You know when it’s a fabulous time to announce that you want to adopt kids? Right as you’re going through a multiple D.U.I/sex tape scandal. Nothing says “A+ Mom” to potential adoptive parents quite like a lady with a drinking problem. But that’s not stopping Vivica Fox from claiming that she wants to adopt kids. Her reason? If she had a kid naturally and things didn’t work out with the father, the kid would be a constant reminder of the bad relationship. Hey Vivica, thanks for giving all of us children of divorce one more complex.

Kill Bill star Vivica A. Fox is considering adoption because she never wants a child to remind her of a romance gone wrong. The actress, who briefly dated 50 Cent after splitting from husband Christopher Harvest, admits no man has ever convinced her that having a child naturally is worthwhile. Fox says, “I haven’t met anybody that I want to be reminded of. You gotta think about that for 18 years because, more than likely, you, as a woman, you’re gonna be stuck raising the kids. Knowing me, I’d have a baby by somebody I can’t stand and he’d (baby) look just like him (boyfriend). It’d be like, ‘Damn, here you come again today.’

[From Contact Music]

Wow, it’s good to know what my parents see when they look at me. I think if that’s your outlook on children, you probably shouldn’t have them period. Funny thing about children… they’re actually separate, unique people and not simply half you and half the other parent. It’s pretty narcissistic to just see yourself and someone else. And let’s be realistic, you’re not just going to have them around for 18 years, unless you’re a pretty bad parent. If you do it right, you’ll probably see the kid for the rest of your life. I pray pray pray to God that Vivica was trying to be funny when she said this, and it just didn’t come across. It sounds like she’s not really wild about kids… or the inevitable complexities that come with them. Yet Vivica still seems to think she’d be an awesome mom.

So the 43-year-old actress is now considering adopting a baby and becoming a single mum. She adds, “I’ve gotten a little old to be walking around pregnant (but) I’d make a wonderful mom. I’m good with kids. I love kids. It’s just that (pregnancy) hasn’t happened in my life.”

[From Contact Music]

I think her comments perfectly explain why a lot of celebrities don’t seem to make great parents. They just don’t get that it’s about the kids and not all about them. Generally when you see Vivica interviewed, she comes off as kinda crazy anyway. Those are the kind of people that make great aunts, fabulous godmothers, and awesome cousins. But they’re probably best when they’re removed from the kid by at least a few degrees.

Picture note by Jaybird: Here’s Vivica and her infamous boob dent at the Emmys in June. Images thanks to PR Photos.

Julie Christie, who is currently nominated for an Oscar for her role as an Alzheimer’s patient in the film “Away From Her,” has reportedly married her long time partner, journalist Duncan Campbell, in a secret ceremony in India. The couple have been together for 28 years. The Daily Mail reports Julie’s older brother, Clive, confirmed that the couple participated in a ceremony, but didn’t give much more information:

Clive Christie, a retired university lecturer from Aberystwyth, 40 miles from his older sister’s farm in Montgomery, mid-Wales, confirmed yesterday that the wedding had taken place.

Asked whether he attended the event, he replied: “No, we didn’t have any involvement.”

It is not clear what form the marriage took. If it was in a register office, it would be recognised in Britain but a religious ceremony would have no legal effect.

[From The Daily Mail]

Julie is most famous for her roles in “Dr. Zhivago” and “Shampoo,” and is regarded as one of the most beautiful actresses of her generation. She won an Oscar in 1965 for her work in the film “Darling.” She famously dated Warren Beatty in the ‘60s, starring with him in “Shampoo.” Shortly after that relationship went sour, Julie virtually disappeared from the public eye, leaving Hollywood and taking small roles in foreign films or television. Her career started heating up again in 1997’s “Afterglow,” for which she received a Best Actress nomination. Since then, she has appeared in “Troy” (playing Brad Pitt’s mother), “Finding Neverland,” “Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban,” and “The Secret Life of Words.” She is favored to win the Oscar for “Away From Her,” and has already won awards for the role from the Screen Actors’ Guild, BAFTA and the Broadcast Films Critics Association.

Julie has often said that she would never get married, because the ideals of marriage don’t fit in with her “hippie” ideals and free spirited lifestyle. But it seems she’s changed her mind.

Picture note by Celebitchy: Julie Christie is shown at the National Board of Review awards on 1/15/08 in the header image and at the SAG Awards on 1/27/08 below, thanks to PRPhotos.

I really don’t think we have enough animal stories here at Celebitchy. And we definitely don’t have enough “when animals attack” type stories. Now to be fair, we’re a celebrity site. And animals don’t attack celebrities nearly as much as they ought to. So it leaves us searching. But once in a while the stars align just right and a monkey grabs an actress’s left boob. Okay by once in a while I mean once ever. But it’s pretty funny nonetheless. It seems that actress Christina Ricci has a longstanding fear of monkeys. Though to be fair, most people are hideously afraid of monkeys. They’re like spiders and snakes. Wait, that’s backwards. Monkeys are freaking adorable. I wouldn’t want one living in my bathroom or anything, but a monkey as a concept is pretty appealing to me. But Christina Ricci and I don’t share this opinion. It’s one of the many things we’re always fighting about. On the first day of filming for her new movie “Penelope,” Christina got attacked by a monkey. A pervert boob-grabbing monkey.

“I’m afraid of monkeys but I had decided not to be afraid of this monkey because no one else is: ‘Everyone else thinks he’s awesome so just be cool.’ It’s the first day of shooting and I have this kitchen scene where I’m sitting down and the monkey is sitting right next to me. Of course it freaks out during the take and grabs my left breast and will not let go, and he’s so strong. I’m thinking, ‘This thing is gonna rip it’s hand away and I will no longer have a boob there!’

“I’m so freaked out and the whole rest of the actors are turned around so no one sees that this has happened to me and I’m like, ‘Help, help’ as quietly and calmly as possible so this thing does not freak out any further.

“Finally they got him off me but my fear is completely validated and I did not go near him for the rest of the shoot… Monkeys are crazy and you never what they’ll grab onto; I don’t like unpredictable animals.”

[From Starpulse]

Something tells me Chim Chim the monkey doesn’t like you much either, or he wouldn’t have been trying to rip your boob off. In the animal kingdom, boob grabbery is considered the greatest of insults. It’s like giving the finger, except it hurts a lot more. Clearly Chim Chim thought Christina’s face was kina odd looking. But being the gentleman that he is, instead of scratching her eyes out he went for the boob. That’s one classy monkey.

Picture note by Jaybird: Here’s Christina Ricci at the Palazzo Las Vegas Grand Opening on January 17th. No specific photos were available, but her left boob appears to be in good working order. Images thanks to PR Photos.

Matthew McConaughey is known as a pretty free spirit. And part of his free spirit is the apparent belief that deodorant is not a necessity. Matthew claims no one minds and that he has a lovely natural aroma – at least according to his mother. The exception being Kate Hudson. Even though Matthew claims he showers three times a day to keep the stink at bay, Hudson could still smell him, and tried to get him to wear a natural rock salt deodorant to help her out.

We think it’s pretty safe to say that Matthew McConaughey is really one of a kind. As it turns out, two-time co-star Kate Hudson is pretty happy about that. While on the set of their latest joint outing, Fool’s Gold (they also co-starred in How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days back in 2003), the actress begged the shirtless one to scrap his long-standing anti-deodorant policy.

“She always brings a salt rock, which is some natural deodorant, and says, ‘Would you please put this on?’” he said, according to Contactmusic.com. “I just never wore it. No cologne, no deodorant.”

And he hasn’t worn it for more than 20 years. Though Matthew has insisted that the ladies dig it (once saying, “The women in my life, including my mother, have all said, ‘Hey, your natural smell smells, one, like a man, and, two, smells like you,’” which is both obvious and genius on several different levels), Kate, apparently, was an exception. Not that he’s against hygiene. Far from it, as he brushes his teeth at least five times a day and claims, “I take a few [showers] a day.”

[From Page Six]

Matthew McConaughey has got to be pretty down to earth – not only does he not wear deodorant, but he has no problem sharing this story. He did make sure to point out that Kate Hudson was his only co-star to ever bring up his smell. While that’s lovely, something tells me that doesn’t mean McConaughey smells like a baby; it just means Kate Hudson is the only person bold enough to tell McConaughey that he stinks. And I can’t help but doubt all the women who have claimed Matthew smells great. I’m not implying they didn’t say it – I’m just saying they may have had personal reasons for complimenting him.

Picture note by Jaybird: Promotional stills from “Fool’s Gold.” Images thanks to All Movie Photo.

Kate Moss’ five-year-old daughter is apparently getting in the way of Moss’ crazy party lifestyle. So instead of cutting down on the drinking, partying, and (supposedly) sleeping with random men, Moss decided to move her mother Linda into her home. Apparently Kate is hoping that her mother’s presence will be a stable force in her daughter Lila Grace’s life. Because that’s so much easier than actually spending time with your kid and not acting like you’re still 22.

A source said: “Kate wants a more stable home life, and thinks Linda will give her that. She recently turned 34 and wants to tone down the partying lifestyle. She will no doubt find it tough though.

“Linda will be helping to look after Lila Grace, but she will also make sure the new home doesn’t turn into a 24-hour party house, which it is in danger of becoming. She wants to make it a nice home for her granddaughter. The house is being totally renovated at the moment, and Linda has been able to choose how her new room will look. It’s nothing fancy, but she has a massive luxury bathroom all to herself. She has moved all of her stuff into the house and the move will be as permanent as it has to be. Kate’s happy to have her there for as long as she wants.”

[From the Daily Mail]

Well of course Kate’s happy to have her mother there as long as she wants. The phrasing makes it sound like Kate is doing her mother a favor; I’m guessing it’s actually the other way around. I hope Kate is compensating her mother nicely. Or at least getting her some good drugs. That’s probably Kate Moss’ idea of nice compensation. According to the Daily Mail, Kate had several excessively loud late-night parties since moving into her home, and she’s on rather hostile terms with her neighbors, who’ve called the police on her several times. I’m sure the odd dynamic of an able-bodied parent living with her wealthy, partying daughter is unlikely to result in a taming of behavior. It’d be nice if Kate Moss would grow up and be a good influence on her daughter all on her own, but a grandmother is better than nothing.

Picture note by Jaybird: Kate Moss and Kelly Osbourne at the Chanel After Party in Honor of Karl Largerfeld in London on December 5, 2007. Images thanks to PR Photos.

Jamie Foxx will have a reality show on MTV called “From G’s To Gents” [Bossip]
Britney Almost Drives Off A Cliff [Dlisted]
All Your Thetans Are Belong to Us: “Tom Cruise: An Unauthorized Biography” review [Pajiba]
Avril Lavigne bikini pics. Black nail polish and bikinis don’t mix [Celebslam]
10 stinkiest celebs, and what they smell like [Yeeeah!]
Katherine Heigl At Katsuya [I'm Not Obsessed]
Guess Who Bought Starbucks [The Bastardly]
Dr. Phil talks about Britney Spears -again! [In Case You Didn't Know]
CariDee English Does Blackberry (site NSFW) [Drunken Stepfather]
Carmen Electra Coat Cover-Up [Hollywood Rag]
Even Peter Andre thought Jordan was too Loaded on top [Seriously? OMG! WTF?]
Denise Richards is the Awfulest of Awful [Agent Bedhead]
Uma Thurman gets it on at the beach [The Blemish]
How Gay is Top Gun? [CityRag]
Mira Sorvino Employs Her Husband [Crazy Days and Nights]
Paris Braves Letterman Again [Popsugar]
Brian Austin Green: “My Hot Girlfriend’s Annoying. Boo Hoo.” [Celebnewswire]
Hayden Panettiere is a Political Juggernaut [Evil Beet]
Kelly Rowland On Stage [I Don't Like You In That Way]
Lucy Lawless Is Still Around [Glitterati Gossip]
Meg Ryan and her daughter Daisy are spotted at the Farmers Market [Celebrity Baby Scoop]
Rumer Willis Flashes Some Cleavage at a Party for a Phone [A Socialite's Life]
Jessica Simpson Still a Cowboys Fan [Just Jared]
American Pie star Jason Biggs is engaged [Lifeline Live]

Eva Longoria wants us to feel badly for her. Really, really badly. While she may be stunning now (at least by some people’s estimation) Eva says she was an ugly duckling growing up, and was picked on for her unbecoming looks. Though she certainly didn’t look like present-day Eva Longoria, she looks no worse than most other pictures of celebrities in their teen years. But Eva wants us to feel badly, so we must. She says she had to get by just on her stellar personality, since she didn’t have physical beauty to fall back on. Cry me a river.

Desperate Housewives star Eva Longoria, who has made her face her fortune in recent years, has revealed she was teased about her appearance as a child. The star, who has emerged as a red carpet darling with a string of lucrative deals with cosmetic companies, says her nickname growing up was “ugly duckling”.
Longoria, who is in the midst of a promotional blitz for her new film Over My Dead Body, said: “I was the darkest one of my family. I was the only one with black hair and the only one with dark skin. All my sisters were light blondes with hazel eyes. They used to call me ugly duckling.

The 32-year-old told Channel 4’s Richard and Judy: “I grew up without being beautiful so I kind of relied on my personality and my character. “I kind of developed a skill not to depend on anything superficial because I didn’t have anything superficial to depend on.”

[From the Daily Mail]

My God. By relying on her “personality and character” I hope Eva didn’t mean intellect, because clearly she doesn’t have any. As though I could dislike this woman any more. We don’t have access to the Daily Mail’s photos of a young Eva, but you can see them by clicking the link above. She’s very beautiful. And a cheerleader. A few of those pictures are unattractive, but that’s because it was 1993 and terrible, big curly hair was in vogue. You can still see Longoria is gorgeous. And not being beautiful because you’re not blond? That’s ridiculous. It sounds like her sisters were picking on the only thing they could. Or perhaps they were teasing her for the one way she was different. But she’s still a knockout. It’s lucky for her she’s got her looks, because I would wonder how far she’d get in life if she were really left to work with only her personality and character.

Picture note by Jaybird: Here’s Eva at the “Over Her Dead Body” Los Angeles Premiere yesterday. Images thanks to PR Photos.

Victoria Beckham, who I will forever refer to as Posh Spice, has been voted the sexiest mother by designers and executives at Victoria’s Secret. I’m not sure I look at those melons she has disguised as breasts and her neon orange glow and come up with sexy. Perhaps they meant skinniest mother? Scariest mother? The mother with a name similar to our company name?

Victoria’s Secret executives and designers have voted Posh Spice the world’s sexiest mum.

Victoria Beckham joins stars Eva Mendes, Josh Holloway, and American Idol host Ryan Seacrest on the lingerie company’s 2008 What Is Sexy? list.

The team of executives and designers who compiled the list looked for attributes such as “passion and humour and style and charisma”.

Sydney Morning Herald

I suspect that Posh only beat Angelina Jolie by the tiniest of margins (about as wide as her teeny waist) and soon will need to pass her crown to Halle Berry.

Is there too much pressure on mothers to be yummy mummies? Posh went into hiding during the later, larger months of her pregnancies, so she wouldn’t be seen as fat. Women all over the world would line up to see that tiny woman fat. I mean, pregnant. Fat would be more fun though. It must be nice for Victoria to get called the sexiest mother, as it can’t be easy maintaining that lithe physique.

Other sexy celebs, according to Victoria’s Secret, include Ryan Seacrest for his smile, Eva Mendes was sexiest actress (not as good an an Oscar but better than a kick in the teeth), and Katherine Heigl and Josh Kelley were sexiest newlyweds.

Header image is an older one of Victoria out with Romeo and Brooklyn.

I have never thought it was possible for breasts to have a career, but it seems the pair attached to Katie Price, aka Jordan, have proved me wrong.

The breasts have had four surgeries throughout their carriers career as a glamour model, and also appeared at promotional activities for Katie’s books and fragrance.

Now the breasts’ husband Peter Andre is also trying to use the breasts for his own career advancement, giving an interview about their qualities, following their recent reduction from a size 32FF. The breasts have declined to reveal their current size although I’m sure Katie will reveal it sometime soon.

He said: “I used to think just a little more than a handful was plenty enough and I was simply into legs and bums, but Katie and her amazing boobs changed my mind, big time.

“Once I had those babies in front of my eyes I was a changed man.

“I often get asked what Katie’s breasts feel like and I can tell you that they feel amazing. And very, very real. And very heavy.”

Though, with his sensible hat on, Peter reassures himself her reduction was a positive thing.

He even tries to convince himself they were perhaps too big for her anyway.

He told Loaded: “If I were completely honest - and I totally love Katie, she’s my wife and mother to my children - but I secretly thought they might have been too big for her body at one point.

“To be honest, she wasn’t even my type. I don’t mean she wasn’t pretty, but those fake breasts and blonde hair wasn’t what I’d normally go for.

“However, a few nights alone with her and I soon knew what all the fuss was about.”

The Sun

I suspect that J. Howard Marshall felt the same way about Anna Nicole Smith.

Katie Price actually looks really good post-surgery, she’s also had a nose job, and without the breasts stealing the spotlight you can see how beautiful she is. When you have a face as pretty as that, why divert attention away from it with overly large boobs? Although, do you kind of get the impression that Peter misses them, just a little?

Peter Andre and Katie Price have recently been in Peter’s home country of Australia, filming the forth season of their reality series Katie and Peter. Like the world needed more reality TV. Peter showed his kids the places he used to visit as a child, and also went for a meal at the Greek restaurant owned and run by his three brothers, as well as going to the nightclub he owns himslef. Expect to see all that and not much else on the new series.

Keep an eye out for Katie’s old breast implants, which she plans on auctioning for charity on eBay.

Picture note by Celebitchy: Header image of Peter and the breasts in larger times was taken on 9/21/07, thanks to PR Photos.

On Tuesday, the New York Giants and the New England Patriots arrived to a complete media circus in Arizona, where they will face off this weekend for the Super Bowl. During a press conference, Patriots quarterback Tom Brady was fielding and deflecting the usual questions about strategy and his possible ankle injury. Out of the blue, a young woman clad in a wedding dress and veil shouted out a marriage proposal to the flabbergasted star athlete:

Early into Brady’s question-and-answer session, TV Azteca reporter Inés Gómez Mont asked the star quarterback to marry her. Did we mention she was wearing a wedding dress?

“Tom, I’m in love with you!” she howled. “Will you marry me please?”

Brady deflected the proposal about as deftly as he has dodged inquiries about his injured ankle.

And he blushed, just a little.

“Are you really? Wow. I’ve never had a proposal,” Brady said, fumbling for the right words. “What’s your name first?”

[From Arizona Star Daily]

The wannabe bride was actually quite attractive, although probably either a little crazy or a bit desperate for some publicity. Tom gave her his best ‘aw shucks’ grin, and told her he was already taken. “I’m a one-woman man,” he said. Gomez-Mont responded by saying that she was the “Real Mrs. Brady,” to which Tom said, “There have been a few Miss Brady’s in my life,” and then moved on to the next question. The jilted bride later told reporters that she came to the press conference in the wedding gown, which was quite short and showed lacy white garter stockings underneath, “just in case he said yes.”

Brady dated and has a child with model/actress Bridget Moynahan, and is currently involved with Brazilian supermodel Gisele Bündchen. It has been rumored that a Championship ring for Brady could mean an engagement ring for Bündchen. Sorry, Inez.

Note by Celebitchy: Here’s the video, thanks to Shawn for sending it. It only shows Brady’s response and unfortunately we just hear Inez. I have a newfound respect for Brady after seeing how he handled this. What a gentleman he is!

Update: Here’s reporter Inés Gómez Mont in her wedding dress, thanks to The Arizona Daily Star.