Ashton Kutcher makes video complaining of f’ing jacka** neighbor

Ashton Kutcher is one of Hollywood’s bigger jackasses. Ironically, that’s exactly what he’s calling his next door neighbor, who’s had the nerve to start construction on his home as early as 7:30 in the morning, according to Kutcher. Instead of simply filing some sort of legal action, Ashton decided to pull out his video camera and document the neighbor’s jackassery. And from watching it, you can hear just how enraged he is than anyone would violate his sleep.

I’m just recording this for legal purposes, but I can also share it with the world. It’s 7:30 AM, and I get to wake up in my bedroom to my f’ing jackass neighbor…doing this next to my porch. This is my porch! This is my house. This is my deck. Right up there, that’s my bedroom. This is where my dickweed neighbor has decided to be building a house at 7AM, pounding on steel and welding right next to my frickin’ house. I woke up this morning to pounding, welding steel. I’m gonna lose it on this guy. I’m gonna lose it. I’m gonna lose it. It’s been going on for four months now. This guy’s got another thing coming.

Ashton took his displeasure to Twitter:

– this SOB owl feces cougar placenta jack bone dick! about 1 hour ago from web
– Jack ass 7am building a god damn fort next to my house f’in up my view and noise polluting
– the entire f’in nieghborhood with pounding steal about 1 hour ago from web
– holy moly I’m gonna lose it! about 1 hour ago from web
– this ass clown has another thing coming! about 1 hour ago from web
– I’m gonna kill my neighbor! about 1 hour ago from web

– Ashton’s wife also took to Twitter to back up her man:
– calm and gentle baby you can pull out the paint gun later! about 1 hour ago from web
– baby keep it together there should only be another 5 months of this. about 1 hour ago from web
– the neighbor doing consruction with 6 guys pounding hammers against steel at 7am is no way to wake up! about 1 hour ago from web

[From the Huffington Post]

I do get how annoying that must be, but I also think it’s pretty juvenile to make some movie bitching about it and post it on the internet. Unless the neighbor is famous, why the hell would he care about a video? Most cities have noise ordinances, and have a set hour at which construction can begin and must end. If the guy’s in violation of that, then call it in each and every day. Or go through other legal channels. Resorting to a video is just dumb.

As the Huffington Post mentioned, Ashton and Demi have also gotten really into Twitter. Which I find to be just about the most annoying thing in the world. I can always tell when someone’s using Twitter on Facebook because they feel the need to obsessively report on the excruciating minutiae of their lives. No I don’t care what you had for lunch! No I don’t care that your microwave is broken! No I don’t care that your favorite instrument is the cello! Just like you’d expect, Ashton and Demi’s other Twitters are just as empty and useless as can be. These two have way too much free time on their hands.

Here’s Ashton and Demi at ServiceNation’s ‘A New Era of Service’ Martin Luther King Day Breakfast at Ballou Senior High School in Washington DC on Januar 19th. Images thanks to WENN.

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25 Responses to “Ashton Kutcher makes video complaining of f’ing jacka** neighbor”

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  1. Elizabeth says:

    Heh, he said cougar.

  2. Baholicious says:

    The pandemic of self-importance has reached epidemic proportions I see.

  3. Jag says:

    So if his neighbor ends up dead, at least the police have the video and Twitter as evidence. (grin)

  4. 99 says:

    Sounds like someone was hella hanged over!!

  5. jess says:

    sometimes you just need to vent. my g*dd*mn garbage truck comes on mondays and thursdays between 530 and 6 AM (!) to pick up my apartment complexes STEEL dumpsters. that driver slams those things around like crazy…as someone who doesnt get off work until around 11 or midnight the night before, im sure you can guess how much i love hearing that.

    I can totally relate to ashtons anger.

  6. YoMamma says:

    I have no sympathy for him. I have been living with construction noise for over 12 months. Celebitchy’s right when you say there are city ordinances; ours is from 7:00 AM to 9:00 PM. Poor Ashton – what a hard life you have. Don’t you and Demi have another house you can move to for the next few months? I’m sure there are some people who have lost their homes recently who would be glad to put up with the noise.

  7. Jag says:

    I have a solution for him… earplugs.

  8. Dorothy says:

    He is sleeping in his multi-million dollar home e bitching about a little noise at 7:30 in the morning when most people are getting their asses out of bed to go to their suck ass jobs making way less than he does. And he is mad about his view. I HATE HATE HATE him and stupid Demi.

  9. Annie says:

    If people even have jobs to go to!

    Most people are worrying about their house being foreclosed and not being able to feed their families.

    But oh no, poor Ashton is awakened too early for his liking! THE HORROR.

  10. Dorothy says:

    and his stupid hat…

  11. Yadira says:

    Someone should not allow this doofess around a camera. His 15 mins of fame were over years ago. Demi’s were over a century ago. Get over it

  12. Cinderella says:

    I can completely understand how an ass of a neighbor can get under one’s skin. The neighbor probably knows this is pissing him off, so he’s making sure those crews start at the crack of dawn.

    I’m on Ashton’s side for this one.

  13. Emily says:

    Poor Ashton. Our old neighbors used dynamite to blast through the bedrock underneath the foundations of their house to build a basement. And it lasted several weeks. Not to mention some tiles fell off our fireplace due to the blasts.

  14. Jeane says:

    His porch is bigger than my entire house.

  15. Lucinda says:

    You know, they would start construction on the house next to us when it was being built at 6:30 in the morning. Yes, it was very annoying. It drove us crazy since they would sometimes quit and go to another site as early as 10:30 in the morning. Just long enough to ensure we couldn’t sleep in.

    BUT…we were grown-ups who understood that this was a temporary situation that would last only a few months. It never occurred to us to make a video complaining about it using obscene language.

    This is a prime example of someone used to being the center of the universe. Seriously, grow up. AND learn how to properly use a camera so it isn’t one big blur.

  16. katyalia says:

    This is simultaniously filmed by Casey Affleck, right?

  17. Annie says:

    What I want to know is, whether he’s bothered to act like an adult about all this and go peacefully speak to his neighbor?

    Like perhaps try to negotiate a more suitable time to start construction that both parties can be happy with.

    That would be the mature thing to do, but then again, this is Ashton Kutcher…

  18. vdantev says:

    Kelso should be rooting around for food in Kentucky Fried Chicken garbage bins not tapping A list booty and making headlines. Just saying.

  19. Cha Cha says:

    HAHAHAHA he said cougar placenta..

    You mean what your girlfriend will produce if you can knock up the old hag with the help of some fertility drugs?

    ok, she’s not bad looking for her age, just sayin!

  20. vicsmith5 says:

    Ha! He just pledged a week ago to help Obama make this world a friendlier place.

  21. Maxtasy says:

    LoL in Germany normally they start at 7 !
    7.30 would be late here.

  22. CB Rawks says:

    Yeah, 7am is pretty average. Where I live sometimes it’s even earlier.

    You would think that his mansion would have excellent sound-proofing. Don’t the rich pay out the ass to have their place be an oasis?
    I would.

  23. santacruz says:

    This guy ashton has nothing between the ears…what is the appeal????? He is the perennial adolescent…not very attractive!

  24. georgiagrl says:

    He comes across as a complete fool! Whinny, spoiled and totally out of touch with the real world. We all deal with construction, leaf bowers, lawn mowers, pressure washers even earlier than 7am. He doesn’t even work so get the hell up, poor party boy.
    I agree with santacruz, what’s the appeal? Go to ANY mall, and there’s at least 1 dude far more attractive than him.

  25. LordoftheWang says:

    Ashton Kutcher?…the useless mans inspiration, stop the fuedin and the fussin and hop back into bed with Nanna