Sarah Hyland breaks her silence on abuse: ‘people have to go through things’

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One of the more shocking stories of the past few months (although nothing is more horrifying than the Mama June situation) was the news that Modern Family actress Sarah Hyland, 23, was in an abusive relationship for five years. In her request for a restraining order against her former live-in boyfriend, Matthew Prokop, Hyland detailed a pattern of abuse which started with verbal and emotional abuse and escalated to physical abuse. Hyland sought help from her Modern Family costars to break off the relationship, and it’s good that she had friends around her because Prokop threatened to kill himself, set fire to her home, and harm her dog. He did this in front of witnesses who gave statements on Hyland’s behalf.

Hyland eventually obtained a three year restraining order against Prokop. She also was on the cover of US Magazine at the time, which had some insider-type details of her scary relationship. The cover stories on US are usually publicist supplied, so it’s possible that she gave them some information. Until now Hyland hasn’t spoken publicly about the abuse she endured, though. In an interview with Meredith Vieira, Hyland made a brief kind of vague statement that was very classy. She just quoted a poem, made a few platitudes about going through hard times, and moved on. She didn’t mention her a-hole ex at all. Here’s what she said, and you can see a video below.

“There are two quotes that I want to say,” Hyland, 23, said on Vieira’s daytime talk show without directly referencing her former boyfriend of five years. “One is a Dylan Thomas poem: ‘Do not go gentle into that good night. Rage, rage against the dying of the light,’ which is one of my favorite poems. It just strikes a chord in me; and also Robert Frost: ‘The only way out is through.'”

Hyland added: “People have to go through things in order to become the person they are today, and that’s that.”

[From US Weekly]

Boom done. Of course I would have liked to hear more, it would make my job easier as a gossip, but I admire how she handled that. She talked about going through some crap but she quoted famous poets and said she’s over it, basically. She also had her sweet dog by her side. I can’t believe that creeper would try to harm that beautiful dog. Only the lowest of the low hurt harmless animals.

This reminds me that the Halloween episode of Modern Family airs tonight! I don’t watch all the new episodes but I’m definitely taping this one.

Here’s the video:

Here’s Hyland at an event for the ASPCA last week. She’s partnered with Swiffer and the ASPCA to help advocate for dog adoption. Her white dog’s name is Barkley. Look at how she’s holding that other dog! It’s like she doesn’t want to make her dog jealous.

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Photo credit: WENN.com and NBC screencaps

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28 Responses to “Sarah Hyland breaks her silence on abuse: ‘people have to go through things’”

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  1. Sumodo1 says:

    No, they don’t.

    • whatevs says:

      Be nice to live in delusional land where no one goes through anything bad in their lives! What she is saying is that people go through things and you can either make it or not. That’s the real world and I think she is a wonderful example. She is letting people know that you can make it through. Hope you never have to if that’s your attitude. 😞

    • Mean Hannah says:

      I agree. People have to go through things but this is not one if them. However, she did handle that well – she acknowledged it without actually saying anything and alluded to working to move on. We make mistakes and learn from them and grow, but it’s sad that anyone had to go through an abusive relationship.

      On a superficial note, I love that black dress she is wearing at the Swiffer event and wondering if I’m too old to wear it at 40.

      • deehunny says:

        To respond to that superficial note, I think it can be a sophisticated/sexy 40 dress as long as it’s not too short!

    • littlemissnaughty says:

      Yes, people have to go through things (this being one of them) simply because they happen. However you deal with the situation, whether you run immediately or leave after a few months/years or never leave at all, if it happens to you, you have to go through it. That goes for everything in life. If it happens, you need to deal with it. Maybe her wording is a bit unfortunate but since she is talking about her own abuse, I think she can say whatever she wants and if this is her attitude, it’s her business how she deals with it.

    • Tiffany :) says:

      She has to speak in generalities for safety, I think.

    • lunchcoma says:

      Some people don’t. Until the world is a perfect place, some people do. If someone who’s been a victim finds comfort in stating their experience that way, I’m not really inclined to nitpick them.

  2. Talie says:

    Really? I found the clip so annoying. I feel bad for her troubles, but I’d never heard her speak before, weirdly enough. I don’t watch Modern Family and I never saw her anywhere else. She came off kind of weird.

  3. mernymerlyn says:

    I love her on Modern Family, her character has really grown.
    It’s such a shame to go through that at such a young age.
    He was on one of the earlier episodes and it’s jarring to see the difference between him then and now. He almost looked like McCauly Kulkin. Greasy hair, super pale and just strung out compared to what he looked like in that episode.

  4. aims says:

    Good for her. I’m so impressed with her strength and her whole attitude regarding her ex. I’d also like to point out, the modern family cast really seems like a family, for real. I remember when the show intervened with Ariel. It’s really nice to hear when they have each other’s back.

  5. GoodNamesAllTaken says:

    I think she handled it very well and I wish her the best.

  6. Alex says:

    I’m glad she didn’t say anything more. She should be able to deal with this privately. I’m very glad she got help and left because it’s very hard for DV victims to do so.

  7. elo says:

    Abusers frequently threaten to hurt their victims animals, it is well documented that this is one of the reasons many women do not leave. Luckily some shelters have picked up on this and started making allowances for pets at the shelter.

    • Arya Martell says:

      Yup. My abuser threatened to harm my cat and when I broke up with him for the final time he tried to steal her from me. Good news is that my final restraining order included an stupulation that he was not to come near Princess Whiskers (yes my cat’s name is Princess Whiskers) as well.

    • Azurea says:

      Yeah, they do. My ex-boyfriend’s sociopathic son threatened to kill my dog, to my daughter’s face. This after months of supposedly loving the dog. My boyfriend’s response? “Oh, he didn’t mean it, he’d never do anything like that.” Right…like when he twice knocked you to the ground & started choking you…Sheesh.

    • lunchcoma says:

      That was one of my former husband’s favorite moves. My cat. His dog. For whatever reason, I was more protective of both of them than myself, so it was a really effective way to stop me from leaving or protecting myself.

  8. Arya Martell says:

    Sarah has taken the same tactic that I have when it comes to discussing my past abuse. I don’t feel comfortable saying anything else about what I went through except it was an experience I needed to learn from and it moulded me into the person I am today. I really hope she has the support she needs to heal and that her ex stays as far away as humanly possible.

    Her pup is adorable. I want to kiss his head. Don’t tell my cat, she gets jealous easily.

  9. Aussie girl says:

    She has handle it well. I like her hair a bit lighter it’s making me think about going a bit lighter myself.

  10. Sam says:

    This is why it’s so important that protection from abuse orders cover animals. Right now, they do in about half (or slightly more than half) of all states. California is one where they do, so she is fortunate. I live in a state where they do not, but people are trying to change that. So many people stay because abusers threaten to kill or harm animals and so many animals lose their lives over stuff like this. You can look up if your state covers animals and if they don’t, you can write to representatives about this. That’s my drive-by PSA for the day.

    • Arya Martell says:

      At the very least does the judge have leave to include the animal in the final restraining order? I feel kitty & I got lucky in that even though technically including animals isn’t a law the judge included her anyways based on threats my ex gave.

      • Sam says:

        In some states judges have discretion to add to restraining orders and can include animals if they want, but this is dependent upon the judge – some will do it, some really don’t care. It needs to be enshrined into the law so that anybody who wants it can get it if need be. I don’t think there should need to be threats against the animals beforehand to get them covered, either. Not all abusers make their intentions known before they do something.

      • lunchcoma says:

        Some do, some don’t. My no contact order against my former husband didn’t include my cat, who he regularly threatened because he knew that was one of the things that would get me to agree to anything. There’s also the tricky issue of animals that the abused person is attached to but that aren’t their property – most people don’t think of pets as property, but the law does. If your abuser is the owner of the animal, you have a lot less recourse.

  11. Lucy2 says:

    I think she, and Meredith, handled that very well.
    Glad to see Sarah out supporting good causes and moving on with her life.

  12. GingerCrunch says:

    She seems sweet and good and real which is nice to see considering she grew up in the business. Her character on “Modern Family” has always been so fun to watch! Hopefully her ex is getting the help he needs.

  13. Mikeyangel says:

    As someone who had a very abusive father I can say for myself that it did help make me the person I am today. Of course I wish my mother and I didn’t live the nightmare for four years, but we came out of it stronger than if we had not experienced it. It is her situation, and I think her words are eloquent. I hope she has sought counseling and am glad she has a good support network. Unfortunately, statistics say that having been in a dv situation predisposes one to encounter it again. I wish her wonderful things.

  14. lunchcoma says:

    Masterful handling of that. I mean, she shouldn’t have to be so good at it to get public support, but that is just about the perfect way to do an interview when you’re in her position. I hope she’s safe and healing and has enough spare hours to read some more good poetry.

  15. Marianne says:

    I dont think she’s over it. I just think she really wants to keep as quiet as possible. Afterall, its not like she came out herself and said it happened, TMZ obtained some documents.

  16. Moi says:

    It could not have been said any better. She is wise among her years.