Pamela Anderson filed for divorce from Rick Salomon earlier this week. They were married for the second time January and split less than six months later. Anderson and Salomon’s first marriage in 2007 lasted just two months so this is progress. (Anderson was also married to Tommy Lee from ’95-’98 and to Kid Rock for less than a month in 2006.)
Up to now we haven’t known why idea why Anderson and Salomon split, but it’s not like anyone expected them to last. Anderson may want to explain things. She has posted a very long, wordy poem to her Facebook page in which she heavily implies that her breakup happened after she found out that Salomon was up to some kinky sh*t online. I’m going to rely on E!’s bulleted highlights here, because the original is difficult to decipher. It’s some kind of treatise on her identity as a sex symbol preventing her from having a genuine relationship. At least that’s what I got out of it, there’s a lot to read into:
•”I love being in love– but expectations,
make it impossible to be happy-
or satisfied…”• “Tradition…just seemed so romantic…,
I guess it’s a used up ideal —
for the old fashion…
not modern…”•”Ordering sex on line-
is like ordering a book on Amazon–
and … snooping eats you alive–
A mirrored action. obsessive love…
unhealthy, hopeless- knocked sideways—”•”No man knows what to do with me–
I blame myself–
To play with me, is eternal–
I’m not ‘on the clock’ or…
on the ‘payroll’—”•”I knew it was wrong from the start–
primitive– base instinct..
Never marry a rich man…
Euros from a Vagabond..”•”I wonder how prostitution works-
Does it ever feel good?
Lost little souls – being taken advantage of–
or taking advantage of-
Is it just for money? Is it for attention?
or — both—”•”I know I won’t compete with a computer–
or – a gaggle of hollywood boys hiring poor
Russian girls to swallow loaves of bread
up their anus’?-”•”I miss PLAYBOY-
The End of an Era–
Chivalry, elegance-
Celebrated imperfections –
differences… hot—passionate dreamy scenes…
The girl next door– shyness– “it’s my first time”
but – not my last….(wink)”•”Is it healthy, to be fantasied about…
by many men –?
Isn’t that the goal-
How many can we effect–
It’s natural– to want to be desired—”•”You know- It’s not freaky enough,
to just be beautiful–
I’ve never felt beautiful-
I always felt sexual… and blind..
oh wowwy… I’m losing my mind–
I’m shutting down– It’s such a strange feeling…
going numb… in front of everyone—-“
I can’t tell whether she’s saying that she checked Salomon’s web history and found that he was into bizarre sex stuff online, or whether he was ordering prostitutes or both. Not that it matters, I just wonder about it.
There’s more in the poem that hints at serious problems in her relationship and how she’s suffering. She writes: “It doesn’t feel good to be used, neglected, ignored—
controlled….
I’m not doing this—
It’s humiliating – I have to turn this around–
Settling is powerless- desperate–
an illusion–
Can’t buy your way out of this one …buddy!!”
Anderson also references drug or alcohol abuse. “feeling empty, sad– withdrawn- Left to Isolate– Medicate.”
I really, really hope she’s ok. She sounds very vulnerable and upset and I hope she has friends around her. About two months ago, Anderson revealed that she was sexually abused as a child. (Some of you mentioned that she opened up about this in the past.) It sounds like she’s really struggling with her relationship and her sense of well being. I’m worried about her.
Photos are from mid June from the Taormina film festival in Italy. credit: WENN.com
This is really sad. I hope she’s getting counseling.
Yes, she needs to let herself be with a nice guy. I mean, Rick Soloman, really??? Or any of her exes.
Or maybe she needs to GET COUNSELING.
A mentally ill person + a relationship =/= a mentally healthy person.
Even a really good relationship with a good person is not the same as going to therapy. Sure, it might be good for her (and anyone else) to have the support of a partner while she heals, but that’s ultimately all a partner can do.
Sorry for ranting at you, but it’s a huge problem that people with mental illnesses (and especially women) think that getting into a relationship will magically make them healthy. It doesn’t. 🙁
One could also contemplate that she also prostituted herself, from that poem, I have no idea. But whatever the case, she had some type of catharsis through it.
That has been the widespread rumor about her for years, but it’s more in terms of her being paid to be someone’s “companion”. No matter what, she has some pretty messed up patterns when it comes to men. They get together and it’s one big party, and then it quickly falls apart.
The blinds are that her husband is her pimp 🙁
Pam’s a mess, but I always find myself rooting for her.
+1
+2
I also got from her poem she is having a hard time aging and losing her looks.I do think Rick Solomon hurt her.He has always been a sleazy guy.I do feel like she is in a very bad place right now.Sort of having a midlife crises.Pull through Pam and stay strong.
Women aren’t supposed to stay young forever silly. Ageing is not a disease. She looks awesome at her age. I think this experience is a good thing. she’s had 3 losers now she knows what to look for: and you’re not going to find it in Los Angeles, so Pam I hope you get travelling. And yewh, L.A. is over run with russian hookers. These guys are sleeping with the enemy and actually paying for it. So, if you see a russian girl in l.a., you know she’s for sale, and will do anything, and I mean any thing for a coach bag, a meal, ect….
Lily, I REALLY take issue with your statement;
“So, if you see a russian girl in l.a., you know she’s for sale, and will do anything, and I mean any thing for a coach bag, a meal, ect….”
I have many Russian friends in LA, and NONE of them are for sale.
Okay, sure, no one is ‘meant’ to stay young, but one is meant to have one of the world’s deadliest toxins shot into his or her face, get said face pumped full of fillers, get it cut and stretched and pulled back behind the ears, have harsh and abrasive chemicals eat away at its top layers or take freaking lasers to the face, spend hundreds or thousands of dollars on the the most ‘age-defying’ face creams, when we know that alpha-hydroxy only does so much, beck, no one is meant to go Esterhazy and bathe and inject themselves in virgin blood but–but it happens. To look older? Not likely.
lilly what a strange comment.Yes we all age and no it it is not a disease it is a process and a fact of life.Some better then others.But someone who was held as the perfection of beauty and a sex symbol for a long time it has to be hard for her.And that whole Russian rant.What did that have anything to do with Pam?
I mean, she’s never really been okay. There’s a history of drugs, alcohol, and broken relationships with abusive men.
I feel so sorry for her…this is so sad. I hope somehow writing about it is therapeutic for her, but even more, I hope she has good friends around her now.
You can do this Pam!! Stay strong.
She is a wrecked soul.
She’s always been somewhat unwell, especially where men are concerned. She married a scumbag and he’s acting like a scumbag, what a shock.
Poor Pam.
I hope her sons don’t follow her on Facebook.
Oh man..that was a depressing read.
This whole thing is so textbook.
I feel for her, I really do. She definitely makes terrible choices when it comes to men, but this is not uncommon for victims of sexual abuse.
At 35 I can recognize how hard it must be for women who’s identities have been wholly tied into a “sex symbol” image, to age. If your self-worth is directly contingent upon how much male attention you receive, you probably feel a strange sense of loss and deterioration of self as your looks decline.
Couple that with the normal depression that accompanies a break-up and I would bet that she’s in a pretty dark place right now.
Also, if she repressed her experiences with abuse for many years and is just now starting to deal with it, she could be viewing her past choices through a new lens.
I hope she’s ok. I like Pam.
You rock. I agree with everything you say.
You just have to keep reminding me of our age, for shame! I’m kidding, but I agree with everything you say here.
Right dude?
I always tell myself “just enjoy it because you’ll never be this young again.”
You put it so beautifully.
I legitimately hope she’s okay, there’s always been something vulnerable and likable about her. I’d love to see Pamela relocate to Europe where it’s a bit more acceptable to be an ageing sex symbol (Sophia Loren and Brigitte Bardot for example- y’know, sans being fined for inciting racial hatred or whatever- don’t do that, Pam, that’s Brigitte’s thang) and get more involved in her charity work.
Great points, TOK.
At an early age women must learn to value themselves for something other than their looks (even if their looks are what the rest of the world is focused on). I am so grateful to my Mom. She would say things to me like, “After you left the office today my co-workers told me how beautiful you were. I told them that you were even more beautiful on the inside, that is what is most important.” (Of course that was coming from my mom, so she has a lot bias in that regard!).
For my nieces, I have been following the site “A Mighty Girl”. It is REALLY awesome. They feature books, toys and movies “for smart, confident, and courageous girls”, like “Rosie Revere, Engineer”, etc. which counter societal stereotypes about girls and women.
Our society is not kind to women as they age. A lot of it is subtle, people stop noticing you, stop smiling at you, stop being casually courteous to you. Courtesy is dying out anyway but the older I get the more invisible I become to the people around me. It must be so much worse for someone like Pamela, who has been a celebrated beauty and has a career based on her appearance.
I like her, actually. It’s funny with all the talk about the soccer fan who became a model after being spotted by the cameras and people thinking it’s ridiculous, but Pam was discovered just like this. Playboy came after. And it’s amazing how some people take opportunities and turn them into something great. Pam does a lot of charity work. A lot of it is not on the news. I think it’s sad being so gorgeous and kind she can only find assholes to date, but this has a lot to do with her history of being abused. I hope she’s ok.
Why would ppl not believe becoming a model after being spotted at a soccer game?
Isn’t that guy in Cali being offered modeling jobs based on his mugshot? On the other hand, his eyes are killer….I love blue eyed, dark men.
all those years of being nothing but a body and a face and an object is getting her down now and really affecting her now that she’s divorcing after months of being married.
i hope she’s ok too. i hope she strong and i hope she has support.
Poor baby. Sounds like she has some issues and needs some therapy. I hope she can find some peace.
Oh Pam. She’s doing that thing where she feels as though she is unworthy of love and yet somehow doubts its existence. She feels used up and I can totally understand why without even knowing why she divorced this guy. All she needs is one honest to goodness man to give her a hug and tell her she’s ok and stick by her side… but the chances of most of us getting that are slim and she’s Pam Anderson the sex symbol. The odds have always been so stacked against her. 🙁
Its like the Rita Hayworth quote “Men fell in love with Gilda, but they wake up with me.”
She’s defiantly going through a lot of deep and dark thoughts right now. I hope she’s able to overcome her demons. And for her poem, I hope she realizes the goal isn’t to be wanted by all men, or to be used by these men but to love yourself and respect yourself and be strong for herself and her children.
Rita’s quote is exactly what came to my mind as well.
I hope Pam will realize that others cannot make us truly content until we love and respect ourselves. And contentment is a steady state and not a flaming, brief feeling.
I noticed she used the word settled, which is what I suspect she repeatedly has done.
They both made the mistake of thinking men will make them happy, they need to make themselves happy and then find a nice man to spend time with, too much cart before horse and fairy tale fantasies. Pam is old enough to know better by now, kick the d-bags to the curb and go it alone. There are plenty of nice guys out there, she needs to stop hooking up with losers.
I totally relate to her on some of her thoughts in this poem. Glad someone else out there feels what I feel. Get well Pam.
Me too.
I’ve always had a soft spot for Pam. She’s never struck me as being the most secure woman based on her poor taste in men but she’s harmless and I’m rooting for her to come out on top.
Yep, worried. I imagine it’s hard when your whole public identity is wrapped up in being a hot chick…I like her, and hope she is ok.
Except that hair. She needs to fire her hairdresser.
Wow. To me, she is kind of like Britney. I know she’s a mess, but I feel like she knows it, too. And I don’t want to bust on her for it. Also, I think all women go through the insecurity that getting older can bring-esp. if you are one of the most famous sex symbols in the world.If we regular women go through it imagine how it must be to have the world watching you. On the other hand, if you are good with yourself and your soul is steady, you’ll be just fine. I’m 42 and even though gravity is being rude to me, and I see some lines, I’m happier than ever. I hope she gets there.
All the best Pam! Hope you find love and comfort one day.
I have a soft spot for her, I don’t know why.
I think she is at a point in her life where she is questioning about what she has done, what she has reached. When some months ago she has changed her hair and opted for a more mature look for her kids probably that was only the peek of the iceberg, and after she talked again of her abuse.
I hope this is a moment of inner growth that will help her to be in a more “adult” or “sane” relationship in the future and be more happy with herself.
Despite her sex symbol image, I have always had the belief that Pamela Anderson is a gentle person — a very sweet and kind hearted person who is misunderstood because of her sexy appearance. She has done a lot of work on behalf of animal welfare and you never hear of her slamming other celebrities or being a bitch. I think she is just a fragile soul, desperately searching to be loved for who she is, not what she looks like.
I truly hope that she can find some comfort and peace during her current situation. I also hope that she someday finds the love she has been searching for.
I agree with you….she always seems so sweet
I agree, it is sad. I think this is the first time we’re getting a real glimpse at someone who lived the life of a “sexual fantasy ” in the continuous public eye. Whether it’s her age or seeing her kids grown or another failed marriage, it seems like she’s realizing she can’t escape from what she worked so hard to convince us is true- that’s she’s a nicely dimwitted sex toy who wants to please. Or I’m talking out of my ass and it’s a whiner bullshit plea for attention. Tomato/Tomahto
This was one of the Marilyn’s issues at a certain point of her life she wanted “to be taken seriously” as an actress, but Hollywood (and men) wanted her to be the bombshell, no matter how hard she tried.
On a more different level it’s a lot of people experience: when people (friends, family) have an image of you, it’s very difficult to explain “I am not what you think I am”.
I do feel for her and hope she gets the help she needs.
She’s painted herself as a vapid sex object time and time and time again, and I can’t help but wonder how much of that plays into her psyche and emotional well-being currently. Were I her, I think I would go away to somewhere peaceful and beautiful with my children for a year or so.
Her hair is not ok
What’s with that awful hair?
Maybe after so many years of being a sex symbol she’s having a hard time coming to terms with aging. Everything has been based on her looks up to this point, and while she still looks great and her makeover has suits her very well, she doesn’t look like she did. Could be some kind of mid-life crisis.
Work it out Pam!!!!!!
And get rid of that jackass loser.
Wow. Just reading that hurt my heart, and I want to give her a huge hug. It was also a lot deeper than I would have expected. I feel for her, and I hope she does have friends and family to support her. She really is very beautiful on the outside, but she’s showing her beauty and depth on the inside, I hope she embraces that and runs with it.
Sounds like she caught him really screwing up…..no surprise there. I hope she doesn’t go back for thirds with that loser. He probably fed her all kinds of B.S., but he’s still the same POS she married the first time.
She is hurting and vulnerable. I wish her well.
I wish I could give her a hug. I hope she’s ok.
Remember what Rupaul says: If you can’t love yourself how the hell are you going to love someone else! I think there’s a huge groundswell of goodwill out there for Pam. I hope she gets through this dark time.
Pam is looking down the barrel at middle age (and soon menopause) which is challenging enough even for those with happy, stable histories. For a woman who made her mark as a pop tart, she must be scared stiff at what her future holds. There’s not much demand in HW for a middle-age kitten (coughNicoleKidmancough).
Loren may have been a highly sexual actor, but she’s continued to work as a serious actor because she has the chops and has made some good script choices. Also, she has aged beautifully. Can’t say the same about Bardot, who washed up years ago.
Pam, however, has never been a serious actor. I feel bad for her, as she’s got tremendous challenges ahead. But she also has the chance to reinvent herself. If she can only ditch the attraction to small men who f-ck her up. That informs everything.
Mid-life crisis is a very real thing. She is almost 47 with a career tied to physical looks. I hope she can carve out a professional and private life for the second half of her life. She could take on more serious roles, similar to what Farrah did in the 1980s.
More than anything, I wish she would stop picking partners who apparently bring so little to the table.
No casual swipes at Bardot please, she chose to leave the lime light so cats like you wouldn’t continue to tear her apart as she aged.
C-Dan & others have said for a year or more that Pam was broke & Rick bailed her out financially when they got (re)married. Before that, she was supposedly escort/dating very rich men but that income source was waning as she messed more & more with her face.
Pam was pretty & still has a terrific figure but aging is very hard for women who’ve not developed any other marketable skills or talents and who don’t have secure & loving personal relationships with partners and/or families. It’s even harder in a Big City, Bright Lights world where appearance is so heavily weighted. I feel sorry for her.
I knew that had to be a last-minute wig at the World Music Awards in Monaco, when everyone was freaking out, saying she had gone back to ratty extensions. She ditched the wig before she even landed back at LAX.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-2644429/Pamela-Anderson-looks-lovely-sexy-blue-outfit-short-hair-arrives-LAX-ditching-bizarre-wig.html
Love seeing her with her short hair again and I really hope she takes care of herself. She seems like a good person.
Very sad and worrisome. It’s not great poetry, but it does evoke genuine feeling and suggest a back story. She apparently felt ready to be more settled now, accepting the fact that like all of us she is subject to the effects of time, and she chose someone familiar for her long-haul, ever-after life. Clearly Rick didn’t get the same message. I read a kind of tragic desperation in it that I find concerning. I hope she’s okay and won’t go off the rails. She sounds pretty lost, alone, disillusioned and desperate to me,
She’s still gorgeous. Yes, she needs a collective hug. A young sex symbol’s real fans are the ones sexually attracted to them. As a sex symbol matures she just needs to remake herself.
Pam made herself the first time. She is her own creation. So if she still wants a career she could have one. She’s a household name that men who remember will always have a soft spot for and can now be “non-threatening” which gives you a female audience. So she has to stop marrying losers but remember that her issues are what made her a star anyway, so in the end she should accept herself and her hard journey. Second— pick a path that would be fun for her. Would she like to teach women how to mature in a sexy fashion? Follow in the footsteps of Raquel Welch. Does she want to model? Follow the Christie Brinkley model. Does she want to be healthy and fit, and then share how she does it? Follow the Suzanne Somers model. She’s a wonderful, beautiful bombshell and she can retire or better yet– remake herself in a way that could be a much more fun and useful than her first round of fame.
Agreed.All the women you mention are something to aspire too.They have all aged gracefully and are still beautiful women.I hope she can remake herself too.She seems like a sweet woman.
It’s so sad that her fondest memories are stripping repeatedly for Playboy and creepy Hef.
I remember seeing a bit of some reality show (she preferred calling it a documentary, I think, which did seem to fit). The camera showed just the legs of her two kids as they walked in one scene, and she said that’s all we would see of them for the rest of the series. That impressed me. Not even a hint of wanting to pimp out her kids.
Haven’t read all the comments yet, so I apologize if someone has said this already-perhaps because of her sexpot image whatshisface was expecting her to be more crazy, ‘freakier’, in bed, and maybe expected her to do things she wasn’t comfortable with? I know firsthand that can leave you feeling like a tool for someone’s lust (prostitute?) rather than a cherished, beautiful, appreciated human being. And maybe when she couldn’t satisfy his desires, he went elsewhere to find someone who would.