Jesus Luz’s dad confirms Kabbalah commitment ceremony with Madonna

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What would you do if your 22 year-old son was going to marry a 50 year-old woman, even if it was just symbolic? Would you jump for joy because the bitch is rich and famous, or would you worry that your young son is being taken advantage of?

Jesus Luz’s dad supposedly confirmed to a Brazilian magazine that his son is set to wed Madonna in a non-legally binding Kabbalah commitment ceremony. He sounds nonplussed about the whole thing, saying that it’s some kind of ritual but he doesn’t know if it’s like a real marriage at all. That should be a relief, although it reduces Jesus’ chances of cashing in. Jesus’ dad also says it’s not true that his son is taking English lessons because he already speaks English well, thank you very much. He does sort-of confirm what Kaiser said earlier this week – that Jesus is a glorified baby sitter:

In a recent interview with Brazil’s Quem (Who) magazine, Luis Heitor Pinto da Luz says: “The kabbalah ceremony [in New York that] will link up my son Jesus Luz and Madonna only confirms that he is extremely happy.”

But although the pair is planning a ceremony, the younger Luz most likely won’t be signing a prenup anytime soon: The wedding won’t be legally binding. “I don’t know if there will, in fact, be a real marriage between Madonna and my son. It will be a type of ritual, but I do not know kabbalah [or if the ceremony] will have legal validity,” says Luis, who doesn’t seem upset that his evangelically raised son, a model, is converting to the branch of Judaism.

In the interview, the elder Luz continues to spill the beans on his son’s relationship, saying Madge and Jesus live together in her Central Park West apartment. He also denies rumors that Madonna is shelling out big bucks to teach her Brazilian stallion to speak proper English. “[Jesus] already spoke English very well before he knew Madonna!” he says indignantly, explaining: “He has an aunt residing in the United States.”
The young stud has also been playing surrogate manny to Madge’s kids, says papa Luz. “She has small children, and Jesus helps her out with various tasks involving all of them. He plays ball with the kids. Jesus has charisma and loves children.”

Whatever the nature of their post-ceremony relationship, Jesus’ dad heartily approves of his son’s choice in women.

“I’ve spoken by phone with Madonna – in French, because my English is not fluent – and she appears to me to be a normal and polite person,” he says. “She is feminine. I don’t feel she is a harsh person.”
We hate to inform you of the facts, Mr. Luz: Madonna may be a lot of things, but feminine she ain’t!

[From The NY Daily News]

Maybe that’s why Madonna fired Davie’s nanny – she had enough help from her live-in boy toy. Also, this is the first I’ve heard that Madonna can speak French and that’s kind of surprising to me.

I guess it’s true then and Madonna and Jesus are going to have some type of “we’re together as long as it’s convenient for both of us” religious ritual. She’s not a stupid woman, and she’s not about to put her vast fortune at risk for some young stud. She’s also going to ensure that he sticks around for as long as possible and having him declared her Kabbalah life partner or whatever should help achieve that. Good for her I guess, but I still can’t help but cringe at the thought of the two of them together.

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25 Responses to “Jesus Luz’s dad confirms Kabbalah commitment ceremony with Madonna”

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  1. SixxKitty says:

    She is always so fast and over the top, age and time have taught her nothing.

  2. Wench says:

    Holy cow. Right, so…
    Divorce from the husband – check.
    Dressing like a teenager – check.
    Dating someone decades younger – check.

    So, due to this mid-life crisis, we’ve got buying a sports car and a tattoo yet to go through.

  3. josie says:

    This is not true!!

  4. Wif says:

    I can’t wait for the next 5 years, or whatever, until Lourdes is old enough to have an affair with one of her mom’s boy toys. That will be gossip heaven!!!

  5. eternalcanadian says:

    lolz @ the fact no matter what madonna does she still gets those narsty underarm sweat pits. 😛

  6. naynay says:

    this young man can barely speak English — guess he understands $$ when he sees it — the universal language.

  7. trollydolly says:

    Who cares? If she’s happy what’s so wrong with it? Men hook up with younger women all the time so why the horror when Madonna does it? I hope they’re both enjoying themselves immensely.

  8. Tess says:

    Oy Vey.

    Not only massive pit stains—but what’s that thing nesting on her head?

  9. KDRockstar says:

    I’m with Wif… it will be hysterical when Lourdes screws with one of her mom’s boy toys. She’ll probably end up a designer who never speaks to Madonna again.

  10. Annie says:

    I get grossed out when old men date younger women too.

    There’s no double standard here.

    And frankly, Jesus is MY age and Madonna is OLDER THAN MY MOTHER.

  11. lb says:

    yea, it would be hilarious if Lourdes trumps her mom in the shock value department! That would surely keep madge in print.

  12. Victoria says:

    No one dares tell Madonna she is 50 years old and looks like a fool. What is she thinking? That the public will believe a 22 year old lover means she’s 22 also?

    Madonna, go away!

  13. C-DUB says:

    She may be old but if I EVER meet Madonna I’m still giving her a high five, front-nuckle luv, or something because Jesus if FINE! Don’t hate the player! Real talk.

  14. waldemar says:

    That Madonna speaks French is new for me. I know her children (Lourdes and Rocco, no doubt David will learn to)speak French perfect and that Madonna couldn’t understand their conversations when they were smaller.

  15. Kitten says:

    ummm… Madonna CANT speak French… she had to ask her daughter how to say “tell me your secret” in French for that Confessions Tour… it was on the dvd lol

  16. Carly says:

    So, let me get this straight. Madonna dumps Jesus to appear more respectable in order to adopt Mercy. Then, when she’s denied Mercy, she gets back together with Jesus. Now, they are having a religious committment ceremony? So, I guess adopting Mercy is out? She is all kinds of screwed up. She just flip-flops from one thing to another. It’s like she has no core values and changes with the wind. Whatever gets her more attention, I guess. She is the epitome of everything I despise in people.

  17. Ally says:

    The guy’s willingness to ‘convert’ after such a short acquaintance suggests he’s in it for the big payoff. Good for him. She’s clearly objectifying him; he can return the favor.

    Wif: Yeah, I just hope it doesn’t turn into a Lana Turner type situation…

  18. ChristinaT says:

    he’s looking finer and finer every day… she did wonders for him in the looks department…

  19. jenny says:

    leave her alone –GO for it Madonna – when I’m 50 I’d love to look like that! and to have a hot boyfriend would be icing on the cake!!

  20. ms. b says:

    They are both beautiful! BTW, Madonna speaks Spanish too!

  21. Ophelia says:

    I think she should just compromise and adopt Jesus.

  22. becca says:

    Ugh. Personally, I find Kabbalah to be a load of crap. And I’m Jewish, B’mitzvahed and everything.

    I seriously can’t stand Madonna. She needs to disappear.

  23. Chicoulina says:

    I don’t understand why celebrities don’t botox there armpits?That’s what botox was invented for in the first place.It lasts 3-4 months.You don’t sweat at all.I haven’t tried it,but I have read alot about it.

  24. Katharine Jaynes says:

    I’m not bothered by their age gap, but I’m with everyone who thinks Jesus and Lourdes are going to get together. This situation is a loaded gun. Madonna’s look-a-like daughter is reaching puberty, and Madonna has brought a virtual stranger into her home. Seriously how long has she known him? What if he were to make an inappropriate pass at Lourdes?

    As a parent, if I were single I would be very hesitant as to who I would allow around my children. Madonna just met a strange Brazilian man, packed his bags and move him in. Good Luck

  25. paranel says:

    This “it” face bitch has gone crazy. She actually looks like his grandma. Even older than his mother and ugly at that too.