Caitlyn Jenner has published a detailed essay about her experience preparing for and giving her speech at the ESPYs last week. I found it very honest, open and to-the-point. Those of you who have Caitlyn fatigue and who are understandably skeptical of her will most likely roll your eyes at this, but do me a favor and try to read it with an open mind. (Read the whole essay, not just my excerpt.) She has a simple, matter-of-fact way of writing. When she explains how nervous she was and how much of a big deal this was to her, it rings true. Can you imagine giving a telecast speech like that in front of a huge audience? Yes she is a seasoned celebrity athlete and an experienced public speaker but it must not have been easy. Factor in the fact that she only recently come out and this was huge. Here’s some of what she wrote:
She’s dyslexic and had to practice many times
As a dyslexic kid, my biggest fear in life was to go in front of the class and read because I just wasn’t very good at it — and that stays with you through your whole life. That’s why all of my speaking engagements through the years have been always off the cuff… But at the ESPYs, I really had to stick to the prompter because I only had a certain number of minutes… I practiced, and practiced, and practiced, and practiced to make sure I’d nail it.The toughest part of her speech
The toughest part in the speech was my kids. It was hard to look over there and see all of my children. As I said in the speech, I don’t want to hurt anybody. I just want to be myself. I barely got through that.She wishes her voice was more feminine
While I felt like I looked great and that the gown looked fabulous, I still have a voice issue. It’s not quite right compared to my feminine appearance. That bothers me a little bit. However, I hope that people don’t listen to the pitch of my voice, but listen to what I have to say. That’s important to me.On trying to raise awareness of trans issues
There is so much misunderstanding of this community that I’m in. People don’t understand trans issues or gender identity issues. Now I’m in a position to try to explain it to people, to try to get them to understand that these are serious issues that affect a lot of people. That’s what my mission has been from the beginning and I hope that I achieved that at the ESPYs. What an honor.
I especially liked how she explained that she felt like she looked great but was self conscious about her voice. As a person comfortable in your own gender, you don’t even realize that can be an issue. It didn’t even occur to me.
Over the weekend, Caitlyn went to gay bar The Abby in West Hollywood with her new BFF, Candis Cayne, and a camera crew, presumably for her show. I’m excited to see her show, which premieres on E! July 26th. That’s next week! I will be overseas but hopefully I’ll still be able to watch it.
Behind the scenes of the most incredible, unforgettable night. It takes a village… #GlamSquad #ESPYs pic.twitter.com/xMD0RW7mHE
— Caitlyn Jenner (@Caitlyn_Jenner) July 16, 2015
……..she doesn’t want to hurt her kids, huh……
A bit late for that, isn’t it?? I only wish Caitlyn the best but I will not watch her show or believe in her sincerity in being devoted to the transgender cause. I think that Caitlyn, just like the kardashians, is only out for herself and her pocketbook. Will she say the right things to get good press? Of course. Will some of that end up being beneficial to transgender people? Maybe. But that is not, nor has it ever been, her main goal. She is not out to be a leader in getting acceptance and understanding and support for transgender people.
She is also not really concerned about her family – all those children she fathered and then proceeded to either essentially abandon and/or ignore while being focused inwards. But now she wants to trot them out to awards and on her reality show. Makes me wonder who really drove the Kardashian ship…
And the fact that everything has to be documented about the dress, makeup and getting “glam”… ugh. It’s all the same Kardashian krap we get non-stop from the rest of them. There is so much more to being a woman than how many hours you spent getting the paint on. Granted, the media carries a burden of guilt on this one, gushing over how gorgeous Caitlyn is (I frankly don’t see gorgeous myself, just someone who tries hard to look younger with short skirts over knobby knees and tons of cosmetic surgery and makeup) but she could stop that train in its tracks if she wanted.
Yup. Every time I see a Kylie Jenner thread on here, I think about Kris and Caitlyn. I would feel that way about any celeb that I perceive to be a massive failure as a parent.
Totally. She abandoned her kids from previous marriages and clearly isn’t there for her current brood…..
(And I don’t give her a pass on her negligent driving that killed a woman, either.
You follow at a significant distance in general, but when pulling a loaded trailer you need to be extra careful.)
I don’t know if you have looked at Caitlyn’s website. I just have. She has a section called Ask Me Anything. You can ask anything and are not required to list an email address or name. There is also a good list of resources to reference.
@Vauvert +1
I wish she’d stop talking about her hair, make up and dresses for once and maybe acknowledge the fact that she was involved in an accident that took someone’s life. I’m sure that ladies family members cringe when they hear her say “she doesn’t want to hurt anyone”!
Plus, her elderly mother. Her mother seems supportive enough, but imagine the emotions.
This article made me wish for so many things. I wish Caitlyn could have been herself alot sooner. I wish that anyone who is going through this will be okay. I really wish that Bruce had never married that thing, but he did. And I wish he had been a better father to those kids, cause they are lost. I do greatly admire Caitlyn’s bravery. I wish her nothing but good things.
welp! there it is! everything that needs to be said^^^
Compassionate and very on point, kri. Nothing to add.
Well said.
That is good to hear, I am sure there are procedures that can be done, I have been wondering about the voice and if she will change it.
I used to want a more masculine voice or raspy voice like Demi Moore.
Unpopular opinion: I feel like Caitlyn has a very shallow perception of what it means to be a woman. Granted she had been surrounded by a wolf pack of surgically engineered women for over 20 years. But being a woman is more than getting your nails done, having a top tier glam squad, and getting double d bolt ons. I think she is misrepresenting the struggle most transgender women face and her constant pap walks trivializes their battle all the more. Caitlyn has become what the Kardasians are to women, a highly unrealistic interpretation of womanhood.
No lies detected here.
Over the course of time I am sure she will get it, Infact I am sure she understands the more emotional and psychological aspect than given credited for. Because she was trapped physically for a long time, her mind was her only outlet. This is just excitement, its like losing a bunch of weight and someone taking you on an unlimited shopping spree, you will go a little beserk.
“It’s like losing a bunch of weight and someone taking you on and unlimited shopping spree, you will go a little beserk.”
Spandex, all spandex!!!!!
Eddie Murphy in the Nutty Professor
Exactly. And, there is more to being a woman than surgically altering one’s face to resemble a duck or a cat. There was nothing wrong with Bruce Jenner’s original face. He should have left it alone when he started becoming Caitlin. Would have looked a lot better, imo.
Yes, I agree with everything you’ve said here. Just thinking though…ever since Caitlyn arrived, this is how the media has been reporting on her. Before, they never would have been talking about Bruce’s glam squad, and who he was wearing. Now that she has come out, the entire way she is being reported has changed on a dime. I find that confusing. Perhaps the only reason she is talking about these superficial and trivial aspects of femininity is because these are the questions she is being asked.
@Yabby – You make really good points in your comment. I wonder if we would say the same about Laverne Cox if she was more vocal as well. Laverne tends to play it cool and try to stay as neutral as possible, where Caitlyn just comes out with whatever she’s thinking. I try not to judge too harshly or accuse Caitlyn of “trivializing” anything, because I can’t imagine what it’s like to live a lie for my whole life and feel that jubilation of finally being FREE; I might carry on and on about how amazing it feels to be able to be “girly” as well if I felt that part of myself was stifled and trapped inside me for 6 decades. This is new to her. Let the woman live her life and enjoy herself. Caitlyn finally gets to dress the way she wants and do things that she views as the very definition as feminine and I think she is just bursting with joy and excitement over it. I’m not quite sure how that trivializes anything. Laverne Cox looks gorgeous and feminine every time we see her as well, but the fact that she doesn’t talk about it makes her a more serious advocate for transgender people and their movement?
It just puzzles me that people are so quick to accuse Caitlyn of trivializing things when so far in the short amount of time that Caitlyn has come out, she has met with young transgender kids and given encouraging speeches, and for the first time ever, been a transgender person to stand up on a highly publicized platform and call for acceptance…and perhaps most importantly, to stand there and say, “This is what transgender looks like.” I don’t see that as trivializing anything, I see that as trail blazing and I think that the absolute bravery that it takes to do what Caitlyn did at the ESPY’s is actually being trivialized by you, and I’m not sure why.
Laverne Cox is not a member of the world’s most superficial family, and has not made a fortune on living her life on TV. That’s the difference in a nutshell.
There is a deep mistrust of Caitlyn and her motives simply because of her association with the K-klan, and I’m not sure yet whether or not it’s unfounded. These are people who have repeatedly proven they will do anything to stay in the news. The skepticism would not be as intense if not for that fact.
@Bella-I appreciate the sentiment behind your comment, even if I don’t agree with it.
To be nitpicky, I REALLY wish the word “girly” would go away, particularly when used to describe traditionally-female clothing, cosmetics, or whatever artifices that some women use to create an image. I think in an unintentional way, you sort of proved Yabby’s point. “Girly” clothing does not a woman make. As Loopy pointed out, maybe with time Caitlyn will grow to understand this…. but my natural skepticism makes me doubt that she has the emotional depth or the life experience (that part is not her fault) to truly grasp the intricacies and nuances that we experience as the average female. I think it’s great that people relate to her, particularly if she helps to make young transgendered kids feel less alone in their struggle.
But for me, she is completely un-relatable and it has nothing to do with the fact that she’s transgendered and everything to do with the shallow bubble of wealth and superficiality that she lives in.
@Kitten – you should seek out @Jayna’s comment which features a quote from a Reddit Q&A with Navy Seal Kristen Beck, a 48-year-old transgender woman. She was asked about the emphasis on Caitlyn’s appearance and gave a really good perspective from inside the trans community in defense of what Caitlyn is currently going through. I wonder if you judge the people you actually know as harshly as you judge strangers. I find it so odd that so many people are expecting Caitlyn to be an absolute saint, so much so that any good she has actually done so far doesn’t even create a blip on the radar for the majority of you.
Unless you’re a transgender person, I don’t think it matters if you personally relate to Caitlyn, and unfortunately, we can’t all change the lexicon to better suit your needs, so the use of the word “girly” should really be beside the point. We could also use “womanly” or “feminine” but everything seems to offend everyone these days.
“I wonder if you judge the people you actually know as harshly as you judge strangers.”
I would think that it would be obvious, but no I don’t judge the people I know on a personal level the way I judge strangers. In that respect I’m in good company, being on celeb gossip site and all…..
I just found it ironic that you should be here on a soapbox about Caitlyn while reinforcing gender stereotypes by using words like “girly” and equating a curvy body type with femininity.
*shrugs*
“Unless you’re a transgender person, I don’t think it matters if you personally relate to Caitlyn”
Caitlyn is a woman and I’m a woman so yeah, I think I’m allowed to say that I don’t relate to her. I’m not sure why you feel that you’re the only one that gets to have an opinion. Just because I’m not fawning over her transition doesn’t mean that I don’t support her journey. You can respect a someone for overcoming adversities and still take issue with the personal qualities that you find to be unsavory. The two are not mutually exclusive.
Mostly, I don’t understand why you’re so offended by the differing opinions here. I don’t see why this is so personal to you, particularly when no one here is being rude or disrespectful towards Caitlyn’s experience.
@Kitten – I’m not offended by differing opinions at all. Sorry you’re taking it that way. I think by saying someone is a fraud, which is essentially what is being said, that is actually being rude to Caitlyn’s experience. I take issue with the harsh criticism here because the critics are all totally glazing over and ignoring the fact that Caitlyn has already done a lot for the transgender community and movement. I don’t think it’s fair that anyone would try to take that away from her and I find it disheartening. People can think what they want about the person Bruce was or the kind of person they believe Caitlyn to be, but to say she hasn’t done anything or not enough for the trans community is false. None of us can prove her intentions are pure or not, but the fact of the matter is that she has done things that have helped the trans movement progress.
I don’t at all feel that I’m the only one entitled to an opinion. On the contrary, I believe that is your sentiment. You straight up told me I was wrong in another post when I said I believed Caitlyn’s intentions are pure. I believe you used the words, “that is simply untrue.” I am using facts to make my point, and you are using your opinion, which I respect and disagree with. That is the only difference. Sorry if I have offended you or if there has been any confusion as to what I was trying to convey here.
Yes Caitlyn HAS done all those things, all while being followed around by cameras and filming a reality show! Kind of takes away from the sincerity of it all !
Agree with Shannon1972
Bruce said, during the Diane Sawyer interview, he would still be married to Kris if she’d been OK with his transition. That speaks volumes to me about Bruce’s/Caitlyn’s mindset. He would continue to subscribe to K’s vacuous and superficial (at best) lifestyle.
Now that he is Caitlyn I don’t believe wave a magic wand and TADA! Caitlyn’s now a deep, introspective, mindful–substance over style person.
I hope Caitlyn will prove me wrong.
@Bella-Well, factually I suppose only Caitlyn knows whether her motives are pure or not. To you they seem to be genuine and to me they don’t.
I don’t think that she is trying to cause harm or that she has mal intent. However, I do think her transition has been a calculated and strategic one and her image was carefully leveraged to maximize profit. That in NO way means that I think she’s a fraud. I believe that she has always felt like a woman inside and I’m happy that she’s finally able to embrace that, but I don’t think that she’s some special snowflake who should be immune to the same criticisms that I would level at any other celebrity. To you, it’s black and white–either you love Caitlyn and support her journey or you hate her thus invalidating her efforts to further LGBT rights. I’m trying to explain to you that my perception of Caitlyn is a far more nuanced one.
Take someone like Sean Penn. He’s devoted years of his life, hours of energy and time towards helping the people of Haiti. While I greatly admire his altruistic efforts, I still have a lot of issues with who I perceive Sean Penn to be as a person.
Leo DiCaprio’s environmentally-focused charitable work is one that is dear to my heart, but that won’t stop me from snarking about his love life.
(BTW, it’s worth noting that people have been far less kind in their criticisms of Penn and DiCaprio and far less complimentary than most have been towards Caitlyn.)
The truth is that Caitlyn has never shirked the public spotlight. With a public persona comes some criticism, some backlash and some opinions that might be less than positive. She signed up for this–this is the flipside of the coin.
Ultimately, we can agree to disagree. I have complicated feelings about Caitlyn that aren’t going to change, but I appreciate the discourse even if we’re not on the same page.
Answer to Bella’s first post:
“and perhaps most importantly, to stand there and say, “This is what transgender looks like.””
No, this is not what transgender looks like. I’ve seen several transgendered women at the prides in Düsseldorf, Cologne and Frankfurt, and I know one transgendered woman personally. They look nothing like Caitlyn Jenner. Because most of them simply don’t have the money for surgeries, expensive make-up, tailor-made clothes etc. pp.
That important fact was made clear by Laverne Cox, but Caitlyn says “this is what transgender looks like.” Oops. I don’t think she knows much about the real struggles of normal transgendered women (and of course men).
And I also think there are far better role models within the community.
It seems like such an emphasis on the physical appearance. And worrying so much about appearing and sounding as feminine as possible seems like a futile goal as there will always be aspects that will give it away. Technology and surgery can only go so far. It starts to seem obsessive and shallow. Hmmm. Who does that sound like??
An interesting Q&A on Reddit with Navy Seal Kristen Beck, 48-years-old, who is now a transgender woman, and a person who responded to what she said about the superficial aspects of transitioning.
“Kristen Beck: It has been a very fast transition since I’ve started this journey. I joke that last year in my teens I was into high-heels and fashion. A year later I think of myself in my 30’s and I’m into flats. Next year in my 40’s I’ll probably be into flip-flops and jeans like my GF. As far as designers go my favorite is DVF.”
[–]fehaar 2
Stay away from crocs and sweatpants girl, and you’ll be fine!
[–]bhaller
Love DVF! Can’t go wrong with classic style!
[–]psyne
“As people transition medically there’s basically a second puberty as the hormones affect them – as well as the kind of new mental/social experience of beginning to live as the gender they feel like. I think that’s what she means, her second teenagedom is the period shortly after beginning to transition and live as a woman. Newly transitioning trans women often go through a more girly style phase because they suddenly have the freedom to wear heels, dresses, etc., but after the novelty wears off she might relax into something more casual and not worry as much about fashion/style.
She said last year she was in her “teens,” this year is her 30s, and next year is her 40s – she means that she’s going through stages like we all do, but after a few years of transitioning she feels like she’ll catch up to where most ciswomen are at that point in their life (comfy and practical clothes with less concern about style).”
@Jayna – Thank you for posting this because this is really important. I get it that people are so skeptical or even downright anti-Caitlyn because they hate the Kardashians, but I also think people are being a little too quick to make judgements about things they don’t know about and don’t understand. I sincerely hope that your post will help others feel less judgmental and less quick to harshly cast off Caitlyn as a famewhore who is trivializing the trans movement.
+10000. And I still hate how shabily she treats her four eldest children. Bruce all but abandoned them and Caityn all but dismissed them as soon as the KarTrash coven started paying more attention to her. All in all I think this is the last person the transgender populace needs to represent them. I am sure there a million stories out there that are more inspirational than Jenner’s.
@Dawn – And Caitlyn’s children have all forgiven her for what Bruce did, so who are you to hold a grudge?
I agree with Bella on this and to add her older children have said they are starting to build a new relationship with with Caitlyn.
Yabby I totally agree with you. And many more people agree with your opinion also. Its not as unpopular as the media would have us believe.
Outward appearance is very important especially if you concealed your true gender identity for decades. If one wants to have gender reassignment, one must pass first some psychological evaluation tests before they allow reassignment. Iinm, someone who is transitioning should live like a woman, dress like a woman, get hormonal therapy for a few yeare.
I don’t think your opinion is unpopular. Most people in “real” life, and quite frankly on most other news or media sites, that I talk to feel this way about her, and it crosses political and religious lines. I tend to stay off Kardashian stories in general because they are sll so distasteful and I don’t want to give them the “clicks,” but I had found the cultural reaction to Caitlyn’s ESPY interesting, and there was some good dialogue here. The media has been propping her up as “brave” and someone to be emulated, and just like with the other famewhore “Ks,” the focus is shallow, self-centered, and superficial because they all are shallow, self-centered, and superficial. There are many, many transgendered people in this world who are people of depth, intelligence, and grace. This is not one of them, and I am very sorry that she has been elevated by the media as the face of transgendered people because it is most certainly doing more harm than good to most people’s perceptions.
@yabby this exactly!
I’m glad there IS a voice in pop culture for the disenfranchised trans people out there, but good Lord isn’t there anyone better ? Because Caitlyn Jenner really seems to think that “being a woman ” is all about what you wear and how you do your makeup. The entire female experience is, through her eyes, reduced to what you are wearing, how well you can do makeup, and how vixenish you can manage to appear. Being a woman is COMPLICATED. There is a lot more to it than having breasts and wearing makeup. Are women who no longer have breasts not women? Are women who don’t wear makeup not women?
Everyone is bending over backwards to embrace this new female, Caitlyn Jenner, and in theory I’m glad for the message of tolerance a a acceptance & equality.
But in reality, a wealthy, athletic, handsome, Olympic-winning, tall, white, republican-leaning American man has not the slightest idea what it means to be a woman.
I agree. I don’t think she gets it. I think she’s absorbed the romantic notion that women are just dress-up dolls and that life is supposed to be easier in that body. Sometimes I think that men who are weak to their sexual urges buy into this idea wholeheartedly in that they think that women have so much power because Boobs.
I hope I’m wrong and that this is truly Caitlyn’s home for the soul. Part of me still believes that she is not truly self-identifying as a woman, that it’s either delusion or a ruse, for attention or just the money and publicity’s sake. Imagine the thousand steps back it would mean for the transgender community for Caitlyn, in a year or so, to say, oops, nevermind. It’s already hard for some people to accept but imagine the set back if that happened. 🙁
I feel where you are coming from Yabby.
She has transitioned just a hot minute ago but I already saw her in article talking about working out to achieve maximum curves and I’m like “cant you wait a hot minute before being objectified as a sex object?”
After living with the Klan, it must be hard not to be shallow.
…Or maybe she just wants a more feminine body?
Now you you see I just don’t to see this woman nor her dysfunctional family. I glad she has transitioned and fight for transgender issues but Caitlyn and Kris and and their family are just a hot shallow mess of a minute. Not one of them are not trying to put themselves aside and look out for their family, like Kylie Jenner is about to marry an immature MAN-CHILD named Tyga, not one of them are even trying to get her out too focuse on her for reasonable sucess like staying in High School and going to college, and Look what turn out to be Kylie Jenner. Again a HOT DYSFUNCTIONAL MESS
She’s a very good speaker. I can see how Bruce had a career in motovational speaking
She is a good motivational speaker, why doesn’t she motivate his younger daughter to be better people, like Kendall being a better brand of a fashion designer or Kylie to stay in School.
I have read a lot of transgenders are self-conscious of their voice. I think for her children, ‘Bruce’s voice’ still being there is a comfort. It would be for me, while learning to accept my father becoming a woman. The voice would still give me comfort.
That’s why young transgenders not having to hide and having their parents support is so crucial. They can nip their voices changing in the bud by blocking puberty. Young Jazz, a transgender teen, was in an interview, and I couldn’t believe how lovely her voice sounds. When she gave a speech, an older transgender woman, who came out later in life, told her how lucky she was to be able to block all of that. For many transgender females, hitting puberty sends them spiraling, suicidal.
I enjoyed the article by Caitlyn.
I saw the same thing, and it was beautiful! Someone actually posted the link here after the Diane Sawyer interview to a documentary called, “I Am Jazz” and it was amazing. We may be talking about the same thing, but in part of the documentary, Jazz and other trans people were appearing somewhere, Jazz was the youngest person there, and an elder trans woman kept telling Jazz how amazing and brave she was and how fortunate she was to have the resources she did at such a young age.
Again, I have to reiterate that this is why I find what Caitlyn is doing to be so important. I would also love to see Jazz become more famous. The sooner transgenderism is accepted, the sooner people get to live their truth. The sooner parents understand that when their kids come to them and say, “I look like a girl but I know I’m a boy,” what they’re feeling is LEGITIMATE. Too many people are dying over this. Whoever gets the message out there and can help has my full support, whether it is Caitlyn Jenner or anyone else.
For anyone who wants to put a very real face on just how tragic and dire a 41% suicide rate is: Google Leelah Alcorn.
I have no love and little respect for the Kardashian//Jenner circus, but I’m really enjoying Bruce’s transition to Caitlyn. She has such a huge platform to inspire open mindedness and acceptance, and despite her fears she really seems to be embracing it. Living so long as the wrong gender must’ve taken such a huge toll on her psyche, but now that she’s finally her she’s really beginning to bloom.
Can’t wait to see how she progresses over the next couple of years.
Being a women is not just about make-up and hair. Hopefully Caitlyn starts to really get her hands dirty and helps some transgender causes.
I am so lucky that I was born female. I don’t even own a dress or skirt, have never worn makeup or jewelry, lasted 2 hours during high school graduation practice in high heels and broke open my piggy bank the very next day to get flat comfortable shoes that would be acceptable…. But as birthright female, I can do that because I don’t have to prove anything to anybody.
I hope Cait figures out that women come in all sizes and shapes and pitches. She’s a tall woman, even if she were birthright it’s less likely that she would have a high pitched voice. She’s been around the Kardashian Krew too long and should toss away the thought of taking them as her model. They distort themselves to match an extremely narrow view of what women should be. Cait dresses so much better than Kim and Khoe and her own daughters anyway.
I get very annoyed when people diss women for having “man hands” or “masculine features” or a “masculine voice” etc. Those hands and features and voices are women’s hands and features and voices by definition, deal with it. Men have to deal with the same nonsense if they have higher pitched voices etc. Got to get rid of the tiny boxes we get stuffed into.
Totally agree !
Jeez Caitlyn come out approximately 3 seconds ago and has already met with trans* kids, given a pretty great speech and is publicly supporting trans* causes, what more do you want in the limited time she’s had? Not to mention the constant picking on what she wears and how she looks, for a supposedly enlightened board there’s a hell of a lot of body policing going on around here.
The comments here are disheartening. I’m just going to choose to believe that the harsh criticism is coming from the fact that people just hate the Kardashians and everyone associated with them.
I’m finding it ridiculously unfair that so many people here are accusing Caitlyn of trivializing the trans movement, and even more so accusing her of not doing enough for the community. Seriously? Because coming out to the entire world and participating in a Diane Sawyer interview that was incredibly educational wasn’t a great thing to do for the trans community? Educating people on gender identity confusion and forcing this topic into homes across America wasn’t a positive move to make? Standing up on a stage at the ESPY awards and asking people to learn acceptance isn’t a move being made for the trans community?
Why is everyone blaming Caitlyn for the way the media is handling her emergence into the world as a public figure? How is it Caitlyn’s fault if all she gets asked about is her appearance? As far as her mentioning it in her speech–isn’t Caitlyn’s appearance the elephant in the room? The fact that many people are still viewing her as a man dressing as a woman?
I see people often throw around the name Chaz Bono, and to that my response is this: Chaz didn’t have the extraordinary fame that Caitlyn did. Chaz wasn’t tied to the biggest reality TV show of all time. And if your intentions are pure and you genuinely want to see this movement prosper, do you really care who gets the message out there? Chaz is a happy person living his truth. Why do you care so much if he wasn’t the one who FINALLY drove the point home that gender identity confusion is REAL and transgenderism isn’t going anywhere or just a fad? The most important thing should be that the point is FINALLY being made, no matter who makes it.
People can say what they want, but just the simple fact that Caitlyn is out there showing the world that 6 months ago we knew her as Bruce and now we know her as Caitlyn may just serve as inspiration to plenty of young transgender kids out there who feel like they don’t know if there is hope that they can live their truth. You don’t have to like Bruce the bad dad, or Bruce the supposed famewhore, or Bruce the man who wanted to be a woman but married 3 women anyway, but to try to take away from what Caitlyn has done so far in just a few months to contribute to the trans community is ludicrous and hateful.
Thanks Bella. I’ll also add this: Caitlyn Jenner doesn’t have to be anything she doesn’t want to be – not a leader, not a spokesperson, not an example. Let her live. If all she wants to do is get her hair and nails done and shop for nice clothes, that’s her choice. If all she wants to do is mug for the camera, so what? There are a lot of other voices out there that you can listen to if you want to hear about LGBT causes and issues. Caitlyn Jenner doesn’t represent “the transgender community,” who are literally millions of people who all have different feelings, beliefs and ideas; she’s just one person of those millions.
Yet she and her publicists are milking this for every inch of coverage they can, including the notorious ESPY/Sawyer interview exchange. Jenner herself has set herself up as the spokesperson/representative of transgendered people, and she is doing more harm than good because she is so polarizing for reasons far beyond and aside from her transitioning.
But you make it sound like her motivations are 100% altruistic and that’s simply not the truth.
@Kitten – According to your opinion. I’m going based off of actions, you’re going based off your personal bias and opinion. This does not make it factual. I can actually say that yes, Caitlyn gave an interview that was extremely educational on the topic of gender identity confusion and transgenderism. Caitlyn actually went to talk to a group of trans youth. Caitlyn actually stood up at the ESPYs and gave a speech that called for tolerance and acceptance of the trans community.
The fact of the matter is that until Caitlyn came out, the words “gender identity confusion” and “transgenderism” didn’t mean a thing to millions of people who are now actively discussing this topic and being educated on it. I have elderly relatives who are now open to the fact that sometimes a person can be born a girl and feel like a boy. That is momentous. Caitlyn’s fame actually helped get the message out to a broader audience. Would you be more pleased if the movement progressed at a slower pace and young people continued to attempt suicide, all so that a less famous advocate can be the face of it? That is just unnecessarily picayune and really counterproductive.
Can you name anything that actually serves as solid proof that Caitlyn has ulterior motives? Why do you choose to focus on the negative when so much positive can come out of this? What do you personally care if Caitlyn is a famewhore if what she is saying and doing saves even one life?
@ Kitten
Well you don’t know that do you? your just assuming it. Caitlyn been out for what a couple of months and you guys expect her to have “change the world” in that short amount of time.
Like many of us point out yesterday when Chaz came out he was all over the media, talk shows, news paper, morning news shows, has his own reality show and was on “Dancing with the Stars” So because of that did it make Chaz’s journey any less altruistic.
Caitlyn enjoying being her true self right now and once everything settles down and she had some time then we will see what her true motives are.
Where did Bella say that? All she did was point out what Caitlyn HAS done for the transgender community. Which is a lot.
I agree that Caitlyn is not 100% altruistic, and that being herself is her career. But you know what? She has made a living off of her fame for nearly four decades. Why should she stop now? Why should she go into hiding now?
I hear a lot of talk here about how she’s not representing herself honestly, and I don’t think it’s just that people dislike her. I think it’s playing into one of the oldest and most dangerous tropes about trans women – that they are deceitful and dishonest about their being a woman.
She’s consistently used her platform to talk about the struggles of the transgender community as a larger whole, to talk about young trans people, to talk about the violence trans women of color face. Literally every opportunity she has had to talk about She’s never said “I am the hero of this movement! I am the one who will save all the transgender youth!” She is making money the same way she has since 1976, and while she’s doing it, she’s talking about people who are less privileged than her.
I think it’s fine if people talk shit about her as a father. Sounds like she’s the first to admit that she failed big there. But the way people are questioning her womanhood and accusing her of being shallow… well. I just don’t think it’s neutral and has nothing to do with the fact that she is trans. As much hate as she gets here, I have never seen anyone say “Kim Kardashian has a very shallow perception of what it is to be a woman”, because she was assigned female at birth. That’s the kind of comment purely reserved for transgender women, when you don’t want to believe that they’re really women.
@Bella, yes, it is the Kardashian connection. Perhaps what people are really having a problem with is the complete whitewashing of Caitlyn’s past, as if the entire history of Bruce’s actions, and the effects of those actions, cease to exist. Have his children forgiven him, or is that what fits into the current narrative they are promoting? It’s not for me to say, but this is the general feeling I am getting from the comments. There is inherent skepticism attached to that family, and it’s really no one’s fault but their own.
Would you agree that the automatic do-over button she has been afforded is hard for some to swallow, when most people aren’t afforded that luxury? Plus, there is immense pressure to simply accept something that for most is an entirely new concept. That takes time, and pushing usually causes resistance…that’s human nature…to question and sometimes rebel.
In any case, we are seeing real progress in a short time, and that’s a huge positive. I think if it we were talking about almost anyone else, there would be much less cynicism attached.
@chewbacca – kim is regularly called the epitome of shallow here. There is no discrimination in that respect. And perhaps the hesitation in accepting Caitlyn as a female, or a woman, is generational. It seems to me that the 2nd wave feminists, in particular, seem to have the most trouble with this. Everything they have been fighting for seems to be shifting under their feet, and their legacy is being challenged.
I learned a great quote here last week…to paraphrase:
Change doesn’t come from education, it comes from generation.
I never said she should go into hiding, I just think it’s incredibly disingenuous to make it sound like she’s doing volunteer work and not making money off of the 20/20 interview, the reality TV series, the upcoming book deal, the perfume line, the sock line, and whatever else she’s coming out with. This was all strategically-timed and carefully orchestrated to maximize the bank account. And of course, I agree with you that she has every right to make money the same way she always has. It is what it is.
“As much hate as she gets here, I have never seen anyone say Kim Kardashian has a very shallow perception of what it is to be a woman.”
People have absolutely called out Kim and every Kardashian sister numerous times for being shallow women. Maybe the difference is that her identity has always been as a woman, so it’s redundant to point out that fact. I just don’t agree that Caitlyn should somehow be protected from the same criticism we level at other women simply because she is a transgendered woman.
Mainly, I don’t understand why people have to be all in or all out when it comes to Caitlyn.
I have very mixed feelings about her, that’s all.
*shrugs*
EDIT:@Shannon1972-Thanks again for your comments. Hit the nail on the head.
ETA: I am in no way dismissing the 2nd wave feminists…their contributions are extremely important, and I don’t think we would have the freedom to debate even this issue without their fighting for that right. So much that they have accomplished is taken for granted now, because it has become embedded in our life. Think about how recent it is that the word “vagina” can be used openly, and not whispered like it is something to be ashamed of. This has happened within my lifetime, so I know how far we’ve come.
@Kitten: I never thought I would see the day when this issue would become so prominent, and so many other issues are attached to it, that perhaps some cannot grasp. Not through fault of their own, just in that our society has changed so drastically in the past 30 yrs. Reading about it in a history book just doesn’t have the same impact as living it…as it will be when future generations look back on the unveiling of Caitlyn.
And so it goes with feminism, sexual identity and gender politics, all fraught with emotion. We are defining what it means to be female all over again, and all we have learned from both experience, and science, is being challenged. I think it’s arrogant to demand that entire generations just set aside everything they have been taught, simply to be accommodating. It’s worthy of serious examination. The issue is just that important, and I think it demeans everyone if we ignore that.
@Shannon1972 – I completely agree that it should take time to get used to, and that is fine. What bothers me is that people are saying that Caitlyn Jenner hasn’t done enough or any good at all for the transgender community, when in reality, there are now generations of people talking about gender identity confusion, transgenderism, gender assignment at birth, and a plethora of other factors that are often a part of a transgender person’s reality. My sentiment is that whether Caitlyn is a famewhore or Bruce was a bad guy, what does it matter if this much needed conversation is finally being had? Maybe if we all had our say, Caitlyn wouldn’t have been our first choice, but if lives are saved, does it really matter?
You’re spot on that things take time to adjust to, and that is expected but once upon a time people were hostile toward gay people (many still are, but it used to be the standard) and up until recently they didn’t even have the same rights as heterosexual people. My hope is that Caitlyn getting her face out there, even if she DOES have ulterior motives, will lead to transgender people feeling like they too can walk around out in the open and just be themselves. I also hope it doesn’t take decades to get there and that our society can be more progressive than those that came before us. A 41% suicide rate is almost too awful to believe and I personally don’t care who makes a difference as long as one is made.
@Kitten – we’re clearly going to have to agree to disagree here, but Chaz Bono went around giving interviews and appeared on Dancing With the Stars and many other shows because he became a celebrity only after he underwent female-to-male gender trasition. Chaz also wrote a book. Does this at all trivialize his experience or him referring to himself as an LGBT advocate? I don’t personally think so.
@Bella…I agree with everything you just said, and if this has been your point all along, then perhaps it was just lost in the delivery. You’ve driven to the heart of the issue here, because what we are really debating is inclusion. Everyone wants to feel like they belong, so in that respect we can all empathize with the plight of those in the trans community. They don’t have a real home yet, and where they will finally land remains to be seen. The door might not be open just yet, but there are definite some windows cracked, and that is amazing progress.
I do believe that we will see change faster than we ever had before, and it’s because of the Internet. I’m generation X, which is currently the middle generation alive today – we have the “greatest generation” and the “baby boomers” who raised us, and we are raising “Generation Y” and “the millenials”. We are in an extraordinary spot, because I think we see both sides of the issue – we are old enough to remember a time when LBGT issues were not known to the general public, but young enough to see them become a national discussion. That puts us in the unique position of being able to empathize with both those who are dug in and those clamoring for change.
I’m mainly with OKitt on this one.
I think it’s fantastic that Caitlyn is making an impact – and I think it’s amazing that this means more transgender youth will see her being strong and seeing her make huge changes in their life. I’m always happy when a celebrity is able to actually make a positive impact on someone who’s struggling, in a way that’s more deep than “they showed me how I could really get some great volume in my hair”.
I also think there needs to be a balance – nobody wants to skim over the good Caitlyn’s done – but why should we gloss over the negative stuff? While she’s bringing more attention to a great thing – she’s still no saint. She’s kind of a shit parent. Her youngest daughter was dating a 24 year old when she was 16. Caitlyn should really start to focus on her kids – especially Kylie – and push them to be more than Kris’ product.
And unless she’s donating 100% of the proceeds to charity, or groups that are helping out with transgender issues, it’s not altruistic. It’s rare that anyone does anything COMPLETELY altruistically – there’s generally something in it for themselves. Yes, good things are coming out of it, but she’s getting a benefit from it too.
I just think people need to look at both sides of this. Yes, she’s bringing attention to a huge issue, but she’s not suddenly some kind of sainted person who should never be criticized.
Caitlyn is in completely in control of her exposure and social schedule. She’s filming a reality show for E! for pete’s sake! Bruce told Diane Sawyer that his show would be very different than KUWK. The latest pics I’ve seen show Caitlyn in different social situations that akin to the KUWK krap. Hopefully, the social stuff will be interwoven with her work to expose the cruel and often violent incidents that transgendered people live with on a daily basis and to promote the understanding and acceptance of transgender people.
Does Kit have proof that Caitlyn has an ulterior motive? Doesn’t she have her own show coming out soon?Well than, enough said.
I’m with Kit on this just because Bruce made that transition doesn’t take away from my and others opinions that he comes from a family of fame whores and he has become one himself. Let’s not pretend that Caitlyn was naive to the amount of attention and opportunities this change would bring her.
Why is it that people have to feel pressured to say wonderful things about her. This is the same person that contributed heavily to a woman’s death, participated in a reality show that was only given to them because of his step daughter’s porn tape. This is the same person who’s a bad father to his kids from his previous marriage as well as in his last marriage. I’m on board with believing this entire thing was orchestrated by PMK . She orchestrated the way their divorce was announced as well as Caitlyn going through her transformation. Do you really believe Kris didn’t know. I love how you guys come out swinging in trying to defend Caitlyn’s motives but she’s a fame whore who pulled the wool right over your eyes.
Kit nor me are speaking against her becoming the person she wants to be physically. I think it’s wonderful . My issue is the way she is milking this. But keep to your beliefs and opinions and I will keep to mine
@Shannon1972-You said everything so I didn’t have to and I thank you for that.
@Erinn-Exactly. As Lucrezia so astutely pointed out below, some are treating Caitlyn the same way any other woman in the public spotlight is treated. I don’t think that’s unfair just because she is part of a marginalized group.
I’m sorry but I just can’t get behind the incessant glorification, the expectation that Caitlyn Jenner should be viewed as some sort of deity. But then again, I don’t buy into the sinner/saint narrative for any celeb. People are just more complicated than that.
Thanks, V4Real.
Yup, I agree. I’m seeing a lot of people who aren’t misgendering Caitlyn with names or pronouns but are still questioning whether she’s a good enough woman.
Actually, I think that’s because we’re treating her just like every other woman.
Other CB articles from today:
– Miranda Lambert is an overly ambitious, baby-hating cheater
– Duchess Kate is like a consort from the 1500’s
– Selena Gomez was asked to rate her attractiveness & low-balled her answer
– Amy Schumar “I think people only want women to speak for so long”
– Charlize Theron invited Pres. Obama to a strip club (that title isn’t judgy, but a quick skim of the comments and you can see her called her gormless, boorish, dumb, and bitchy)
Great post, Bella.
I saw her give a motivation speech a few years ago before her transition and she is a fantastic public speaker. Im glad she is finally free to be herself.
The saddest part of the Caitlyn story is that she didn’t just fail parenting one child. She failed at parenting six biological children. That’s pathetic.
Yes, it’s pathetic, but she doesn’t have a time machine and can’t go back and fix it. So we’ll have to see what she does with her future. Her older kids (the first four) seem to think Cait is an improvement over Bruce, so there’s that.
But I do wish she could find a way to help her youngest, Kylie. The more I see of that kid, the more I worry about a tragic headline. I know Cait needed to do this and at her age I can see why waiting would be a problem, but the timing wasn’t the best for Kylie. She just seems so lost and abandoned. The Tyga thing seems doomed, and I doubt that she will be (or is) taking it well.
@Bella – as the Unofficial Mom to an unofficially adopted trans son, I would just like to say how much I heart you.
: )
I know I may get flack for my opinion but here goes. I have been side eying CJ for the last week and I believe CJ. Is confused. For someone who has just came out I was expecting to see joy on her face, look at her eyes. Almost every picture I see of CJ she has very sad eyes. IMO, something is not right with her. I noticed she is all over the place, going here there and everywhere. It’s as if she does not know what to do with herself. She is going to gay bars Ect.
I know some people want to forget she/he is a lousy father. All the older kids give her bad marks for being a father. The last two girls appears to be on their own especially Kylie. IMO, Kylie Jenner appears to be a lost child. I think CJ should focus more on her children than worrying what her voice sounds like. I’m watching her CJ dressing in tight leather pants going to bars and acting like she has not a care in the world. IMO, she needs to focus on her teenage daughter.
CJ also appears to be a very cold as a person. I will never forget him at the scene of that car accident, he was walking around like he was a passerby. I never saw any shock as I was expecting for someone who just caused someone to lose their life, I hope I’m wrong and she is trans for the right reason, not just to make money, jmo.
Oh FFS, there were whispers about Caitlyn for 30+ years, it was an open secret for a long time that Bruce had dressed in ladies clothes and taken hormones. Caitlyn is going to gay bars because she’s part of the LGBTQI community, there’s nothing strange about that. This is not for money. Why on earth would ANYONE choose this route to make money? Question whether or not the timing was fortuitous to make money but it’s ridiculous to suggest Caitlyn isn’t genuine in who she is.
Go… be yourself… just stop texting/talking on your phone while driving.
The only person Jenner cares about is Jenner. So much hurt already done and so much damage already complete. Once a d-bag, always a d-bag.