David Blaine held the kick off press conference today at Lincoln Center for his week of living in a snow globe. As if it’s not entertaining enough for us to watch Blaine be a human goldfish for a week, he’ll attempt to escape from a bunch of chains and then try to break the world record for holding his breath:

I really doubt he’ll break the world record for holding your breath underwater. That’s got to be next to impossible fr someone who’s already worn down like that. It would have been good enough if he just lived in the water sphere for a week – he doesn’t have to throw the stupid chain stunt and breath holding into the mix.

So when Blaine dies, whenever it is, his obituary will include the fact that he lived in a coffin for a week, in a see-through box without food for 44 days, and in a water globe for seven days. I would prefer that mine says that I’m survived by my children. Really, the guy is an attention hound and is going to seriously hurt himself.

Paris Hilton is getting paid half a million dollars to host a rock concert this weekend in Austria. I would work 60 hour weeks for two years straight for that kind of money and consider myself lucky as hell.

Her idea of working hard is seriously skewed. Her house is enviable though, of course.

In the pictures of Paris’ Hollywood villa below that were published in Hello Magazine, you can get a sense of the “Old Hollywood” style favored by her interior designer, and see the chandeliers hanging in her closet and over her bed. She also has a huge picture of herself hanging in her lounge.

Among her memorable quotes in the article accompanying the pictures:

For Lindsay Lohan’s sake, we hope she’s talking on the phone through a headset hidden under her hair and not just making adoring faces at herself in her car’s sideview mirror. (If she’s checking herself out while on the phone, that’s somewhat more acceptable since her lips are moving because she’s talking, not from making kissy faces.)

TV viewers don’t love Lohan as much as she loves herself; her last hosting appearance on Saturday Night Live scored a lower Nielsen rating than Jack Black or Steve Martin’s recent hosting gigs. Saturday Night Live is just a show whose time is over, though, and the poor ratings may have more to do with the show’s terrible writing and bad jokes.

There’s a “friend of a friend” type rumor that Lohan was seen shooting smack between her toes at some party. It lists the source a “gawker,” but the article is not on gawker’s website. It seems made up entirely to us.

Here is Lohan looking in her car mirror and walking in Beverly Hills.

Pictures from and [via]

Paris Hilton got all choked up in an interview while describing the earth-shattering experience of opening her closet to a 16 year-old girl in remission from thyroid cancer:

You can watch the video here, and see for yourself when Paris starts to fake cry – right at the point when she’s describing “the look in their eye when you just meet them.” Yes Paris, it’s overwhelming to be so adored. (Paris needs more attention, watch this video of her taking her own picture over and over again.)

Paris opened her heart and her closet to Amber, who was celebrating her 16th birthday the next day, saying things like, “lets find you a hot outfit for your birthday,” “you love it,” and “you like this.”

Later the two went shopping on Rodeo drive. Amber said it was her dream to meet Paris Hilton and she called the day “amazing.”

It is nice of Hilton to volunteer for the Make a Wish foundation, and we’re glad she found someone who can appreciate exactly what she has to offer. [via]