Candice Bergen is promoting her new memoir, A Fine Romance. The book details her marriage to French director Louis Mallie and how she survived his death and moved on with life. Candice discusses aging and the empty nest she felt after her daughter (Chloe) reached adulthood. The most tantalizing excerpts from this book (so far) involve diet. Candice loves food and isn’t afraid to admit it. She discusses her weight gain of 30 pounds since Murphy Brown went off the air in 1998. Candice’s career has remained steady (with a long stint on Boston Legal), and she doesn’t care about her figure any more:
She doesn’t care about weight: “Let me just come right out and say it – I am fat. In the past 15 years … I have put on 30 pounds. I live to eat. None of this ‘eat to live’ stuff for me. At a recent dinner party I shared bread and olive oil, followed by chocolate ice cream with my husband. A woman near me looked at me, appalled, and I thought, ‘I don’t care!'”
Her “skinny friends” are “miserable”: “They maintain their weight by routinely vomiting after major meals consisting of a slice of steak or a filet of fish. I am incapable of this. I crave cookies … all the things that dilate my pupils.”
[From Page Six]
Good for Candice for being happy with her weight. Most people can’t say the same thing, although a 30 pound weight gain on her tall frame isn’t too visible. I wouldn’t have noticed if she didn’t point it out.
What Candice says about her “skinny friends” … there’s probably some sarcastic humor with the bulimia jab. Hopefully these women aren’t Candice’s real friends, or they’ll all figure out she’s trashing them. If Candice knows these ladies well enough to be aware of their ED, she shouldn’t reveal such knowledge in her memoir. I like Candice, but she should have stopped at her talk of loving food. She didn’t need to elaborate on vomiting rituals.
Photos courtesy of WENN
Loved her in Sex and the City, wish they had given her a bigger role.
She was great! Nasty Enid who ended up with Vizzini! Loved it.
“He’s a HOBBIT!” Surprising how many opportunities I find to use that line.
If it’s true, what’s wrong with saying it? Sweeping eating disorders under the rug doesn’t make them any less real. Perhaps by her saying it this way, they will realize that they are not acting in a healthy manner. (Although to be honest, “living to eat” is not that healthy, either.)
If only it was the simple, for someone struggling with an ED to realize they are not acting in a healthy manner.
This.
I’ve heard that Line about throwing up more times than I care for. I think it was an offhand comment and I don’t think she meant it to be negative. At the same time, it’s those offhand comments that make those of us with eating disorders feel worse.
Love her though!
I have mixed feelings about her vomiting comment. On the one hand, it downplays what is a serious problem for some. On the other hand, it’s important for people to know that that is how many in Hollywood stay slim – not because it is so easy to be skinny or because the average non-skinny person is doing anything wrong. It is somewhat informative to hear from an insider that many celebs are harming themselves to acheive this goal and that it isn’t because they are just naturally thin or even because they work out and exercise. It doesn’t apply to everyone in Hollywood, but it’s safe to say that many are sacrificing their health because for them, healthy and skinny is unrealistic. No skinny-shaming here. I’m relatively thin, although probably not according to Hollywood standards.
I agree. However she probably should’ve spun it away from friends. Generalized it a bit. ED is a self-starting disease of the mind. Very sad, but IMO not comparable to cancer or MS, etc.
Why are we worried what her ‘friends’ will think of this. She is a 68 year old woman who already had a stroke.
We act like the worst thing you can be is overweight. Yet, a lot of women do a lot of unhealthy things to be thin. Bulimia puts a strain on your heart amongst other things.
Jane Fonda the queen of exercise was a bulimic and had to have all her teeth capped.
” ED is a self-starting disease of the mind. Very sad, but IMO not comparable to cancer or MS, etc.”
This might be why people with an ED often prefer to keep it hidden. It is indeed a disease of the mind, not on par with cancer, but perhaps distorted thinking that manifests itself in a physical way. But still yes, requires thoughtfulness and empathy from others. This is meant for understanding purposes, not directed at any one poster. I chose to highlight the above comment because I think it is generally held opinion in society.
There is nothing “wrong” with someone voicing their opinion; after all, it is simply their opinion. We can chose to accept her opinions or not, to validate them by making them personal and about ourselves.
aenflex, just because EDs are mental illnesses doesn’t make them any less serious or deadly than cancer or MS. In fact I’d argue they’re just as serious and also just as “biological.” Your brain is part of your body, what makes you think it’s somehow easier to control or manage mental illnesses than an illness that originates in another part of your body? It’s not and until people understand that the stigma will remain and people will continue to suffer in silence.
She said an ED is not comparable to cancer or MS not that it is less devastating or worthy of attention. But let’s understand here – no interventions, therapy, rehab or reordered thinking will rid anyone of cancer or MS.ever.
Well, no. But therapy, reordered thinking, only controls an ED. No one is ever cured completely.
Chemo helps, sometimes cures, cancer, sometimes it comes back after years. An ED, can be controlled and monitored and can be in remission for years as well.
Both kill.
I fully understand and appreciate the hell that is an ED but excuse me if I don’t engage in this race to the bottom with you. Here’s to good health and long lives for those we love.
You don’t need me to excuse you Imo.
I like a good discussion, but if that’s not your thing, by all means post and ill expect any rebuttal.
Living to eat….how refreshing. I love the way she is being honest in her statement. I am sure in past she went trought dieting mill and she perhaps is tired of all.
I didn’t think there was anything wrong with what she said either. When I read that quote, I didn’t think she was mocking or making fun of her friends. She just seemed to simply note that she was incapable of doing the same as them, which seemed like a fair enough observation about herself to make. Unless there’s more to the quote that’s missing and more inflammatory, I don’t see how anyone could really be offended by what she said.
Yeah, I actually thought she was joking, although I think she maybe took it a bit too far. I heard her voice so clearly in her words, it’s funny because I haven’t even thought of her really since Murphy Brown.
I’m not offended by it, but the comment had a whiff of superiority as if all of her thin “friends” were starving or purging to be skinny, when in reality many thin women simply watch what they eat/exercise, and don’t engage in any extreme measures to maintain a healthy physique.
It sounds like she’s really advocating for moderation, but that message gets lost in her generalization about thin women.
That being said, Candace is my mom’s age and my mom LOVES her dessert, so I can’t hate on her for that at all. I say, good for her for enjoying food.
I think I found what she said to be believable because her friends are in Hollywood. If my neighbour told me that the thin lady down the street was vomiting up her food, I most likely wouldn’t believe her unless I had absolute proof (and even then I probably would be reluctant to put stock in what my neighbour said). But with people like Diane Keaton and other celebrities later on declaring how they maintained their physiques through either anorexia or bulimia, I suppose I have no problem believing an actress like Bergen when she says that’s how her Hollywood friends maintain her weight. I also wonder how normalized bulimia might be in that industry — to an outsider like me, I’d probably want to keep that sort of disorder hidden but in Hollywood I wonder if it’s considered as normal as getting plastic surgery. So in a weird and possibly ironic way I could see her friends not minding that she shared the revelation (as long as she didn’t share specific names of who is doing it, mind you).
Yeah I can see your point.
Hollywood is known for taking very extreme measures when it comes to weight loss, and I also agree that the Hwood standard of “thin” is really outrageous and seems to get worse every year.
Also, I suddenly want cookies.
I’m surprised more people here don’t realize how incredibly hard it is to stay thin after menopause, even with diet and exercise. I watched what I ate last year and got up to running ten miles on Sunday and four miles three other days of the week, and I lost ten pounds. Couldn’t lose the other 20 I needed to lose. Once I stopped running so much, I put those ten pounds right back on.
And I don’t eat like a pig. I have a normal breakfast, salad for lunch, and have been having chicken/fish and a veggie for dinner and I haven’t lost a pound. Menopause sucks. And I believe her that older skinny women are not doing that in a healthy way, for the most part.
Agreed. I don’t see anything wrong with her saying it. One of society’s problems with eating disorders is that we keep them so hush hush. A very skinny girl runs to the bathroom straight after eating and we all avert our eyes. Candace called it out and good for her.
This is great gossip! I suspect it’s very true. All of these ultra thin models/actresses/society women surely aren’t that lucky – they probably do toss up their carefully controlled meals.
I imagine she sees it all the time and she’s tired of it. Hollywood is a strange place that is unlike the rest of the world, and she’s lived in it so long I bet she’s seen the gamut of unhealthy obsessions over food. Nothing wrong with pointing it out.
Love your body for its color, bone structure, height, etc. Accept your shape for it’s longness, it’s shortness, it’s wide hips, narrow shoulders, etc. But becoming apathetic and accepting the results of self-abuse or neglect is not the same thing and I don’t think I’ll ever be able to do anything but just smile and nod at this kind of self-deception.
Bergen expresses awareness that she’s fat – is apple shaped as far as her pictures show – a shape that shown to lead to heart disease. I guess it’s her choice to die how she chooses I just don’t like how obesity is paraded as some sort of “normal” and even healthy set point for some people. It’s as unfair to people as wasp-waisted fairy tale cliches and Kim Kardashian’s plastic fun-house mirror implants.
I am drunk. I live to drink. I don’t care. I am high. I live to shoot up. I don’t care. There’s absolutely no difference. It’s a genetic inclination to form addiction as is a genetic leaning towards obesity. But addicts to alcohol and drugs are encouraged and expected to fight it for their mortality, their families and for the quality of their lives. Why is this different? Is it just easier to enable? Maybe it’s because we’re afraid to hurt each other’s feelings. Doctors won’t even tell a person anymore! Ugh.
She gained 30 lbs on a relatively thin frame. That’s not obese. Not anywhere close. She’s not saying she eats 8 packages of Oreos a day. Just that she actually eats things like (gasp) bread and butter and chocolate.
I’m not criticizing the love of chocolate nor bread – not even Oreos. All are tasty awesomeness. My panties are in a wad over the whole “oh, good for her! She’s ok with being fat! Let’s everyone pat her on the back and cheer for that attitude.” It urks me is all. I don’t think we should be cruel about the human struggle to overcome our own tendancies to self-destruct in this crappy toxic eat eat eat culture but I think doing the opposite can also send the wrong message.
And – 30 lbs my butt… maybe this year but not in total since the show. She’s 5’7 and I have family and friends who look like her and fall between 180-200 lbs depending on shape. That’s at the end of overweight and creeping into obesity.
I’ve been down this road. I got comfortable in that shape too. I got used to making excuses in the mirror. I kept buying one more outfit to replace the one that I’d “grown” out of, all the while telling myself all sorts of gentle, delicate bologna to make me feel better in the moment and make it easier not to do anything about it. Eating without reading the label, sitting more than moving, indulging and even taking pride in my relaxed attitude about all. I remember dinners where I thought, “We’re all going to die some way! It’s a crap shoot! I’m going to enjoy today while I’m here. I’ve had a bad day. I’m tired. I’ve earned extra carbs and I want half a pizza! (then eating almost all of it).”
But then one day I had this opportunity but it required me to be a lot more active and suddenly I realized how much mass my poor heart was lugging around. It was a rude awakening! No one TOLD me I’d gotten so big! No one stopped me – I think a big reason was because all of my friends were just as big and would rather have dinner than take a walk. No one wants to hear or tell the truth because it sucks!
I think a lot of people are less active and do less with their bodies and lives because they’ve accepted that they are too big to do certain things. So they sit because it’s easier and they eat what they want because it’s so available. It’s a cycle. And this whole “I’m fat and who cares!” thing is going to make more people think that that kind of living is a thorough, full, joyous life and I’m sorry, but it’s not. It’s not only a ruse but it’s also Russian roulette.
Studies have shown that overweight people, even apples, who exercise, are more healthy than skinny people who don’t. The thinking is changing on this.
Drinking and using drugs is not comparable to eating. One must eat in order to live. Period. One does not have to “drink” (alcohol) in order to exist. One does not have to use “drugs” (illegal ones) in order to exist. One must eat food in order to exist. That’s a scientific fact.
Now, once you start talking about excessive eating and overindulging in various unhealthy foods, then lines get blurred as your health (arterial blockage or obesity, diabetes, etc.) comes into play. But let’s not pretend that using drugs or drinking alcohol is akin to eating.
Agreed @Santia
That is a perfect response, JenniferJustice. I thought her comment pointed out how most starlets stay that slim not because of “genes” but because they face pressure for their job and some of them do this as their resort to losing weight or staying trim.
Go Candace! Shame is for babies. Grown women don’t need it.
Love Candice and love your comment!
Yes! And I love that pic with her and Alan Alda
That does make me old, doesn’t it? 😀
Our family always gathered around the boob tube to watch M.A.S.H. late at night and I adored Murphy Brown probably because she was direct and sarcastic like me, but funnier.
But seriously, who is giving her the stink eye for eating bread. NO SHAME, CANDICE!
If that’s fat, I must be a bus…standards of beauty have changed throughout the ages. At one point in time, being rubinesque was the ideal. It still is in some cultures, even today.
Love her!
How is this fat? She looks normal!
I think she means “Hollywood Fat”….not “normal fat”….If a woman isn’t underweight in Hollywood, they are fat! So glad I don’t live there!!!!
Exactly. Look at her next to Diane. Diane looks like a clothes hanger in comparison.
Yes, “Hollywood fat” for sure. And I think Diane is bordering on alarmingly thin, from what I can tell.
Diane actually lost like 20-25 pounds a few years ago right?
I know, right? If Candace Bergen is fat, I don’t want to be thin. She looks great — healthy, happy, and not frail. Being underweight is much more dangerous at her age than carrying an extra 10 or 20 pounds.
As a fellow food lover (who, like Candace, would be “fat” only by H’wood standards), I’m glad she’s enjoying her food. Good food makes life more fun!
I doubt she would feel the same if she was 30 years younger.
I thought that too, but maybe in Hollywood weight gain at any age seems to be a weird issue. Even models in their 60s like Christie Brinkley seem to be intent on looking a certain way. I thought it was strange that someone would give a hard stare at Candace Bergin for eating as I have never encountered this in real life (and I’m much younger than her), so all I could deduce from that is either people in Hollywood or LA are incredibly weird and rude.
I wish only people in Hollywood were that mean. I recently gained a few pounds of winter weight and I’m now 125 pounds. My mother’s “friend” told me – to my face, that I got fat and have to stop eating so much. I live in Central Europe, very far from LA.
If you ever watch an episode of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills or Orange County, you’ll see just how obsessed with food they really are and this from a bunch of has-beens and wanna-be’s. They won’t eat anything with a gram of fat. They count their calories and all the restaurants they go to cater to this mentality. I can definitely see a group of Hollyweirdos giving Candice the side eye for simply eating dessert because the others in that cirle do not eat dessert – would not – ever! It would be like our reaction to watching someone eat a cat. Oh, the horror!
I thought the implication was that she did care then and she’s said, hell with it.
prob not. when i was younger and single, i watched my weight more. now that i”m almost 40, i’m tired of the weight rollercoaster and find it harder to care about being in shape. i’m sure it would be different if i was single, though. as you get older, you care less about looking hot to men
Franca, I get your point, and I’m willing to bet that, 30 years ago, Candice also played the Hollywood Thin Game. Now, at 68, she just couldn’t give a toss about doing what (I can imagine) she had to do to stay thin in order to get parts. I love this lady.
I’ve always loved Candice Bergen!!!! Loved Murphy Brown for being a strong, independent, woman’s role….Personally, I think she looks great!!! She is almost 69 years old and she is beautiful!!!
I had the good fortune of meeting her and I will tell you…
…the FIRST thing I thought when I stood next to her was “OMG, she is even MORE beautiful in person”. Like, STUNNING. and so so so nice.
Also LOVED Murphy Brown!
OMG, I loved Murphy Brown!
Murphy Brown was the best. Loved the entire cast. Was sad to hear Robert Pastorelli (Eldin) died a few years ago.
I saw her in person once on 53rd and 6th outside the China Grill. You are right, she is radiant in person. She’s got a huge glow!
My old boyfriend’s father worked with her on her old “Cie” perfume ad in the 1970s, and this man had met Farrah Fawcett, Jaclyn Smith, Lauren Hutton, and many other women. He said she was the most beautiful human being he had ever seen. I don’t think her beauty even translates to television.
That was a great show. I loved her strong female role and relentless sarcasm.
What the…When did Alan Alda turn into Mr. Magoo?
*hums MASH theme*
Candice looks good. Murphy Brown was one of my faves.
Hollywood is a weird place. She is certainly not fat, I bet she falls in the higher end of normal on a BMI chart. But we usually see very, very thin people on tv.
Candice has always said and tried to do what she wanted, even after having grown up with Hollywood pressure to be perfect. More power to her and her happiness.
I agree. I’ve always found her refreshing and far more level headed than most of her peers who grew up in Beverly Hills. She’s always been her own person.
I’d much rather see someone eat for the pure enjoyment of it, than constantly deny themselves for vanity/health’s sake. The people I know who live life to the fullest, also love good food. I love how Candace doesn’t feel the need to berate herself for not looking like the HW ideal. That kind of confidence is so refreshing to see in a woman. I’d eat a dessert and share a laugh with her any day.
It must be very liberating after a lifetime of staying Hollywood thin to say “to hell with it” and eat generally what you want.
I’m sure after watching someone you love, wither away with cancer…trying to have a perfect figure isn’t in your top priorities….
I love what she says and I love how she says it. Of course “fat” is a term she is using in the context of the entertainment world’s unrealistic standards. The “all my skinny friends are bulimic” is hyperbolic but probably true enough to make the point “that weight comes at a high cost.”
I loved how, on Boston Legal, she was portrayed as a bombshell (she is) notwithstanding her age and relatively normal weight. And not just “attractive” but “BAZOOOOGAA!!!” eyes-bulging-out attractive, throw-down on the desk sexy.
And I loved her diatribe against sweater sets on Murphy Brown. Hilarious. Also because I am wearing one today and it’s just as twee as she suggests (gift from mom; nothing to wear; it’s black).
Agree on every single thing. Including wearing black twinsets. 🙂
Sometimes that’s what’s clean!
Being as lean as you can without being underweight is an excellent way to stave off cancer and all kinds of diseases. That, and maintaining it by eating healthy rather than by eliminating food groups or whatever fad diet is going around. To say nothing of an ED.
Beyond a certain age, that ceases to be true. More than one good-sized study has demonstrated that a few spare pounds (not a *large* number, mind) has results in better health outcomes for older adults. Here’s one: http://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/274624.php
She looks wonderful. I see you reason why she had to address her weight.
So, can we agree she has had no work done?
Maybe, except for all that damn botox in her forehead which has rendered her far less recognizable than the weight gain she discusses.
You are right about the forehead. I couldn’t see it on my phone but I can now.
I’m just here waiting for the “she’s skinny shaming” and “I’m naturally thin, poor me” comments these kind of topics always atract.
Yeah, there’s a lot of ‘victims’ out there.
Candace is lovely, intelligent, and refreshingly articulate. Amen!
She looks happy and healthy and age-appropriate. She’s a role model, and she maintains her zest for living.
So agree and it’s all about the “zest for living” as opposed to starving oneself to match an unrealistic mold.
There she is next to Alan Alda. They both look great!
There was a great article in the NY Times about Alan and his wife a few weeks ago – very touching.
AA is my fantasy dad. I loved Hawkeye.
Me too 🙂
I still love that show
Radar was my crush.
<3
I really wish fat women (using her words here) would stop justifying their extra pounds by pretending that women of a normal weight use extreme and harmful measures to maintain their healthy weight. If Ms. Bergen wants to be overweight by eating all the food, then fine. But let’s not throw thin women under the bus by pretending that it’s SO HARD to maintain the human form. There’s a disturbing trend now of saying that women who have thin bodies only look that way because of eating disorders. No, they still eat the bread. They just don’t eat ALL the bread.
Wide-spread obesity raised US healthcare costs by $315.8 BILLION dollars in 2010. As a healthcare worker, it’s not “cute” or funny to me. I’m the one who has to lift the overweight patients and deal with the sometimes violent and disturbing effects of their extra poundage. It’s a horrifying trend that shows no signs of slowing. When someone of celebrity reinforces this new message that a woman has to vomit in order to be of a healthy and appropriate weight, then I cannot get behind it.
I think she might be talking about people in her age range though. For her age range, she doesn’t look abnormally fat to me. If she were 30, I could probably see the issue with her words, but since she’s in her 60s, I wouldn’t expect a 25 year old to suddenly follow what Murphy Brown has to say about eating. I think 25 year olds would be looking at Jennifer Lawrence for inspiration (who is thin, though I don’t think abnormally so or anything).
it is hard to maintain a healthy weight. I’ve lost the same 30 pounds over and over again and it gets tiring, at some point, you don’t care if you have some extra weight. as long as you’re not obese, I don’t see the problem. I’m overweight and i work out HARD several times a week. there are thin girls at my work who i am sure do not work out at all so I am way fitter than them, even though I’m heavier. obese is obviously bad for your health, a few extra pounds not so much.
I agree, snowflake! I was always in great shape (without even trying that hard) until I hit my forties! And in that decade between forty and fifty, I gained over 30 pounds. Then I lost 27 pounds, then I slowly gained back 25 pounds, now I’m dieting and exercising again and I’ve lost 12 pounds…it’s such a drag…especially this time of year when there are Cadbury Cream Eggs EVERYWHERE! I think when If I make it to 70, I will be like Candace Bergen and just say the hell with it!!!!!!
RN
Your comment is assumptive and condescending. To you a woman is either your version of trim which equals healthy or she is not and she is fat and lacks discipline. You are shaming their bodies as well as their choices. My bff’s mom exercises and eats well balanced meals but she is never going to be thin. She is a healthy, vigorous, robust size 14 and is energetic, motivated and happy. Her sister, my bff’s aunt, is married to a lawyer who insists she stay under a size 6, she fad diets, uses fat burning pills, drags herself to the gym and smokes cigarettes when she feels the urge to have, like a buttered roll or something. But if you passed both these women on the street I know which one you would consider to be a drain on society.
This! Thank you!
All true, but in the post menopausal woman, some extra body weight in the face of normal activity makes for stronger bones (and less wrinkly face,lol). Not sure about how that benefit may outweigh the risks of higher body fat/increased breast cancer risk stratification. Individual consideration applies.
I have to respectfully disagree because firstly, the US food system has been given over to lobby interest that’s put crap in our food making it incredibly hard to lose weight. When they get you addicted to sugars that didn’t used to be in the food chain 40 years ago, it makes a huge impact on the population. This is not about will power here it’s about what they’ve engineered the food to do.
Secondly, while I know lots of women with great figures because they watch what they eat and remain active, I know just as many who do unhealthy things to stay that way and for some reason, no one wants to talk about it. I for one am not afraid of having that conversation. I’ve been fat, and I’ve been skinny and my preference is for non-judgement at either end of the spectrum.
Wild applause!
HK9, I’m with you on not judging people’s sizes and I’m also no fan of big agribusiness but I don’t think it’s fair to blame them for getting people “addicted to sugars that didn’t used to be in the food chain.” Unless you live in a food desert, which is a completely different can of worms, it’s not that hard to avoid processed foods and eat a healthy diet of whole foods. And still enjoy dessert.
I think part of the reason people eat processed foods and fast food is because of work schedules. I suspect more people would like to eat home-cooked, organic and healthy, but when you have to keep up your energy on a busy work schedule and long commute I can see how some people would fall prey to eating fast food. I’ve noticed even some cardiologists are a little on the chubby side, and all I can figure is maybe they’re that busy that sometimes they eat badly too. Then there’s Bill Clinton who used to eat McDonalds all the time, but maybe because he’s a man nobody seemed to be put off by the way he ate. It seems as though actresses relate these stories of people staring at them in awe when they chow down, but I never seem to hear about this sort of thing from male actors.
Many people do not understand the amount of chemicals, additives and preservatives present in their food. Still more simply can not afford to do any better, whether they live in a food desert or not.
/enthusiastic golf clapping and air kisses.
This.
At least she has a sense of humour.
Man, I feel sorry for any patients you speak to this way.
RN, I’ve been heavier than my BMI recommended mid-range all my life. From about the age of 10 onward. I’m not in need of a walker or a wheelchair (size 14), but I’m not slim. I never have been and I never will be, and I’ve accepted it.
I’m vegan. I don’t eat “all the bread.” I have NEVER eaten “all the bread.” I have never been a chronic overeater. My mother was obsessed with not passing on the “family curse” (guess what…everyone in my gene pool is shaped just like me) because she had spent her entire life taking crap for her size. So my calories were counted, my food was tightly portioned, and my activity level was maintained throughout childhood. She didn’t starve me or slap me on diets when I was an adolescent, but she was strict about meals and food. Guess what? I got chubby anyway. I look just like her.
I’ve never been “wow, you let yourself go” fat. But I’ve never looked good in a bikini.
I resent the ever-loving bujeezus out of holier-than-thou, condescending, disdainful, NASTY clinicians for the way I’ve been treated my entire life. I have serious anxiety about going to the doctor’s office because of the universally smug, condescending crap I’ve had to listen to from your lot all my life. Seriously, I had a nurse practitioner try to blame an ear infection on my extra 20# once. Fortunately, by that time, I was over 30 and I laughed in her pinched face. It’s still a joke between my husband and me. I burned my finger on a hot pan I was pulling out of the oven and he’ll say, “You know, your finger got burned because you need to lose 20 pounds. If you were thinner, you wouldn’t even NEED oven mitts.”
Every ailment I’ve ever had, someone wrote on the chart that I was overweight. Relevant or not…doctors have all of their collective knickers in a knot over my soft belly.
I workout. Every day. Bicycling unless it rains, and yoga in my living room. I chart my calories (because I will blow up like a whale if I overindulge), and I never–ever–consume more than 1500kcal/day except holidays, and then I allow myself something sugary with the rest of the humans at whatever gathering I’m attending.
I’m not bitter about my weight. I used to cry myself to sleep about it in my teens and twenties because life is terribly unfair in a society that equates my body type with bad character. But I’m married a wonderful partner (who can eat anything he wants without gaining an ounce…MEN!!!) who taught me that I don’t have to look like you to be worthy of love and praise and admiration. I just have to do my best, take care of myself, and ignore mean girls (and mean doctors).
My blood levels are always perfect. My bones and my joints and my range of motion are all where they need to be at my age. My eyesight and my hearing, and my circulation, and my heart, and my blood pressure are all in fine working order.
But you would resent having to lift me if I came into the ER unconscious. Because of some imaginary sum of money you think I’m costing you? Because my big boobs are violent or whatever? How dare you? Why are you working with patients if you hate them so much? Seriously. Get a job working with computers if you can’t develop empathy for the human beings who come to you for help.
@MrsNix,
I don’t know who you are, but you’re the best!
I agree with Pinky, you’re the best! You broke my heart reading your post. It sounds like you’ve had a long, hard road to self acceptance but I’m so glad you’ve made it! I guess you know that your body type is called the Endomorph and is the body type that gains weight most easily. It is so cruel that you are given such grief for something that is 70% hereditary. I have a couple of friends who have the same body type and I have watched them go through the same painful scoldings from health officials who ought to know to know we don’t all come in one body type. As in, They Ought To Know Better! I have also watched them both come to the painful realization that they are never going to look like the women in magazines no matter how much they starve and work out. It’s shameful how much outside pressure is put on these two lovely women. I saw their pain in every paragraph of your post.
On the brighter side I will tell you that the Endomorph body type is where I want to go when I need a good solid hug. And both their men say the same thing! Neither care a bit that their lady-loves don’t look their best in a bikini but are heaven when it comes to ahem, cuddling.
I’m bulimic and honestly, her comments don’t bother me a bit. Her take on food is refreshing – nothing to take offense at.
She probably mentioned “vomiting” to clear all talk of “good genes.” Sick of skinny celebrities insisting they were born that way.
Also, nit all thin women do unhealthy things to maintain that. Eating healthy and exercising actually feels good. And becomes your body’s preference if it is done over time.
Meanwhile, Alan Alda has been an effortless stringbean for 70 years.
lol…damn men!!!! My husband can lose weight by just stopping have a bag of chips with his sandwich at lunch. Meanwhile, I exercise, no carbs (except on special occations) no junk food…and it takes me twice as long as him to lose weight!
Whenever I read that women can’t bulk like men, I get a little mad. DAMMIT, I’D LOVE THEIR BULK AND METABOLISM.
I say good for her because she’s enjoying her life and her husband apparently is fine with it, HOWEVER, I saw her on Broadway a number of years ago, and honestly she was stiff as a board, did not appear to be comfortable in her body, and quite frankly, did look overweight. And I’m not judging her by Hollywood standards.
Love seeing someone who’s been through a lot and worked hard for a long time unapologetically treat themselves well. She looks healthy (aside from remaining one of our great beauties), so I think it’s wonderful!
I agree with what she says. And to RN 7 years ago I lost 81 pounds.I did it the healthy way. I do not have an eating disorder. I have maintained it by a strict diet with occassional feasts for special occassions. But I admit I don’t exercise. I have an overweight friend who works hard and exercises and I bet she is in better shape than me in a lot of ways. I am 60 years old and look great for my age according to people but I really need to do something physical. I live where winter is almost 5 months of the year so that doesn’t help.
She’s awesome and I think she looks great!
“I am fat. I live to eat and I dont care.”
She sounds depressed.
She sounds anything but depressed. It’s joie de vivre actually, with a pinch of provocation.
Then explain the botox. At least she’s honest about being overweight.
What’s botox got to do with depression and extra poundage? You don’t have to like cookies and crow’s feet at the same time.
True. But she does care about her appearance otherwise she wouldn’t have the botox. It’s a bit hypocritical to me. JMO
That could very well be.
She didn’t say she didn’t care about her appearance at all. She simply said she didn’t care about one aspect of maintaining appearance (i.e being fat or thin).
I see that as akin to some people caring about how their physique looks but being nonchalant about having having fully grey hair or having imperfections on their skin (i.e. Kate Middleton?).
In what place is she fat, again? she looks pretty slim to me
She actually looks normal and not fat. She just looks like a woman who doesn’t starve herself and enjoys food.
Actually, as someone who has been dealing with ED since age 12, I did not find her comment about her bulimic friends insensitive. It is probably the damn truth. And it is de rigeur for women in H’wood. Perhaps not all actresses are bulimic but BDD is the norm for them. I wish it would stop, but….
I’m looking forward to reading her book. Years ago I read her first memoir, Knock Wood, which she wrote shortly after marrying Louis Malle. She detailed her life growing up as the child of a major Hollywood star and her subsequent careers as a model and actress. She wrote very candidly and honestly about coasting on her good looks in her teens and twenties – she flunked out of college because she didn’t bother putting in any effort – and then having a crisis at the age of 30 when she realized that nobody saw her as anything more than a beautiful face. She worked very hard to re-invent herself and become a respected comic actress, and I have always admired her for that.
Even with her 30 pound weight gain, she’s still a healthy weight and far from obese. If she had gained 80 pounds it would be a different story because then you’re talking about health issues.
*Louis Malle (not Mallie)
Makes me think of my parents, particularly my mum. Over eating and always talking about food and dieting. I’ve been listening to it for twenty years and I’ll probably be listening to it for years to come. They fill their cupboards with junk food and then wonder why they keep over eating.
Really? This is what we consider terribly fat now? The woman is 68 years old. Being chubby is hardly the worst thing that could happen to her body, and by that point, who are we trying to impress? I work in a hospital, and most of us would love to see more elderly patients with some weight on them. Far unhealthier to be stick thin at that age.
She looked a tad like an aging Elizabeth Taylor,in the pic with Diane Sawyer (and I don’t mean her weight). That black suit doesn’t suit her gorgeous coloring the way the pink one did. Ladies, menopause is a real bitch. Your metabolism slows , your body shifts and unless you are rail thin — the clothes just don’t look good on you, and the mirror is painful. But rail thin means giving up the thin mints. And yes — food consumption is among your more enjoyable pastimes. I gained 20 in th last 10 years. And I would break bread (with olive oil) any day of the week with CB. love her!
Candice is not fat.
She looks great.
Her face looks REAL. We can see her life, her joy, her tears in her face.
To smooth all that out creates cloned barbie dolls.
Candice is Candice.
If she’s happy, cool. It’s not the way I’d want to age, although when I reach 120, I’m going to have Poptarts and Mario Kraft Dinner for breakfast and not give a flyin’ f.
See, I don’t read it as slamming an ED, I see it as the ridiculousness of the expectation that we all starve or purge to fit in, that the enjoyment of food is dismissed. Instead of being grateful for our plenty, we are afraid of being fat, myself included!
The thing is it is natural for women to gain weight at her age, some fight it (like my Mom, who drives me nuts with the fact she is still on a diet at this age when I wish she would just be more like Candice and enjoy her life). Candice probably eats a relatively normal diet by most people’s standards – she was definitely talking about Hollywood in terms of diet and perceptions of “fat”. The bulimia joke is slightly off colour and depressing to think of a bunch of 60 somethings barfing up their salads. I will say that having been briefly bulimic in amongst other disorders I don’t see how anyone could keep at it for years without it ruining their appearance, it rots your teeth and bloats your cheeks and gives you broken blood vessels and I imagine most of Hollywood resorts to other extreme, unhealthy measures besides bulimia.
I think she looks great. I would never describe her as “fat.”
What intake away from this post is just howbsesitive this issue is and will always be. What I read as a kind of off the cuff remark she made to emphasise a point means a lot off different things to a lot od people. All you have rondonisbmake a quick scroll down the comments and people’s pain and body confidence issues, whatever they are, are palpable.
But is any of this Murphy Browns fault, or is she just putting her two cents in? Golly.
I agree. Whatever anybody says about weight or eating will be both hated and praised by the masses. I don’t see that changing either. It’s always going to be an issue, especially among women because we are the gender under unfair pressure to maintain visual appeal. Honestly, I think women are worse to eachother about it than men influencing us. Women are constantly comparing themselves to other women, competing with other women, and judging other women. When a woman walks into our building, the men glance. But other women already there, are the ones doing the elevator thing – looking them up and down and internally critiquing. There is so much insecurity among women that manifests into some kind of a warped contest – it’s disgusting. This life is not a tournament based on attraction. If anything, basing one’s life on one’s level of attraction is tantamount to the test this life is – an epic fail – because only those who prove to be compassionate and supportive are winners.
She is fabulous and living it!!!
Since models always harp on this issue in interviews and bring up other models, I like that Candace mentioned an older crowd STILL battling this disease. Some may forget that these eating disorders are not JUST about women under 40.
At 68, I want to enjoy a piece of fine chocolate or a dessert w/o worrying about it going to my hips or boobs. My husband & I are foodies, so I am looking forward to those yrs.
my focus was on her and how she is living, not her unnamed friends and I hope she does not get a lot of flack for her interview.