Jon Hamm & Jennifer Westfeldt officially split after 18 years together


This is unsurprising. Back in the halcyon days of July, there were already widespread rumors that Jon Hamm and Jennifer Westfeldt were done or close to being done. Hamm had gone into rehab earlier this year, then he promoted the final season of Mad Men all by himself, which was unusual because Westfeldt had, historically, rarely left his side when he was on a promotional tour. While the “rumors” of a split were later denied in July, it seems like Jennifer and Jon really were on the outs. And now they’re officially over.

Jon Hamm and Jennifer Westfeldt have ended their relationship, PEOPLE confirms exclusively.

“With great sadness, we have decided to separate, after 18 years of love and shared history,” the couple tells PEOPLE in a joint statement. “We will continue to be supportive of each other in every way possible moving forward.”

Having been plagued with split rumors for months, Hamm, 44, and Wesfeldt, 45, were last seen publicly together on July 22 in New York at the premiere after-party for Netflix’s Wet Hot American Summer: First Day of Camp, where they were “canoodling” with each other, according to reports.

Earlier this year, the Mad Men star completed rehab for alcohol abuse and credited Westfeldt for supporting him throughout his treatment. In April, the couple even released a statement denying reports they had broken up.

The two began dating in 1997 and starred together in the 2011 film Friends with Kids.

[From People]

I theorized months ago that Jennifer was probably fine with not being married, because after 18 years together, what’s the point? But I do wonder if Hamm is maybe going to spread some money her way. I mean, she was his common-law wife by most standards and if they had been married and were now getting a divorce, she would be due some alimony or some kind of financial support. As for the sheer fact of their split… well, I believed they were over months ago. I think they’ve been in serious trouble for about a year or more, and she stuck by him when he went to rehab, but they fell apart soon after. Hm.


Photos courtesy of WENN.

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110 Responses to “Jon Hamm & Jennifer Westfeldt officially split after 18 years together”

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  1. Vic says:

    I’ll never understand why women stay with cheaters 😞

    • Ysohawt1 says:

      When did he cheat?

      • joan says:

        You don’t ever read? There was constant gossip.

        One other point, when someone gets sober, sometimes the partner has trouble with it, if they’ve been in a co-dependent kind of arrangement.

        Because once he’s sober he doesn’t present the same problems to “fix.”

        Not accusing her of anything, but that’s a common pattern.

        Another dynamic could just be that the newly sober one seeks change in other areas of life too.

      • Ysohawt1 says:

        I only read about him and Mad Men cast, never heard of him with other women, except Jennifer , that’s why I was asking.

      • Mrs. Darcy says:

        Mostly blind and then not so blind items about him hooking up with randoms when he was getting his drunk on. Never any real kiss and tells that I know of though.

  2. Pinky says:

    He strikes me as someone who doesn’t handle anything well. So, we’ll see where he ends up after this.

  3. Serenity says:

    I wonder what were the reasons behind the break up. Was it him going to rehab for alcohol problems? Was it those reports of him being a complete dick during his frat boy days? …..sounds like he has some serious demons.

    • Zapp Brannigan says:

      That is where my thinking went also that she never knew about that hazing stuff and setting someone on fire. That would certainly change my view of someone and while I know everyone makes mistakes and can be a jackass growing up ( I certainly did and was) what he did was just vicious and the kind of cruel that I am not sure you can grow out of.

      Anyway best of luck to her for the future.
      I am predicting he has some 22 year old lurking in the woodwork somewhere.

      • I think so too–I think maybe that hazing stuff probably put in perspective some of the things that he’s done/said to/with her. It’s like tolerating/ignoring the fact that your boyfriend says racist jokes…….and then finding out that he was arrested for assaulting up a black person in college.

      • Serenity says:

        Yeah. I wrote him as being a dick during his frat boy days but that’s probably a huge understatement. His victim in that hazing ritual apparently fractured his spine and nearly lost a kidney (just Googled it now)

    • Ronda says:

      but why now then? in 18 years you really get to know someone. but it could have been that all of those things combined with also Mad Men ending that it was just too much at once.

    • Yoohoo says:

      He’s cheated on her since he hit it big with Madmen. He barely tried to hide it. I think she finally grew a backbone and left. It seemed like they were only still together because they’d always been together. She was too scared to leave and there’s no point in him leaving when he can do whatever he wants and come home to her.

      • anne says:

        I want to believe they had some kind of agreement with each other – an open relationship or something – and it isn’t that he’s just a jerk.

        I liked them as a couple. I don’t want to believe he treated her so badly. Damn you Jon Hamm.

    • Ysohawt1 says:

      I always wondered why she didn’t have a bigger career after the Film , Kissing Jessica Stein?
      That film made a impact and put her on good footing for other things, I just always wondered why her career as far as acting never took off? She is talented and a good writer also.

      This just reminds me of those cases where people date forever but something is probably not going well for years but they stay in it out of still some love for each other and habit, maybe?

      • chick b says:

        I always wanted Jennifer to get more recognition. She got some indie cred with KJS and I’m glad she still writes, but she’s intelligent and beautiful and I’d like to see her work more. I really liked her guest part on Grey’s Anatomy.

        I know Jennifer’s received some criticism regarding her face but I feel like she’s one of the Hollywood women who just can’t win. She’s a classic beauty who never worked that younger-than-her-age angle. Then her face is everywhere since she’s attached to Hamm and with that comes the pressure to erase every sign of a maturing face.

    • laura in LA says:

      Jon’s drinking problems were perhaps due to the shame over his horrible frat boy hazing incident, feelings then brought to the surface in his role as Don Draper? Maybe Jen didn’t know about it, but it was all too much to take when the truth finally came to light.

      It doesn’t matter how old or young or drunk or wounded he was then, his actions were and are seriously disturbing.

      Fortunately, I enjoyed the final season of MM anyway and his role in it, also think he deserves that Emmy. Yet if he wants it, he owes fans, and most especially his victim (!), some sort of public acknowledgement and apology.

      • Ysohawt1 says:

        Oh come on She knew about the frat boy thing already, She would not break up over a 20yr ago frat boy thing that she has probably known about for a DECADEs, just because the public just found out why do some assume this woman who has been with him for 18yrs didn’t know?

      • laura in LA says:

        Ysohawt1, hence the word “maybe”. That’s because I don’t know either one of them or what they think and feel. Seems like “maybe” you have some anger issues to address yourself there, hmm?

      • Charlotte15 says:

        @Laura in LA I agree with you. I was a MAJOR fan of his, but ever since reading what he did to that poor guy at college I can’t look at him the same way. That said, I do think he truly deserves the Emmy for his portrayal of Don. However I was very disappointed at how he stayed completely silent when the frat incident story came out; maybe he was somehow legally bound not to speak about it due to the terms of his plea bargain, but if not, I think it was crappy of him to not publicly apologize. His PR people/manager/lawyers probably advised him to ignore it and wait for the story to die out and eventually be forgotten, but I think that was a poor decision on his part and believe it lost him a LOT of fans.
        As far as whether Jennifer knew about the hazing before the general public did, it was public record so I am SURE she was aware of it. No matter what happened, I feel very sorry for her. It must have been rough having his fame skyrocket like that, and she is left with no legal protection since there is no common-law marriage in NY and I believe that’s where they were based for the most part. I personally think that she deserves better than him and hopefully she will find a man that will appreciate her and treat her like a queen. Jon seems beyond arrogant IRL.

  4. lucy2 says:

    That’s a shame, they were together a long time. With the rehab and everything it does sound like there were strains on their relationship though.

    • mom2two says:

      I agree. 18 years is a very long time. Sorry to hear that they have really split.

    • Pinky says:

      He probably went to rehab in a last-ditch effort to keep her. And it didn’t work.

    • Carol says:

      Yeah, but I’m sad about this couple splitting up. I thought they made a nice pair. Maybe Jon took up alcohol to not face the fact that his relationship was crumbling.

      • anne says:

        I’m sad about them, too. But, if the rumors of his rampant infidelity are true, it seems he did his share to tear it down.

  5. Tifygodess24 says:

    No surprise but I wonder how long it will take before we see him with some 20 year wanna be actress or model?

    • BengalCat2000 says:

      ^^^^Was thinking the same thing. He seems so damaged to me.

      • Sochan says:

        Don’t confuse him with his MM character. Aside from his parents divorcing and him mom dying when he was a kid he’s had a good life handed to him with numerous opportunities, good university, successful acting career, and a woman by his side for almost 2 decades. He’s not “damaged”; he’s a spoiled brat.

      • BengalCat2000 says:

        I have a lot of compassion for him after reading about the loss of his parents when he was so young. But there are no words for the hazing situation. I can’t wrap my head around it. I wonder where his career will go after all of this?

      • Tifygodess24 says:

        @sochan yes but this guy has also done some not so great things in his life as well. People can appear to have it all , or have it together and still be very damaged.

    • Bella bella says:

      There’s a blind item over at BlindGossip that intimates that he’s got 2 babes at the ready!

      • anne says:

        His reps are saying the breakup occurred because he wanted kids. That’s a great way to buffer the news of him becoming a father. . . .


  6. Jayna says:

    I would assume she leaves with quite a few million from him after 18 years together. She hasn’t done much for years, just here and there. She did that movie she wrote and acted in and directed and he produced for her and even acted in and it was a very average movie. I thought she was weak in the part. He’s wealthy and I think they would part amicably after all that time together and with her having a fair settlement. They were obviously very tight for years and she was his emotional support while he worked very long hours.

  7. Talie says:

    It’s all speculation because these two aren’t famous enough to warrant a lot of “and sources say” reporting. But I don’t think a woman stays with a man for 18 yrs who doesn’t want marriage and kids, if that’s what she desperately wants.

    I wouldn’t be surprised to him hook up and knock up a hot 25 yr old, but that would be more about him being a dumb man than having anything to do with hurting Jennifer.

  8. Size Does Matter says:

    These headlines surprised me because I thought they were officially over months ago.

  9. Rice says:

    She’s 45??? She’s looks fabulous!

  10. Esmom says:

    And…the summer of breakups doesn’t end with Labor Day. This seems pretty big to me, maybe because I was such a Mad Men fan. There was something “off” about them for a long time so I guess this isn’t all that surprising. What is more surprising to me is how well he seems to have kept his rehab/post-rehab life under wraps.

    • Jayna says:

      Breakups never just happen overnight. There is always something off about a couple for quite a while before the breakup actually becomes formal. It’s just most hide it behind closed doors. For longtime couples, that could be a few years of a relationship that isn’t doing well, but with so many years invested kind of drags on putting off the inevitable split.

  11. Sochan says:

    I theorize that she was co-dependent on him for a long time. She probably gave up only when he forced her into it.

  12. Mum says:

    His Hammaconda don’t want none unless ya got buns hon.

  13. Mispronounced Name Dropper says:

    It’s a pity so many of you claimed Hamm as your forever dong.

  14. Tracking says:

    I don’t know, I thought they seemed good together. It’s hard for any relationship to survive addiction though. Addicts are selfish and very hard to live with. Maybe things didn’t improve even once he got through rehab.

  15. launicaangelina says:

    Am I the only one who thinks Jon Hamm and Kristen Wiig have chemistry? I always thought they’d end up together.

  16. kri says:

    I can’t look at him the same way since that hazing stuff came out. I wonder of she will seek custody of The Hammaconda?

    • GoodNamesAllTaken says:

      That was my first thought…darling you made leave me, I won’t lose my mind, take your bullsh@t with you, but leave that @&$@ behind…
      I wrote that myself. In case you couldn’t tell.

    • lucy2 says:

      Yeah, I really liked him until I read all that, it was well beyond stupid youthful behavior. Between that and his alcohol issues, maybe she just couldn’t do it anymore.

  17. alice says:

    I can’t picture him on a serious relationship with a younger girl, he seems needy and needs a woman, not a girl, and he seems to be aware of that. I think he will have a string of 20 year old things and when he’ll be bored by them he will go after some divorced actress that already has children and money and likes messy men, someone like Jennifer Garner or Robin Wright.

    • FingerBinger says:

      It’s unlikely he’ll date a woman with kids. He’s certainly not dating Jennifer Garner a woman with small kids.

    • tracking says:

      I think so too. He’s always talked about relationships in a pretty grownup way, hard to see him with the super young ones beyond flings. One thing I liked about him was the fact that he had a partner who was long-term, age-appropriate, and accomplished in her own right, even if her insecurities seemed to come out in terms of aging and his sudden fame in the latter part of their time together.

    • Isabelle says:

      Actually see him with a woman his age as well, maybe older. He’ll keep the younger ones as side pieces.

  18. minx says:

    I wonder about her staying with him all these years…did she really not want marriage and kids, or did she stay with him thinking at some point they would get married? I can believe the no children part, but I wonder if she wanted some kind of permanent commitment.
    I was a huge fan of his until the hazing business, and now I can barely look at him.

    • Yoohoo says:

      She’s said in multiple interviews that she wanted to get married and have kids but it never seemed to happen.

      • Ysohawt1 says:

        Skje also said multiplum times she did NOT want marriage and kids,
        ( even made a movie about it. )

        If she wanted marriage and kids she would have them, she doesn’t need Jon for that. She can still have those things,

  19. Ysohawt1 says:

    Sone people don’t want marriage, some people don’t want kids , it happens.
    I have a friends who have been together 20 yrs. Neither wanted kids or marriage, she’s a doctor, hes a artist but they love their lives together and have never wanted kids or the ring.

    I wonder if these two , Jon&JenniferW. just out grow each other, or one partner out grew the other?

  20. Cannibell says:

    She’s a talented writer and a not terrible actress. I hope she finds peace and happiness after this.

    • anne says:

      This may be a rude question, but I wonder how people, like Jennifer, who have modest, irregular success in the entertainment industry make a living. Is she an independently wealthy woman who just indulges her own creative interests? I know Jon has been successful in recent years, but before he hit it big SHE was the successful one, right?

  21. Lurker says:

    My money says he’s married with a baby in 3 years.

    • Jen43 says:

      That was where my thoughts first went, also. He’ll get some starlet/model pregnant and marry her.

      OTOH, I wonder if the pregnancy part has already happened. It seems odd to me that a not-too famous, unmarried couple need to make a statement. Does anyone else find that strange?

      • Andrea says:

        I would not think kindly of her if this does occur given his past frat boy behaviors. It is enough for me to run screaming in the opposite direction.

    • Isabelle says:

      He seems very anti-kid, married maybe.

  22. Jess says:

    I’m not surprised but definitely sad for them, they seemed like a sweet couple. I really dont want to see him single, if he’s truly a cheating frat boy that won’t be pretty, and I worry about his sobriety now, I think she held him somewhat together. I don’t think she wanted to get married or have children, just a vibe I always got from her but I could be wrong, but I’d still hate to see him knock up some random young starlet and get married in a year, and you know the women will be after him now! If not for his money then the hammaconda!

  23. Crumpet says:

    My bet is that it was the his hazing history that put a cap on that relationship.

    • FingerBinger says:

      After 18 years you don’t think she knew about that? She broke up with him for something he did in college?

      • Jayna says:

        I know. I don’t get how somehow even comes to that. They lived together 18 years, are in their late 40s. What broke them up had to do with their relationship and problems.

      • Crumpet says:

        No, I’m willing to bet she knew nothing about it. Why would Hamm disclose it to her? Especially as bad as it was. Or if he did tell her, he may have whitewashed it quite a bit. His version would be quite different from the version of the victim, in any case.

  24. Luca76 says:

    I doubt it had anything to do with the hazing stuff. I think anyone could have predicted this breakup even before that came out and there were plenty of stories out there about them being rocky. I wonder if he got help for drinking in order to save his relationship and if it was too late to salvage it? Or if him being sober just changed the dynamic too much and broke them up (that’s fairly common). Anyway I like her, and I hope she moves onto a healthier and more equal situation. I also hope he gets his head on straight and that he stays sober.

  25. Andrea says:

    18 years is a looong time celebrity or not. Most of my friends haven’t lasted that long together and they aren’t famous. I have two friends who are lesbians who had been together longer than my hetero friends (13 years) and they just broke up too. 🙁 It is so sad when it has been over a decade. To be honest, I’ve been with my bf 8 1/2 years and have been debating pulling the plug for the past 6 months. This was not a sudden decision on their part I don’t think, but a long time coming.

    As for what others said above about the hazing, I cannot find him attractive after reading that. I wonder how he is in a bar or out in public etc because that is some sadistic behavior you don’t just “grow out” of.

  26. kibbles says:

    I agree with a comment I read earlier today that 18 years of dating says two things. The sex was good and something was wrong and at least one of them always felt uncomfortable getting married.

    Yeah, I know, some people are okay with never getting married or having kids. Not disputing that. But I wrote in the July post about these two that I didn’t get an anti-marriage/children vibe from Westfeldt. I truly believe that at some point she wanted either one or both of those things and Hamm wasn’t ready. Westfeldt was so in love with Hamm that she decided she could be happy just having him until she wasn’t happy anymore.

    Maybe she left because of those desires that he was unwilling to fulfil or because of a combination of issues such as his alcoholism, rumors of cheating, and other problems such as his violent frat days. All of those issues seemed to have been suppressed and hidden from the public until the end of Mad Men. Who knows what demons from Hamm that Westfeldt has had to deal with in private for all of these years. It makes me feel even more sorry for her.

    I also feel bad for her because she really messed up her face. I don’t know if it is botched plastic surgery or too much Botox and/or fillers, but I feel like she is a woman screaming for a man who will give her more love and self-confidence. I always wondered whether her botched face bothered Hamm.

    • Sochan says:

      I imagine it’s SO HARD to leave a relationship after being settled down so long. I bet that’s one of the huge things that slows breakups and divorces down by months or even years but never gets cited in a discussion about “why they stayed together so long while not happy”. It has to be hard to bust up your comfort zone. Bust up your home, your possessions, your children or pets, your regularity, being able to come home to the same person — even if there’s unhappiness — being able to be relaxed around a person who has come to know you inside and out. I just think folks are really slow to give up the comfort and the stability.

  27. Gina says:

    Well, it was obvious. When I first saw her interview I was like “really, Jon? this woman? puffy face,awful movies?”
    He’ll definitely marry and have kid in nearest future. I hope he hooks up with Charlize Theron, that would be soooo hot. Better match for him

    • Toniko says:

      She was sooo lusting on him on that Graham Norton show. :))

    • Ysohawt1 says:

      Oh yes, I saw that. Chàrlize was totally digginh him. It was so funny to see her crushing on him.

    • Tara says:

      They would be a throwback to an old Hollywood couple. Tall, dark, and handsome man with classically beautiful blonde.

    • Ladytron2000 says:

      Obviously, he sobered up, took one look at her bloated, distorted face (WTF did she do to herself?!?!?) & hit the road.

      Yes, Charlize may be hot, but Charlize is… how do doctors put it? Oh yeah, batshit crazy.

    • kibbles says:

      Yeah, I think Charlize would be a good choice. She is still naturally beautiful, age appropriate for Hamm, independent, and probably isn’t interested in having biological children. That would be perfect for Hamm.

  28. Joanie says:

    He’ll be married with a baby within two years.

    • Ysohawt1 says:

      Or maybe not

      Or maybe she will

      Marriage and babies aren’t the be all , end all for everyone, …just saying.

    • Jayna says:

      I doubt it. He wasn’t married to Jennifer and they had no kids. There was nothing holding him to her all those years except he wanted to be with her. He doesn’t seem the type to fall for some 20-something with babies on the brain and have a midlife crisis and get her pregnant. I think he will be with a strong woman. And if he does have a child it will only be because he’s mentally in a place and timewise in a place that changes his mind.

  29. Nev says:

    I think SHE will meet someone more healthy and suitable and be married within two years or sooner.

    • Jayna says:

      Maybe she already has someone and why they are broken up. He tried to get clean to win her back but she was interested elsewhere and too late.

      People are assuming he dumped her.

    • Gina says:

      Statistics say otherwise. And not just because she’s a woman, but because after 18 years habit kicks in and she will sabotage every relationship until she finds someone EXACTLY like him. If she finds…

  30. Patty says:

    I think both of them were ambivalent about each other. Jennifer on separate occasions talked about wanting kids / marriage and then would say she didn’t want those things. I don’t remember if Hamm ever really got into the subject. I wouldn’t be surprised if both of them ended up married to other people within a few years, but especially him. It almost always happens like that with men; they can date someone for years and years and then be married to someone they’ve known for six months. Especially someone like Hamm who seems needy. I do think both will end up with age appropriate partners so to speak.

    Being together with someone for 20 years is no small feat. I’m sure they probably did their best to make it work, but at some point either one or both them decided it was time to move on.

  31. Andrea says:

    Did anyone see her in Kissing Jessica Stein? Cute little indie movie.

    • Ysohawt1 says:

      Yes, it put her on the map in a way, but it made an impact, I always wondered why she didn’t get much film work after that?

  32. Tara says:

    That is sad because they were together so long. He had to go to rehab recently, so it’s clear there were issues.

    • Sochan says:

      I bet the rehab was her ultimatum and then after the passing of a few months it was clear it wasn’t working. Doesn’t mean he is drinking again. Alcoholics are hell to live with on more accounts than just the drinking. They need a lot of emotional and psychological therapy even if they can quite the booze. They often need counseling and repairing of memories as well as they tend to have so much intense emotional baggage attached to childhood or some traumatic event they can’t let go of.

  33. LonnieTinks says:

    I’m willing to bet that he gets married to some young thing within the next year or two.

  34. meme says:

    Big deal. Susan Sarandon and tim Robbins broke up after many many years and they have kids. In Hollywood, 18 years is forever.

    • Jayna says:

      In suburbia 18 years is forever these days. Most are now on to their second marriage before then. LOL

      • Andrea says:

        I have a friend 50 thinking of divorcing husband #3. I don’t know anyone besides my parents past 10 years honestly and I am 34.

  35. Amanda G says:

    So how long are we giving him until he steps out publicly with a 20-something model and has a marriage certificate and kid with her within a year?

    • Jayna says:

      I don’t see him with a 20-something model ever. I don’t see him married within a year. And I definitely don’t see a kid within a year.

      • Amanda G says:

        I was joking, but I think you’re giving him too much credit. We will see who is right!

      • Jayna says:

        Amanda G, you’re right. Sometimes I do give men too much credit. LOL How about, he would bang the 20-something model for fun behind the scenes, but then have a more age appropriate girlfriend for public unveiling once he settled back down, like a smart and beautiful woman, someone like Charlize Theron that was mentioned earlier.

  36. Rubber Ducky says:

    Good. Now she’s free of that creep she can go back to writing and making movies. I love her work.