Eva Longoria has her wedding all planned for 7/7/07 in Paris. She’s taken care of all the important details, like the fact that her maltese dog is going to walk down the aisle in a custom suit and jewel-encrusted collar bearing the date of her wedding. The tacky red velvet invitations complete with a pop-up golden embossed eiffel tower have already been sent out to friends and family. Imagine her horror when fiance Tony Parker mentioned that he needed to concentrate on his new rap career and wanted to tour this summer, so couldn’t they postpone the wedding to Christmas time?

Eva Longoria flipped and jetted to Texas to confront fiance Tony Parker after he nonchalantly told her: We need to switch our July date to Christmas, because I’ll be touring to promote my new rap album! Accusing Tony of getting cold feet and wanting to duck marriage, Eva wailed: “The invitations are out and the plans are all set for July 7 in Paris!” Like a typical guy, Tony can’t fathom the fuss. “I didn’t say we weren’t getting married – I just wanted to postpone it to promote my album!” Here’s the compromise: The wedding’s on for July 7 – but they’ll cut the honeymoon short so Tony can tour.

[From National Enquirer print edition, Mike Walker’s column, May 14, 2007]

Details of Eva’s three day wedding extravaganza in Paris include:

• A chartered jet flight to Europe for family and friends
• A spa and shopping day for the women, courtesy of Eva
• Golf and lunch at a French vineyard for Tony and his friends
• Kenny Chesney performing at the reception
• Tony rapping at the reception
• Eva has hired party planner Mindy Weiss, who did Jessica Simpson and Kate Beckinsale’s weddings.
• Eva’s gown will be by Angel Sanchez
• A ceremony at the Chateau di Chantilly outside Paris, with white flowers and white candles throughout
• A reception at French club the VIP room, which is owned by a friend of Tony’s.
• Eva’s bridesmaids will be her three sisters and best friend, Britney Olsen.
• Tony’s groomsmen will be his younger brothers and French friends.

[Details from National Enquirer print edition, April 30, 2007]

With all those details taken care of, Longoria must have been floored to hear Parker act like it wasn’t a big deal to move the date back. After all, J.Lo and Ben Affleck cancelled their big wedding right before it was about to happen and look how well that turned out.

I give these two nine months. They already broke up once and got back together. Once Parker gets a taste of the groupies he’s not long for marriage with a half-pint control freak.