Much like my strange affection for Jessica Alba these days, I’ve come around on Kate Hudson. I even half-admire her for living her life unapologetically. She takes lovers and casually dates boy-toys, she started her own athletic-wear company and she’s getting into the lifestyle business too. Now, do I want to buy anything from her? Not really. But I appreciate that she’s not stuck in a rut and she’s trying out different things. Kate covers the new issue of Marie Claire, the October issue, and she chats about a lot of different things. My favorite part is what she has to say about Hillary Clinton, likability and adversity.
The importance of quiet: “I love locking myself in rooms and just being quiet. A lot of people have a hard time in that space, because when you’re quiet, you feel the uncomfortable things. You have to actually look at things in your life that are functioning or not functioning. And I like that place.”
On the end of relationships: “I think forgiveness is the biggest part of it…I think everybody wants to point fingers. If you are a person who takes responsibility for yourself and your part in it, you have a much better chance of maintaining a nice relationship. It also means that you grow up. A lot of people don’t want to grow up because it sucks.”
On being a working single mother: “I don’t try to sugarcoat things. I’ll say, ‘I’m doing the best I can.’ I like cooking, I like presenting. I like it to be an experience and [my kids] help me with it, but if they want something after that, I’ll be like, ‘Look, I’m placing a meal out for you like a king. I can’t do everything. I’m going to have to be the OK mom.’”
On Hillary Clinton and the upcoming election: “There’s so much focus on her likability. I want to elect a president to get the job done. When she took the stage, I got incredibly emotional. As a woman, and as a working mom trying to get things done, you find yourself meeting adversity a lot, but you never talk about it because you don’t want to bring attention to it. You don’t want to go there.”
On her relationships: “The reason I don’t talk about anything like that is because I have kids. People ask that question as if, ‘Oh yeah, it’s really healthy to publicly talk about who I am or am not dating when I’ve got a tween.’ [Ryder] can read, and he can hear. I’m not going to indulge in that kind of thing until there’s someone in my life who I am introducing to my kids.”
On the backlash against actresses being lifestyle entrepreneurs: “If you don’t want to get criticized, do nothing. I would love to be able to pass on to the next generation the need to stop judging everybody so much. You don’t have to like it. You don’t have to buy it.”
I genuinely like what Kate says about Hillary Clinton and “likability.” Kate isn’t giving us some massive thesis on Why The World Is The Worst For Women, she’s simply acknowledging what it’s like to be a woman in this world and watching another woman make history. There was so much of that during the Democratic National Convention, although by the time Hillary took the stage, I was more focused on her, the candidate, then the history being made.
I also enjoy this: “Look, I’m placing a meal out for you like a king. I can’t do everything. I’m going to have to be the OK mom.” So many Hollywood moms and the Judgy Motherhood Complex have a problem with that, or so it seems from the outside looking in on all of that stuff. The “modern” idea is that moms are supposed to be and do everything for their kids. And that’s just not realistic, nor is it healthy, in my opinion. Like, it’s not the end of the world for a mom to be tired and for dad to go pick up a pizza. But the Judgy Motherhood Complex judges you for it.
Photos courtesy of TESH/Marie Claire.
There are some genuine issues to have with Clinton. But what bothers me–and I think what makes me defend her more, especially with my age group–is the people that dislike her because they “think” they’re supposed. I just hear people repeating talking points (or sharing memes) that have nothing to do with policy and legislation or her record.
It’s been almost a four decade smear campaign against her. It’s also hard for people to admit they’re not thinking as critically or independently as they think.
Yeah, people really have been programmed to dislike her and most cannot articulate any solid why. It really has been a brilliant smear campaign. The “likeability” factor is just another drummed-up attempt to discredit her.
I’m not a fan of Kate’s but she’s right — we need a POTUS who can do the job.
I genuinely like what she said about HC too. A lot of successful women are resonating with HC’s struggles and I think that is great.
However I think she gives herself far too much credit for enjoying solitude and having the ability to self-reflect. Just sounds like she’s patting herself on the back too much. Does she really know that others “have a hard time in that space”? I think everyone likes peace and quiet. And how much difficult self-reflection are you engaging in if you then go and brag about it in a published interview. LEtting go of results is key to a thing like that
I know people who will go to any length to not be alone with their thoughts and feelings. From staying busy, distracted by TV or reading, to staying buzzed on something, they absolutely cannot be “in that space”, where it’s just them and a reflection time on their life, their choices, their intentions.
Hmmmm. Interesting. Thanks for the perspective. Been a while since I knew anyone like that, but yes now that I think about it….
Maybe it’s cultural to some degree. Including, regional culture– #LAPeopleProblems
I agree. There’s true reflection which often times requires change and there’s thinking about your day and your screw ups and making excuses so you can continue same screw ups. I don’t see Kate being a true reflectionist or she wouldn’t be acting like a teeny bopper with boys half her age. I’d say most people do reflect whether they realize it or not or see it for what it is, usually at night. Don’t we all lay awake in bed before we fall asleep and ponder our lives, actions, etc.?
She’s reminding me of Goop who seems to think she’s such an enlightened soul and an intellectual. Pffft…
Okay, nicely done Kate. I totally agree – I’m not throwing my back out on a daily basis for my children to feel like royalty. You get decently prepared food, a clean enough house, clothes that fit and special stuff sometimes, plus parents who love you and keep your life as stable as possible. That’s a gift. As is not believing one’s self to be the center of the universe.
Attitude of gratitude is our motto. Don’t want to eat broccoli??! Be grateful you even have the choice to NOT eat. Others should be so lucky!!
Amen on the likability comment. I don’t need the POTUS to feel like my bestie.
Exactly. I want someone who’s qualified and has a track record of getting results in difficult circumstances, someone who leads change. Hillary is all those things and more.
I was never really a KH fan, but for whatever reason, I’m liking her in the joint appearances she’s done with Kurt Russell for their film. The mutual affection is palpable. Nice.
She’s not wrong. If you asked people what qualities they expect from a MALE presidential candidate I doubt many people would list “nice”. Yet for Hillary, it seems like in some cases her not being as pleasant as people would like is a good enough reason not to vote for her…
More of the patriarchal view – that women are to be pleasing, not questioning, just blindly trying to please. Heaven forbid a woman be mentally strong and her own person. It’s called integrity, but a lot of men would call it ‘fiesty’ because she’s female.
I have tinnitus in my right ear, so when things are quiet, I hear the white noise in my ear, so I always have to have low noise in the background.
I get what she says re: likability and women, tbh.
…some great photography there….
She’s really growing on me. I love that she acknowledges the challenges of having kids that are aware of things while she’s trying to be a mom, work, have a personal life, etc. I think that would be really hard. I don’t judge her for banging cute young guys so long as she isn’t confusing her kids with a new male figure in their lives every month.
And HELL YES to her HRC comments. Sexism is most definitely alive and kicking in this country
There is a guy version of likeability. I remember in Bush/Obama election years there was this discussion that a president should be someone you can relate to, have a beer with.
I think Americans focus very much on likeability and image of their politicians, male or female.
There is always talk about who looks presidential and who doesn’t etc.
I agree with her on responsibility in a relationship. I also think someone like Gwen Stefani should take an advice from Kate’s book on not talking about her relationships with men and expecially the father of her childeren publicaly as kids tend to grow up and tend to learn to read. I rolled my eyes a bit at the silence bit. I often think that people sat that to appear more spiritual or inteligent when really, girlfriend has two kids of course she wants silence. Any of us in this mad world (especially the ones of us with kids) long for silence and a moment of reflection.
I like what she says here. You can see Goldie Hawn raised her well.