Ryan Lochte is, to me, a big, dumb, harmless puppy. The puppy has no malice. The puppy doesn’t want anyone to have a bad time. The puppy doesn’t mean to piddle on the carpet, but Lochte just got super-excited to see you. And since we’re just days away from the Rio Olympics’ opening ceremony, we’re in for another season of JEAH (Lochte’s brotastic “catch-phrase”).
To celebrate his fourth time at the Summer Olympics, Lochte decided to do something fun: he dyed his naturally brown hair a completely unnatural shade of ice blue. He posted the progress on his social media (you can see his Twitter here). I’m not sure if he was aiming for blue? He captioned the final result: “New look…. Here We Go #Rio #2016 thanks @jennjonesatl #turnup #lightblue,” so maybe he did want to look silver-blue. He sort of looks like a frat-version of Anderson Cooper now, right? And I sort of don’t hate it. Lochte is one of the oldest swimmers on Team USA this time around (he’s 32 years old on Wednesday), and it feels like he’s “leaning in” to being Team USA’s older guy. Nah, bruh. JK. So what do you think? Would you hit it?
Also, this is the funniest thing that has happened so far in the lead up the Rio Olympics – DeMar DeRozan Instagrammed Team USA’s basketball team doing a sing-a-long on a plane to an exposition game. The men were singing Vanessa Carlton’s “A Thousand Miles,” which is simply charming on it’s own, but when you add in Carmelo Anthony’s “not amused” face at the end, the whole thing is just EPIC.
Photos courtesy of Ryan Lochte’s Twitter.
Carmelos face 😂 I’m dying
I know, hilarious. Makes me wonder if he was having a bad day or if he doesn’t get along with the guys.
I think it’s both, plus the age difference! Melo is friends with lebron, Chris Paul, Kobe, Wade… Not these kids. I don’t even understand why he’s going to the Olympics this year, he should have let the little boys go, he already has a gold medal and Brazil isn’t safe
Yeah, makes sense. Wonder why he’s going, too.
Maybe he didn’t like the song choice. That song is kind of irritating…
Ha! Bump Lochte. The Rio video made my day!
I actually like the hair a lot.. But no to “hitting it”. I don’t find him attractive. More because of his personality
I like it too, especially in the second pic – makes him look a bit less “frat boy” maybe? I doubt that I’d actually hit it, because as soon as he’d open his mouth I’d dry up like a desert during a windstorm.
If he manages to keep a full head of hair – I think he’s going to look better as an older man, honestly. I like the hair too, weirdly enough.
I Would But I’d be so embarrassed Id Leave with a hoodie on in the cover of night, then I wont tell my gfs or count it towards my “numbers” To Be sure Id Hand him his ass Right Back to him like we’re tussling… but I’d Never ever tell a soul, i’d ghost right after too
OMG HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA QQ!
QQ 😂😂 you made me laugh hard!!!!
ha ha ha ha ah
And he’d have to stay completely quiet. Absolutely no talking.
Lol, pretty much, QQ. 😆
Oh come on. You’d at least have to tell your friends! 🙂
No, i’d be truly and well mortified, they’ll clown me about it til my dying day, they already do that behind a NUMBER of things Schtupping this Blue Steel giving beautiful though incredibly simple ding-dong would be the ULTIMATE, even if he was good in the sack I wouldn’t, I wouldnt even allow me to have that inner voice internal convo NO
Yes I would hit it. If he didn’t speak at all I could do it.
You took the words RIGHT out of my mouth. The hair is definitely an improvement but he’s still a frat boy type dope!
LOL! I’m with you here.
+1000
Faster than I’d ever hit Phelps, that’s for sure.
I don’t know that much about his personality, so yeah. I’d hit that with an open palm and tell it to say my name.
Internet is closed for the day. Thanks, Highland.
He’s a nice looking kid, but dumb as a bag of hammers, so no.
Nope. The only name on my big dumb puppy list is Gronk
That video was so cute. I love Olympics time. I get strangely patriotic (living in France currently).
As far as Lochte, the hair doesn’t look as bad as you would think. And as someone who is currently dating a Lochte (dopey, but lovable puppy), I could probably come around to hitting it. I always preferred super intelligent men but dating, for the first time, a guy who isn’t all that smart (and a pompier to boot), there’s something nice about having a guy who is just nice and sweet. Even if he doesn’t read :/
That video of TMZ will never get old for me. I keep playing it over and over. I wonder what Vanessa Carlton thinks?
I would hit it. I mean atleast he knows he is dumb and isnt precious about it. I loved his 30 Rock dumb bimbo guest appearance.
Am I the only one who thinks this looks like an homage to the true silver fox, Anderson Cooper? I find Lochte so repellent personality-wise that I would hit Anderson first, and he’s gay.
I see a combo of Dan Abrams/Anderson Cooper.
All hail the silver fox! I don’t hate it actually. Still wouldn’t hit it, even with a Lethal Weapon-style full body condom.
At first glance I thought it was Greg Louganis. Random.
Ugh, to that term “hit it.”
The silver hair looks great.
Jeah, NO. Although I do like the hair. My teen boys are swimmers and they love to break out the bleach before their big meets, it’s cute. Cuter then when they shave all it off for the even bigger meets.
“jeah no” LOL
Wouldn’t hit it, but would totally hit Nathan Adrian!
Did y’all see the YouTube clip of when Lochte was on a Philadelphia morning show to promote his reality show? There are many good quotables from that segment, but the best part is that one of the anchors completely lost it on camera laughing at his harmless dopey brand of clueless. I highly recommend it.
I remember watching that on repeat I was laughing so hard.
I just went and watched it again… Still as funny! I YouTubed Ryan Lochte and it prompted ‘interview news anchors laughing’.
The version with the full interview is the best- the anchors are really snarky with their questions too.
‘If you are a man at night you gotta be a man in the morning’…
No, Ryan is the ultimate douche lol. Hes not worth it. Great bod tho. Love the guys singing then the pan to Carmelo. HAHAHAHAHA. He’s not feeling it and i love it.
Bless his heart.
Would I hit it? Jeah.
But I wouldn’t look myself in the eye after.
I would hit it all day, every day. Gronk too. I wouldn’t worry about carrying on an intelligent conversation with them, they are just pretty to look at IMO. I read a bunch of posts on FB about how silly he was for dying his hair, but at least he isn’t doing anything illegal, or doing anything to make the USA shake their head in shame.
Would I hit that?
Maybe, but only as a 2 a.m. booty call and sneak off under cover of night. And only if it didn’t become public.
He’s a man with ice blue hair at night and a man with ice blue hair in the morning.
Y’all better hit it before he sets a toe in that nasty water!!
Yeah but will it turn green once it hits the chlorine?
“I’m a poet and didn’t even know it.”
He’s not the brightest bulb, but Lochte is pretty harmless and well meaning.
Would I hit it? Fist or open palm?
As long as his mouth was duct taped and he called his own cab afterwards, sure, I’d go for it.