There’s some amusing Tom Cruise news this week that I didn’t cover because we don’t have photos of the event in question. A massive, $145 million Scientology “church” opened in Clearwater, Florida. This new center will be dedicated to giving people Scientology Super Powers (for real). Thousands of minions showed up to watch David Miscavige speak, and Tom was heartily applauding in the front row next to John Travolta and Kelly Preston. You can see photos of the ceremony here. CB and I think the pictures were doctored to make it look like there’s more parishioners present than there actually were. As in “clone tool.” LOL.

There’s also a new story about how Tom is trying to court his A Few Good Men co-star, Jack Nicholson, into joining him for a buddy comedy called El Presidente. Tom would play a Secret Service agent, and Jack would be the womanizing, alcoholic ex-President. Hmm:

Tom Cruise is throwing a Hail Mary pass to get the Warner Bros. comedy El Presidente made.

The project has been in development since 2010 and originally had Jay Roach attached to direct. The studio initially hoped that Jack Nicholson would be involved but it never came to pass, and later the project was eyed as a potential Robert Downey Jr. vehicle.

Now The Hollywood Reporter has learned that not only has Doug Liman come aboard to direct the project (he worked with Cruise on Warners’ sci-fi action movie Edge of Tomorrow, which will be released next year), but that he and Cruise have made a last-ditch effort to court Nicholson to play the former president.

Sources say that last week, Cruise and Liman went to Nicholson’s Hollywood Hills home to convince the 76-year-old semi-retired and extremely picky actor to take the role (Nicholson last starred in 2010’s How Do You Know). Cruise told Nicholson, with whom he starred in the 1992 classic A Few Good Men, that he won’t do the movie without him.

It’s too early to say if the sit-down proved effective, but insiders say the end result was that Nicholson agreed to at least read the script, which was written by Jesse Armstrong and Daniel J. Goor and rewritten by Paul Attanasio.

[From Hollywood Reporter]

I think Nicholson might go for this mess. Like it or not, Tom still usually fares well at the box office, and Nicholson had a huge bomb with his last movie (that awful looking How Do You Know). This could work.

This week’s issue of the Enquirer has a story (via Daily Mail) that says Tom desperately wants to get back with Katie Holmes: “There’s no other woman in his life, and he he wants the three of them to be a family again, especially with the holidays around the corner.” Tom’s rep refused to comment on the story, but I think it’s safe to say when a woman feels the need to use burner phones when arranging a divorce, there’s no going back. Poor Tom. He can’t handle the truth.

Photos courtesy of AllMoviePhoto & WENN