Elisabetta Canalis & The Dictator on a yacht in the South of France. I wonder how much Eli got paid for this? I‘m kind of embarrassed for her. [LaineyGossip]
Dong leggings!! You know Rihanna wants a pair. [Dlisted]
Gisele‘s lace blouse is kind of trashy. [Pop Sugar]
A Teen Mom shows off her engagement ring via Twitter. [Celebuzz]
Fun facts about Gone With the Wind. [Pajiba]
More Anne Hathaway bikini photos. [Yeeeah]
Kristen Stewart is so hardcore. [The Blemish]
Miley Cyrus adopted ANOTHER puppy. [Evil Beet]
Lady Gaga goes pantsless for the millionth time. [A Socialite Life]
Tupac was tight with the late Gianni Versace? [Bossip]
France‘s new first lady is kind of awesome. [Jezebel]
Mariah Carey does not give a crap about Britney Spears. [Amy Grindhouse]
Lourdes Leon is pro-gay marriage. [INFDaily]
This baby loves Nirvana. [Videogum]
Am I looking at Jennifer Lopez‘s shadowy butt crack? [I’m Not Obsessed]
Awful high school dance story of the day. [LimeLife]
This Kathy Griffin closeup is unfortunate. [Celebslam]
I love Mindy Kaling so much. [PopBytes]

Charlize Theron is the cover girl for the June issue of InStyle Magazine (US). She’s also on the cover of the Australian magazine Madison – I’m including the cover image at the end of the post. I really like Charlize’s InStyle cover shoot, for what it’s worth. Charlize has been churning out some really great photo shoots lately, but usually InStyle’s pictorials aren’t this… fierce…? Is that the right word? In any case, Charlize looks gorgeous. As you know, she’s promoting Snow White and the Huntsman AND Prometheus, both out in June. And she has no problems talking about babies and boys and she even comes close to claiming that she hasn’t had any work done – do you believe her? Hm… anyway, here are some highlights from both InStyle and Madison:

On aging: “I don’t feel like I’m aging at all. I don’t think about that stuff. Especially not at 36. I see my face and my body changing, and they’re all changes I’m OK with. Part of me understands I may not be in front of the camera forever, and maybe not just because of age, but because of me. I wouldn’t have started my own production company if I didn’t feel that way.”

Becoming a mom: “So far I’m not surprised by anything about being a mom,” she said. “It’s all pretty great, but that’s what I expected.”

On her single status: “I’m always open to a relationship, but I’m not putting those feelers out there now.”

On having adopted son Jackson: Charlize recalled a letter she’d written when she was 8-years-old. “My mother found [it]. It said, ‘Would you please take me to orphanage, so that I can go and adopt a baby?’ I always knew I would adopt – always… It was never a question that one day I would have a child.”

On what she would do if she could switch careers at her current age: “I would be an amazing butler. I’m very good at organizing a house.”

Being a single mother: “You know, I don’t think any mother aims to be a single mum. I didn’t wish for that, but it happened.”

She’s not looking for a husband: “It’s never been a fantasy of mine. Marriage has never been that important to me. I don’t know why exactly. Some might say it’s because my parents didn’t have a good marriage, but I don’t think so. I treat my relationships like marriages. The ceremony isn’t that important to me,” she adds.

She hates pretentious people: “You know what I can’t stand? I hate actors who come and quote Nietzsche. I don’t like pretentious s**t. I like being around people who like to live life and understand the value of it. I need to be around people who understand we’re not curing cancer here. I like professional actors who show up, do the job and are not a pain in the a** to either myself or the crew. I don’t believe in this idea that if you’re f****d up and Method, that’s the only way to do good work. It’s bulls**t. A professional actor does their homework beforehand and they do their job. Then when it’s all said and done, they have a beer with the crew. That’s what a professional actor does.”

[Excerpts via the NY Post, Become Gorgeous and The Gossip Girls]

I love her diatribe against pretension. I want to know if she’s directing that at a specific actor. Who has she worked with recently? Michael Fassbender. Uh, no, not pretentious. He probably buys the first round for the crew. Idris Elba? God, I hope not. Noomi Rapace? From what I hear, Noomi’s pretty low-key and sweet. Kristen Stewart? Hmm. Charlize seems to like her. Chris Hemsworth? Doubtful. Damn, I want to know who she’s calling out!!

As for her statement about marriage – I believe her. I don’t think she’s one of those “Oh, I don’t want to get married unless you’ve got an engagement ring YES A MILLION TIMES YES!!!” women. I think Charlize’s marriage apathy is for real. And I do think it has a lot to do with her mom and dad’s situation.

Photos courtesy of InStyle, Madision.

Last week, we brought you W magazine’s disturbing June cover that featured a tatted, shirtless Tom Cruise (as Stacee Jaxx in Rock of Ages) flanked by a couple of blonde groupies. Some of you thought that Tom looked hot, but most of you agreed that he just looked gross. Now the rest of the ill-advised photoshoot has been released by W mag, and it is almost sadly hilarious to witness. Because Tom’s a cowboy. On a steel horse he rides. Check out these abdominal muscles, and we’ll discuss.

Kaiser, CB, and I were discussing this shoot, and we were primarily trying to figure out what’s going on with Tom’s abs. CB wondered if he got some of those implanted fake washboard abs similar to (but more subtle than) those of a recent Celebrity Big Brother contestant or if Tom’s just been heavily photoshopped because he doesn’t look real. Kaiser brought up Tom’s late 2010 shirtless candid photos on the set of MI4 where his stomach was all lumpy like he had some bad lipo. Personally, I think it’s a combo of some funky lipo coupled with a spray-tanned six pack and a hefty dose of Photoshop as well. Sort of how Robert Pattinson had to have his six-pack painted on for his shirtless scenes in New Moon. Only Tom has to take everything to extremes, so he has to have the best little spray-tanned abs available. As a result, he looks like a freak.

Oh and the cover shot groupies are also present in the photo spread as well. Their shots are mostly NSFW because one of the models whipped out a boob for both of her shots, including this one, which I cropped so that all you can see is the implied beej being offered to a very uninterested Tom.

Now let’s get onto the interview, which explains a lot about why Tom’s version of Stacee Jaxx seems far too serious in both trailers. It seems that Tom wanted his version of Stacee to be straightforward and different than the character from the Broadway musical. What a disaster in the making, and I can’t believe director Adam Shankman didn’t shut that notion down. Even W points out that Tom’s the only one in the movie that seems to not be playing their role with a few winks to the camera. Here are some excerpts from Tom’s interview:

Why Tom’s Stacee Jaxx is so serious “I didn’t want to imitate all these other rock stars. He had to be unique. If the audience doesn’t immediately buy into his absolute greatness, there’s no movie journey. Without that, you have nothing. Kate loves musicals. She sings and dances, and we kind of went through the history of musicals together. And Suri loved Hairspray. I thought Adam Shankman did a great job directing the movie, so I arranged to meet him and said, ‘Where’s our musical?’ He came back and said, ‘Rock of Ages.’ We went and saw it in L.A., and for me, I didn’t know how to play the character like that. I had to find my own Stacee Jaxx.”

Stacee’s monkey was Tom’s idea: “I needed to find out if I could really sing! And then I had to learn how to play guitar. I’m very good at air guitar and air drums, but I had never played an actual guitar. After working for weeks on Stacee’s technical skills, I was thinking about the character, and I said, ‘You know what? I need a monkey.’ Adam said, ‘What the f&#* are you talking about?’ And I said, ‘I’m serious, I need a monkey.’ When Stacee’s not onstage, he’s kind of sad. And I thought, This guy has to have a monkey that’s his best friend. Adam found this baboon. He sent me the baboon’s audition tape, and I said, ‘The baboon’s name has to be Hey Man. Stacee Jaxx doesn’t work without Hey Man.’”

Tom loved to dance as a teenager: “You know what? I did the scene from Risky Business around the house. I would sing Bob Seger‚ my mother worked, my sisters were out, and I’d turn the music up. I learned how to dance watching Soul Train. I noticed that if a guy could dance, he’d get a lot of attention and girls would want to dance with him. I worked very hard at imitating those moves.”

[From W magazine]

So it was Tom who insisted on a monkey named Hey Man? I don’t even know what to do with that except to add that to the evidence pile. I’ve already stated my belief that Tom is trying far too hard in this role, and he’s taking his portrayal of Stacee far too seriously to match the mood of the movie. Kaiser adds that Tom is playing it far “too earnest” because the character demands some “humor and irony.” Unfortunately, I don’t think that Tom even acknowledges the existence of irony. He insists upon simply playing every character straight, or he doesn’t take the role at all. Perhaps “straight” is a bad way to describe Tom’s acting method, but you catch my drift. Here’s more of the atrocious W photo shoot, and you can see the rest at the W site.

Notice how Tom is posing with an empty (?) bottle of Jack Daniels because Scientologists don’t do liquor. Either that or it’s filled with barley water.

Photos courtesy of W magazine

Jennifer Aniston is still the face of SmartWater. Us Weekly says that this is her “second” year as the face of the Glaceau brand, but I seem to remember her getting the contract… maybe back in 2009? That’s when her ad campaign seemed to have begun as well, which means this is her fourth year as the face of the brand. I seem to remember hearing that Aniston wasn’t just getting a standard payment for her modeling – she also gets stock in the company? Which is smart, especially because Aniston and SmartWater are such a great, compatible “fit” together – people associate her with exercise and gyms and eating healthy, so she works well with a bottled water brand.

Anyway, these are the two new print ads. Almost all of them have been done in black-and-white, and the Photoshop quality usually varies to either extreme. There were some memorable ads two years ago where the Photoshop wizards made Aniston’s nose ridiculously upturned, like a snout. She’s usually scantily-clad too. So how do these ads stack up? Eh. The photo where she’s wearing the black t-shirt – that one is okay. I mean, it looks really retouched, but it still looks like HER. But the one with light-colored, half-buttoned blouse? It looks like they morphed her face with someone else. And her lips look kind of crazy in that one too.

Last year she also did a commercial for the brand, although I think it was more of a would-be viral video that rarely (if ever) aired on TV. I wonder if she’ll do a commercial this year?

Photos courtesy of SmartWater.

I know we’ve got a lot of Kristen Stewart and Charlize Theron news today, but in my defense, there are lots of new photos, interviews and gossip. And they are promoting the hell out of Snow White & the Huntsman… because both Charlize and Kristen have a lot riding on this movie. Both of them need SWATH to be a big hit. Will it be a big hit? I think it will make a lot of money, but it won’t be like an Avengers or Hunger Games-style mega-hit.

Anyway, as I mentioned in the earlier K-Stew post, Kristen, Charlize and some of the SWATH people headed to Germany yesterday after the UK swing of the press tour. I had hoped that the Berlin premiere would be held last night, but it looks like it’s going to be tonight. These are photos from the (day-time) SWATH photo call. First thought: I like that Charlize and Kristen don’t look like they’ve (badly) coordinated their looks like they did at the London premiere.

Apparently, Kristen’s dress is 10 Crosby by Derek Lam. Still not wearing Balenciaga, I see. Still, this Lam is a big improvement over the Marchesa hideousness. I’m not really in love with the whole look, but Kristen looks presentable and interesting, which is an accomplishment. Oh, and the belt is Alexander McQueen. I feel like Charlize might have given her the belt.

As for Charlize’s outfit – I don’t know. If anyone has the designer ID, please share it. I think Charlize looks nice and appropriate here – and I buy that she probably had this outfit in her closet already, you know? I’m also including a photo of Sam Clafin, “the prince” of SWATH. He’s kind of meh. He and Kristen look like siblings.

Photos courtesy of WENN.

This is a really weird story, but Robert Pattinson has reportedly pulled the ferquing diva card about his nipples during his recent shoot with Premiere magazine. That is, Rob was fine with having a female model grope him while the camera clicked away but allegedly drew the line when the photographer instructed the young lady to start licking his nipples. The shoot in question contains the set of photos that functioned as a homage to the works of David Cronenberg, and Rob was totally fine with the surreal, weird, violent vibe but couldn’t handle some random chick’s saliva on his nips. Perhaps he could have asked Tom Cruise for some guidance on how to enjoy an implied beej with an air of detachment? Or not.

Anyway, some people are really implying that Rob is a diva over this mess, and it’s rather amusing that such a huge deal is being made over nothing. After all, Rob once famously endured a 12-hour Details shoot with assorted naked models and then went onto joke about how he was “allergic to v-gina.” So just leave him alone about his nipples, alright? Here’s the scoop from Radar Online:

Robert Pattinson is willing to sex things up on camera and get steamy for a photo shoot, but sometimes, things are just a little TOO steamy, even for the adventurous Brit!

The Twilight hunk got down and dirty for a recent photo shoot with French Premiere magazine, but drew the line when it came to naked nipple licking, RadarOnline.com is exclusively reporting.

The bizarre photo shoot was in honor of Pattinson’s new movie, Cosmopolis, and lasted a whopping thirteen hours. The shoot got pretty racy, culminating in a doubled up, half naked Pattinson posing in bed with a woman – but what ended up on the cutting floor was even more X-rated!

“Rob was asked to pose bare chested with a sexy blonde model, who happened to be topless as well,” a source tells RadarOnline.com. “He did his best Blue Steel for the camera as the girl snaked all over his body, nibbling his earlobes, kissing his face and neck and pressing her bare boobs against him, but you could see he was uncomfortable with it.

“Rob was really torn — because the girl was stunning and he’s a bit of a cad — he was definitely having a really good time being half naked with a hot blonde with her boobs out, but then he seemed to get all nervous and started worrying that it was just going too far.”

Then came the straw that broke the camel’s back!

“Toward the end of the shot the photographer instructed the model to lick Rob’s nipples! That was the kiss of death — Rob called cut and went in his dressing room and made a phone call. But, he did come back a few minutes later to finish off the photo session, so everyone thought it was all good.”

However, the source says, a few days later the magazine got a call demanding the naked nipple licking photos be pulled from the issue.

Guess some things are just not for public consumption!

[From Radar Online]

It’s a photoshoot, sure. It means nothing. But still, I wouldn’t even want the hottest dude licking my nipples for all the world to see. Some people would argue that it’s different for guys because nipples aren’t so taboo, but this chick was actually placing her bodily fluids on them. That probably made Rob feel uncomfortable even if he wasn’t the f–cking boyfriend of Kristen Stewart. Also, some guys have really sensitive nipples, and others don’t. Maybe Rob is of the former camp, and he didn’t want to have photographic evidence of his genuine arousal floating around for all of posterity. If it was a Terry Richardson shoot, maybe he should expect it, but this was for a feature in the fairly well-respected Premiere magazine.

Bottom line — Rob’s nipples, Rob’s right to be a diva about them.

Photos courtesy of Premiere

Judging solely by the cover image of the always-underrated and lovely Elizabeth Banks, I was prepared to love this cover shoot. Unfortunately, Allure used their prettiest photo of Banks for the June cover, and all of the other photos are awful. Like, she looks like a wax figure of a blow-up doll in the other shots. It’s not cute. Still, we love Elizabeth, don’t we? I’m not expecting many people to comment on her though. I’ve prepared myself for this to be one of the least commented-on posts of the day. You guys would rather rag on Kim Kardashian than show a cool lady like Elizabeth some love. Yes, that was a challenge. LOVE HER, damn it.

As far as Elizabeth’s cover interview… it’s a bit hit-or-miss. I really love some of the stuff she says, especially about earning more money than her husband. But I feel like the language and terminology she uses to describe becoming a mother through surrogacy… well, it could use some work. It pains me to admit that, because I loved the initial statement she made about surrogacy. Here are some excerpts:

Expecting a baby via surrogacy last year: “I had already mourned the loss of my fertility for myself, so I was past it. The only time it really affected me was when Alec Baldwin looked me straight in the eye and asked me, ‘Are you pregnant right now?’ Alec Baldwin asked me straight up. I had made a comment about wearing a fake belly, something innocuous, and he looked me straight in the eye and asked me, ‘Are you pregnant right now?’ And I blanched totally. Because of course, technically, no I wasn’t. But then, technically, yes, in a way I was! And it was very weird. I thought Alec was reading my mind or something. We weren’t telling anyone then, so I said ‘No.’ I thought, ‘Is that a lie?’ Because it wasn’t a lie, and yet it was a lie!”

On her son Felix: “It’s essentially a test tube baby — it’s just the test tube is another woman. That you can grow a baby outside of yourself! It’s amazing!”

On What To Expect When You’re Expecting: “I did [the movie] for my fellow females,” says Banks, who stars alongside Jennifer Lopez, 42, Cameron Diaz, 39, Anna Kendrick, 26, and Brooklyn Decker, 25. “I thought I was standing up for all the women who have crazy horrible pregnancies — you know, there’s all these things we’re not allowed to talk about in public.”

On her weight and body image: “It’s not good to put in a magazine what I weigh because it’s too little. People freak out when they hear what I weigh,” Banks says. “They think, ‘Oh, you’re too skinny.’ But I ate a cupcake last night — and I eat broccoli. I work out with a trainer; she kicks my ass.”

She didn’t like her figure growing up: “I thought I had chicken legs, and I thought, Oh, my boobies are too small,” she says. “It was the era of Cindy Crawford and The Body—and I didn’t have that.”

Earning more money than her husband: “Well, we’re the first generation to do it. And it’s very ingrained even in our DNA that men are hunter-gatherers who are meant to go off and provide. And that we are really meant to stay at home and have kids…. Let’s be honest. Men love a second income. It gets them their boat and their vacations. They want their wives to work.”

Sexism in Hollywood: “When you’re young in this business, you don’t realize it, but there are no superhero movies starring women! I was very idealistic. And so it was an adjustment knowing I was going into a movie and would be working just as hard as the male actors, and in some cases feeling I was more talented than they were—and knowing I was making a fraction of their salary. And knowing also that this is my reality going forward.”

[From Us Weekly, Allure]

See? I like the part about out-earning her husband and how she knew that she was more talented than most of the men who out-earn her. It’s interesting to think that right now, at the age of 38, Elizabeth has finally come into her own as an actress. Meaning that she toiled as a character actress and supporting player for more than a decade, and while she’s probably still considered a “character actress,” she’s getting so much more attention these days because of What To Expect, The Hunger Games and 30 Rock. Her IMDB is insane – she works SO MUCH. God, I love her.

Photos courtesy of Allure.

Earlier this year, some tabloid revealed this scandalous information: Angelina Jolie still gets along with her ex-husband, Bill Bob Thornton. She actually gets along with both of her exes, BBT and Jonny Lee Miller, by the way – JLM and his wife still come out to support Angelina’s projects whenever they’re all in the same city. Anyway, the tabloids were freaking out because BBT has written a memoir (-ish) and Angelina wrote the foreword to it. Soon after that news came out, the tabloids simply ran several stories claiming that OBVIOUSLY Angelina and BBT are still boning in their leathery sex shack because obviously. OBVS. Anyway, Life & Style has an early excerpt of just what Angelina says in the foreword:

They’ve been divorced for nearly 10 years, but Angelina Jolie still has a soft spot for ex-husband Billy Bob Thornton. In Billy Bob’s new book, The Billy Bob Tapes: A Cave Full of Ghosts, which Life & Style has obtained, Angelina pens the foreword and says her former partner “has a big beautiful heart.”

But that’s not at all: “He has an unmatchable wit and can make you laugh until your face hurts,” Angie writes.

The 36-year-old actress, who got engaged to partner of seven years Brad Pitt in April, gives even more details about Billy Bob’s personality.

“To be with him is like being with a mad mathematician,” she adds. “He is constantly counting and repeating.”

Along with talking about the things the 56-year-old actor loves and dislikes, Angie admits the world, and she herself, would not be the same without him around.

“Some people walk through life able to quiet the voices in their heads. He can’t. And I, and everyone else who knows him well, we love him for it,” she says, ending with, “I know one thing: The world would certainly be a hell of a lot more dull if that man weren’t in it.”

Billy recently opened up about his marriage to Angie, calling the failure of their relationship his fault.

“I blew it because I didn’t think I was good enough for her,” he said. “She has one way she wanted to live her life and I had another way to live mine, and I was just too insecure.”

Billy Bob Thornton and Angie Jolie, who co-starred in the 1999 film Pushing Tin, married in 2000 and were divorced in 2003.

[From Life & Style]

It sounds like Angelina still has a great deal of affection for BBT, although… I do feel like she sounds rather removed, almost like she’s eulogizing him rather than describing a living, breathing man who still exists in this world. Like, it seems like Billy Bob might be frozen in time for her, stuck permanently in 2001, and she barely knows the BBT of 2012. Anyway, that’s just my armchair analysis. I don’t think they’re boning. I don’t think Angelina is having any kind of sexual nostalgia. I think she’s just being generous with a man whom she remembers fondly.

Photos courtesy of WENN, PR Photos.

Kristen Stewart was in London for a few days to promote Snow White & The Huntsman, and then yesterday she flew to Germany. I was expecting to come in this morning to fresh Berlin premiere photos, but that didn’t happen. Maybe the Berlin premiere is tonight? I don’t know. I’m sure the Twihards will come in and tell me the schedule momentarily. While I’ve got the Twihards’ attention, does anyone know if SWATH also has a premiere at the Cannes Film Festival? I know Kristen is scheduled to appear on behalf of On the Road, but it seems like SWATH would also get a (non-competition) premiere at Cannes as well.

Anyway, I just thought I’d share this story – after the UK premiere of SWATH two nights ago (in which Kristen wore that Marchesa monstrosity), Kristen and her “f–king boyfriend” Robert Pattinson were all kinds of loved up at the post-premiere party. Aw, cute.

A fairytale romance fit for a fairytale premiere! Kristen Stewart didn’t have to attend the London premiere Monday of her new film Snow White and the Huntsman alone. Her Twilight costar and real-life boyfriend, Robert Pattinson, secretly attended the premiere in his hometown at Empire Cinema London.

“Rob was Kristen’s date,” a source tells Us Weekly. Stewart, who plays Snow White, presented the film with the cast on stage while Pattinson watched from the audience.

“Rob was cheering and clapping for Kristen as they walked off stage,” the source adds. “He looked proud of his girlfriend.”

After the premiere, the cast attended Ciroc Ultra Premium Vodka’s official after party at the Royal Courts of Justice. Stewart, 22, changed out of her black lace Marchesa gown into a leather jacket and jeans. Pattinson, who celebrated his 26th birthday Sunday, also dressed casually in his trademark baseball cap.

“Rob met Kristen there,” a partygoer tells Us. “They stayed together in the VIP area all night and looked really cozy. They made sure no one saw them or photographed them.”

But they weren’t alone! Pattinson also brought his family to the party to support his Snow White.

[From Us Weekly]

Is this how a studio-promoted couple eases their way into being an actual couple? I actually don’t think this is a studio romance at this point. I had some doubts a few years ago, but it feels more and more like the real deal. Kristen and Robert are really dating. She’s down with his family, he’s down with her family. He even brings his family to a party to support Kristen. It really is very cute. Rob’s going to be in Cannes too – and while the Twihards have high hopes that they’re walk each other’s red carpets together, I doubt it will happen. Still, I bet they party together every night.

These are some pics of Kristen in London, going into a BBC interview. I don’t get why the “side-knotted” t-shirt is her new trend. She’s been doing that for months, trying to make that look “happen”. It’s not happening. Also, those skinny jeans look poured on, they’re so incredibly tight. How is this outfit comfortable?

Photos courtesy of WENN.

George Clooney’s got a new bitch and she’s BEAUTIFUL. I was hoping that these photos were candids of Clooney and a new adopted puppy, but they’re just shots of Clooney filming a commercial for Android smart phones, and the beautiful dog is just an “actor”. Isn’t the puppy gorgeous? I’ve never seen Clooney with a redhead before, and now I can’t help but think… this works. He’s been with exotic, mannish brunettes, he’s done the glorified escort thing, it’s time for a redhead who nuzzles his crotch on a public beach, out in the open. I’m guessing Clooney dismissed the redhead because he doesn’t like his bitches to have successful careers.

According to The Mail, the puppy was smitten with George too, though. The Mail notes: “Although the dog wasn’t his own pet, it looked like the pair had quickly struck up a rapport. While holding the phone in his hand, Clooney stroked, patted and chatted to his new pal.” Apparently, the puppy even preferred George’s company when the cameras were off too. Maybe the puppy was just smelling George’s dog – he has an overweight puppy named Einstein – Einstein was used during Clooney’s last Oscar campaign, and Einstein fell short, apparently. Maybe Clooney needs a big, beautiful redhead. This dog is like the canine equivalent of Christina Hendricks.

Love the photos of the puppy groping George. You know George is all, “Hey, baby. Have you ever been to Lake Como?”

Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet.