Kate Winslet ‘desperate’ to give her third husband lots of Rocknroll babies

Ugh, I bet Ned Rocknroll smells like Patchouli. Let your mind wander when you look at these photos. What do you think he smells like? What does his O-Face look like? Does he wear his necklaces to bed? Think about it. That’s what Kate Winslet married last December. I would feel sorry for her, but I have to admit, I think Kate and Ned are incredibly happy together. Kate Winslet, one of the most talented actresses of her generation and winner of every acting award out there, is the happiest she’s ever been now that she’s with a man named Ned Rocknroll (who smells like Patchouli and probably weeps after sex). Ew. I bet he thinks he’s really good at tantric sex too. He looks like That Guy.

Where was I going with this? Right, so Kate and Ned got married last December, and they waited to confirm it until the day after Christmas. The announcement was met with a lot of groans, eye rolls and chuckles. But they’ve made it work for six whole months, so obviously Kate is thinking about getting pregnant right away.

Kate Winslet’s baby ship hasn’t sailed just yet! Kate, 37, who has two children, Mia (12) and Joe (9), from previous marriages, is desperate to add to her brood with her new husband, 34-year-old Ned Rocknroll.

“Kate knows how much Ned wants to be a father,” reveals a pal. “She thinks they would have the most adorable kid together, so they’re planning on getting pregnant by the end of the year. Having a child together is her absolute priority.”

[From Star Magazine, print edition]

I’m actually kind of surprised that she’s not already pregnant. I seem to remember that was her M.O. with her two other big relationships/marriages, right? She got pregnant with Mia right around her engagement/marriage to Jim Treapleton (it was a shotgun wedding or maybe she had already given birth, I forget) and I believe she was pregnant when she married Sam Mendes too, right? Kate is That Girl. She cements every marriage with a child (or she cements every child with a marriage, depending on how you look at it). She’s on her third marriage, so obviously she’ll get pregnant a third time. Prepare for the birth of Patchouli Elvis Rocknroll. Or Hummingbird Rain Water Joan Jett Rocknroll.

Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet and WENN.

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32 Responses to “Kate Winslet ‘desperate’ to give her third husband lots of Rocknroll babies”

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  1. Nicole says:

    Wow. He should never grow out his hair again.

  2. mkyarwood says:

    I think she’s one of those ladies who carries well and gets to have hot pregnancy sex. It was 16 months after my pregnancy test before I even let my husband touch me again.

  3. hadleyb says:

    Maybe she’s pg already, it seems like shes been packing on the pounds recently.

    Kate is the new Liz Taylor, I think by the time shes 65 she will have been married at least 7 times.

  4. fran says:

    You are wrong. She married her first husband in 1998 and their child was born two years later. It was with Sam Mendes that she was pregnant when they married.

    • GeeMoney says:

      Um… she married her first husband when she was pregnant, not the other way around. Check your facts.

      • K says:

        Sorry, but you’re the one who needs to factcheck. She married her first husband in 1998, Mia was born in late 2000, and they split up a year or so later. She was indeed a couple of months pregnant when she married Mendes – it was in spring 2003, and the baby arrived that winter.

        I remember because her babies bookended my university career, and she was massively more famous at the time in the UK, where I live.

        She does seem to have babies early, though. Having said that if both men cheated… I don’t think she’s to blame for being on the third marriage, really, especially as Mendes left her for the OW.

  5. Jaded says:

    Bwahahaaa!!!! Smells like patchouli…weeps after sex! I nearly sprayed my keyboard with coffee!! He probably chants every morning and names his house plants too….

  6. lady mary. says:

    Love Kate ! ,too bad we dont see her in the media a lot ,that ridiculous looking husband srsly doesn’t deserve this fiesty woman,i would have loved it if she had got on with Joe Manganello,or Gerald butler,
    ps: Kate has one of the Best smiles in the world!

  7. Shelly says:

    I still can’t believe she married a dude who deliberately and legally changed his last name to Rocknroll. Her coolness factor dropped A LOT for me after she married him. And I hate saying that, because I do love her, but damn, Rocknroll?! Really? I liked her with Sam the best. I wish they were still together.

    • ya says:

      I felt the opposite actually – ever since Kate Winslet went blond, I’ve felt that her media image has been so over-packaged…. I miss the ‘old Kate.’ But I love that she married a guy named Rocknroll – totally increased her coolness factor for me!

  8. Carolyn says:

    Hehe Joan Jett RocknRoll…that’s brilliant!

    Kate strikes me as someone who gets bored in relationships after a few years. Her other two husbands were nice men and there was no drama in either marriage?

    • Liz says:

      With Sam Mendes there were rumours he cheated on her with Rebbeca Hall but I don’t think it was confirmed anywhere.

      • The Wizz says:

        I think Sam was cheating on her for a couple of years.

      • K says:

        Given he’s very much with Hall and has been ever since that point, I think it was more than a rumour.

  9. Jess says:

    I love that she married a guy who willingly changed his last name to Rocknroll as it finally explained to me how she managed to be such great friends with Leo ‘Pussy Posse’ DiCaprio. Answer: they’re both d-bags.

  10. Dhavynia says:

    OMG with a face like that why would I want to imagine what his face looks like during O? ???

    You can add him to the same Casper what’s his face list ugh

    The Patchouli comment made my day…

  11. serena says:

    Let’s just hope she stick with him and doesn’t go for another wedding-baby.. because if so in ten years we’ll be right back here.

  12. Amanda says:

    She’s only 37 and on her third marriage?!

    • judyjudyjudy says:

      Liz Taylor was on her fourth by then. Kate’s a slacker! So is Angie Jolie who is only on #3 as well.

  13. fabgrrl says:

    Ew! He is so gross! In that last photo she looks like a glamorous movie star and Dude can’t even be bothered to button his damn shirt properly, much less wear a tie! Don’t even get me started on his smirky face!

    WTF, Kate? This guy must dynamite in the sack, or something. The hell?

    • Cerulean Skygirl says:

      Ned is actually the nephew of Richard Branson, so I think by default he’s a super gazillionaire. Perhaps that’s part of the allure for Kate. A dude who has his own money (well, trust fund baby) so she doesn’t have to support him or be the sole breadwinner. Actresses/models seem to be drawn to men who are… let’s just say…”not as attractive” who are instead powerful & wealthy.

  14. aenflex says:

    Say what you will – I adore her. Dunno why. Just do.

  15. TOPgirl says:

    Her husband is super fug!

    • Stacia says:

      Lol…He’s got a nice torso and toned legs in that first pic, but the face is not happening. I’d bag it(his face) and then tag it (hit it).

  16. choppersann 13 says:

    Wears his necklaces to bed?! Ugh…why do I know this is true? Why is this so gross to me?? :/ must just be b/c its him…yuck

  17. ya says:

    They make a really cute couple!

  18. Ginger says:

    What a strange couple…she’s so beautiful and he’s so…odd? I can’t explain it. I don’t even know how in the world he landed Kate.

  19. taxi says:

    If his contribution to their pooled genes is intellect, the kid could be in trouble.

  20. irishserra says:

    Oh man, Kaiser, you called it!! Preggers!