Madonna does a Reddit AMA, jokes about Brangelina, doesn’t discuss Lady Gaga

I skimmed Madonna’s Reddit AMA (Ask Me Anything) yesterday, but I got slightly annoyed with the format and I sort of forgot about covering it. But I was reminded about it again this morning, so let’s discuss it. Madonna wants us to discuss it. She is – without a doubt – a master of the soundbyte. I mean that as a compliment. As much as I love big talkers like Benedict Cumberbatch (who can answer a yes/no question with at least five paragraphs of tangents), the more I do this job, the more I enjoy a celebrity who does brevity and pith well. And Madonna is one of those people. It’s not just that she gives short answers, it’s that even her short answers are noteworthy and quotable. It’s a gift. You can read Madonna’s AMA here, and here are some highlights:

On the most embarrassing moment of her life: “There’s so many. When I went out on stage and said hello to the wrong city. Sleep deprivation.”

On the last dream she remembers and is willing to share: “Brad Pitt and I were living together and there was a small blonde child in the bed. Sorry Angelina, it was only a dream.”

On the best gift she got for her birthday: “I got a bong in the shape of a penis.”

On why she admires painter Frida Kahlo: “She was the subject of her art. All of her work is a self portrait and yet she shared universal stories and feelings by sharing her personal story. Also she was a freedom fighter and she lived a controversial life and was a survivor, so I admire her life story and art.”

On the issue she feels most passionately about, creatively speaking: “Censoring of artists, around the world. Censorship — for instance, Pussy Riot.”

On her upcoming secret project: “It’s a very ambitious project because it deals with very controversial issues…both global and personal. I’m extremely passionate about it. It means more to me than anything I have ever done before. In one week it won’t be a secret.”

On the one gay guy she wishes she could turn straight: “Frank Ocean.”

On her advice to her 20-year-old self: “Don’t take any of this personally.”

Have you tried making out with the grills on? “Yup it works.”

What do you really think of Lady Gaga? [Madonna refused to answer.]

If you were a gay man, would you be a top or bottom? “I am a gay man.”

Which music video was your favorite to make? “justify my love in paris”

Whats your favourite method of procrastination? “plucking my eyebrows”

Where should I put these hydrangeas? “Up your ass.”

[From Us Weekly & Reddit]

The hydrangea question made me laugh out loud. No joke. Bitch hates hydrangeas. For real. And I’m a procrastinating eye-brow plucker too, Madge!!! Sisters! I don’t know what to think about the Lady Gaga thing and how Madge wouldn’t answer those questions. It’s not like Madonna hasn’t talked sh-t (well-deserved) about Gaga before. I actually find Madonna’s previous criticism of Gaga to be extremely valid, but Gaga’s monsters don’t want to hear it and maybe Madonna was feeling generous about Gaga yesterday.

Photos courtesy of WENN, Fame/Flynet.

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44 Responses to “Madonna does a Reddit AMA, jokes about Brangelina, doesn’t discuss Lady Gaga”

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  1. Eleonor says:

    The Lady Gaga of the moment can get all the attention, but Madge is still here after 30 years, and after Squirrell mcTwerk I can nearly forgive Madge for her stupid grills and the awful plastic surgery.

    • doofus says:

      regarding the no comment on Gaga, I think that was a brilliant non-reply.

      I don’t have a horse in the Madonna v Gaga race, but I have to say that refusing to answer is better thrown shade than if she were to say something negative. any negative comment would be seen as “she’s just jealous because Gaga is young and Madonna’s old and obsolete” while a non-answer is akin to “she’s not even on my radar”.

      • Eleonor says:

        I had the same feeling. When Gaga was the thing of the moment Madonna talked about her, they even went to a tv show together, but after Born this way, and the Applause fail, Madonna refusing to comment, you know her 5 minutes are over.

  2. yu says:

    Madonna just made Reddit AMAs uncool.

    • Mindy says:

      Ok, thats manifestly untrue. She had over 10,000 posts and started a great “send photo” meme. Besides, Snoop Lion is the epitome of Reddit cool and he gave his stamp of approval. Cant believe I just defended Madge.

    • Mindy says:

      Ok, thats manifestly untrue. She had over 10,000 posts and started a great “send photo” meme. Besides, Snoop Lion is the epitome of Reddit cool and he gave his stamp of approval. Cant believe I just defended Madge.

      • yu says:

        I meant it in the way “who can top Madonna”. Say what you will, yeah she’s delusional yadi yada… But as someone said, she’s still here.

  3. aims says:

    I find her interesting after all these years. The hydrangea joke was hysterical

  4. hoopjumper says:

    She did a great job with the AMA. But my favorite moment was when Snoop, a pretty active redditor, asked her a question, she responded so nonchalantly that people where like, “OMG DOES SHE EVEN KNOW THAT’S SNOOP?”

    • Rosie says:

      Snoop showing up was awesome! Was that canoe reference a private joke between them or am I just uncool.

      Her best moment though was when she was asked why she thinks she is so controversial and her response was ‘I dont explain myself. Nor do I feel I need to”.

      I hate her music but I may have to force make all my gfs memorise that.

  5. Sixer says:

    Ok. I have to ask. Is it universal that hydrangeas are the bushes that live only in old people’s gardens? Or is that just British hydrangeas?

    (PS: grills are starting to freak me out).

    • SnarkySnarkers says:

      100% Im officially weirded out by Hollywood’s fascination with grills all of a sudden. It just makes me think of bad dental hygiene. Like all their teeth have rotted out of their heads. Gross.

      Am I the only one who completely relates to her favorite method of procrastination? This is my second comment about eyebrows today. I think I may have a problem…

    • Decloo says:

      I’m not old and I have them in my garden. I love them.

    • BW says:

      In the photographs, the grills look like rotten teeth to me.

      And because they are yellow, they make her teeth look stained. It’s very aging.

    • Lucrezia says:

      It’s a granny’s plant here in Oz too.

      When I put something off, we’re usually talking in the order of hours/days … maybe even weeks. If I procrastinated by eye-brow plucking I’d be drawing them back on with a sharpie.

      • Green Eyes says:

        LOL!!!! Hubby & my maloti poi Gucci shot me a look I laughed so hard at the draw in w/ a sharpie comment! I used to be that bad & hubby would ask why do that only to have to draw them in- but having hashimotos They were very bare looking at the end anyway). Fast forward 18 yrs to now chemo keeps me from using that as a procrastination tool.. And I’m finding I want a real sharpie as I’m tired of rubbing them off by accident and not having a brow on one side if face;). I find a sharpie in my color I may be desperate enough to do permanent one;)! Thanks got the laugh

        Oh & hydrangeas are favored by the elderly here as well.

    • curlsunited says:

      There are also free-range hydrangeas who live in places like Normandy, Britanny or in the Azores. 🙂

      (Good gracious, I actually comment on a non-Cumby post. I LOVE hydrangeas, that’s why)

  6. Yelly says:

    She’s looking quite haggard these days. And what the f is with that stupid grill?

    • yolo112 says:

      yelly, I concur. I look at her a feel a tinge of sadness. I’m always so embarrassed for her. I used to admire this person, dressed up in a million jelly bracelets and even drew a fake beauty mark on my face…now, as a grown woman, I look at her and laugh out loud.

    • Cazzee says:

      She would look good minus the grill.

      With the grill in, however, she looks like a rotting corpse.

      • KayLastima says:

        There is no denying that her face is supremely jacked. I always have to ask myself, “is that Faye Dunaway or Madonna.”? And that’s never a good question for one to ponder.

  7. Liz says:

    she is so obsolete now. I wish she would go away. her grill just highlights her desperation to seem young.

  8. Virgilia Coriolanus says:

    THAT GRILL! Ugh…

  9. Lflips says:

    This reeks of desperation.

  10. Adrien says:

    Redditors missed the chance to ask about Gwyneth (probably a non-answer too).

    • Pink says:

      I doubt the bulk of redditors would even be aware that Goop and Madonna were buddies let alone that they fell out.

      I mean I didnt even know till this year and you are talking about a gamers collective.

    • Sisi says:

      Darn I should’ve asked 🙁

  11. ladybert62 says:

    Her face looks old

    Those grills make her look like she has a mouth full of yellow rotten teeth

    Her arms look old

    Hiding her old looking hands again.

    • NerdMomma says:

      Well, she isn’t young. I don’t care if she looks old, but that grill makes her look terrifying. She looks like a witch who would show up in children’s nightmares.

  12. IceQueen says:

    Maybe she doesn’t feel threatened by Gaga anymore so she doesn’t think about her anymore.

    • LeilaG says:

      threatened!I don’t think so. Madonna said a lot of positive things about gaga in the past,she even went to one of her concert with her daughter Lourdes, but when gaga released born this way and refused to admit that it was sort of “inspired” by express yourself calling the comparisons between both songs retarded that’s when madonna struck

  13. smee says:

    Those grills give her the derp!

  14. GByeGirl says:

    I agree. Feeling threatened by Lady Gaga is laughable. My daughter refused to believe Born this Way was so heavily influenced by Respect Yourself until I played them. She was speechless.

    I do like and respect Madonna, but she is so…ridiculous at times. She was painful to watch on Graham Norton. I almost wonder if she has some sort of ADHD or something. She reminded me of myself when I’m off my meds.

  15. starrywonder says:

    Gaga totally stole Respect Yourself and Kat Perry’s Roar sounds just like that song Brave that I keep messing them up when I hear them on the radio.

  16. Bread and Circuses says:

    From a distance, grills just look like yellow, rotten teeth to me.

    Up close, they remind me of old-fashioned dentistry. Some of my oldest relatives used to have gold caps or strips of gold around the edge of a dead tooth.

    Either way, to me, it tends to make the person wearing the grill look gross and possibly of an older generation.

  17. Lucy says:

    Loathe the grill. The answers were genious, though.

  18. Jayna says:

    This shows Madonna at her best, quick, sarcastic wit. For the love of God, lose the grill, Madge.

  19. SuperDaly says:

    I LOVE Madonna. I LOATHE those grills. But I think Madonna is in on the joke on how bad they look. Why do people constantly harp on Madonna’s age and use the same hateful remarks about her when there are SO MANY legit things she could be criticized for?

  20. marina says:

    Her most embarrassing moment is going to be those grills. She is becoming a caricature of herself.

    • Lucy says:

      If that’s gonna be her most embarrassing moment, she has pretty much nothing to worry about, really.

  21. Nibbi says:

    i’ll always admire her for her, what, 30? years of bad-ass ways.
    yeah, the grill is dumb and it’d be an even more awesome statement of “up yours” and “i’m a groundbreaker” and “i’ve got nerve” to actually relax a bit about her face aging a bit and not work so hard on the implants and injections and stuff… but look at the stuff she says. she’s a bad-ass. and will NEVER be irrelevant. today’s pop culture landscape is pretty much just derivative of HER.