Star: Jon Hamm’s horrible girlfriend ordered him to wear underwear at all times

We’ve known since 2010 that Jon Hamm is a well-endowed man, and that his endowment is sometimes allowed to swing freely. The Hamm Dong likes to go commando. The Hamm Dong needs to breathe. It was in 2010 that the Enquirer claimed (brilliantly!) that Jon Hamm’s lack of underwear – his preference – was causing costume problems on the set of Mad Men, and that the costume department was forcing him to wear underwear. Now Star Magazine claims his wet blanket of girlfriend is demanding the same thing – apparently, she hates it when the paparazzi get shots of The Hamm Dong bulging away without constraint.

The photos of Jon Hamm strolling commando near his LA home sent his female fans into a tizzy – but his longtime girlfriend, Jennifer Westfeldt, has ordered him to put on some underwear, pronto!

“Jennifer is furious with Jon for walking around, letting it all hang out,” tattles a pal. “Jon has always preferred being au natural, but after yet another round of pictures popped up, Jen freaked out.”

“Jennifer was already feeling insecure over Jon’s sex-symbol status, and the pictures were the last straw,” explains the source. “Jen is modest and shy – now all her friends are snickering about how lucky she is.”

So Jennifer has taken matters into her own hands [Editor’s note: I bet she needs BOTH HANDS], so to speak. “She’s bought him monogrammed boxers, Calvin Klein briefs, boxer briefs – you name it. She told him that whether he likes it or not, he’s wearing underwear!”

[From Star Magazine, print edition]

I get that at some point, it is somewhat gross. Maybe that’s just me – I only go commando occasionally, and I don’t even have any body parts down there that “swing”. But obviously The Hamm is so enormous that he finds traditional underwear somewhat uncomfortable, I think. In which case… why not go for comfort when you’re just chillin’ at home, or walking down the street or whatever. Damn, Jennifer! You’ve been getting it on the regular for more than a decade! Can’t we just look at it every now and then?

Photos courtesy of WENN, Fame/Flynet and Pacific Coast News.

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29 Responses to “Star: Jon Hamm’s horrible girlfriend ordered him to wear underwear at all times”

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  1. DailyNightly says:

    I don’t recall where I saw it but someone referred to it as the “hammaconda” which will now not leave my memory**giggle**

  2. Kaye says:

    “I bet she needs BOTH HANDS” – I almost spit my orange juice on the keyboard laughing.

  3. Launicaangelina says:

    Historically, I’ve tended to kind of defend her but no more!

    Jennifer, dear, you have thrown down the gauntlet and I’m ready for a fight! You have the Hammdong in real life; let us have him in pictures! *slips rings on fingers and smears Vaseline on face*

    • j.eyre says:

      And because I am in “a mood” I shall have your back on this – although I warn you, I am absolutely worthless in these battles.

      *Grabs a Vitamin Water, newsboy cap and tosses sassy scarf over shoulder*

      Let us be off!

  4. Sophia says:

    I might be the only one here but i think it’s gross, underwear is supposed to absorb sweat in our lower parts, even if you keep a good hygiene! my boyfriend hates going commando,he said that he couldn’t walk comfortably since his thing was getting in the way and the trousers fabric felt horrible.

  5. Talie says:

    There was a blind item about this on Gawker years ago, when Mad Men first picked up steam, about how he was freaking out the wardrobe dept because he never had anything on.

  6. Maritza says:

    Good for her, not wearing underwear is just plain nasty and there is no reason to walk around without them.

    • Raven says:

      Plus, on what he makes, he could have custom underwear made. Silk rubbing on his skin would feel much better than rough shorts fabric.

  7. SofiaR says:

    If he had worn those bath shorts without underwear in them I wonder if we would have seen the head of the infamous snake peek out?

  8. Jacq says:

    What a selfish bitch!

  9. KellyinSeattle says:

    My ex husband was very well endowed and he refused to wear underwear, and the police even came and had a “talk” with him because neighbors complained. I don’t hear many people complaining about the Hambulger.

    • Bonfire Beach says:

      I didn’t know there were literally “underwear police!” Imagine being that cop!

      On a serious note, they probably passed it off as a public decency thing. But still, underwear police! Where are the wardrobe police when people are out in pajamas at walmart?

    • MyCatLovesTV says:

      Seriously, the cops paid a visit because the neighbors complained about the size of your exhusband’s penis? If it is covered by something (pants, shorts, etc.) it isn’t illegal, is it? Do the bra cops come by when a lady is outside in just a tank top? This world is nuts! (Pardon the pun)

  10. Hautie says:

    Well if Mr. Hamm was would wear those tiny white Dolce panties… that David Gandy wears… then I am all for it!

    Just for reference for what tiny white Dolce panties look like…

    • wild flower says:

      Wow, thanks! Those are great pictures of that guy/model that CB posted earlier. Nice undies.

  11. SFRowGuy says:

    Hate her. Jon you need to get a new girlfriend … or boyfriend. (nudge, nudge, wink, wink)

  12. maxine says:

    Free the HammDong!

  13. anneesezz says:

    So he’s a “never nude” now? Whoever believes this is a pretty naive.

  14. taxi says:

    When did Jennifer go all “modest”? She’s ok with showing herself off pretty freely.

  15. A Fan says:

    Hopefully, someone with enough *balls* as he has, isn’t going to let his girlfriend boss him around.

  16. Mandy says:

    Really Jennifer, you can’t have the hammdong all to yourself. She has to share!

  17. Lexi says:

    He does look like he has a big one , but in all the pics i have seen it doesnt look like his thing is very comfortable, hopefully be forced to wear underwear will be more comfortable