For a few weeks, Brad Pitt’s team has been trying to spin the DCFS investigation into Brad’s behavior towards his kids (specifically Maddox) on a private plane in September. The spin is along the lines of “Brad loves and adores his kids and they are his first priority.” It might be true. But what’s also true is that the month-long DFCS investigation has been extended because the initial investigation came up with more claims of verbal abuse against Brad.
In Touch Weekly actually had one of the first stories about this – their sources claim that the investigation has been extended “for a reason” and it will likely go on for several more weeks. DCFS is apparently “heavily investigating” Brad for “verbally abusing” his kids “on many occasions.” DCFS is looking for more witnesses and they are interviewing nannies and staff members. After In Touch Weekly sent out their story, TMZ confirmed with their “Angelina sources,” with those sources saying that yes, the DCFS investigation has been “expanded” to include the kids witnessing interactions between Brad and Angelina, and some stories that “some of the children have been fearful around Brad, and Maddox in particular has problems with his dad. We’re told the meeting Brad had with Maddox last week ended quickly because Maddox didn’t want to be there.”
Yesterday, People Magazine also did a story about how the DCFS investigation is still ongoing and for now, Brad and Angelina are merely adhering to the custodial protocols laid out by DCFS.
Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie will continue to follow the temporary family decision plan recommended by the Los Angeles County Department of Children and Family Services as its investigation continues. The investigation was launched after Pitt allegedly got “verbally abusive” and “physical” with one of his children with Angelina Jolie on the couple’s private plane on Sept. 14. Jolie filed for divorce five days later.
The former couple agreed to a voluntary parenting plan including counseling and visitation, which was scheduled through Oct. 20. Multiple sources now tell PEOPLE that both the DCFS investigation and temporary plan will be continued.
“They’re looking for a history or pattern of behavior,” a legal source with knowledge of the situation tells PEOPLE. With this continuation, says source, “They are looking at the original inciting incident and anything surrounding that, and looking at any relevant history.”
Another source with legal knowledge of the situation tells PEOPLE, “Things remain in a holding pattern at this point and are ideally nearing a conclusion. This investigation has always been and continues to be open-ended.”
The second source notes that extending investigations is not unusual for the DCFS. “People have erroneously made the assumption that he original Oct. 20th date of the agreement between the two parties was also in some way a deadline for DCFS, and that is simply not the case,” explains the source.
We’ll see. I mean, what is there to say? I think it says something that DCFS’s investigation is so open-ended, and it wouldn’t surprise me if there were other troubling incidents. From a PR standpoint, there really isn’t a way to “spin” this, which is probably why Brad made such a big deal about how he’s not going to file his own legal response to Angelina’s divorce filing. Both Angelina and Brad are in a holding pattern until everything about their family is investigated thoroughly.
Photos courtesy of WENN, Fame/Flynet.
at the end of the day Hollywood is just mirrors and smoke. I sometimes meet with friends who are deeply in the industry and wouldn’t they be billionaire if they could just dish dish and dish. I myself dated one of the “celebrity” and what is said in the media often differ from behind the door. I have to applaud his manager and PR team. Actually I applaud whoever works for the rich and celebs because it ain’t for the faint heart.
Sooooooooo true.
Which is why I troll anon online when a celeb I’m working with pisses me off 😉
I agree. When you think of the perfect family image we’ve seen over the last 10 years you really feel conned. I think it’s time for celebrities to just do their job and keep their private lives private. I really feel for the children in this case as they have been used by their parents for publicity and now they are fodder for us all reading about what is allegedly an abusive home.
Hmm, so it was not just one incident..
It almost never is and I say ALMOST in the hope that somewhere out there is at least one situation when everything stopped after one incident. (personally, I have no knowledge of one isolated case of abuse)
I was thinking the interviews would be where they would find other incidents. My dad’s mom shot herself in the head when he was 3 in front of him, his brother, and sister. My dad told the police, etc, something different from his brother. Their ages wete 3 1/2 and 5, that case took years and tore that family apart. I figured the kids would be revealing at least a few incidences, as terrible as it sounds. I’m glad they are finding out what they can.
My father slapped me once when I was a teenager. We were having a terrible fight and I do understand why it happened though it shouldn’t have happened. He immediately apologized and it never happened again nor was he ever abusive in any other way.
I had a feeling there would be. Like the incident on the plane was the final straw. I’m glad she got out while she could.
The plane may be the first time it got physical between Brad and any of the kids. But you’re right that it’s almost never just one incident.
Perhaps things actually getting physical rather than just verbal was it for Angelina and she finally ended things.
It’s a sad situation. I hope the kids all recover from it okay.
It’s never one incident. This was just the straw that broke the camel’s back.
This is so hearbreaking
I would love if we could only talk when the investigation is closed, right now all these stories are just stressfull.
It is almost undeniable that brad has a problems.
I would say it is undeniable that the family has problems. Until the investigation is concluded we cannot know the real nature of those problems . In a situation like this, anyone leaking to the press is morally bankrupt and whatever they say should be given very little, if any, consideration. Everyone leaking to the press has an agenda and I sincerely doubt that the welfare of the children is high on their list.
WOW WOW WOW
Speechless
This is none of our business and honestly, I feel so bad for the kids in this situation that will be preserved forever on the Internet for them, that I’m ashamed I even clicked on the story.
Two years ago a Lady was killed inside her house by her husband in front of her children in the town I live.. Of course suddenly there were a lot of journalists an TV´s in the couple street. At night I was watching the news and the neighbours of that family who lived in the same building were all saying: This is a shock. He was such a great person that we never imagined he could do that. Later in the trial there were plenty of evidences that the woman was a victim of domestic violence for years. Some people even said that sometimes they heard her crying but they did nothing.
THIS IS ABSOLUTLY OUR BUSSINESS
I think you’re mistaking people not reporting domestic violence to the police and children being further traumatized by what is obviously a very traumatic divorce with media speculation and assumption. I absolutely believe there was some abuse, but I also know non famous kids won’t have hundreds of articles to look over with things that aren’t true, comments to read and the inability to ever know 100% the truth because millions of people said so many things it’s hard to sort out.
Divorce is painful for children, domestic violence is horrible, but this paying out in the media, reports from both sides this and that is wrong. I stand by my statement THIS is none of out business.
Except in your analogy we are still just the people watching the TV reporting. No one hear knows them personally and just decided to turn a blind eye. We didn’t have the insight to intervene and save the poor woman’s life any more than we have a connection or insight into the day-to-day inter workings of their family. We are just the reasons news vans show up and camp out after a tragedy.
Ana I have to ask, do you live in North Carolina by any chance? Because I have a friend who died under those exact same conditions. She was also pregnant. It was horrific.
This is not speculation. These are official reports coming from institutions. And the public reaction to these high profile cases matters a lot because it can either encourage people that are perhaps in much worse situations than Angie and Brad or it can discourage them.
Following the public reaction to Amber Heard’s abuse and now Brad Pitts’s situation, people that are experiencing abuse right now, already scared and tortured, have no incentive to come out because the public reaction is either ‘none of my business’ or ‘give me video proof and I still don’t believe you!’. There is no support for the abused right now within the public opinion.
Also, I don’t think their kids are stupid. Brad and Angie (regardless of what’s happening now) seemed to raise their kids with the full understanding of who they are in the world, the understanding that they are not ordinary children (because ordinary children don’t travel with private planes). They were not overexposed (like Garner’s kids) but they were not hidden either. I think they know who their parents are and what the fuss is about in the media.
I have never made comments about the kids, not even to express my compassion, because I have a feeling they are smart kids and their problem is not the media. All that matters in life is to be happy, if they manage to be happy, it won’t matter what I say about them or anyone else.
And FYI, all divorces are public. Relatives, friends, colleagues, they will all have to be informed, the rumor mill will start and it’s the same situation on a different scale. Everyone will have an opinion. For Angie and Brad, the rumor mill is larger. It’s life. Sometimes, celebrities have the privilege to conceal some parts of the split but when Child Services get involved, that privilege is automatically gone.
@ALS, I have to agree. I don’t understand all of these comments in which people seem to distraught to even be reading about this, let alone commenting.
Divorce IS a “public” thing no matter who you are. I had a dear friend go through a divorce after her husband cheated on her, and even though it was one of the worst times in her life, she had to tell her family what happened. She had to tell friends, colleagues. It is what it is – when a big change happens, it’s discussed.
Obviously this is being discussed on the world stage, but Brad and Angelina knew that would be the case. They actively courted public attention to their family: choosing to sell baby and wedding photos to People magazine, etc. (Even if the proceeds were donated to charity, they were still making their private life very, very public.)
I think every single one of us here on CB would agree that this is awful for the kids. But the hand-wringing and pearl-clutching over reading about it is tiresome.
I sincerely HATE to be “that person,” but if you feel so strongly about it, why click on the story in the first place? Just keep scrolling. But it seems counteractive to make comments seemingly designed to make the rest of us all feel guilty for reading about Brangelina’s private lives. They ~chose~ to live their lives in the spotlight. Full stop.
Finally I couldn’t agree more with your point that the public reaction to this could absolutely affect “regular” women in the same situation, and hopefully, make them less fearful of seeking help; there might be less of a stigma in the minds of many since this happened with a family that the entire world collectively viewed as happy (if not perfect!). It’s a bit sad that this is the case, that a celebrity could hold so much sway over people’s actions, but it’s the way it is, and I can definitely see Angelina inspiring others to come forward who might not have before. At least then maybe, possibly, something positive could have come out of this whole mess.
+1. Divorce can be an ugly business. We will probably never know what happened in that relationship nor should we. The biggest losers in all of this are the children. Regardless of what happened, this should have been handled better, quietly, for the sake of those kids.
Neither parent sounds like a winner and that makes all the children the losers.
@DeniseMich
It’s been a shock to think that one parent could be struggling with an addiction or alcohol problem to the extent it’s led to such a turbulent breakup, and a culmination in a particularly traumatic incident.
What hasn’t been shocking?
The need for the usual suspects to want to malign Angelina as usual, despite zero evidence that she had anything to do with the escalation on the plane. She clearly is establishing boundaries, looking out for her family’s welfare and seemingly trying to enable Brad’s healing as well. Maybe through tough love, who knows?
But comments denigrating the mother who removed the kids in the hopes they can all heal, in the absence of any first hand knowledge is pretty despicable.
Have a seat Chelsea.
almondmilk
Thank you !
@almond milk, Wow obviously you have strong feelings about this.
I said nothing specific about angelina except I don’t think this had to go public. I question the way this was handled. I am team children that is all.
OH please – Has anyone ever been to a supermaket or the mall? If parents were report to CPS for speaking poorly to their children, millions of parents would be investigated. Aynone who has been a parent or has a parent has made poor choices. We apologize and try and do better next time. Wish I could say I was the perfect parent but there were times when I was tired or stressed or angry. Said things that were hurtful. Not proud just human. Wish I could go back and do it over again. Just move forward and try to do better. Why is it Woody allen gets away for sexually abusing his children. but Brad is investigated for saying hurtful things? Was CPS called when Alec Baldwin called his daughter a pig?
They also kind of alluded to it in the initial articles. That he was ‘bad cop’ and imposed rules, structure, ect and she was the ‘good cop’ that didn’t care about those things. They specifically added she never yelled.
How exactly does the existence of Woody Allen and Alec Baldwin negate Brad´s abuse of his children? There are no connections between the cases? — Other than their privilege of being white rich men and therefore getting a pass for all kinds of abuse. But just because there are more terrible men out in the world doesn´t mean everyone else should be able to do “lesser” evils.
I’m wondering what this verbal abuse is also? I cring at how many people speak to their kids. If speaking nasty to your kids was reason to lose them, there would be millions of orphans.
@sunnyd
If you don’t click, I won’t click.
Whatever. All I know is that everyone who sneared at the “troubled marriage” reports over the last few years is eating major crow. Either he has been abusive for awhile or she is pulling some parental alienation but either way, none of that happens in a marriage that was once healthy.
But when you talk about people who sneered at gossip stories eating major crow, it makes it sound like this is all some game. This isn’t a game, this is the dissolution of a family with 6 kids.
It’s quite possible that once healthy marriage/relationship can deteriorate in a short period of time if a person starts drinking heavily or abusing substances. It doesn’t mean he wasn’t a good father before.
I agree with this. I don’t think Angie would have kept having children with him if there was any question he was abusive. No way.
Have we heard if he’s in rehab? God, I hope everyone’s availing themselves of all the help they can. As more gets revealed, that’s my only hope for the family right now.
@ GingerCrunch — I doubt if he is in rehab, as he voluntarily submitted to drug testing & has come back clean each time. If Brad is tested, I wonder if Angie has to submit to the tests as well. Who is leaking all this sensitive information?
Yeah I agree with this. Although it’s unlikely the issues (drugs, alcohol) arose out of nowhere. Perhaps they were latent for a while (during the early honeymoon period and when the kids were all younger) and then stress/frustration/who knows what kicked in and drove him to start using again. When people fall off the wagon, in my experience at least, it doesn’t take long for sh*t to hit the fan.
Still I feel, I dunno, sort of shocked and saddened that he’s been verbally abusive. I hadn’t pictured him as that type of person and of course, it comes down to the fact that none of us know these people. A lot of it is an illusion.
Actually most of the gossip about them quieted down in the last few years so we really don’t know how much of the tabloid stories were accurate.
…actually, this proves that most of those “troubled marriage” reports were completely baseless. As always, the truth about these two only comes out when it’s straight from the source. As a longtime fan, I never claimed to know anything for sure about them… but I did know one thing: they keep their private lives on lock. They had a wedding and major surgeries without a single leak. Tabloids had no idea about his anger issues or his abuse; they were too busy obsessing over exes and painting her as a manipulative demon.
Yes, this! The tabloids never seemed to have a clue about what was really going on with these two. They spent years shrieking that Brangelina was on the rocks, and yet the couple themselves just kept sailing along in apparent bliss, doing charity work and having babies. And then when real trouble did erupt, it always came straight out of the blue.
So even though the break-up did surprise me, I’m not “eating major crow” about all the years of faulty shrieking. The tabloids consistently had it wrong.
This poor family 🙁
It’s stopped being fodder for gossip long ago.
Team Kids.
Well dang…
Eh, the truth probably lies somewhere in the middle.
Verbal abuse is something DCFS investigates for? I get that this is just one part of a larger ongoing investgation, but DCFS would need a lot more funding to investigate every parent who occassionally made their kids feel worthless with a few well timed insults.
Yeah, I’m surprised too.
Ned reference: Even in the newest Harry Potter book, Harry has an argument with his teenage son and say that he “wishes he’d never been born.” He regrets it later of course, but if Harry FREAKING Potter can say something like that in a fight with his son I’m sure a lot of parents have!
Harry Potter has a teenage son?! That is the news to me! 🙂
The rest I just feel some of this is a power play being played through the media and time will tell. And yes, parents can be verbally abusive, but often it is not labeled * abuse *.
@tmc – at the end of Deathly Hallows (book 7) the do a chapter on Harry and his life 19 years later. He married Jenny Weasley and has 3 children – 2 boys, James and Albus and a girl, Lily. They are at the train station saying good bye to the two boys who are off to Hogwarts. James is maybe 13 and Albus is 11.
Harry Potter and the Cursed Child came out fairly recently and in it he is an adult with a family.
I certainly hope Harry didn’t say that while his son was still in the room. You can’t take it back if they heard it.
My mother used to say that to me all the time when I was a child. Which is just one of the reasons that when I grew up, we had no relationship to speak of. I do not need that kind of negativity in my life.
+1 Carmen. I’m side-eyeing that people tend to normalize being verbally abusive to their kids. I mean, if you want to be estranged from them when they’re adults, by all means . . (I don’t care if you’re stressed, etc, there is no justification for saying to their face that you wish your dependent did not exist. That being said, I think poor health care for mental health issues is mixed up in these things, so it should be addressed on that level too, and that requires a decent healthcare system. But I don’t think the child’s perspective should be trivialized. Maybe it was just words said in a time of stress in the parent’s view, but in the kid’s view it is utterly shocking and a breach of trust, in my experience.)
Yep they do, the entire situation is sad.
Several years ago my roommate from college3 had DFS called on her and her husband. They lived in an apartment and someone heard her daughter crying (she was having a fit over something). They did not close their case for at least 3 months and they had monthly visits. This because a neighbor heard a child crying. So it does not surprise me that this has not been closed yet. But what surprises me, unless someone is just now coming forward with the verbal abuse accusation, that this is just now coming out. Seems to me that they would have been making sure they had talked to everyone within the first couple weeks and that is when this all would have been brought to light. Maybe I’m wrong in thinking this way.
I had a parent who never laid a finger on me but I lived most of my childhood walking on eggshells and absolutely terrified of their temper. I understand it’s not the same as physical or sexual abuse but we were paralyzed by fear a lot of the time and it had a major impact on my life.
Same experience here. Thankfully my husband is understanding. He knows that yelling at me only results in a total shutdown due to my past. 8 years together and he yelled once. After that, I explained my past and how I feel and he has never done it since. I’m very lucky and it has resulted in great communication between us
Yes, the reason why physical abuse is harmful is because of the psychological terror it creates, as much as the injuries. So it’s no less traumatizing to just terrorize the child, without hitting them. The bruises heal; the mental anguish is what lingers for decades, regardless of what type of abuse caused it.
Anna, being terrified of your parents´temper is absolutely an experience of abuse. It is in no way less valid/real than physical or sexual abuse. It absolutely sends a child into stress and survival mode because they never feel safe and are never allowed to develop a sense of self. I am sorry you had to go trough such a difficult childhood, I hope you are doing better now.
Emotional and psychological abuse is just as bad as physical abuse.
It depends on the nature, frequency and intensity of the statements, and maybe in the context of the speaker’s condition as well (IE drunk, drugged etc.). If the verbal abuse included threatening language, that would be taken very seriously.
Bettyrose, that hadn’t even occurred to me (need more caffeine!), but you’re right. They already have insanely heavy caseloads; if verbal abuses needed to be investigated as well, CPS would need to hire an army.
IMO either there’s more to it, or they are being SUPER thorough since this is such a high-profile case?
They are being super thorough because it is so high profile, it is probably a huge pain to investigate, and they have other cases that triage as higher priority. The LA County DCFS office went on a one day ‘unity break’ a few months ago and their caseload was one of the cheif complaint was their current caseload constituted a child safety crisis although they did go back to work, even though they knew the bulk of their requests will never be granted, because those people are HEROS. They actually protect and serve despite the fact that all they deal with is the most dangerous and despised police work without the
-budget
-salary
-safety
-backing (This was their inspiration for unity day. Police have unions so when they commit extrajudicial executions they get paid leave are rarely indicted and usually aquitted. Case workers are always the first one thrown under the bus when the system fails and are then fired and indicted)
-extensive on the job training/budget and time for retraining yearly
-legal authority
-public support
-general public being wildly misinformed about what they actually do (which can make their jobs harder I.e. the study that showed over a third of doctors, despite being mandatory reporters, won’t report it a child abuse unless the child tells them)
Anyway, it is California state policy as well as the recommendation of numerous social work professional groups that any individual case worker should have a maximum of 14 open cases at any given time. Beyond that the caseworker is stretched to thin and can’t be as thorough as they need to be because of everything that is involved. Their average caseloads ranged from 24 to 30. That is actually amazing, in other counties the average can be as high a 70! They simply don’t have the resources to begin policing verbal abuse until children start showing signs of serious emotional damage.
They are required to investigate every report but if they were anyone else they would have referred them to a family therapist and mediated a custody agreement and ground rules for their behavior around the children. They possibly would have done random drug screening but if he passed a urine test it would mean he hadn’t had a drink in 72 hours and if he were an alcoholic he would be going through visible signs of DTs. At that point an alcoholic would be near the peak of his withdrawal symptoms – which for alcohol are severe and life threatening. It would also indicate he had not smoked in at least seven days (and if it had only been seven days and he tested clean it would mean that he is an extremely casual smoker, a few times a month max). So the results would substantiate his protestation of a substance abuse issue. So even then they might recommend a few AA meetings to be safe and close the case.
In this case they know that the children have nannies and body guards, access to clean water and food, two stable enough parents that have agreed to work with them and follow their advice. They don’t have any reason to suspect they are in imminent danger. Other children in their caseloads are not so fortunate. Their priority is going to be on the kids in danger of being killed due to abuse or neglect and expediting their investigations into parents who are unwilling to follow their recommendations.
There is also probably a bit of gawking going on. Not that they are being unprofessional but seeing Brad and Angelina’s homes, being invited into their world, seeing a side of them the public doesn’t get to see is a bit more interesting then the mostly awful “regular” people that they see. It is also relatively light compared to a lot of stuff they have seen. These kids have two parents who love and adore them, the resources to take care of them and hire professionals if needed, and for all his faults Brad Pitt isn’t some tweaker coming off a week long meth bender that sees you as the face of the organization trying to take his kids away so he makes threats or worse, leaving you constantly looking over your shoulder.
Thank you fro that insight Lindsay.
I would like to ask you all American commentators:
Is it normal for authorities to get involve in family incidents in US? Is this not a sign that something serious went on? If so, forget who she is or he is. Considering the hate crimes for women tops all others on this small rock we all live, why are you ladies still coming up with excuses for the male counterpart?
Because they refuse to let go of the perfect image SHE created for him.
yet people believe angie is behind this because her initial strategy to smear brad didnt work…… poor woman she cant win either way. i applaud her for pulling the plug on the marriage
People don’t know what to think because of the disconnect between the perfect family PR, from AJ’s own lips very recently, and these new damning accusations. Because it is part of a custody dispute, and contradicts AJ’s own words on BP’s marvelous parenting, many people, reasonably, aren’t willing to take sides until there is more concrete information.
So what if she said he was a great dad do you realise people change.
blaming her for praising brad in the past is pathetic.
@Paradon I’m not blaming her?? I’m just saying not believing the accusations against him because she praised him in the past is silly.
Nobody here knows how he really is behind closed doors.
ok im so sorry i misunderstood you
Someone filed a complaint and so there was an investigation. There has to be an investigation when allegations are made. We are now hearing there may have been verbal abuse. We will see how it plays out.
There are a lot of women here that just didn’t want to jump to calling someone a criminal without actual proof. A lot of people believed these two were good parents.
Exactly this.
The Jolie-Pitt relationship failed obviously but, outside of an anonymously reported incident, until the investigation is over then that is all we know for sure.
Everything about these updates makes the situation harder for those children, no matter what. I feel for them.
@LaLu.
There is an investigation going on right now, there is no past tense as it is still on going.
We already knew of reports of him getting in Maddox’s face, which Brad did not even try to deny. Do you think he was silent and angrily staring at him during that event?
You will never get what you are seeking because you are not actually a part of the investigation and will never have access to every file and other documents to get “actual proof”. We all are just bystanders watching them clean up the train wreck that Brad caused. And let’s be honest, if it was anyone but Angelina would “a lot of people” be working so hard to bend over backwards to make her the villain in this situation.
It is perfectly fine that “a lot of people” don’t want to jump to conclusions in calling Brad a criminal. But “a lot of people” also should not pounce to cast aspersions on Angelina as if she is in the wrong for this whole situation.
It is perfectly fine that “a lot of people” don’t want to jump to conclusions in calling Brad a criminal. But “a lot of people” also should not pounce to cast aspersions on Angelina as if she is in the wrong for this whole situation.
Thank you for this
Yeah, they always looked really loving and so happy. Its hard for me to believe things were this bad and we never had a clue. Plus. My dad slapped me when i was a kid, dfs was called. I was taken and put into foster care, my dad pled guilty to a misdemeanor. And he never beat me or verbally abused me. So imo, just because of my experience, i don’t think just because they were called, that that means that person was an necessarily an abuser. Sometimes, yes, but also people sometimes call dfs on a parent just to be shitty.
It is relatively commonplace for DCFS to conduct an investigation. They are legally obligated to after a complaint has been filed. It is also commonplace for the investigations to be open ended. They are working to protect the child(ren) and want to have room to investigate more than the reported incident and also be able to perform welfare checks well past the incident to ensure the situation is under control and it is still a safe environment. However, it is rare that they make a recommendation of charges being filed.
No, it isn’t a definitive sign something serious went on. People who don’t know the whole story, disagree with parenting methods or have some kind of agenda can see abuse or neglect where there is no, err on the side of caution or file false reports for their own personal agenda. Around 40-50%, with some children’s advocate agencies going as high as 70%, of the alleged abuse is found to be false or unsubstantiated. Personally, I tend to think it is at the lower end. When divorce lawyers and their clients are using Temporary Orders of Protection as a strategy people get jaded to abuse claims that are reported at the end of a marriage. It hurts the spouse and real victims. Not that I believe this particular situation is a complete fabrication.
http://www.saveservices.org/downloads/False-DV-Allegations-Cost-20-Billion
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/liz-mandarano/the-worst-thing-a-woman-c_b_837636.html
This wasn’t a hate crime against women. Reserving judgement seems prudent. In Johnny Depps case we actually saw evidence. Labeling him a bad guy no questions asked doesn’t help anyone. His drug test show the substance abuse alligations were untrue. My main issue was people vilifying the DCFS case workers who have an extremely hard job to justify her actions. The story and timeline have changed so many times that it is obvious we aren’t hearing the whole story.
Thank you for the explanation. I did not mean to suggest this was a hate crime. I just wanted to comment on the status of women in general and the message we are getting from all the comments. What I get from all this is, we, the women will never have a united front to end crimes against women, because we gleefully rip each other apart any chance we get. This woman has been working to help those who are abused/raped/kicked out/killed for many years. Who cares what she is like.! At least she was doing something. Now it is our turn to support her.
@Lindsay, all very good points and thank you for the link.
My thought was that this might be taking longer than a typical investigation because of the sheer scope of this family’s lifestyle.
Think about it: how many different cities, countries they’ve lived in over the past few years. How many employees they must have had who spent significant amounts of time with the children (and it could take some time to track down former employees in, say, France or Malta). It is simply far more complicated, logistically, than many other cases might be.
Add in the intense media scrutiny and probably numerous NDAs, plus possibly having to involve child welfare agencies abroad (I have no idea if this is the case or not), and it really might just be taking a long time not because Brad did anything especially heinous but just because, well, it’s taking a long time to conduct a thorough investigation under these circumstances.
Even the initial plane incident was, IIRC, complicated by the fact that they were literally crossing state lines as it happened. There are just layers upon layers of issues with this one.
Agree, Lorelei.
Between Lorelai and Lindsay this whole thing now makes a lot more sense. Thanks!
Agreed!
This is all just so sad. Brad and Angie are experienced enough to cope with this, but the poor kids don’t deserve this kind of public attention.
Sad if true,makes sense as to why Angelina did what she did..she had no choice really..Seems it was a protect Brad or the kids & as any responsible mother does(With the adequate means)she “chose”her kids…..sad…
these poor kids 🙁
Verbal abuse, like psychological, leaves no visible marks but it’s just as damaging as physical abuse.
I hope the leakings stop because this matter is very serious and their children do not deserve to have their experiences and issues laundered publicly for all to see.
I will probably stop commenting on posts about them excepting those related to their professional projects.
This is just sad.
No family is perfect but I thought Brad seemed to be a good father.
From my own personal experience with Child Protective Services, divorce and custody issues, verbal abuse is huge. My ex threatened my kids with all kinds of horrible things. CPS interviewed everyone, the Court weighed in and my ex no longer has any visitation rights. While verbal abuse doesn’t leave visible scars, the abuse is still scary and wrong. And it’s never a one time event.
Thank you for sharing your experience with us. your kids should be proud to have a mum like you…. i see people are still down playing the whole thing smh…
I think the tabloids have made this so much worse. They are just speculating & trying to outdo each other for scoops. There was no end date for the investigation which in touch have fabricated that they have extended the case. Where as legal experts have said that this is child services standard way of working. I choose to believe legal experts familar with the child services, than a trash tabloid who is just looking to stir things for profit. Tmz are just as bad. I do not believe they have angelina sources right now, instead just paid off people in legal departments to get a gist of what might be happening, to spin things for hits. I send the family prayers & best wishes to get through this & to stay strong. Wish the tabloid press would stop being able to get away with writing lies, especially about a situation as serious as this.
Ok. So there was, possibly, a private pattern here.
And the incident on the plane – it seems – was the point at which this story was going to break & become PUBLIC. I wonder what role – if any – that played in Angelina’s decision to file.
I wonder if she felt her hand was forced.
I, too, feel very sad reading this & feel the tabloid attention is not fair to the kids involved. I won’t comment on these stories in the future.
I will probably get yelled at for this, but I feel badly for Brad. It just seems that he stands a very good chance of never having a relationship, at least with some of his children, ever again. Of course, you can argue that he brought this on himself, which very well may be, but every indication he has presented to the public is that he loves being a father and adores all of his children and is completely fascinated by them. I don’t think he acted that for public consumption. It seems very genuine with him. That said, he likely does have some alcohol and drug issues that get in the way. He may feel very overwhelmed with teenagers and loses his temper and says things he may wish he could take back. I know those moments take a toll on children, and they have every right to cut their father out of their lives if they feel that is what is best for them. I just can’t help but feel that Brad wants very badly to maintain a strong bond with his children, not just for appearances sake, but because he truly loves them and does not want to miss out on their lives.
Well, I agree with you. He needs to work on himself and repair the relationship with his kids. People make mistakes in their life and if they want to change there is always hope.
I don’t disagree, but his issue now is that he’s not taking responsibility for his actions. Until he does that and takes action to repair the relationship(s), it’s not going to happen.
You don’t know that. Every indication is that his is taking this seriously. He could have not followed DCFS recommendations, not agreed to therapy, not agreeing to drug test. It is hard for most normal people to admit real, serious problems even to themselves, it isn’t malicious, it is a coping mechanism. For someone like Brad Pitt who has had his ego built up probably felt ten feet tall and bullet proof. That is a good start. A lot of people never get that far. If he wants to atone privately he has every right to do so.
I agree with you and I do feel sorry for him, that being said he has to take responsibility for his behavior and overcome this. Ultimately it’s up to him.
oops…wrong space
@Rhiley, no yelling from me. I agree with exactly what You, Luca76, OhDear, and Sarar said.
It is possible to both condemn his actions yet still feel sorry for him…that’s what some commenters don’t seem to understand.
I can feel sorry for him that this is how his life turned out, but that doesn’t mean at *all* that I’m defending his actions or condoning abuse. The two feelings aren’t mutually exclusive.
But he is an abuser, so why feel bad for him? When Depp situation was the story of the day no one had sympathy for him when it was believed that he attacked an adult. No one gave a damn that he had substance issues. It didn’t matter that he had a rep of being a good person before all this or that he did not have a history of beating his exes. It didn’t matter that even Heard and her friend said that when he was sober he was gentle and kind. It didn’t matter that even Heard said she only told her friends about the abuse afterwords and that they never witness Depp actually hitting her nor did it matter that the police saw no signs of abuse when they were called. Depp was and still is considered a monster for actions he has continued to claim to be innocent of to this day.
But Pitt actually got into it with a child. Think about that. He is a grown man and he got into a fight with a child. Now it looks like he has been terrorizing more of his kids. He has also been taking shots at the mother of his own children for having the audacity to protect her kids and he gets sympathy? He gets understanding ? This isn’t some average Joe that has to come home from work and then deal with his kids. He has a team of nannies, he works a job where he has loads of downtime between gigs. If he is getting too upset about one of the kids he can just go tell the nannies to watch the kids and go to the other side of the mansion or to the guest house and cool off until he is calm enough to deal with his kids in a rational manner. If his substance situation is an issue he has the money and resource to take a whole year off and go to the best facility to do deal with that.
He could have done what he needed to do to prevent his kids from having to deal with all of this, but he didn’t. So if you want to have sympathy that’s cool, but I personally don’t get it especially when there are actual witnesses to his abuse and he has been made to admit that he took things too far with his own son.
Very Well Said!
Yes, because getting into it with your teenager is super unusual? I used to make my parents crazy as a kid. Parents don’t go to school to become perfect parents. Parents get into disagreements with their children and they might even yell. Kids get into trouble sometimes. I personally think Angelina likes to parent her children as special snowflakes and Brad is probably old fashioned about kids having opinions and there the two clash. I think these investigations are overreactions. We all like to pretend to be perfect but in real life, every single one of us has seen their parent drunk a few times or exercise poor judgement or get angry because they’re human beings.
I think part of what made Depp a very unsympathetic person is that he brought forward one person after another after another after another to say that he was not an abusive jackhole and therefore Amber Heard must be a liar and that she is setting him up to fall all the while slurring his way through one interview after another. He was a complete bully trying to paint Amber as a flaky bisexual slut who used him to get a break in Hollywood. Brad Pitt isn’t throwing is estranged wife and their children under the bus by accusing them of lying. He isn’t trying to paint himself as a saint. Julia Roberts, Matt Damon, George Clooney aren’t giving interviews on his behalf. Certainly, only time will tell if he can pull himself together and make the needed changes to maintain a relationship with his children, but it is very likely a lot of damage has been and he may lose contact with some if not all of them. And should that be the case I would feel badly for all of them including Brad.
@Sassback: Is it normal that when one get’s into it with a teen that they destroy property in the process? Because Pitt messed up parts of the plane during his altercation with his son. My point is why does Pitt get sympathy for “being human” as you put it for getting drunk, getting into fights, verbal abuse towards several minors but Depp is a monster? If Depp is condemned for his actions towards a grown up, shouldn’t Pitt be similarly condemned and treated like Depp when Pitt attacked a child who is even more defenseless and the effects of abuse towards them can more severely warp their developing brain and sense of self especially since it came at the hands of a trusted loved one who above any other person is supposed to be their protector?
@Rhiley: I’m sure after seeing the way the people that stood up for Depp were treated no one would jump to Pitt’s defense even if they wanted to. Both Pitt and Jolie have mostly likely learned from that divorce on what to allow in order to not get the public anger aimed at them.
Plus only Del Toro said she was lying, his other friends where just talking about the person they knew him to be, which is no different then when Pitt had his sources telling the tabs that they think he is a great father in US weekly and People mag. Besides maybe the reason none of those famous people jumped to Pitt’s defense is because they aren’t real friends. Clooney, in particular, even said that he and Pitt only hangout when they are working. So why would an occasional work colleague put their neck out for someone he isn’t even close to?
Pitt has tried to minimize the severity of his actions at every turn and has painted her up to be unnecessarily reactionary, as being manipulative and only doing this in order to move to London for her political career, has attacked her friends, etc. Sure you will say well this was what was put in tabs and they are all lying , but when those same tabs were putting out those stories of Depp not being okay with Heard bisexuality and other tales they were believed as if he had gone on record to give those quotes to the tabs himself. Plus AJ has had several named sources (ex. her manager) speak publicly on her behalf so I don’t see why it is hard to believe that both Pitt and Jolie are leaking still and that Pitt is attacking his wife the same way people thought Depp was.
@Jinni, speaking only for myself, I feel sorry for him because addiction is a disease. In no way am I defending any abusive behavior toward his wife or children (or anyone in his life, for that matter).
I’ve grown up watching him and he seemed to be a generally nice enough guy and happy with fatherhood. Obviously, something changed. And if it is true that substance abuse played a large role in all this, I do feel as sorry for him as I would feel for someone with cancer because as I said above, addiction is a disease. I hope he gets help for it and that he can someday repair his relationship with his children.
As I said in another comment, it is possible to condemn his actions completely yet still feel some sympathy for the fact that he ended up here.
Having sympathy ≠ defending.
What parts of the plane were messed up?
I also heard he took off in the fuel truck but they later said that didn’t happen.
@Lorelai: I understand that sympathy doesn’t equal defending. I’m just wonder why Pitt’s admitted abuse is getting such a different reaction to Depp’s abuse allegations, when Pitt actually attacked an infinitely more defenseless person then Depp imho. Why is okay to essentially blame Maddox, which is what one is doing when they are saying or implying that this is all due to teenagers acting up, but when people were trying to say Head goaded Depp that was called victim blaming and that he should have better control over his emotions. However, it’s considered understandable and defenseable that Pitt ( an adult) can’t always control his actions towards a teenager. That’s where I am coming from.
@Lalu: I read it on Lainey who got from the printed version of the US weekly pro-Brad story they printed the week of Sept 28th, 2016. This detail was not released in the online version but was in the hard copy of the mag itself.
http://www.laineygossip.com/US-Weeklys-new-cover-featuring-Brad-Pitt-and-Angelina-Jolie-split-is-demonstrably-and-undeniably-pro-Pitt/45069
Imho, if it wasn’t true I don’t think US weekly, who has been on his side, would have put that out there.
@Jinni, I guess I am not following your logic because for me having sympathy for Brad does not equal blaming Maddox for not wanting to see his father. I think it is pretty clear that Angelina is always going to have a relationship with her children, or at least for now it seems that way. But at this point, it seems very likely that Brad may not be able maintain a relationship with all of his children going forward. I don’t blame his children. I don’t blame Angelina. Brad obviously has a lot of issues he needs to work on in order to repair his relationship with his children, but Brad has always credited his family for his accomplishments, and he has had tremendous accomplishments over the years, which is also something that differentiates him from Johnny Depp. Since becoming a father, Brad has repaired New Orleans, created some of the greatest films of the last 20 years, and has helped to fight the atrocities in Darfur, Haiti and other devastated countries. He seemed genuinely concerned with making the world better, both socially, artistically, and economically. And with all of that he has always stated how important his family has been to his success, and his true success really didn’t start until he became a father. Before fatherhood he was a pretty boy in some mildly successful films but not much else. But since fatherhood, he is a respected producer, a trusted philanthropist, and an talented actor who has a knack for choosing very interesting film roles. It seemed he was working so hard so he could make a better world for his children.
@Rhiley: I wasn’t directing my blaming Maddox comment towards you really just the people that keep saying this is all because of teens acting like teens. Which to me isn’t an excuse for popping off at your kid bad enough to merit a DCFS investigation.
As for Brad charity work, that has nothing to do with his being a good father or not and has everything to do with him typically taking on the interest of his current partner. Jolie was really big into charity so he became the same way. Besides of course Pitt would make a big deal about his role as a father since that was the reason he made the public believe was behind leaving his wife and what he built his entire new image since getting with Jolie on. Also, Depp had his greatest success after becoming a father just like Pitt. Depp wasn’t a blockbuster box office success before he got with Paradis and settled down. He also use to say how his family grounded him like Pitt and it’s obvious that was true since after Paradis he became a hot mess. But Pitt f-ed up while still with Jolie and his family.
Sure Pitt has said all of those nice things about being a father and what not but these events on the plane and the fact that DCFS are expanding their investigation into his treatment of the other kids only shows that like most things in Hollywood that was just an image or for show for the public to eat up.
It’s looking like to me the biggest difference between Depp’s situation and Pitt’s is that since Pitt has always had a good guy rep ( unlike Depp who had a bad boy rep before getting with Vanessa) until now, that that is what is making people so much quicker to believe the best of him and give him the benefit of the doubt. Because if Depp is an abuser with the evidence against him and is now to be boycotted and maligned so should Pitt be. That’s all I am saying.
Although I think it’s the right decision to get him out of the kids’ lives until he can be a great father again, you’re right that he wasn’t pretending to adore his kids. It’s arguably part of why he broke up with Jen Aniston; he was baby-mad and she didn’t appear to want kids. (I remember about a year before they split, he had mentioned in the press how much he wanted children, and Melissa Etheridge has also said in the press that Brad was yearning for kids so much that she didn’t want to use him as a sperm donor with her partner because she didn’t want Brad inserting himself into their family.)
Agree with you Jinni,@Sassback
My mother may have said she has problems with me as a teen, but if she would have shown more love to me as a child maybe she would have had no problem. You get what you put out.
feel bad for brad? if he has done anything wrong then i dont see how anyone can feel sorry for him. feel sorry for the fact that once again angelina is being portrayed so negatively in the press – feel sorry that people are saying that she wants to “destroy” brad etc – if there was no issues at all then the investigation may have finished up but the fact that it is being expanded sd mean that brad has issues to deal with. if maddox doesnt want to see brad then i think he is justified – only time will tell
My first husband and I were married twenty years ago today. Within six months, i realized that I’d married an emotionally and verbally abusive mess. He thrived on bullying me in order to make himself feel better. He refused to consider therapy… until the day I told him I didn’t love him anymore and was leaving. When I called him abusive, he laughed. “It’s not like I beat you or anything… even though I wanted to.” Yikes. I feel bad for the woman he’s married to now.
Yuck, ptooey, spitting on your first husband. Glad you moved on.
I’m very glad to hear that he’s now your EX husband!
I had the same problem – after year 2 of being married my ex decided that verbally abusing me was his new hobby. I waited and begged him to go to therapy – it took another 2 years before i just left him for good. Why waste time with someone who didnt care? it affects one a lot
I start to think that they had a lot of problems before the wedding and the wedding was more like a photo op.
I agree. I think the wedding was a last ditch effort to save a marriage that wasn’t working. People have an image of Angelina that she is a straightforward and honest woman and I believe that as well, but I do think public image and embarrassment over trying to legitimize their relationship pushed them to keep on going in a marriage that should have ended a couple years back. Like they started with a black cloud over their head and every interview was PR touting this amazing relationship they had, justifying the infidelity. They cared as much about what people thought of that as the crazy Aniston fans did, really.
Yep, I also think they married to save their relationship and because their children wanted them to marry but that never work.
@sassback
This isn’t at all accurate IMO, and much flies in the face of reason.
1) If they had such a desire to ‘legitimize their relationship,’ (and by the way I disagree with your characterization that they felt they were somehow illegit) felt “embarrassment,” or were overly concerned about “public image” as unmarried partners as you describe. If they felt that way, they would not have *waited a decade* for the paper.
2) For you to say “every interview was PR…to justify the infidelity,”would be a fairly giant leap into their psyche even if they themselves believed they had cheated and committed adultery. Since they claim they had no affair (and Brad’s ex concurs) that makes this hypothesis as cruel as it is presumptuous and factually wrong.
3) I GET that a lot of resentful types want to now revise history and sweep the ‘epic love story’ part under the rug as if it never happened (to experience this glee, play Chelsea Handler’s bizarrely obsessed rant)- but you really don’t get to do that.
4) It IS possible to be very much in love, have had a great run and then get torn asunder by, for example, a growing alcohol addiction and/or substance abuse problem.
Sorry to all the usual suspects…but that fact, if true, still wouldn’t negate all that had come before in the previous 12 years.
They themselves stated that it was more important to the children than it was to them to be legally married, and they mentioned this numerous times over the years. I remember them saying (in a joking way) that the kids had been “pestering” them to get married for years.
And wasn’t the wedding itself sort of kid-centric? The children drew on Angelina’s gown, and I think I remember reading somewhere (here?) that the kids even wrote their vows.
I’m not saying the wedding was the cause of their current situation by any means, but it did come across as somewhat forced.
The wedding absolutely came across as forced. It was what the children wanted. I remember much was written about what the children wanted, to the point that it seemed the children ran the show…there were no adults in the house. Parents are needed to lead & set a good solid example. When you leave everything up to the kids you are escaping your own responsibility & putting it squarely on the children. Children (hopefully) don’t raise themselves or you end up with an Oliver Twist type situation, which is not fair to the children & shameful behavior for the parents.
It may have been that the children were lobbying for the marriage in unconscious or conscious hopes that the ceremony would cement and save the relationship (like a couple getting pregnant to save the marriage). Wishful thinking, but won’t fix something that’s really and truly broken. That’s what I think happened, and because I could see Brad and Angie rationalizing trying to go through with it out of the love they have for the kids. Like The Parent Trap, only to the nth power.
Actually, CPS investigations can’t be “open ended”- by law, they have to come to a decision w/in usually a 45/60 day window after accepting the report for investigation. It could be that other reports have come in, and those have also been accepted, and hence a separate investigation into the new allegations. Even if there are no “findings” against Pitt to warrant continued CPS involvement, this family has a lot of healing to do.
Well, the TMZ report stated that the investigation is being expanded to include the whole family, including Angelina, based on incidents that were allegedly witnessed by one or more of the six kids. If true, this is unreal! I admit, I bought the kool aid! I thought they were this perfect family. I would have been surprised if B and A, had split up over an affair, but this…this I never would have imagined.
I wonder if the fighting between the parents might be an issue. The kids have probably witnessed some doozies. I’m still finding it hard to believe that either parent was verbally abusive toward the kids, but I guess we just don’t know.
yep…looks like both Angie & Brad will be investigated, as it should be. I remember reading about their (supposed) epic fights. Brad running away, crying. Angie always painted Brad as the perfect husband & father & now? There are two adults in this relationship & both played a part in its’ demise. Poor kids.
Sad. Also sad that they kept their family life pretty much private and now when they need privacy more than ever, it’s all out there for the public to leer at.
conspiracy theory: for years we heard about how jennifer aniston wouldn’t give brad pitt the family he always wanted b/c she selfishly wanted a career. i don’t doubt that isn’t partially true. i think she is happily childless and it was smart to strike while the iron was hot post-friends. BUT – maybe, just maybe – she knew that brad pitt wouldn’t be the best father based on his temperament – or that they together would not be good parents and that was part of the reason, in her prime childbearing years, she chose not to have kids with him. at the time she knew him a lot longer than angie (who made him daddy within months of being together), had experience with a highly dysfunctional parental relationship and maybe had better judgement on it.
ps – not a team aniston person – i love angelina jolie and i think this whole situation is tragic.
Interesting and well-thought out theory. Food for thought, Brangeloonies!
Lizzie that is an interesting theory!
I think Brad still loves Angie but Angie stopped loving Brad at some point. It really seems that she wants out of this marriage. Poor children.
So you think it’s her fault and he did nothing wrong?
No, I just think she doesn’t love him anymore – for whatever reason.
@gronki
The reason couldn’t be more obvious.
I don’t know what’s going on behind closed doors or what happened on the plane. It’s funny that some people think they do.
It’s just so hard to imagine Brad not being perfect because we know him SOOO well because of his movie roles and he always plays such a great guy. AND since Angelina is clearly Maleficient and a Girl Interrupted.
Sarcasm.
So tired of the “when in doubt, blame the female” excuse.
What are you talking about? I only said that I think she doesn’t love him anymore. It happens, you know.
@Gronki how nasty bitch! Why doesn´t she love him anymore? #sarcasm
Our misogynist culture sucks.
Just want to share that I’m having a hard time coping with this story. It’s bringing up all kinds of self-questioning for me, beginning with, “Why do I care so much?!” Honestly, I realize that I don’t actually know these people, but their split feels so personal. Perhaps it’s because Angie (and Brad) symbolize certain deep, psychological archetypes for me. Perhaps I was attached to them as symbols of beauty, strength and empowerment. Perhaps it’s bringing up dark memories of my own divorce story, and abusive dad history. Or maybe it’s just that, like most of us here, I believed the myth of Brangelina and their Amazing Family. So, maybe I feel betrayed? But of course that is ridiculous, because, again, I DON’T KNOW THESE PEOPLE!!! (At least not in “real life”.) I kind of feel like a loser, caring so much about it, following the story, being a total voyeur…but their split is really bothering me. What the hell?
I think I feel the same way. It’s weird. I really believed what I saw of them, it made sense. Alas, I’m now having to question some of my long held ideals about true partnership. Hopefully it will pass.
This is such a tragedy for those children. And DCFS should be ashamed of their staff. This info has to be leaking from their agency. They’re supposed to be protecting the best interests and confidentiality and privacy of these children. Opposing counsel in these cases often can’t get a copy of DCFS records as part of discovery without a court hearing and order but these social workers and case managers and whomever in the agency are running to the tabs to spill on this situation and investigation? So gross. This is already likely a horrible, confusing time for the children and now DCFS is making it a thousand times worse by violating their privacy and confidentiality and leaking the details of their situation to the tabloid media.
TMZ, which seems to be getting most of the dirt, has a nasty history of embedding moles in the justice system — i.e. people who worked for TMZ before and after working in some law firm office or the court house.
I wonder if something similar is going on here. Who ever it is leaking information about a child abuse investigation in order to enrich themselves should go to prison for it — and their ghost-employers at TMZ too, if possible. It’s so disgusting.
Tbh reading comments here leaves me puzzled. Perhaps it’s because i consider myself a well-adjusted adult, albeit with my own set of issues. I thought I had a normal life, though it included my quick-tempered father and passive-aggressive mother. Just because they had a me doesn’t mean they experienced a shift in their core personalities.
Comments here make me wonder if everyone’s overreacting, or if my life was way more abusive than I can comprehend.
I’ve forgiven my own parents though, and I love them both to the bone. But this Brangelina situation and the media and opinions surrounding it make me sad. I’m glad my parents weren’t famous. They’re deeply flawed and broken in their own way, but they’re not bad people.
I do feel a bit weird that this particular celeb divorce makes me feel so sad though. I wish it wasn’t so public. I always hated it when I had to be confronted with the crapshow, and just because these kids’ parents are filthy rich doesn’t mean they’re not.. well, children. With emotions.
No one is perfect and I think a lot of people have had experiences like you are speaking of. My mom screamed and yelled. She would also give me the shirt off her back today still. My dad wasn’t all that available and I consider him selfish, but he loved me very much and I adore him.
I scream and yell sometimes at my child out of frustration. I am not proud of it at all, but if I am being honest, I am far from a perfect mom. But I would give my life for my child… And he knows it.
Our own experiences color our perceptions of what is “over the line”. I think that’s why when I read a lot of the comments here I think people are over reacting. But to them… Maybe yelling at a child is abuse. I guess it’s a grey area.
Before the usual suspects come at me, I want to clarify… I do think that telling your kids you wish they’d never been born, they’re stupid, etc is abuse. I think that is just as awful as slapping them across the face. Those are lines I intend to never cross. But I am guilty of screaming to clean something up etc.
I dont think theres a perfect parent out there but I do believe kids need structure,discipline and boundaries. It seems to me there are a lot of parents who are afraid of their kids and are not disciplining them out of fear of being charged with abuse. Look what’s going on in the schools. Teachers have been charged with abuse simply for disciplining an unruly student. It happens and it ruins a persons career and their reputation. I know many teachers and they tell me kids have a total lack of respect compared to ten years ago.
I think all parents are guilty of losing their cool at times. Kids can really test your patience.
@Lalu I don’t think there’s anything wrong with hollering at your kids to clean their rooms. Our teachers hollered at the class all the time because of students being too loud and rowdy. But screaming in their faces would be abusive imo. A parent is so much larger and more powerful than a child, and that has to be taken into account. Also depends on the kid. I can’t stand being yelled at because I am very sensitive to noise, and I don’t think anyone else gets to erase away what feels like abuse to me, even if to them it’s easy to get over. That just means they’re not as sensitive to noise. So what? It doesn’t change my neurology. People need to accept that we experience reality differently because of the different ways we are wired. And there are other ways to discipline kids than yelling in their faces, ways that are more effective in teaching them boundaries and appropriate behaviour. After all, kids will pattern their behaviour after the examples their parents set, and if parents consistently show that yelling is a good way to show frustration with a person, that’s exactly what the kids will do when they’re forming their own relationships. Sounds unhealthy, no?
Perhaps we can agree that there is a spectrum of abuse. We can include on the low end saying something you wish you could take back – especially if it only happened once or twice, and you apologized with all your heart to your kid, etc. It happens. Parents can snap and make mistakes like anyone else.
🙁
My heart goes out to the children.
Wake me up when it’s official and not In Touch reporting.
@Pandy, I absolutely would have agreed with you 100% – before it was In Touch that was the first to report the Josh Duggar story last year. Apparently they did their research and it paid off. So we never quite know anymore!
Whatever her reason for leaving for good or bad with the kids Angelina needs to SHUT DOWN her leaks. TMZ openly stated today in their recent post that HER sources (“sources close to Angelina say…”) leaked the latest info re the ongoing investigation, and also that Maddox cut his visit with Brad short because “he didn’t want to really be there”.
Clamp it down Angie. This is what’s hurting her (and Pitt when he does it too) – the endless negative leaks designed to gain some kind of public advantage. Think of your kids and what they’ll be reading forever and always on the internet.
For those who think she has not control over her attorney or their staff, or her family, or employees or friends – save it. She has nearly full control over all of these people and what they’re saying about all of this. If they are leaking as proxies, they’re doing it with her full cooperation. (Ditto for Brad’s ‘sources’).
I agree with you. Reeks of narcissism.
And gas lighting. Only this time Brad is in the Ingrid Bergman role.
TMZ is almost certainly lying about these alleged sources, wherever they say they are coming from. “Sources close to” = tabloids inventing bullsh*t.
I think there are some leaks, from both sides, and they both need to stop it. But I also think a lot of it is made up tabloid nonsense too.
Obv you can’t tell from a snapshot but I’ve seen them with a couple of the kids (at work) and she seemed super into the kids and he seemed checked out. This was a few years ago.
Or stoned? There could be more than one reason for a person to seem mentally not-there.
Ah yes stoned parenting is healthy
The source close to DCFS that is leaking this needs to be fired. Regardless of the situation it IS NOT in the best interests of the children for this to be in the media. And DCFS sources are required to keep cases confidential. So if anyone who works for the state is leaking, their job needs to go. Unless it’s one of Angie’s or Brad’s team. At that point they should be sanctioned by the judge for releasing harmful stories. Sorry everyone, the state is doing its job and in this case I am on the children’s side. If there are issues found by DCFS than I hope for their sake the party found to need help gets it “for the kids”. Because at the end of the day, kids WANT to love their parents.
it’s been like a month and i still can’t believe this story. the “potential abuse” angle just blows my mind.
+1
If this verbal abuse included creditable reports of threats of violence or anything like threats to take the kids away without Jolie’s consent, and drugs/alcohol are involved, authorities may have solid ground to investigate. People still don’t get that DV isn’t just couples arguing–it involves things that are real crimes, like assault and kidnapping. This is why nowadays elementary school teachers have to make sure kids go home with an authorized parent/adult because unhinged domestic abusers kidnap their own kids. Welcome to 2016. I feel sorry for these kids, especially Maddox–it is bad enough to see his name come up in these reports, let alone if these stories are true. I am not a fan of either Jolie or Pitt, but I am sympathetic towards Jolie. I know too much about the deeply imbedded culture of DV in the region of the US that Pitt is from from DV survivors themselves, I cannot believe he would be immune to that sort of background just because of his fame and wealth and sadly these stories ring a bit to truthful for me.
I am hoping that an astute DCFS investigator with good clinical skills who is immune to’ political’ pressure is handling the investigation.
I can’t help but wonder why Brad and Angie got married recently (1 1/2 years ago?) after such a long non married relationship and wonder if it wasn’t an effort to salvage a souring relationship and whether it all isn’t connected with the alleged abuse report. From reports they have very different parenting styles probably based on their own upbringing and I am sure that this is factoring in too. The lawyers will advise them to embellish things and IMO, the only losers are the kids.
She said recently in a WSJ story, (maybe a year ago…I’m surprised it hasn’t been picked up in any other articles I’ve read) that she would do whatever it took for her children not to have to worry about her or feel they needed to protect her the way she did with her Mom. Looks like she kept true to her word. Period end of story. (And maybe a warning at the time to Brad??)
eeeeetrainnnn
This is probably the best comment I saw since all of this begun. And this is probably the real reason why she filed for divorce.
awhythankyou
The thing is? We don’t know if these leaks are true. It could be tabloid stirring & making assumptions. Hope all this can be cleared soon and that brad & angelina can defend & speak up for themselves against all the speculation. Their hands are tied all the time child services are fully involved. Just wish the best for the family & they come out the other side of this very soon.