Russell Brand on his orgasm record: ‘Nine. It wasn’t a day. It was an evening’

Russell Brand

First off, I must admit to feeling utterly delighted that you bitches gave Russell Brand some serious love on last week’s discussion of successful marriage, and please keep feeling the Rusty awesomeness if you want him to continue being featured in this very venue. For awhile, I had lost faith, which is why I didn’t cover Rusty’s admission on “Conan” that he wanted to bone Jennifer Lawrence (and he said so in the most hilarious manner.) Since I am feeling so generous and candid, I suppose this is a great time to admit that I am a huge Russell Brand fangirl, yet I would never dream of sleeping with him because — let’s face it — dude has been with hundreds of women in his lifetime. However, I would indulge in some suggestive phone conversation with him at his leisure about any topic of his choosing.

Call me, Rusty.

Moving right along. Mister Brand has been making the talkshow rounds, and the above photograph shows him outside the Ed Sullivan theater for an appearance on “Late Night with David Letterman.” Accordingly, I’ve included a Letterman video clip at the bottom of this post, but you might be wondering what Rusty is promoting at the moment. It’s certainly not “Brand X,” which (sadly) has been cancelled by FX (after three seasons) although the network has moved forward with Brand on a “scripted, live action comedy that’s loosely based upon the comedian’s life.” Certainly, anyone that has read Rusty’s Booky Wook (or its sequel) will know that Russell’s personal life is a depthless mine just waiting to be plundered (ha). For the moment though, we’ll have to make do with Russell’s interview with HuffPo, during which he insists that his cumulative daily orgasm total is … nine. Whoa. Also, the scarves have duly returned:

Russell Brand

HuffPo

What’s the most number of orgasms Russell Brand has ever had? That’s the pressing question at least one fan of the 38-year-old comedian wanted to know the answer to, judging from this wildly unhinged interview on “HuffPost Live” with host Josh Zepps Tuesday morning.

When asked by a fan — from her bed, no less — what topped his list in sexual climaxes, Brand answered with the number nine. “Once in Dublin. Nine. It wasn’t even a day. It was an evening. It was crazy there. What a mental night it was. I felt exhausted the next day. No I wasn’t on drugs. After I’ve came off drugs, I had a lot of energy that needed to go somewhere, and I thought … [motions to waist] that way,” he said.

He added: “But you’ve got to make sure everyone is happy. I think that that person you’re having sex with must have an orgasm first, or you’re not fulfilling your duty as a man.”

[From HuffPo]

HA. Russell is so candid and so completely without shame as to his past behavior, and it’s very hard to fault him when he’s being completely honest, and any woman that gets with him must surely know the parameters. Seriously though … nine? He’s obviously telling the truth, but it’s still hard to imagine without contemplating a slow dry heave. Dry. Heave. Sorry.

Here is the aforementioned video from Russell’s brief visit with David Letterman a few nights ago. Rusty opened up to Dave about his three-week stint as a postman in London, and he discusses how he was seduced by the “potent cultural myth” that “as a mailman, sex will be everywhere for me.” Rusty continued, “It wasn’t true. It was a series of doors being closed in my face.” Russell admits that his theory resulted in a “zero-percent success rate.” Awww.

Russell Brand

Russell Brand

Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet

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66 Responses to “Russell Brand on his orgasm record: ‘Nine. It wasn’t a day. It was an evening’”

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  1. Anna says:

    I really love his final comment, about ‘duty as a man.’ This is the kind of patriarchy I can get behind.

    As for the 9-time finish…I buy it. No personal experience (sounds exhausting), but a couple of friends were lucky(?) enough.

    • Mei says:

      Such a hot little rule of his!

    • TheOriginalKitten says:

      Totally sexy rule.

      • The Original Tiffany says:

        Absolutely! Thank God that Mr. OT is a firm believer in that same rule. 😉

        All men should adopt this rule.

    • ya says:

      Wow – your friends seriously experienced something like that? Pretty amazing – I’ve thought that many was impossible!

      • Anna says:

        Well, one friend in particular married that guy 🙂 but this was when they just started dating and could only see each other on weekends. The other one is a guy friend who needed to set a personal record or something, after turning 30 (mild eyeroll/chuckle). But as I said…seems like so much work!

    • Ginger says:

      It can happen. I can recall one past relationship where the tally was 7 in one night. But I and the guy in question were in our twenties. You are correct…exhausting. But a good tired.

    • Violet says:

      Ha ha, that made me laugh too.

      Speaking from personal experience, guys in their teens and 20s are totally capable of it — but the most times I’ve ever had sex is eight times in one night, because more was just too exhausting. Good times 😉

  2. T.fanty says:

    You know, while I am slowly overcoming my aversion to Brand, and perhaps even warming to him, the idea of him having multiple orgasms *really* isn’t helping the process.

    • Leah says:

      @T.Fanty. With all due respect you are crazy ! You are swooning over that fakebaked emo mommy´s boy TommyAnne and you have problems with Rusty? Just kidding, each to their own.

      • T.fanty says:

        Yes. I own my taste! Also, coming from Essex myself, that high-pitched Minnie Mouse Essex boy voice (see also: David Beckham) really puts me off.

      • TheOriginalKitten says:

        Ha ha..Come on, T. Fanty..Beckham’s voice is way worse!!

      • lady mary. says:

        i like brand ,his book Booky Woooky is actually good,its hilarious ,sad ,insightful ,felt real,but it had the most strangest sentences like”my willy just burped”!!

      • Ginger says:

        Oh my! That is Beckham’s Achilles heel…the first time I heard him speak I thought well there’s the chink in the otherwise perfect seeming armor!

  3. mkyarwood says:

    Was he puffing smoke by the end? Seriously, Russell, you’re the anti tantra.

  4. Thora says:

    It’s easier to admit to past bad behavior than it is to admit to current bad behavior.

  5. Birdie says:

    Jesus.. 9 times. Well, he is truly an open book.

  6. smee says:

    Yoga and good diet – RB will be having sex until he’s a very old man if he keeps both of those things going.

    He’s fantastic – funny, smart, thoughtful and good looking.

    He may be a man-ho, but lets face it, many men (and women) might “go for it” too if they had the fame that could get them unlimited sex.

    • Thora says:

      I don’t know about that. Even if my options were multiplied ten fold I’d still find myself attracted to someone unobtainable. I think it’s human nature.

    • Leah says:

      At least he is unapologetic about his ways. Thats refreshing. I think he is very funny and kind of sweet and thats why he is sexy.

  7. Leigh_S says:

    OMG … I find him more hilarious and charming all the time. Clever and witty is always sexy to me. (all thanks to the CB team)

  8. Sue says:

    Hey Rusty – TMI!

  9. Thora says:

    Sunglasses at night?

  10. VioletCrumble says:

    Oh, the abrasion….Poor woman. Or maybe there was more than one….

    Really, Russell? I like you very much, but trackies and slippers? To go out!

    • Micki says:

      See it this way: if she had 9 orgasms too(his rule)that’s one powerfull anaesthetic for the abrasion.

      • MorticiansDoItDeader says:

        I think he’s talking about self pleasure. I didn’t watch the clip, but the article says nothing about there being a partner.

    • Ella says:

      Without a doubt, he is talking about multiple women. Not self-pleasure, and not one woman. I know Rusty’s MO. In fact, I think I’ve heard about this night in Dublin before – he may have mentioned it on his radio show years ago. It was pretty standard behavior for him in those days to be with up to 5 women at one time.

  11. annaloo. says:

    I love that he’s holding his own umbrella.

    I love that there’s a strange man under the umbrella with him who is not holding it.

  12. Aud says:

    He can say whatever he likes, have as many orgasms he wants, but I wouldn’t touch him with a ten foot pole.

  13. Emily C. says:

    He’s obviously telling the truth, but it’s still hard to imagine without contemplating a slow dry heave. Dry. Heave. Sorry.

    Huh? What’s your damage?

    It’s really not that unusual even for a man, especially if he’s young and healthy.

  14. Joanna says:

    good for him, making sure the woman is taken care of. he’s so not my type, but with the woman first attitude, i would totally hit it

  15. LadyJane says:

    All I can say is, when you are counting, you are losing.

  16. Nev says:

    His books are amazing and so well written. Love his style!

  17. Amy Tennant says:

    I heart Rusty. He cracks me up in every interview. His stand-up is hilarious too. I loved the interview with Ellen when he was with the two little girls.

  18. Maria says:

    in our circle of friends we were talking about this recently and most guys said even in their horniest teenage phase after discovering masturbation they couldnt do it more than five times because it started to hurt and got drier and drier.

    • Cricket says:

      I love Rusty too! He is so quick with wit and so smart I think he intimidates most interviewers. He is great on Ellen and agree the spot with the little girls from Essex is adorable! He is also great on Howard Stern.

      And where is the love for not dishing secrets on Katy as well as pulling a Guy Ritchie and taking $$$ from her!

      I personally think that as she gets older she will come to regret losing Rusty and he will be the one who got away (no pun intended..well maybe a smidge)

      • littlestar says:

        Agreed! Especially since she seems to be wasting more of her youth on the dirty douche bag John Mayer. How anyone can go from someone like Russell Brand to someone like John Mayer is beyond my comprehension.

  19. magpie says:

    I had a friend that worked with him and even though he hit on her repeatedly, she said it was more funny than obnoxious. She said he’s really one of the funniest people she’s ever met and he’s very nice and polite to everyone.

  20. Feebee says:

    This guy’s funny/smart/open book combo is working for me. In a arm’s distance kind of way.

    His x9 has me thinking though. Was it a group date because bloody hell, that’s a lot for one to handle….. you know…. in an evening. Or am I wrong 🙂

    Edit: @Violetcrumble, sorry just saw your post, ha, we think alike.

  21. Lee says:

    I love these Rusty posts – I always follow the talk show links for a laugh. Funny, quick and bright. I just don’t take the sex talk seriously – it’s his “thing”, it’s played for a laugh, and I don’t find it gross (not sexy either, but that’s partly why it’s so funny). He can get away with a heck of a lot more than probably anyone else could, and he’s charming while doing it.

  22. Kim1 says:

    Speaking of postman,I believe my mailman is having an affair with my neighbor.I have seen him exiting her home twice.This last time he left through garage.Isn’t it against policy for a mail carrier to go inside a house.He was carrying a bottle of water the first time I saw him. I’M in Houston where the temperature is close to 100 degrees so maybe it was innocent.

  23. Dizzybenny says:

    years ago I saw a stand up bit by Gary Shandling about multiple orgasm.
    He said that man like women could achieve multiple orgasm.”they have an orgasm in bed and then another one next day at work when they tell there friends.”
    so I figure Rusty made 8 phone calls that night 😉

  24. Holden says:

    He’s got me by three and afterward we were both in the shop for a few days.

  25. littlestar says:

    I’m adding his books to my summer reading list! I plan on going to the book store this Saturday to buy Brandi Glanville’s book for my best friend for his birthday, so hopefully I’ll be able to find Russell’s books there as well.

    Honestly, if I wasn’t a taken woman and was single and had the opportunity, I’d hit it. He can talk the talk, so I’d be curious to see if he could walk the walk LOL! 😀

  26. Mandy says:

    I could listen to him talk for HOURS. He is so very charming!

  27. Ginger says:

    I’m reading Booky Wook right now as a result of the Russell love on this site. I really love it so I’m sure to also read the sequel. He is so smart and charming! I now understand the allure. And his statement about the lady finishing first…well, that just proves his intelligence!

    • Andrea says:

      I’m reading it also and being an only child I can relate to A LOT about what he says about being the odd one out, never fitting in not even as an adult and at 32, I can totally relate.

  28. Ella says:

    Since so many of you seem pro-Rusty, I hope some of you will take the time to watch his full HuffPost interview, which is here: http://live.huffingtonpost.com/r/segment/russell-brand-messiah-complex/51b5e78902a760779200060a

    Really, that “orgasm” question was at the very end and was a tiny part of the whole interview. It’s just the only thing the press picked up on because it’s got salacious appeal. The bulk of the interview is extremely thoughtful and interesting (as well as funny). He and the host, Josh, have a great rapport as well. It’s well worth watching.

    • Lee says:

      Thanks for that link! It’s a great interview.

    • Shannon1972 says:

      I loved that!! Thanks so much for sharing. He is my major celebrity crush, and I would love to be a gazelle in his path. 😉

      • Ella says:

        You’re welcome, glad you guys liked it! My favorite part is when he goes on that long, eloquent speech and then finally stops and there’s just dead silence … well played by the host there!

        Sometimes Russell gets on such a roll with his philosophizing and he’s so passionate he makes me feel like I’m listening to a sermon, but in a good way (I’m not religious). He is jaw-droppingly articulate & charismatic.

  29. krat says:

    My forever dong, in the terms of this site. He’s absolutely my kind of human being, all that wit and shimmying hips and just lovely. Total rockstar, 10/10.

  30. kelly says:

    No big deal. I’ve have 15 big O’s in one day (with one guy). Amazing!

  31. taxi says:

    Sorry – tmi from a guy who looks & sounds like a serial killer.

  32. moo says:

    with himself, I’m sure.

    he disgusts me!

  33. lovegossip says:

    For a guy, that’s not a problem is it? Meaning, I am sure he didn’t have to struggle to achieve that. Lol

    • Ella says:

      I don’t know…wouldn’t most guys have trouble doing it that many times in one night? I don’t think it’s common. A lot of guys just don’t have the energy/stamina for that, especially after age 30 or so. Their sexual peak is in their 20s. Physiologically, it’s more common for women to have multiple O’s in a short period of time than it is for men to do the same. I think RB is a bit of a freak of nature in terms of his sex drive. ;P

  34. guilty pleasures says:

    Is he not a self-avowed sexaholic?
    I have found him to the sexiest beast for a very long time. He is smart, funny as Hell, loves his mom, works hard at his sobriety, does yoga, writes with a literary skill and thoughtfulness that is rare…what’s not to love?
    I must say, though, that he is the ONLY man I’ve seen who can do skinny jeans and a scarf without making me laugh!

    • Ella says:

      He once spent a few months in a ‘sex addiction center’, before he was famous. He was forced into it by his management.

      He now claims he’s not a sex addict but just really, really likes sex. His take on addiction is that it doesn’t matter what the subject is — it’s just any behavior that’s compulsive and interfering with someone’s life. He has strong addictive tendencies in general, so personally I think he IS a bit of a sex addict and uses it as a way to cope with not doing drugs or drinking. But hey, at least it’s harmless, as long as everyone’s a consenting adult. And he seems to have it more under control these days than he did when he first got famous.

  35. Beatriz says:

    Ha. His postman story reminded me of Bukowski’s time as a postman. I really need to read that book again :D.

  36. Andrea says:

    I have had sex 4 times with an ex bf in one night, dunno how many orgasms I had, but I remember I had to ice my nether regions down afterwards. Too bad that ex became an alcoholic and then he never got it up! I have small orgasms so I orgasm frequently, so I typically have 8-12 O’s per session; I’ve had 20 at times, but those were long sex sessions. Most women don’t believe me because I learned in a psychology of sexual behavior class that most women have only one big orgasm and only 20% of women are like me with the small frequent ones. I bet me and Russell would have a lot of fun together. 😉 Plus, he is super intelligent, which is a huge turn-on. he could screw me with his mind before he literally screws me! 🙂

  37. miasys says:

    To each their own, I guess. He skeeves me out. Give me Fassy or RDJ.