The Daily Mail published another excerpt from Andrew Lownie’s Entitled: The Rise and Fall of the House of York. Early excerpts were focused on Prince Andrew, Jeffrey Epstein and (bizarrely) Prince Harry. But Lownie also has a lot of stale tea about Sarah Ferguson, the Duchess of York. While I have no doubt that Sarah is still knee-deep in all kinds of shady financial schemes, this excerpt is mostly focused on Sarah’s terrible finances in the 1990s for some reason. It’s heavy on the tabloid narratives from that decade too. I absolutely believe Sarah accumulated millions of dollars in debt through her crazy spending and equally crazy schemes, but I’m much more interested in her current schemes and how she’s supporting herself these days. I’m also interested in her own relationship (personal and financial) with Jeffrey Epstein. So far, we aren’t seeing anything about that from Lownie. But he did have this gossip about Fergie’s crushes:

On a trip to New York, Fergie asked her staff to find out if John Kennedy Jnr – handsome son of the assassinated JFK – was in town and, discovering where he was, she invited him for drinks or dinner at her hotel, which he accepted. On being told that Kennedy had a girlfriend, the actress Daryl Hannah, the duchess replied: ‘That’s not going to bother me!’ But it bothered Hannah, and Kennedy cancelled, claiming a prior engagement. Staff were then ordered to spy on his apartment all night to check that he had told the truth.

The duchess was not to be discouraged, especially after learning that Princess Diana had met Kennedy for 30 minutes at Christmas 1995 at a New York hotel. She was furious: ‘He’s mine! Why can’t she just leave him alone?’

She gave Kennedy a code name, ‘Number Nine’ – his place in the order of her lovers, with Steve Wyatt ‘Number One’ – and spent hours scouring magazines for articles about him, cutting out pictures of him in his swimming trunks and talking to her friends about whether he would like different aspects of her personality.

A close confidante revealed: ‘She’ll suddenly ask, “Do you think Ken will mind that I don’t like such and such a thing?” It’s incredibly real to her, like a schoolgirl crush. She spends hours talking about him. The fact that she’s never even met him doesn’t seem to matter at all.’

Another of her amorous obsessions was actor Kevin Costner. After she plagued him with raunchy phone calls, he reputedly told friends, ‘She’s a woman crying out for love.’

Then there was golfer Tiger Woods, whom she flew 1,500 miles flight to meet, then confided to broadcaster Piers Morgan: ‘I’m in love.’ ‘Who’s the lucky guy?’ Morgan asked. ‘He doesn’t know yet,’ the Duchess replied. ‘It’s Tiger Woods! He’s so gorgeous. Do you think I stand a chance with him?’

When Morgan suggested Woods might not have much room in his schedule for dating royals, Fergie roared again: ‘Well. I am going to follow him around the course for a bit and see how I get on.’ Morgan concluded, ‘Poor old Tiger isn’t going to know what’s hit him.’

Her other fancies included George Clooney. When asked in an interview if she would go out with him, she replied: ‘Are pork chops greasy?’

[From The Daily Mail]

I didn’t know that Fergie had these celebrity crushes and I agree with Costner’s assessment, that she was crying out for love. I also think she’s a bottomless pit of need – nothing is ever enough, no one can ever give her the attention she really craves. The thing about John Jr. is really weird though. What else? I don’t know. I find it odd that the Mail published an excerpt which was so focused on Sarah’s terrible finances in the 1990s. It was also a reminder that the tabloids thought that Harry and Meghan were going to end up that way. That’s how they justify pocket-watching the Sussexes years later – because they believe that the Sussexes’ money will run out and King Charles will have to step in and provide some money, just as QEII did with Sarah and Andrew. It would never occur to them that the Sussexes have better money-management than the Yorks.

Photos courtesy of Avalon Red, Cover Images.