Eminem on his prescription drug addiction: ‘I literally thought I could control it’

Eminem has been clean and sober for something like four or five years. When he was promoting Relapse (2009) and Recovery (2010), he gave some of the most brutally honest, take-me-as-I-am interviews of his career, where he discussed in detail his addictions, his recovery attempts, his near-death experience from overdosing, and his eventual sobriety. Eminem admitted at the time that his biggest problem was with pills – specifically, Vicodin and Ambien – and he would take dozens of pills a day. For what it’s worth, I do think his recovery circa 2009 has stuck – I haven’t heard anything about any relapses since then.

So, Eminem decided to talk to the documentary filmmakers of How To Make Money Selling Drugs. At this point, I think talking about how far he fell and how bad it was has helped him. Part of his healing process is telling his story, and once again, I feel like Eminem is being brutally honest:

In a new documentary How to Make Money Selling Drugs, Eminem is opening up about his scary drug abuse, revealing that he almost died during one overdose. The rapper, who entered rehab for sleeping pill addiction in 2005 and addressed the problem in his 2010 album Recovery, has admitted in the past to taking 10 to 20 Vicodin (painkiller) pills daily. “Valium, Ambien, the numbers got so high I don’t even know what I’m taking,” he told Vibe magazine after his rehab stint.

Now, in the new documentary, the 40-year-old reveals that his prescription drug abuse nearly killed him. “My bottom was going to be death,” he says in the film excerpt on YouTube. Recalling the first time he had Vicodin, he explained it was a “feeling of ‘Ahhh,’ everything was not only mellow, but didn’t feel any pain. It just kind of numbed things.”

The Detroit native said that it was hard for him to realize that he had a problem since he wasn’t abusing drugs like crack or heroin.

“I don’t know what point exactly it started to be a problem, I just remember liking it more and more,” he explained.

If friends tried to tell him to get help, “I would say, ‘Get that f—— person outta here, I can’t believe they said that s–t to me,'” he recalled. “‘They don’t know nothing about my f—— life, are they out of their f—— mind? I’m not out there shooting heroin, I’m not out there putting coke up my nose, I’m not smoking crack’ … I literally thought I could control it.”

The abuse did catch up to him, though, as he reveals his scary brush with death when he was hospitalized following an overdose.

“Had I got to the hospital about two hours later, I would have died,” he said. “My organs were shutting down. My liver, kidneys, everything. They were gonna have to put me on dialysis, they didn’t think I was gonna make it.”

Once leaving the hospital, Eminem says that he didn’t sleep for three weeks and relapsed a month later. “I remember just walking around my house and thinking every single day, like, I’m gonna f*ing die. I’m looking at my kids, and like, I need to be here for this.”

Explaining that he had to regain his motor skills and talking skills, the Grammy-award winner shared that’s come a long way since his days of drug abuse.

“It’s been a learning process,” he said. “I’m growing. I just couldn’t believe that anybody could be naturally happy or naturally function or be just enjoying life in general without being on something.”

He added, “So I would say to anybody, ‘It does get better, you know. It just does.'”

Eminem is dad to Hailie Jade Scott, 17, whom he had with ex Kimberly Scott. They divorced in 2006. He also has adopted two other daughters: Alaina “Lainie” Mathers, the child of Scott’s sister, and Whitney, Scott’s child from a previous relationship.

The film, which opened on June 29, also features interviews with Russell Simmons and Woody Harrelson.

[From Us Weekly]

CB and I have talked about this issue often with regards to celebrities (not to mention normal people). There is something inherent about the prescription drug addictions where people think that kind of addiction isn’t “as bad” as being addicted to, say, cocaine. People think that if you’re popping a few pills, it’s fine, it’s not like you have a problem, it’s not like you’re smoking crack or something. But prescription drug addiction keeps getting more and more prevalent, and so many of the overdoses we’ve heard about in the past few years have involved “legal” drugs rather than illegal ones.

Oh, and I love that Eminem is the father to three daughters. That’s some cosmic justice right there.

Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet.

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49 Responses to “Eminem on his prescription drug addiction: ‘I literally thought I could control it’”

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  1. marie says:

    I’m glad he’s willing to talk about it and share his experience-hopefully it will help someone. I do know a few pill poppers and they think since they have a prescription and it’s legal, they’re allowed to take as many as they want.

    even though I don’t think it’s a popular opinion among ladies, I am a fan of his music.

    • PinkyTuscadero says:

      agreed. rap is misogynistic and early on he was a bad offender. but people, and their music, change.

    • Apsutter says:

      I used to dislike him for his lyrics about women but then I saw that he adopted his ex-wife’s two kids who aren’t his blood. That speaks volumes about his character and I think that he takes being a parent very seriously.

    • brumhildawayne says:

      You’re not alone. I like his music too. Actually, I really like Eminem a whole lot. Always have. I find it easy to forgive his blunders, perhaps because he often owns up to them.

    • Ginger says:

      Love him too! Even more now

    • Regina Lynx says:

      ITA.

  2. Mich says:

    I’ve liked him ever since he got clean. That said, the man needs to pull his pants up. He is far too old to be walking around with his ass hanging out. Ridiculous.

    • GoodNamesAllTaken says:

      Whenever I see pants worn that way, I just imagine how uncomfortable it must be, and how much effort it must take to keep them that low but not let them fall off, and how it would just wear you out after a few hours. It has to be one of the dumbest looks ever.

  3. Lb says:

    Hailie is 17?!! Jesus, I feel old. Eminem always holds a special place in my heart. I hope he continues to succeed on his recovery path.

  4. Aussie girl says:

    I remember reading a while back that he had adopted his ex’s kid plus her sister. Im going to assume they were not fit to raise them?? if this is the case than thst in it self is amazing!! Oh and kudos for his soberity

    • Spooks says:

      Yeah, and I think he also parented his little brother because his mum wasn’t capable.
      I also read somewhere that he lets local kids play basketball in his backyard. He seem like a pretty decent person.

  5. pinkerton says:

    hmm used to be a fan till I realised it’s not ok the shit he has said about women, gay people etc. I hope he didn’t bring that toxic stuff home to his daughters. that’s all.

  6. LEM says:

    a huge part of his sobriety is that he quit touring, which says loads about how serious he is about it. he knew that being on tour was detrimental to his sobriety, so he cut that out of his life.

    • hazeldazel says:

      +1

      i think he said he wasn’t gonna tour until he could figure out how to do it sober (or how to stay sober). Speaks volumes.

    • Jayna says:

      That’s the hard part, going back on tour with all the enablers. I remember when Dave Gahan finally got clean miracuously after suicide attempts and ODs from heroin/speedballs, clinically dead, they put out the album but didn’t tour as he was too fragile regarding a potential relapse. A year and a half later or two years later they did a tour with a sober coach with him at all times, from the second he left the stage and the meeting places for AA or NA at all his stops on the road, which he attended. Even his bandmates didn’t get it and drank in front of him, which they didn’t consider bad. He said it was hard for him, even watching them having a drink at dinner. When they wanted to get drunk, he stayed away from them on tour.

      They only tour every four years, but he’s been sober so long now that he’s vigilent about it and doesn’t need a sober companion, even if his wife isn’t with him.

      Eminem is smart to understand his weak point and how it could go so wrong again until he sets up touring in a way that he feels comfortable with.

      • Jo 'Mama' Besser says:

        Yup, I remember. DG isn’t the only one in Depeche Mode with substance issues, though–Martin Gore is also in recovery for alcoholism. Dave’s problems got all of the attention but MG was drinking so much that he was falling into seizures. I was certain, CERTAIN that they would die as a result of their addictions but they both turned it around. Rough times back then but dang if Songs Of Faith And Devotion isn’t a killer album.

  7. serena says:

    I like these brutal honest interviews, I appreciate them. He’s coming clean now and I can see it so that makes me like him again and more.

  8. Tess says:

    I’ve always had a soft spot for him, although maybe that’s because I’m a Michigander. I give him much respect for raising those three girls, Hailie and then Kim’s daughter Whitney and her sister’s daughter Alaina that he adopted. He seems to love being a dad

  9. PinkyTuscadero says:

    I love Em for this honesty. It takes courage to be the biggest white rapper in the game and to also admit to addiction. It’s a real gift that he’s giving to young people (and some of us older types too) and I hope he gets back as much as he is giving.

  10. Isabel says:

    I just adore Eminem. I’ve always been a huge fan of his work, but as he’s grown into sobriety, my admiration for him has grown.

    When he’s talked about women in his work in a derogatory fashion, you have to bear in mind that its a performance outlet to deal with the absolute shit his mom and Kim have put him through in life. Despite all of that, he STILL adopted these girls to provide them with the best life possible. He didn’t have to…but he chose to save them from their own hell. Marshall Mathers is the man.

  11. MAP says:

    I am happy that he cleaned himself up, and good for him that he’s decided to be public about it.

    I also think it’s amazing that he’s adopted, and is raising, two children who are not his own. Denise Richards gets a lot of props for taking care of the twins (rightfully so), but Eminem did the same thing, and should also be lauded.

  12. Gabby says:

    LOVE HIM.

  13. MissNostalgia says:

    Nice looking guy!

  14. Izzy says:

    I admire how hard he’s worked at his sobriety and maintaining it, and I love his music. But dude needs to pull up his pants, he’s got a cute butt and should show it off more in a well-fitting pair of jeans!

  15. Jayna says:

    I’ve never understood addiction to alcohol or drugs, because I don’t have an addictive personality, per se. But when I hurt my back, I was put on Vicodin, label. I have to say beyond it taking the edge off the pain, I looked forward every morning to getting up and taking my Vicodin. There was this sense of well-being that rushed over me as a nice side effect. I remember a governor’s wife whose husband was in some scandal saying Vicodin got her through it, the feeling it gave her. I understood what she meant. It was the first drug (and I’ve done a few in my life when young socially) that I ever really liked and looked forward to taking and seemed to give me a lift. Just label, not generic, which didn’t give that feeling.

    But even then, as much as I felt it became a crutch for a year, I never took more than one a day, at the max one twice a day, as more than a half or one pill at a time just made me very tired. I might have taken more if it took away my back pain, but it didn’t past half or a full pill just taking the edge off the unrelenting pain.

    So I can’t imagine taking so many a day you lose track. I remember Ben Affleck said he was taking ten a day. I can’t even fathom that.

    But, honestly, I have to admit, even though once my back was better (Thank God) and I never asked for any more prescriptions even for as-needed, there is a part of me that would stil love to have a Vicodin on hand now and then just for the lift it gave me.

    • boppity says:

      The “lift” you’re describing is what those of us with addictive personalities lose after we’ve been on a prescription like Vicodin for a short time. You take more and more to chase that feeling, it’s a vicious cycle because you’re getting the effects of the drug even though you don’t ‘feel’ it anymore. That said, you don’t have to work your way up to more than the prescribed dose to be addicted. You can take exactly what you’re prescribed, and it can still mess with your personality. There’s two people in my life right now that desperately need to be off of their pain meds because they cannot recognize how it changes their personalities. Neither of them takes more than prescribed, but it is still too much; they are different people – angry and mean – on these prescriptions.

  16. PrettyTarheelFan says:

    This is my confession…
    I love this man. I love his music. I know it’s violent. I know it’s often misogynistic. But I can’t seem to stop myself. He’s so damn clever. I’m almost afraid every time I read an interview that I might not love him anymore, and then, I walk away, still in love. He’s my number one celebrity crush, and I’m so glad he’s clean and sober, and I love that he’s clearly an adoring father. I want to stalk him but I have this weird distant-adoration thing going where if I ever were to get online and try to read gossip about him, or go somewhere to try to meet him, it would feel weird and gross. Instead, I just wait til he puts out an interview and consume every word repeatedly. They are just so. damn. rare.
    It’s kind of sick.

  17. brumhildawayne says:

    I adore this guy.

  18. IzzyB says:

    I’ve just been diagnosed with spongiform kidneys and have 20+ kidney stones in my right kidney alone.

    I’m on 0 painkillers. I’ve been on Morphine, Vicodin, Ambien, all the big names before. Addiction is so easy.

    I’m lying here on my couch feeling like shrapnel is working through my kidneys, but I don’t trust myself with those tablets again.

    Here’s to hoping I can manage this 🙂

  19. Greenieweenie says:

    He’s so tense. And wiry. I just want him to relax. I can see why he’s so keyed up when he raps.

  20. Ginger says:

    I was in a short term outpatient rehab for drinking after an extremely tough time in my life. I have been sober now for 3 years. I take my sobriety and my mental health very seriously now. I’m so inspired when I hear about others walking the same path. Kudos to Eminem for discussing this issue so honestly. I was really shocked to find that the majority of folks in the program with me were teens who were addicted to pills. I was shocked to find out about pill parties, kids sharing their parents drugs in school that they lifted from the medicine cabinet, about corrupt doctors selling meds out of the trunk of their car. It was truly eye opening. A lot of folks who are addicted to pills will turn to Heroin when they cant get any pills. How bad it that when they turn to Heroin as a secondary drug? There are a lot of people out there that are hurting. It’s indeed a rough addiction cycle to break. They need a ton of support.

  21. Diane Mars says:

    I definitively love this guy. His music, his personality… And his honesty.

  22. Mew says:

    It takes some real strenght to get out of that kind of addiction.. yeah, ppl always think they have it under control (like anorexics) but it controls them, always. Good job for him to making it and getting out of that hell.

  23. Twez says:

    Vicodin is acetaminophen (Tylenol) and hydrocodone. Acetaminophen can destroy your liver, pretty quickly at that. Even just 5 Vicodin a day puts you in the danger zone for acetaminophen overdosage.

  24. andrea says:

    Wow, he adopted Kim’s niece and other child? Thats actually pretty amazing.

  25. dcypher1 says:

    He is a dilf. He’s so hot. He sounds so grown up and mature now. I think its funny how he’s got three daughters now after all that girl bashing he did. He’s a hot papi.

  26. Chells says:

    The 1 thing I would NEVER do again is be with someone depended on any type of narcotics/alcohol. I was so naïve in thinking prescription pills aren’t as bad as street drugs…theyre worse! My ex was the 1st & only person I was ever with who had a problem w prescription pills & the year I was with him was the HARDEST I ever spent with anyone (& I’ve had my share of LTR) we broke up & 6 months later, he passed away of an accidental overdose. Its that easy. I’m so glad to read that Eminem recognized his addiction & got help. Most are in denial or just never feel ready to seek help & unfortunately end up like my ex did.

    No matter Em’s past, he’s turned over such a new leaf & has always been a great dad to Hailey, & the other girls alike. CONGRATS EM!!!

  27. vvvoid says:

    My prescription drug addiction, to opioids, eventually led me to speedball using cocaine, IV coke, crack, whatever. It’s all the same, rx or not. It takes you to the same place.