This feels like one of those stories where we have to break out our ten-year calendars and our calculators to make sense of. According to the NY Post, Linda Evangelista has a four-year-old son. That alone surprised me – I remembered her being pregnant, vaguely, a few years ago, but was it really four-to-five years ago? And she had a boy? And she never revealed the paternity? So now that we’re all on the same page: Linda has a four-year-old son, and she’s never told anybody who his father is. Now the NY Post says that the dad is Francois Henri Pinault, best known as Salma Hayek’s baby-daddy/husband. SCANDAL?!? Eh. The way the baby daddy drama is described, it sounds like Pinault fathered Linda’s baby when he and Salma were split up (another event I have no memory of).

It’s a baby mystery no more. The father of supermodel Linda Evangelista’s 4-year-old boy is none other than billionaire Frenchman Francois-Henri Pinault — who just happens to be the husband of actress Salma Hayek, The Post has learned.

Despite Evangelista’s rep denying Pinault’s paternity when confronted with it by The Post’s Page Six back in October 2007, the Victoria’s Secret stunner came to court yesterday in hopes of hashing out a support agreement with Pinault, the father of the boy, Augustin James.

The Manhattan magistrate’s court action confirms that the two-timing Pinault — CEO of the $28 billion conglomerate that owns Gucci, Bottega Veneta and Yves St. Laurent — is the daddy to two 4-year-olds by different world-famous beauties.

One is Valentina, acknowledged and cared for by her parents, Pinault and Hayek, who jet between France, New York and LA. The other is Evangelista’s boy, unacknowledged by both the mogul and his actress wife, who has repeatedly insisted in interviews that Pinault has only three children — Valentina and two from his previous marriage to his first wife.

Evangelista, 46, herself has zealously guarded the love child’s paternity, even lying to protect Pinault. A year after “Augie’s” birth, she was claiming in interviews that the father was “a New York architect.”

He rep at DNA Model Management, Didier Fernandez, called the Pinault paternity rumor “untrue” when confronted with it by Page Six in 2007.

Yesterday was the model’s third or fourth trip to Family Court, and no agreement was reached, making a fall support trial looking likely, according to a court source.

Evangelista left glumly without commenting to a reporter. Pinault, 49, was a no-show, but that was due to a misunderstanding, said his lawyer, David Aronson.

“We had understood that it was to be a brief, telephone conference, to bring Magistrate Troy up to date on what the status was,” Aronson told The Post when asked about the court date yesterday.

Evangelista’s lawyer, William Beslow, had no comment Evangelista and Pinault conceived their boy in early 2006, when Pinault was reportedly separated from then-gal pal Hayek, whom he wed in 2009.

[From The New York Post]

So not only is Pinault the father but he’s also a deadbeat dad? For God’s sake, he’s a BILLIONAIRE. And if Linda’s son was truly conceived during a lull in Pinault and Hayek’s relationship, why not simply own up to it? Unless the boy was conceived while Salma and Francois were actually together (more likely) and Francois has been lying to Salma all of this time (most likely)? Ugh.

It also sounds like Linda has really tried to keep all of this private too. She’s so odd, but in retrospect, I’m happy that she was able to carry a baby to term. I remember that she had a very difficult miscarriage years ago, when she was with some other dude.

Photos courtesy of WENN.