Kanye West has complicated feelings about his use of the word “bitch”

I like a good feminist analysis in general, and I’ve been known to spend an hour here or there reading the latest feminist treatise. But sometimes… it’s hard to explain without feeling like I’m selling out my gender. Like, I’m Team Ladies and I fight for and donate money to causes that I think will support women and women’s issues. But I think there’s a sliding scale of importance when it comes to “women’s issues” and given my limited time and resources, I tend to focus on what I consider the most urgent and pressing issues of the feminist cause: women’s reproductive rights, violence against women, gross inequalities and the like. When it comes to a feminist analysis of certain words, a semantic debate about what is or is not acceptable to say… I tend to lose interest. After all, I write for a site with “bitch” right there in the name. And I’ve always worn the “bitch” label with pride, even if I was called a “bitch” in a negative way. I AM a bitch. I own that sh-t, good and bad.

Why discuss this subject now? Because Kanye West brought it up. Kanye uses “bitch” in his lyrics often enough, and he recently wrote and recorded a song called “Perfect Bitch” – for his girlfriend Kim Kardashian. But Kanye took to Twitter a few days ago to question himself and his followers about his use of the word, and whether he was (my words) a misogynist for using the word. You can read all of Kanye’s free-style tweets here, and here’s basically what he said:

Kanye West declared that Kim Kardashian was his “Perfect Bitch” when he confirmed that a new track he previewed at a New York club was written about his reality TV star girlfriend — but he may be having second thoughts about the pet name. Though Kim was reportedly “honored” to be Kanye’s “Perfect Bitch,” the 35-year-old rapper is now wondering if it really is an acceptable word to use to describe a woman — even if it is meant in a positive way.

The rapper, who was most recently featured in 2 Chainz’s (arguably misogynistic) video for “Birthday Song,” ruminated on the use of the word while in France on Sept. 2.

In a series of tweets he wrote:

“I usually never tweet questions but I struggle with this so here goes… Is the word BITCH acceptable? To be more specific, is it acceptable for a man to call a woman a bitch even if it’s endearing? Has hip hop conditioned us to accept this word?” he wrote, before comparing the word bitch to an equally contentious word.

“Do we love this word as much as we love the word NI**A in an endearing way? correction, Here’s the age old question, would we refer to our mothers as bitches? Would’ we call our fathers n-ggers or better yet NI**AS? If ni**a is such a positive word, why do we feel so uncomfortable for white people to say it, even with a hall pass? Is it ok to use bitch as long as we put BAD in front of it? Like you a BAD BITCH. Perhaps the words BITCH and NI**A are now neither positive or negative. They are just potent and it depends on how [they] are used and by whom? #FREETHOUGHT.”

The rapper makes a good point — not that any of this hasn’t been said before, but he continued on to further ponder the use of the word.

“What if there was no profanity… What if we decided to legalise profanity in a sense? In France they play songs with cursing on the radio. I was recently questioned about the use of the word BITCH in my music and initially was offended by anyone questioning anything in my music,” he wrote, explaining the inspiration behind his sudden introspection.

“Stevie Wonder never had to use the word bitch to get his point across,” he conceded, adding, “I will admit that I sometimes go back an omit cursing from my records. I like to use profanity as a tool and not a crutch. I’m not tweeting to say what we need and what we don’t… I just wanted to think out loud with you guys today… #THEWORDBITCH.”

[From HuffPo]

I think Kanye really was having this debate with himself – this wasn’t some statement issued because of a controversy, Kanye was just sitting there in his Paris hotel or wherever, thinking about feminism and lyricism and the power we give to some words. And you know what? I don’t hate his analysis. Some people hate the word bitch in any context, some people don’t care about appointing themselves the Word Police, and some people think it just depends on the context. I truly wouldn’t be offended if Kanye called me a BAD BITCH. You know he would too.

Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet and WENN.

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104 Responses to “Kanye West has complicated feelings about his use of the word “bitch””

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  1. marie says:

    agreed Kaiser, I am a bitch and I own it..

    • BB says:

      Kanye’s best buddy Jay Z using the word “Bitch” in his music. The word is used everywhere. Women use the word as a term of endearment when referring to their girlfriends or best friend. I don’t use the word and don’t see a problem with it.

  2. paola says:

    The right use of that word is:
    My bitch Kim and I are going on a long journey and we’ll never be back.

  3. Shitler says:

    I think the word has negative cannotations. Personally if anyone called me that, they’ll b on their way to the emergency ward

    • megs283 says:

      Yeah. I just can’t get behind it, period. We have other words in the English language to connote fierce respectability – even badass is ok. But bitch is inherently derogatory, IMO.

    • Dara says:

      So……threatening violence is okay but using the word bitch isn’t? I’m pushing my luck here it seems but what you just said skips right over the word bitch and heads straight to c*** territory.

  4. atlantapug says:

    I’m ok with bitch in certain circumstances. I’m not really ok with ni**a in any circumstance.

    Gayfish is on another one of his pseudo-intellectual rants with himself, as usual.

  5. Janet says:

    A woman who lets a man call her a bitch as a term of endearment is a woman with no self-respect.

    • Sam says:

      Agree. But Kim’s willing to get pissed on for a slice of fame, so a song about her? I’m sure she’s down with ANY derogatory language.

      • yolo says:

        THIS and btw, his next rap out highlights the facts that she was a “star in home movies”…wth… Please explain how Kanye rapping about his gf being in a homemade sex movie with another guy, is even rap worthy..?? These two confuse me. I see this relationship ending in a bad way.

  6. mln76 says:

    B.I.T.C.H.=
    Babe In Total Control Honey 😉

  7. MoxyLady007 says:

    I cannot get behind using it. Just hearing it makes me angry. There is no male equivalent and the word is used to put women in their place. Always has been. I hate it. Owning it isn’t an option for me. Almost all of the women I know who claim to be bitches and to be proud of it are just mean. Really mean. That’s not empowering. That doesn’t bring women closer together.
    Words have power and the word bitch is super charged. I want nothing to do with it.

    • HappyMom says:

      +1

    • Amanda Hugginkiss says:

      ++

    • Jay says:

      As a kid I always felt the male equivalent was bastard or asshole, depending on context.

      • Ziggy459 says:

        The word ‘bastard’ is actually a backhanded insult to a female…

      • blondie10101 says:

        Bastard actually means illegitimate child. In times gone by, if you were illegitimate it was automatically assumed it was because your mother was a whore. Even if she was raped. Bastards didn’t get inheritances, titles, property or any of the prestige they might have gotten if their parents had been married either.

      • Jay says:

        And the word bitch used to mean female dog. Bastard evolved too. “You don’t have to be such a bastard about it,” is a phrase I’ve heard people use which is devoid of the original meaning of the word and bears no implicit offence against women. In that context, it would suggest a vindictive or insensitive male, and so sounds roughly equivalent to what some mean bitch to mean for women.

      • Jay says:

        And the word b*tch used to mean female dog. B*stard evolved too. “You don’t have to be such a b*stard about it,” is a phrase I’ve heard people use which is devoid of the original meaning of the word and bears no implicit offence against women. In that context, it would suggest a vindictive or insensitive male, and so sounds roughly equivalent to what some mean b*tch to mean for women. (Had to censor as it wasn’t letting me post.)

    • Girlattorney says:

      I agree 100%. The ladies I know who wear that label proudly tend not to be folks with whom I enjoy spending time.

    • jaye says:

      Sure there is…I can think of a few…”M***erf***er”, “Pr*ck”, sh*theel”, “a**hole”…

    • ShugAveryPee says:

      And as we say in the baptist church after a great sermon ” The doors of the church are now open” … This comment is EVERYTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  8. Johanna says:

    He’s so desperate for Jay z’s constant approval & I think this has everything to do with Jay z’s vow to stop using this word.

    It was ok for them to refer to others daughters as bitches but lets retire the word now that HE has a daughter.

    • menlisa says:

      Jay never said he would stop using the word bitch because he has a daughter now. That letter was a fake written by a fan..
      But you are correct concerning how Kanye is always seeking Jay’s approval. It’s quite sad…

      • Johanna says:

        I don’t know what letter you’re referring to but he said this in his poem for Blue. It was covered here on Celebitchy.

        He’s a moron who will have to live with the fact that at one point or another someone will refer to his daughter as a bitch. A trend he worked so hard on building.

      • Kim says:

        Jay never said he would stop using bitch.CB reported it but it was a fan not him

    • Johanna says:

      Good to know. Almost makes him sound less of an a**… Almost.

  9. NerdMomma says:

    Extending his analogy…I think bitch is a word acceptable only for women to say. Men do not have access to that word and it’s offensive when they use it.

    Since I’m all about equality and equal opportunity for men and women, let me just say that his outfit in these pictures is horrendous. What is he thinking with that shirt and those pants and that ridiculous chain around his neck?!

    • TheOriginalKitten says:

      What about when gay men say it?

      • ronnie says:

        Anything gay men say is inheritly trending and acceptable. They are just that cool.

      • Andy says:

        Huh?

        A man is a man. Sexuality doesn’t change that.

      • TheOriginalKitten says:

        @ Andy-I just brought it up because many posters justified usage of the term “bitch” if it was a gay man saying it, like “fabulous bitch”.

        Incidentally, I didn’t mean it as a challenge to Nerdmomma-I was just genuinely curious if she made that distinction. For the record, I generally have issues with men using the term, but again, it would depend on the context and who was saying it.

      • flan says:

        @Andy. Gay men also have a history of being discriminated against, making it more acceptable for them to use it.

  10. DanaG says:

    I’m a bitch and I know a lot of women who are and proud of it. I have no doubts that Kim is very much a bitch.

  11. Skins says:

    Having 2nd thoughts like his buddy Jay-Z? What else do these guys have to say, really?

  12. Katyusha says:

    He is the worst dresser. Wasn’t Mardi Gras in February? Where did he get those beads?

  13. Fudge you, I'm going to Guam! says:

    Ugh….I must confess, I don’t like the B word even though I have used it in the past, even on here and I felt bad afterwards (used it in a joking way though).
    I don’t like curse words in general which is why I’ve now changed my name which you might find silly.
    It’s not ME.
    I don’t curse and when I do I look silly.
    I don’t like the B word and I definitely don’t like the N word.
    I really really hate hiphop/rap music because most of it is misogynist sexist (c)rap.
    I find nothing empowering about the word.
    I don’t want to “Own it”, I want nothing to do with it!
    I’m not a “bad b*tch” nor do I want to be.
    Kanye West will continue using both words, thank god I have the choice not to support him with my money.

  14. Evadstructn says:

    Ballbreaker Intent on Totally Castrating and Humiliating. Valerie Solanis, anyone?

  15. Really? says:

    Hmmm, this is interesting…i’ve always wondered whether it was cool or not to use the N word as a term of endearment (there is a difference when it’s said with love or fear). Now, i think that it’s definitely only OK for a black person to say it, even if they say it to one of their white friends…i say this because, in comparison, i would not like a man to refer to me as a bitch, even if he meant it to be a compliment, like “perfect or sexy,” though i might let it slide if the pronunciation was noticeably changed, as in “biyotch…”

    Another funny observation, if my gay boyfriend calls me bitch, i’m not at all bothered, but i would never call him a fag (like the N word, i think that’s reserved for the gays), but i do call him a bitch, too! Anyway, i’ve never called anyone a fag, nor used the N word nor called any of my girlfriends the B word, but i do see that the teenage girls are calling each other bitches all the time and that maybe one of these days all of this stuff will just clear up on its own. Or not. I hope Kanye reads CeleBitchy, he’ll get some good answers here!

    • littlemissnaughty says:

      Yeah, I have mixed feelings about this as well and in my head I was going back and forth about this like you are in your post.

      It depends on whether or not a person (man or woman, gay or straight) is okay with being called a bitch. It also depends on who’s calling them (me) bitch. A man I don’t know or only know in passing? Hell NO! My sister? Sure.
      As a general rule it’s probably wise to not use the word unless you know exactly how a person feels about it, meaning you know them very well. I completely understand women who think the word is never okay under any circumstances and I would never try to convince them otherwise or brush it off. It’s all about connotation and personal opinion with words like this (although I would also never use the word “fag”, EVER) and we should respect people’s boundaries.

      If someone wants to own their bitchiness on the other hand, by all means. As a linguist I’m fascinated by this aspect of feminism (and the struggle of minorities and their treatment through language in general) and it is actually a much more important topic than many of us realize. Language is our most basic tool in everyday life and can shape our thoughts and opinions (according to some theories) and we shouldn’t discount its impact on society.

  16. Audrey says:

    I think if you don’t feel right calling your mother a bitch or your father a n**a, than, no, don’t call other people those things.

  17. Erinn says:

    I find it funny how many people hate the word bitch, but are frequenting a site called celeBITCHy. Is it okay to embrace ‘bitchy’ but not bitch all of a sudden?

    If I’m joking around I’ll use the word as an endearment. I think it really depends on the context. If someone’s pissed off and calling people bitches, it’s going to come off as derogatory, and mean. Some people can use it without thinking twice, some can’t. If you don’t like it, don’t let people call you one, and don’t call people one.

    • megs283 says:

      As someone who isn’t okay with the term, but checks out this site daily, I feel compelled to respond: I love this site despite the name. Yes, some of the articles can be bitchy (but not all!), and I enjoy most of it, but I’m not going to claim that’s a good thing and wear the term as a badge of honor. Or call other people bitches or say that it’s okay for someone to call me one.

      • Fudge you, I'm going to Guam! says:

        I agree with megs.
        I even defend Kristen Stewart from the slut shaming and the B word calling, that’s not to say I like her because I don’t, but I don’t agree with the sexist name calling.

      • TheOriginalKitten says:

        Who’s bringing up K-Stew in every post?

      • Fudge you, I'm going to Guam! says:

        Touché 😉

    • anniecc says:

      Well, yeah… bitchy is just an adjective, but bitch is a label. The two are totally different IMO. I wouldn’t care if someone accused me of being bitchy but I would be pretty offended if they called me a bitch.

  18. TheOriginalKitten says:

    Words should NEVER be banned. Censorship is not a solution and we mustn’t lose focus on the importance of free speech and open dialogue..

    Whether the word “bitch” is insulting should be interpreted on a case by case basis. Personally, if I hear someone with a history of mysoginistic behavior using the term, then yeah, it’s going to offend me. I think WHO is using the word “bitch” and the context in which it is used is what really matters.

    • Audrey says:

      I don’t think words should be banned either. Actually, I tried to type the whole N***a word in my previous post, but it wouldn’t get past moderation.

      So, don’t ban words, but understand that they do have meaning and deal with those consequences. I, honestly, don’t want to call women I like “b*****s” or men that I like “n****a”.

      • TheOriginalKitten says:

        Oh I completely agree. That’s part of the responsibility-understanding the implications of our words.

    • I Choose Me says:

      That’s my feeling too Kitten. It’s all about the context. Who says it, how they say it and why.

  19. mandyfan says:

    Just so you guys know, Kanye was probably talking about Lupe Fiasco’s recent song “Bitch Bad,” which A) is AMAZING and thoughtful and relevant and B) brings up the same issues that Kanye is discussing.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C3m3t_PxiUI

  20. ramona says:

    It’s difficult – in the scheme of things, I’d much rather someone called me “bitch” than called me “stupid” or “incompetent”. It’s so overused that there’s no real sting left in the word.

    I find it pretty odd when people use a word themselves but are angered when others use it – as in, *I* can call myself a bitch but HE can’t, or *I* can call myself a n—a but that white girl can’t… either a word is offensive or a word is a word. Anything can be offensive if it hits your ear at the right angle.

    • KellyinSeattle says:

      Anything but the C word. Sorry I made you think it. Anyway, it’s not like he’s thinking in deep, philosophical terms…..proper grammar has gone to hell, anyway (I’m a teacher). I saw Kanye on something and he was talking about how someone was triflin’…any votes to knock that word out of use? Any takers?

  21. Dee Cee says:

    I must be somehow wrong..? Yet, it’s right to do what I feel. I know that’s impossible, because I and other stars are speaking out and are saying that we know it might be okay.. otherwise we have to tone it down and show and have more respect in our words, not use some words that harm and hurt.. and that isn’t creative ya’ll..

  22. mytbean says:

    As with everything it’s relative. Some people will hear it and associate it with empowerment. Others will think of degradation. And then some will think about Naomi Campbell.

    I think it all depends on the describer/describee. I take it all in context really.

  23. irishserra says:

    If we justify the use of bitch, then we have to justify the use of ALL the other un-PC words. I’m okay with it, but we all know that people will hang onto those other taboos as long as they can and so free speech will never really be attainable.

    So for now, call me a bitch and deal with the consequences.

  24. hollyjo says:

    Thanks for sharing the Lupe Fiasco song, mandyfan. I bet you’re spot on! I know if I rapped about “bitches” all the time and then watched that video I would feel like a fool.

  25. Cathy says:

    I wouldn’t call anybody anything that I wouldn’t want to be called. I can be bitchy at times (especially if I don’t feel good) but I am not a bitch normally and wouldn’t call anybody one, because I wouldn’t like to be called one.

  26. Shelly says:

    Kanye is so annoying. I still can’t believe that Kim threw away her entire wardrobe for him and let him re-style her. She really has NO personal identity. I will say her hair looks better lately.

  27. Lynne says:

    I think Kanye was using twitter to discuss the word Bitch because Cruel Summer is going to drop this month, nothing more.

  28. B says:

    I’ve never heard a man say the word “bitch” in a positive way. If my bf tried to use it endearingly, watch out lol. I’m glad Kanye’s mulling this over. I’d prefer to do away with gender specific insults, but I have called a**holes bitches before bc I know they find that the most demeaning insult, sadly.

    • jwoolman says:

      That’s my experience also, especially in overwhelmingly male school and work environments. In real life, I’ve never heard bitch used in anything but a put-down, dismissive, trivializing sort of way. No good feelings from it for me. Also always seems like an insult to female dogs somehow… The verb form also makes me uncomfortable since its origin is dismissive of women. Men discuss, women just bitch. That kind of thing.

  29. lizzi says:

    I’m still caught up on the “at first was offended about anyone questioning anything about my music” line.. dude seriously? is he f*cking for real??

  30. Izzy4ya says:

    The B word or the N word, there is nothing endearing about it. No matter how it’s used the N word is about insecurity and self loathing, and I never got any other impression despite all the pseudo intellectualizing. The word Bitch, especially in the context of rap music, is usually about OWNERSHIP. I’m not surprised though, that it was so easy for rappers to sell this BS. Kanye is so lame.

  31. thatgirl says:

    My concern with the use of the word comes from the fact that I work with young girls. It always concerns me when I hear them listening to music that has this language in it because I wonder if they understand the use in an ironic or positive way. Young girls who struggle with identity and self-confidence issues don’t need to be told that it’s acceptable for the boys they date to call them a bitch because so many of them struggle to identify and differentiate between abusive language (so often a warning sign for physical abuse to come) and the use of the word in a positive or playful manner.

    That being said, I understand Kanye’s point (although I agree that he was probably just doing this to get attention for his album) and I am not the “language police”. I have no problem with the word in general (or any other word) just the use of it in popular music and culture which is being viewed by young people as an example.

  32. Pat Dorty says:

    That’s cause he’s deep.

  33. ladybert62 says:

    I think the word has negative connotations – especially in rap music where it seems to be an especially derogatory word for women.

  34. palermo says:

    I think there’s only one bitch here Kanye, and it’s you …

    It sounds terrible for women to call themselves that or other women, sorry.

  35. danielle says:

    surprisingly thoughtful from Kanye.

  36. yolo says:

    Hum…interesting.. While, I DO own the fact that I am and can be, I don’t really care or get offended if I’m called a bitch..hence, the ownership. Calling me a bitch, usually gets a slow evil smile and a raised eyebrow, and I promptly get an apology. I do say to my bff/cousin ‘love you bitch’ but we’ve been saying that WAY before KK and Paris (which is unfortunate that those 2 clowns said the same things we did). I’ll take to B word over the C word any day. The “C” word BY FAR is much more offensive. I only say the N word when I listen to rap …lol… true story.

  37. Ludakristen says:

    (ignoring the feminist discussions going on)

    Kim looks thinner, no?

    • yolo says:

      Yes, rumor has it that Kayne has her on some crazy diet so she can fit into his clothing line. Weird. She’s such a puppet, it’s scary.

  38. Amy says:

    Some people use the word “bitch” as a term of endearment. My friends and I don’t call each other that. If someone calls me that, I take it as an insult. I never understood people who “reclaimed” the word or who are proud of being a bitch. In my experience, women who proudly label themselves as bitches are really mean in real life and aren’t well liked.

  39. skuddles says:

    Bitch doesn’t bother me in the slightest. On the occasions I’ve been called a bitch it’s generally because I’m being very direct or defending my position on something I feel strongly about – calling me a bitch is NOT going to make even the tiniest dent in my armor, that’s for damn certain. I also tend to see it as a sign of weakness in the other party… it usually means they’re feeling threatened or inferior. And that’s okay by me too. Boy do I sound like a bitch or what? LOL!

    By the way, how tall – or should I say how short – is Kanye?? Isn’t Kim like 5 ft nothing? And it looks like he’s only a few inches taller at best.

    • marie says:

      exactly skuddles, this is what I wanted to say this morning but was too dang tired to figure out how to phrase it, and you said it better than I would have anyway..

      • TheOriginalKitten says:

        You can call me a bitch Skuddles and you can too Marie.

        But I’d punch a dude if he called me that-that’s real.

      • skuddles says:

        Thanks Marie! I’ve been down the bitch block enough times in life I have it pretty sorted out in my thinking lol!

        And thanks OKitten… you sexy bitch you 😉

  40. MerryHappy says:

    Kanye is the Prince of Pompous Pontification

  41. FingerBinger says:

    To answer his own question all he has to ask himself is would he have called his deceased mother a bitch or wanted her to be referred in that way and then he’d have his answer.

  42. TG says:

    I call myself one and I could careless if someone called me a b*tch to my face. It wouldn’t bother me, what would bother me is that someone doesn’t like me for some reason and in my real life I try to be a decent human and not doing mean things to people. I mean I am not in she-man’s territory where I demand everybody like me, but I don’t think I do things to cause offense too often. I mean I am in my 30’s so I don’t really have crazy confrontations with anyone, except the random crazy neighbor who is on the hunt hoping I don’t pick up my dog’s poop so he can have something to yell about. But it hasn’t happened yet.

  43. Gal says:

    He should smile more often, he so much better looking than when he has his “I’m tough and too cool for you” face on.

  44. Chria says:

    Bitch is defined as a female dog, lewd woman, a malicious person, a person who serves demeaning tasks for another, or a homesexual relation between two prison inmates where the submissive one is considered the “bitch”. That’s comes from dictionary.com.

    Every woman has “bitch” moments and many men do too, but owning the word is just demeaning yourself. Regardless of your personal definition being classified as a bitch is a bad thing, so why own it? Then again I don’t understand why gas is 3.87 a gallon, more empty homes then homeless people, and two idiots are running for president.

    So yeah America the land of opport…I mean bitches.

  45. Kapowski says:

    In that first pic it looks like he has a Barbie arm. Haha

  46. faye says:

    Serious question: If he can call her a bitch and use it a a term of endearment can she call him a nigger and use it the same manner?

  47. la chica says:

    Deep thoughts from Kanye but all so derivative. Where would he be if Jay-Z wasn’t always leading the way?

    I am a bitch. I feel comfortable calling myself a bitch and meaning it in both its positive and negative connotations. But no MAN is allowed to refer to me by that label. Not once, not ever. Double standard? Deal with it.

  48. swack says:

    My take on this is that Kanye is backtracking because of all the negativity he has gotten because of it. I don’t believe for one second that any of this has bothered him except for the bad publicity.

  49. Ginger says:

    i don’t take too much issue with that word…I own it too…I’m a crazy bitch! (In a good way)

  50. ShugAveryPee says:

    I must be as old as dirt (and i am only 27) … But I am sooo confused when I hear some of you say that WOMEN use it all the time…. What women are you all hanging with… I NEVER and I repeat NEVER refer to my girlfriends in that way at all… It is not a nice word… at all.. And they know they better never call me that… There are so many kinder words to use than referring to people I say I love as a female dog…. And You do know what the neighborhood male dogs do to a female dog when she is in heat …. Think about that and let it settle .. then tell me if you want your man calling you that…We as society are getting a little too lax in a lot of things… Women deserve to be respected whether you feel they deserve it or not….
    Kanye I ask you this ” If your mother was still alive and she had a boyfriend and he referred to her as “His bitch” or “My bitch” … how would you feel? Now I am sure if that happen in a public place Kanye would loose his mind… So imagine the whole world hearing you refer to your lady of choice as a female dog !!!!!