call “the L. Ron trail”). Those hairs above his pelvis are “glistening” to my eyes. And it’s disturbing.

Next story, vaguely related to Tom Cruise: Katie Holmes and Suri are in Miami right now (that‘s where Rock of Ages is filming), and the paparazzi got shots of them playing in the ocean. This is notable because it’s been forever and a day since we’ve seen Katie in a bikini. It’s also notable because this was one of the rare times when Suri was overdressed. She’s at the beach, and instead of putting her in a little swimsuit, Suri played in the ocean in a dress. I don’t get it either. Katie’s figure is pretty nice though. She’s much more toned than I would have thought.

Photos courtesy of Fame and TomCruise.com.