Katie Holmes came to the Los Angeles fan screening of MI3 last night, and she looked gorgeous. She did pair white shoes with a black dress, though. (It’s surprising that she couldn’t find a better pair since she spent all that time shoe shopping in her final days of pregnancy. She must have realized too late that comfort matters.)

In the “this sounds fake to us” department, Katie Holmes was said to be slated for a role as a Bond girl in “Casino Royale” before her pregnancy kept her from taking the part.

Tom appeared on BET Wednesday while in NY promoting MI3. He tried to dance, with humorous results (video below):

Here are Tom and Katie engaging in their trademark public PDA at the MI3 screening:

Tom Cruise had a whirlwind tour of NY yesterday to promote MI3. He rode a firetruck down Broadway in the afternoon, then boarded a helicopter, and finally rode a subway to the premiere. The subway train was rented for $10,000 just for the occasion.

Cruise seemed uncomfortable and made some characteristically strange statements on David Letterman on Tuesday night. He didn’t go into specifics about Katie’s birth and seemed to skirt questions. People has the highlights:

Cruise tries to hide behind a lot of vague adjectives, and reader Millie notes that he acted odd and was uncomfortable with specific questions about the labor. Wonder what that means.

Cruise is also said to be auctioning off the first pictures of Suri to the highest bidder. The photos are said to be worth around $1 million.

Katie Holmes will get a sweet deal if she ever marries and divorces the crazy half pint. She’ll get $14 million according to a new prenup that’s been set up. Even if she remains single, she and Suri will be taken care of with an $8 million trust.

Now that’s not bad compensation for living a lie, is it?

Here’s Cruise in all his glory on his whirlwind tour of Manhattan yesterday.

It came out about two weeks ago that Katie Holmes was following the Buff Brides program to get back in shape. It was said that she met personally with Sue Fleming, the owner of Buff Brides. Sue is a close friend of the family, and we reported that it was not true that Katie had met with her.

Now everyone is up in arms because Tom Cruise is supposedly overseeing Katie’s shape-up plan, but they’re basing that on quotes from Sue Fleming which are false.

Several newspapers are running the same story in which Buff Brides fitness guru Sue Fleming says that Tom managed Katie’s fitness program and that he brought her to tears by saying that he wanted her to be a beautiful bride. We e-mailed with Sue today, and she assured us that she did not say the following:

Maybe another trainer said this, but Sue Fleming did not. Sue’s never even met with Katie Holmes, and these quotes are definitely not from her.

Meanwhile Katie’s dad is said to be quite pissed that Katie is exercising so much, but given the fact that the quotes from Sue Fleming are totally fabricated, it sounds like this is made up too:

Those quotes from Katie’s dad sound fake too, don’t they? Who says things like “I simply can’t go along with what is happening?” In fact this whole story stinks of b.s., but it’s getting carried by plenty of newspapers. People want to believe that Tom is so controlling that he’s telling Katie exactly how to work out.

In one of his creepier quotes, Cruise reveals that he has renamed his girlfriend “Kate” Holmes, because that just sounds more motherly to him:

Sure Holmes decided to change her name, the one she’s been using her entire life and her entire career, just because it sounded better. My name is Katie too, and to me Kate always sounded like a nickname for a younger person. Whatever. Holmes has changed everything else for Cruise, she may as well let him call her what he likes, too.

And Cruise calls her “child-bearing.” That’s very specific, and very strange language that seems to add credence to the rumors that she was inseminated.

In an MTV interview to air Sunday, Cruise says he would give up his achievements for his kids. That doesn’t quite jibe with his actions lately. He also said he would like to star in a film with Katie Kate:

Who says things like “I’m very properly in love?” That’s so strange and seems like an obvious put-on.

Cruise also attended the Paris premiere of MI3 yesterday. Michelle Monaghan attended, but the other big stars from the film were absent. Tom has a new baby at home but he still couldn’t stay away.

Here are pictures from the Paris premiere.

Jamie Foxx took time off from his full schedule of sex to stop by MTV London studios while Tom Cruise was taping an interview to congratulate him on the birth of his baby daughter, Suri. Foxx delivered a pink crib full of Burberry baby accessories to the actor, and gushed about what a nice guy he is:

Tom may not have 95 bodyguards, but he does have an armoured car now. He bought a $180,000 USD armoured vehicle after receiving death threats against him and Katie.

Tom Cruise has joked that he asked Jamie Foxx to be an uncle to Suri:

Tom’s kind of funny, and with all these feel-good stories it’s easy to warm up to the guy. I have to remind myself that he’s touring around Europe while his wife is stuck at home with a new baby and the Scientology freaks, though. Have her parents even come to visit her yet?

There are a few more Cruise stories that we’ll post with the pictures from the MI Paris premiere shortly.

Here is Cruise at the MTV London studios with Jamie Foxx and with his daughter, Isabella. [via] She looks like she really looks up to him. The poor girl.

Star Magazine is reporting that Tom is breaking Katie’s heart by asking her to sign away custody rights to the newborn in case they break up:

That’s scary as hell and maybe Katie will be able to eventually get her old self, and her child – out of that oppressive environment. I can’t imagine my husband asking me to sign away custody rights – right after the baby was born! How evil.

Meanwhile the name the couple picked out of a baby book may not mean what they think it does. According to language experts, the name Suri is totally ironic:

So whenever someone says the name “Suri,” they’re really telling the little girl to go away. That’s what the Scientologists have been doing to the real Katie all along.

Header picture [via]

Update: This is post number 666. Spooky.

Another Update: Reader Carrie, who hooks us up a lot, has pointed out that BabyNames.com lists the origin of “Suri” as Armenian. Carrie writes:

“Wealthy” – that’s accurate.

My aunt is best friends with Sue Fleming, the personal trainer and founder of Buff Brides. Sue has written three books to help brides-to-be and moms shape up: “Buff Brides,” “Buff Moms to Be,” and “Buff Moms.”

That’s why I got all excited when I read in yesterday’s The Sun that Katie Holmes had hired “a personal trainer from BuffBrides.com” to help her get in quick shape for her wedding ceremony. Here’s what The Sun wrote:

There are no lists of personal trainers on Buff Brides.com, so it sounds like Katie has hired Sue Fleming, the owner, herself.

TMZ then runs with this story, stating flat out that Katie has met with Sue:

While Katie may be using the BuffBrides method with her own trainer, she has not met personally with Sue Fleming, and TMZ is mistaken. It seems like they could have simply asked Sue about it if they were able to get her on the phone.

BuffBrides and its companion books are excellent, easy-to-follow programs that you can do at home to get in shape quickly. Katie is sure to be looking great for her summer wedding with Tom Cruise if she faithfully follows the program. You can get the books from Amazon.

Yesterday it was big news that Brooke Shields had her baby right before little Suri supposedly slipped silently out of Katie Holmes. A more incredible detail is the fact that Katie and Brooke gave birth in the same hospital, on the same floor!

Everyone assumed that Katie gave birth at home as planned, but she is said to have snuck out with Tom to go to the hospital. She also chickened out and had an epidural – not that there’s anything wrong with that.

[via]

Shields was famously criticized by Cruise for publically admitting that she used antidepressants to get over a serious bout with postpartum depression. Cruise believes that psychiatric drugs are harmful because of his cult’s stance against their use.

Hopefully the baby was attended to properly and will be cared for by Katie, and not Scientology handlers, for its first three days.

Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes’ long-awaited baby has arrived. “Suri,” a baby girl, was “born” on 3:00 am on Tuesday morning:

Tom said in an interview with Diane Sawyer last week that he and Katie opened the baby name book and that was the first name that popped out at them. It’s not a bad name as far as celebrity child names go. A reader at DListed points out that Suri is an anagram of the middle letters in “Cruise.”

Here are pictures of Cruise in a Spanish-language “Magazine” [via]

Tom Cruise brought his crazy public image to new heights by declaring in his GQ interview that he’s going to eat Katie’s placenta:

He obviously realized how scary he sounded and tried to back down. He’ll have to chow down and leave right afterwards. He plans to promote the hell out of MI3, and will appear next Monday in Rome for the film’s first premiere.

Here’s Katie shopping in Beverly Hills. [via]
Was she impregnated with L. Ron’s sperm?! It seems more likely.