Emperor Baby Fists allegedly wrote his own inaugural address, #bigly #SAD

wenn30724834

I’m still sort of numb to the reality that in two days, Emperor Baby Fists will take the oath of office and be installed indefinitely into the White House. Will this all end in scandal, impeachment and treason charges? Or are these merely the first days of our American Brave New World? My big plans for Friday are to work and then go to the gym. I’ll probably watch some of the inauguration stuff on TV at the gym but other than that… I’m hoping that this is NOT a bigly television event. Emperor Baby Fists is historically unpopular for an incoming president – when Pres. Obama was inaugurated in 2009, his approval rates were hovering around 70%. Baby Fists’ approval rate at this moment? 44%, with 52% disapproving. He is the most unpopular incoming president in decades.

So can we expect Emperor Baby Fists to strike a conciliatory, healing tone in his inaugural address? Can we expect him to reflect on history, or acknowledge the weight on his shoulders as he tries to lead a divided nation? Yeah, probably not. According to sources, Trump has written the bulk of his inaugural address himself.

President-elect Trump has written his inauguration address draft himself, two senior Trump transition officials told CNN Tuesday. Last month, Trump told guests at his Mar-a-Lago estate in Florida, as well as presidential historian Douglas Brinkley, that he planned to write the speech himself, but we’ve now been told that Trump has actually followed through.

The decision is a departure from how Trump tackled speeches during the campaign, when he either delivered off-the-cuff remarks or relied on text prepared by his senior policy adviser, Stephen Miller. It’s unclear exactly to what extent Miller has been involved in fine-tuning Trump’s draft.

[From CNN]

It’s written as a series of tweets, isn’t it? “Ladies and gentlemen, I won so big and the crooked media failed so hard, hashtag bigly hashtag sad hashtag exclamation point.” Obviously, the speech is going to be a mess. And obviously, this whole inauguration and the events around it are going to be a mess too. But what’s interesting is that Emperor Baby Fists actually wants this to be the classiest, most exclusive, most bigly event ever.

Photos courtesy of WENN.

Related stories

You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.

293 Responses to “Emperor Baby Fists allegedly wrote his own inaugural address, #bigly #SAD”

Comments are Closed

We close comments on older posts to fight comment spam.

  1. Little Darling says:

    Was it done in 140 characters or less?

      • imqrious2 says:

        It was “written” in the snow (although with those tiny fists, other tiny things may’ve needed help) 💦 💦 💦

    • Nancy says:

      Perfect! Little Darling.

    • Snappyfish says:

      I’m guessing he wrote it in the same manner that Melania wrote her convention speech

    • Megan says:

      NPR Will be providing real time fact checking on their website during his speech. So sad that the media just assumes we can’t believe a word coming out of the president’s mouth. #unpresidented

      • Esmom says:

        I know, I heard that this morning and my blood pressure immediately rose. “Unpresidented” indeed.

      • doula says:

        There’s a lot of talk about people NOT watching the inauguration. The Grabber will be checking his ratings, and many may not know the way that the tv shows are rated.
        To keep his rating LOW, you must have your television turned ON, but NOT tuned into any channel showing ANY inauguration coverage. If you don’t turn your tv on, his ratings will show higher because of the percentage of sets tuned in. So set up all your televisions to the geographic channel or cooking channel! Anything that is not covering the inauguration, basically!
        - Television must be on, but NOT tuned into channels covering Trump.
        Please share this information! Copy and paste and spread the word

      • Tiffany :) says:

        I am so glad they aren’t being intimidated out of fact checking him. We need to support the news organizations that have the courage and the integrity to do this (and do it well).

      • The Other Katherine says:

        @doula, this is not true. You can only affect the ratings if you are a Nielsen family, and you will know if you are one; this isn’t something where they collect info on your viewing habits without your knowing. Google “TV ratings Snopes” for the article where they debunk this rumour.

      • Cacec04 says:

        I’ve actually heard that if you watch it on CSpan it doesn’t show up in the ratings, just fyi. Not that I’ll be watching it at all anyway….

      • whyme says:

        Actually, read this article, it won’t count watching or not watching TV that’s just based specifically on Nielsen ratings, it’s about social media. Don’t watch anything on social media (Facebook, Twitter, etc.), don’t put a little angry face because that doesn’t count, it’s the hits on the videos.

        http://www.cnn.com/2017/01/19/politics/turn-off-tv-inauguration-debunk-trnd/

    • PunkyMomma says:

      Bwahaha! Seriously, I’m doing shots every time he sniffs or checks his Twitter feed. Believe me.

      • Megan says:

        You are going to be bigly drunk.

      • Trashaddict says:

        Seriously this is truly a problem. How DOES one develop a fun and engaging pity party, invite one’s friends to share in the misery, and figure out a gimmick that WON’T get you drunk under the circumstances. Pleasantly tipsy won’t do it, because there’s nothing pleasant about this. Raging drunk is a thought but it would be directed at the wrong target. Passed out drunk maybe, but for 4 years? Sigh, I just don’t know. Somehow acid seems appropriately trippy, but so old school….

    • isabelle says:

      Oh babyfists says he get more characters when he becomes President. Beginning to think its exactly why he wanted to run and win, so he could had more characters to his his Twitter, he will have 280 not 140 after Friday.

    • arock says:

      how much you want to bet it starts out, “Four score and seven years ago” and ends with “believe me”
      jesus h christ its like america said ‘hold my beer, watch this’. i weep.

    • imqrious2 says:

      oops…wrong place

  2. lightpurple says:

    Is that picture on Golf from 50 years ago or is it pure photoshop?

    I will be working on Inauguration Day and ignoring it totally, then prepping for the march on Saturday. It sounds like more people will be attending the Women’s March in Boston than will be attending the actual inauguration.

    ETA I also will be googling terms like: impeachment, emoluments clause, nepotism, conflicts of interest, how does impeachment of the president work? how many Senate votes are needed to remove an impeached president? What is the Chief Justice’s role in impeachment?

    • Miss Jupitero says:

      I’ll be there as well! The numbers of protestors all over the country is pretty impressive.

      As for people “pouring in,” he seems to be unaware that these are mostly protestors. It’s been reported that the inauguration itself is going to have a lot of empty seats– scalpels can’t sell tickets, and Baby Fists himself is having trouble giving them away. Meanwhile 1200 bus loads of protestors are on their way.

      • doofus says:

        there was a push on FB and other social media to request the tickets that he was giving away (did anyone see that pathetic “infomercial”?) and then just toss them.

        would lead to a LOT of empty seats.

      • Christin says:

        My local newspaper’s Web site had the free tickets ad on the home page, but the ad disappeared the following day.

        We’re in a heavily GOP area just a few hours’ drive from DC, so I assume they were ‘rewarding’ the faithful or hoping someone might actually respond and boost attendance.

      • lisac says:

        The number of protestors is impressive and helps me keep complete despair at bay.

        I’m working on Friday, however, many of the students and faculty at the university at which I teach have organized a march to coincide with the exact time that Trump takes the oath. I’ll be participating in that march, and preparing for my city’s Women’s March on Saturday.

        @doofus, that would be lovely to see rows and rows of empty seats.

      • Megan says:

        The seating at the inauguration is actually very limited and is for Congress, the incoming cabinet, senior officials, and those invited by the Inaugural Committee. There are free tickets that allow you to enter the secure zone and be closer to the actual swearing in, but they don’t involve actual seats. Beyond the security zone is the crazy free for all of the National Mall. Getting a ticket is not only bragging rights, it’s vaguely more civilized than the push and pull on the Mall.

        The advertising on Facebook suggests Trump has been unable to unload the free tickets in the secure zone. Honestly, that may be unprecedented. In 2009, people were selling tickets that gave you the privilege of standing in a four hour security line to physically see Obama from a daily hefty distance for $5,000.

      • Belle Epoch says:

        I had heard that as a form of protest you get your free tickets and then DON’T GO. The pathetic turnout would be noticeable if lots of people did this, right?

      • Megan says:

        @Belle Epoch – turnout is already predicted to be less than half of Obama’s. With a 70% chance of rain on Friday, I’m hoping it ends up being less than a quarter of Obama’s turnout.

      • Trashaddict says:

        70% rain, perhaps a chance of toads, hopefully thunder and lightning (Caddyshack comes to mind). I hope the mother of all storms unloads on DC that day like the wrath of God.

      • jwoolman says:

        Shhh. Don’t let President-Elect Stupid know what’s really happening on Saturday, let him keep his illusions. Personally, I hope it’s a bright sunny day both Friday and Saturday because I don’t want people claiming his numbers are down due to rain.

        We want to keep President Stupid happy until someone has the chance to disable his access to the missile launch codes. Let him go play golf in Florida this weekend. Please. And let the guy following him around with the codes oops forget the briefcase at home.

    • KB says:

      I was wondering the same thing. That’s somewhat similar to what he looked like about 90 pounds ago.

      • doofus says:

        a friend of mine posted this on FB yesterday and I said the same thing. way, WAY photoshopped. Like, 50-75 pounds worth.

        slimmed him down and gave him a jawline.

      • Christin says:

        Not just the girth, but his hair and skin coloring has been de-oranged.

    • Rapunzel says:

      The pic from Golf Digest is totally how he sees himself: with 30 years, 80 pounds, and 2 chins removed.

    • nat says:

      But you do realise that if he was impeached, his VP would become just P and that could be even worse…

      • SusanneToo says:

        But it would(fingers crossed)remove his filthy family from the government.

      • B n A fn says:

        @nat; I doubt his VP is in Puton’s pocket or could be any worse than the liar in Chief. . I guess he’s writing his own speech like his wife #3 wrote her speech. I do not believe anything coming out of DT’s mouth or kelleyanne’s mouth.

      • Kitten says:

        Yeah we all realize it and I think a lot of us still feel it’s the better option. Pence is basically the President anyway, except he currently has the added responsibility of babysitting a lunatic.

      • Lightpurple says:

        Pence isn’t one careless Tweet away from starting a war with China.

      • Cerys says:

        Pence might not be everyone’s cup of tea but at least he is not deranged.

      • Who ARE These People? says:

        No. Pence would be bad but not worse. You get the same domestic agenda that you get under Trump, without the indebtedness to Russia and the utter incohorence. Trump is not “pretending” to be hateful and conservative, he IS hateful and conservative – and also deeply compromised. And mad. And giving his kids jobs in the White House.

      • Ashamed 2 b a Fl girl says:

        If Pence was to end up president (refuse to use upper case for any of these people) he would want to be re-elected and might be persuaded to work with the “other side of the aisle”. Also, probably won’t start WWIII because of an imagined insult.

      • ME says:

        People keep saying this but the reality is that Pence is acting President about 80% of the time so we’re losing all around…. we have to deal with Trumputin and Pence. Seeing one go would be easier.

    • Esmom says:

      I’m not sure it’s a photo, I thought it was an illustration.

      And people are not going to the inauguration in “record numbers.” Nice try, Trump.

      • B n A fn says:

        I for one will not be watching the inauguration. I will find something constructive to do during this fiasco. Then I will watch the game show network until fauning about the emperor without clothes is off tv.

        I heard he’s going to take Friday and Saturday off, and will not start working until Monday. I guess he believes it’s a 9-5 job, and off Sat and Sun. This would be funny if it was not so serious.

      • Esmom says:

        B n A fn, I’ll be with my preschool class so I won’t watch it either, thank goodness, although I probably would have taken off work if Hillary had won the election. I have fond memories of watching Obama’s first inauguration with my friends. We were all sobbing, giddy messes.

        And yeah, I’d heard he was taking the weekend off. I wonder what his supporters think of that, after all the grief they aimed at Obama for all his supposed time off? And I also would be laughing if I weren’t trying so hard not to cry.

      • Betsy says:

        It’ll be record-setting, alright. Just not the records he would like to set.
        “Least Legitimate!”
        “Least Attended!”
        “Most Protested!”
        “Worst Musical Acts!”

      • Jay (the Canadian one) says:

        A lower turn out than any inauguration ever before is still a “record number”.

    • Nancy says:

      It is. He claims to be so anti everything and yet he rubbed elbows with all of the “elitists” he claims he isn’t. He is a man of privilege and has fooled a small minority of our population that he is one of us. I guess it is somewhat cathartic to post comments on King Joffrey but I can’t start my day for the next four years doing it. Things aren’t going to pan out well for him and that doesn’t make me happy, it actually scares me. Off to the hair salon I go. Denial works sometimes, momentarily anyway.

    • Little Darling says:

      Check out the pic on Buzzfeed about what the Republicans say about the health care bit. https://www.buzzfeed.com/paulmcleod/republicans-say-they-assume-trump-didnt-mean-to-promise-heal?utm_term=.qmRG6QWvMn#.acoKN7z6GQ

      It finally dawned on me why he hates women so much. It’s because he has a vagina growing on his neck. It allllll makes sense now.

    • isabelle says:

      Same, not watching not turning on one single video. Lord Cheeto wants viewers and good ratings he is already talking about it. The huge crowds coming to DC (mosty protesters) and sending out invites for people to watch. Hell no on giving him a Nielsen rating. He is obsessed with ratings so not giving him one.

    • Odesa says:

      I will be marching in Canada in solidarity!

    • detritus says:

      Apparently he hates being shown without a jacket, which makes this cover possible shade.
      I read an article that was saying these photos of him golfing in the white polo are the last ones available. Apparently he is ashamed of his weight and doesn’t want to be seen without because the jacket is slimming.

    • Lightpurple says:

      Registration for Saturday’s Women’s March in Boston was at 60,000 last night. They’re expecting many who have not registered and are asking for $10 donations so they can put up more video and sound stations to cover the speakers, who include Elizabeth Warren.

    • Tiffany :) says:

      “I will be working on Inauguration Day and ignoring it totally, then prepping for the march on Saturday.”

      Me too. Marching in LA on Saturday with a ton of my friends, and their friends…

      I don’t know what I would say on a sign or T-shirt, though. My feelings are so complex, I am having a hard time thinking of a line that says it all. I am hoping my presence will say enough.

      • Esmom says:

        My friend is having a sign making party on Fri night before the march on Sat. I don’t know what I would say, either. A couple favorites I’ve seen are “I’m not usually a sign guy but geez” and “You know it’s bad when librarians are marching.” Lol.

      • funfactor says:

        I painted a sign that reads “GRAB *THIS* PUSSY, DRUMPF!” in a cool font with my drawing of a snarling tigress head displayed bigly. My friends and I will be marching in Austin.

    • milla says:

      my plan is to listen to George Michael’s “Shoot the Dog”.

      Fits perfectly.

    • Jane says:

      A majority of the U.S. House of Representatives (at least 218 votes) is required to impeach a U.S. President, followed by a two-thirds majority vote in the Senate (at least 67 votes).

      Typically, the lower house of the legislature impeaches the official and the upper house conducts the trial.

      When an impeachment process involves a U.S. President, the Chief Justice of the United States is required to preside during the Senate trial. In all other trials, the Vice President would preside in his capacity as President of the Senate.

      This is all I know.

  3. MunichGirl says:

    Andy Borowitz:

    Trump blamed his record-low approval rating on a “rigged numerical system” and said that numbers were “invented by Arabs.”

    • Embee says:

      The only time he isn’t bitching about it being “rigged” is when he ended up “winning” in the end

    • isabelle says:

      Did he really say that lol? …or is it a math joke? I can’t tell anymore if he said what, that is how sad thing about all of this.

    • jwoolman says:

      Love Andy. He has just the right touch.

      Another one of his little “news” items was about Obama deciding to take the nuclear codes with him, just for safekeeping…

      Then there was one about Hillary’s last-minute change of her campaign slogan to “Won’t Blow Up the Planet.”

      And the one about Queen Elizabeth suggesting we write in her name on our ballots, she was willing to take us back since obviously this independent republic thing wasn’t working out.

      I’m too cheap to get a subscription (ads should pay for it anyway) and would go broke doing it for everything today, so I use Chrome browser on my phone to read such things. Then I can clear the browser cache without losing anything I want to keep. On Chrome, you have to go to Settings and then Privacy to get to that and then they make you tap three different times since it can’t be reversed. Then the mags/newspapers forget you were there and you have another set of free articles.

  4. DeniseMich says:

    #Bigly… good grief… I want to just crawl under a rock. I can not believe this is happening.

  5. AfricanBoy says:

    I definitely won’t be watching it. I don’t want to see or hear Putin’s bitch.

  6. Red Snapper says:

    I’m going to watch every second of it. With wine.

    • LP says:

      Don’t give him the ratings!!

    • IMO says:

      No, don’t! Let’s pray for bad ratings.

    • Embee says:

      If you watch, it looks like someone cares about him. Keep that tv off!

    • isabelle says:

      Wine isn’t going to help this, all of the wine in the world can’t help you unsee that little Lord Farquaad placing his hand on the Bible on the Capital steps.

    • Red Snapper says:

      It’s ok I’m Canadian! Our ratings don’t count. But the nuclear fallout will blow right up here, so I’m watching it.

    • nicole says:

      I kind of want to watch it too, even though I cant stand him or any of his family or sidekicks, and I dont want to give him the ratings, because you know thats all he really cares about, but I am still curious to see how it all goes down, have a feeling its going to be really terrible and who knows what will happen.

    • Flan says:

      I’ve seen people on other websites saying they won’t watch or watch other channels as well.

      • gogoboot says:

        I won’t be watching that Wind Bag Puppet. I will be Netflixing enjoying all the shows I’ve wanted to catch up on.

  7. Sixer says:

    He’s planning on running a country as a reality show, so presumably he’ll have written the equivalent of a Dragon’s Den pitch.

    (I think you guys call it Shark Tank?)

    • adastraperaspera says:

      I’m pretty sure a “you’re fired, American People” will be in there somewhere. Ugh.

    • Lightpurple says:

      He’ll probably tell Obama that he’s fired. I hope he “fires” Congress too. Ryan’s facial expression would be priceless.

  8. Aang says:

    Good. I don’t want him sounding presidential with someone else’s words. Let the world see what our legacy of racism, misogyny, homophobia, xenophobia, and celebrity worship has wrought.

  9. CharlieWaffles says:

    “People are pouring into Washington in record numbers.” – where’s the proof for that, Donald Twitler?

    • KB says:

      More importantly, how many are coming in solely to protest?

    • SusanneToo says:

      The numbers are rigged.😂😂😂

    • isabelle says:

      Protesters, yeah. He keeps saying this over and over. He is so worried he won’t get as many numbers as Obama. Such a small and fragile ego he is that kid in school who was alwyas trying to convince people he is well liked by them by one upping them. SAD!

    • Whiteley says:

      If someone wants to protest on Friday:

      Lawyers are ready to represent demonstrators who get arrested for protesting Donald Trump’s inauguration … TMZ has learned.

      The Partnership for Civil Justice, the National Lawyers Guild, D.C. Law Students in Court and other orgs have a game plan to hit the streets Friday, monitor police conduct, and provide free representation for many demonstrators who may get cuffed and taken to jail.

      An official from the Partnership for Civil Justice tells TMZ, they are worried police will cross the line and arrest protesters who are exercising their constitutional right of free speech.

      We’re told the laws in D.C. have changed recently because of police illegally taking demonstrators into custody. Now, protesters cannot be arrested for demonstrating without a permit. Cops can’t encircle groups of protesters merely to prevent an uprising, and cops can’t go after an entire group because a handful of demonstrators violate the law.

      One of the lawyers organizing the group says she thinks the D.C. cops may show more restraint now that the laws have changed, but she’s worried about the 5,000 National Guard troops and 3,000 cops from various jurisdictions that might overreact.

      We’re told dozens of D.C. area lawyers have committed to free services during inauguration day.

      http://www.tmz.com/2017/01/18/donald-trump-inauguration-protest/

  10. Tobbs says:

    Omg, that last photo is so heavily photo shopped. Sad.

    • Christin says:

      I see what you did there. 😉

    • Original T.C. says:

      Even more sad is Eric Trump posting the cover as though it was a major “accomplishment” for his Dad to make it to the cover of GolfDigest magazine. I would expect the child of a non-famous Housewives reality show to be proud of a nobody parent making it to the cover of a magazine. Even Kim K would pass on a cover like this.

      It shows how insecure and desperate for any type of praise from the media this family craves. I mean Drumf had an orgasm when he made the cover of Time magazine for dubious reasons. I bet they got a gold frame for that cover! Secretly, they KNOW they are losers that most people have no respect for. LOL

  11. Rapunzel says:

    “Make America Great Again. Make America Safe Again. Fake News. Rigged. Lock her up. It’s a disaster. Build the Wall. Mexico will reimburse. Bring back jobs. No puppet no puppet no puppet. You’re the puppet. No pee pee. Fake news. I heart Putin. CNN and Buzzfeed are garbage. Obama, you’re fired. ” – the complete leaked text of Trump’s speech.

  12. Maya says:

    It’s going to epic with his slurred words and hatred etc.

    Just wait until he hears the boos and then watch him explode.

    He simple cannot take it that more than half of the country doesn’t worship him.

    My guess is that since he is going against the Republicans on Obamacare, the impeachment proceedings have already started by the Republicans.

    Either way it’s a lose – lose situation for the republicans. If they repeal Obamacare, millions will lose insurance and they will not vote for them nect local elections.

    Impeach Trump and millions of his voters will leave the party.

    Either way I foresee a good future with the democrats taking Senate back in 2018 and hopefully regains lots of House seats.

    • SusanneToo says:

      “Either way it’s a lose – lose situation for the republicans. If they repeal Obamacare, millions will lose insurance and they will not vote for them nect local elections.
      Impeach Trump and millions of his voters will leave the party.”

      One would like to think so, but don’t underestimate stupid.

    • Bess says:

      If you think this is a lose-lose situation for the GOP, you haven’t been watching politics in this country for very long. Trump is their carnival barker. He will say ridiculous things to keep the media’s attention while the GOP destroys every vestige of FDR’s New Deal.

      The GOP base won’t hold them accountable for taking away their healthcare, Medicare or Social Security. The GOP will find a way to blame the Democrats and their base will buy it.

      • Who ARE These People? says:

        Blame the Democrats, right after they blame immigrants, black people, Latinos and Jews. And maybe women. Oh, and people who are gay. Anyone but themselves.

    • Lightpurple says:

      But he really isn’t going against them on the ACA. His plan is being written by Price. Price, along with Ryan, wrote several of the 80 or so healthcare bills the House passed over the past few years. Ryan is pushing a proposal that is identical to the last bill Price wrote; Medical Savings Accounts, Buy Across State Lines, Tort Reform to the point where patients recover nothing, and high risk Pools.

      • Who ARE These People? says:

        Yup. Basically – high cost, low coverage, and doctors not held accountable.

      • Kitten says:

        @ LightPurple-My BF has been watching CSPAN at work for most of today and said our gal Liz Warren went IN on Tom Price on entitlements and stock trade. He said Hassan asked about an opiate tax. *eyeroll*

        Sad that addiction treatment will no longer be covered now that ACA is dead.

    • ida says:

      @Maya “since he is going against the Republicans on Obamacare, the impeachment proceedings have already started by the Republicans” THAT is exactly what I think!

  13. Shambles says:

    What he doesn’t mention is that most of the people pouring into Washington are doing so to protest his inauguration.

    And of course he won’t strike a conciliatory tone. He’s a 70 year old authoritarian. He will never pivot. He said and did all the sh!t that he did and he still got the White House. What reason does he have to change now?

  14. Marcy says:

    My stomach is in knots, and I’m literally physically ill thinking of it. I feel like it is the end of an era. In all my life I’ve never felt so filled with dread and fear, the hate in people is showing more and more hitting a more verbal and action filled way since his win. I have friends overseas where the air is turning against America due to his hate filled speeches, threats about raising import taxes, and talking ill of their countries. We now have a bullseye target on our back where before it was hidden, and people needed Americas help, now they can all rally together and knock us down worse then his favorite boyfriend a-kissers country. I even have my first grey hair due to all this, because I literally feel a feeling of foreboding that we are going to get hit hard back a hundred years and all feel the depression. Makes me want to hoard some food or something, but living near military bases I can only imagine what will happen around us. I fear for our kids who will not have that innocent childhood we have had. He is literally turning us into a dictatorship and stripping away everything stupid idiot does not even think about his own children or grandchildren what you do to America affects them too, but he does not care he is mental and all those who eat and buy his crock of poo are just as lost as he is. Instead of making America great again he will be known as stripping way the white and blue and leaving only the red.

    • Kitten says:

      I’m not gonna lie: I really fear for my friends’ kids. My BF and I said on Election night after his win that it’s official: we’re never having kids. World is just too scary…

  15. Jenns says:

    It will be great. Just tremendous. And you know, we have the best people. The best. We’re going to do so many great things. People will be amazed. Just amazing. And Obamacare is a disaster. We’re going to replace with something even better. It will be terrific. Everyone will be covered beautifully. Just look at the crowd. So great. So many terrific people here. Obama didn’t get this crowd you know. He supported crooked Hillary and lost bigly. So sad. But today we’re doing great things. America will be great again. We’re going to build the wall. It will be terrific. I’ve spoken to many people and they say what we are doing is great. People will just be amazed at what we will do. History books are already writing about this historic campaign. But CNN and other fake news outlets are telling lies about the polls. They’re awful. Just awful. Fake news. We’ll change all that. Look at this crowd. You people are so amazing. You don’t watch CNN. Their ratings are terrible. And SNL. What a nasty show. Just awful. But we’re great. And things are going to be amazing.

    Now, here’s 3 Doors Down.

    • KatM says:

      He might just plagiarize this. Apparently, 3 Doors Down is part of the “sensual” celebration. : )

    • Neelyo says:

      Hahaha!!!! i’m still not quite sure who they are and I don’t think I’m alone.

      • SusanneToo says:

        They’re from a teensy town about 25 miles west of Mobile. They play small clubs here to very small crowds. Probably jumped at the exposure.

      • doofus says:

        currently residing in the “where are they now?” category. had like, ONE big hit about 15 years ago. and it wasn’t even that good of a song.

      • TotallyBiased says:

        They WERE a band I was a fan of…Now they are as nothing to me.

        Miss Me When I’m Gone was our deployment anthem. It still (or at least until last week) brings tears when I think of the people we lost in Iraq.

      • Jenns says:

        I get them confused with Third Eye Blind.

      • Neelyo says:

        My Bf played one of their songs for me and it could have been Nickelback or Creed or any other generic early 2000s era rock band. He claimed it was their biggest hit but there was absolutely nothing memorable about it.

    • NK says:

      Brilliant, Jenns.

    • Christin says:

      He may also take a moment to randomly insult Rosie, the Springsteen cover band that bailed, and who knows who else.

      Won’t be surprised if a few business-related plugs are included. ‘The hotel is at capacity, the taco salad is great, and check out my smokin’ hot daughter’s dress, which is available online…’

      • Esmom says:

        I could sadly imagine him doing all of this. His cluelessness and pettiness and opportunism knows no bounds.

    • Mltpsych says:

      Perfect

    • I Choose Me says:

      Jenns, this looks frighteningly accurate. I’m not going to watch the inauguration but I will read the transcript of his speech just to compare the two.

    • nicole says:

      Jenns, I am reading that and playing Trumps voice in my head saying it, brilliant stuff.

    • cathy says:

      This site REALLY needs an “up arrow”. I’m giving you one right now!!!!

  16. JulP says:

    I’m planning on making borscht and binge drinking vodka to celebrate the inauguration of our new Russian overlord.

    And yeah … I highly doubt he’s going to be conciliatory. I would bet money on him using his inauguration speech to trash his rivals (including Hillary) and anyone who has spoken out against him thus far.

  17. BengalCat2000 says:

    I’ll be working all day. Just downloaded Pat Benetar’s greatest hits and got a bag of weed. No radio or news. I can’t believe this is real.

    • Little Darling says:

      BengalCat2000~ I love you girl!! Great plan.

    • Shambles says:

      Yes honey. I love it.

      I also will not watch it. I’m considering turning off my phone for the entire day. No news, nothing. I will not give him the satisfaction of one more viewer

    • Kitten says:

      I was just looking at my stash last night and it’s already time for me to re-up again. BF got me a really nice vape for my bday and we’ve been hitting that thing HARD in the wake of Trump’s win.
      Puff puff pass ladies. Sigh.

      We don’t have any real plans aside from NOT watching it and getting really drunk.

    • mia girl says:

      This is one of my favorite comments EVER! Can I come over and join you?!

      @shambles – I will not watch one second of content related to the Grimauguration and I’ve considered doing the same in terms of tech blackout.

      But there is that Broadway Cares Concert for America airing on FB live at the same time as the Orangeskinagutation so I may cheat to watch that.

    • Neelyo says:

      Second that. Work, Pilates then lots of weed. Black squaring my profile on FB and not logging in all day or watching anything besides TCM.

      My soundtrack will be The B-52s and X.

      • BengalCat2000 says:

        I looooooooove both of those bands, especially X (both put on great shows). Adding to my playlist! All of you are welcome to my party o’ one!

        OT, but yesterday in my art class I snapped at a couple of my students for talking about Trump. “This is an Art class, not a Civics class!” I need to tone it down. *grabs more Xanax*

      • Little Darling says:

        Bengal, one of my besties and I have been signing our comms off with xoxoxoxanaxo since the election. No joke. It’s like THAT up in here.

        SIDENOTE: Kaiser and CB – how about an open thread for the drunk/stoned/80′s band loving/inauguration not watching Celebitches?

      • BengalCat2000 says:

        @Little Darling, Lololololol!!! I’m totally stealing that, love it!!! 😘

      • Neelyo says:

        @Little Darling – I love that idea. Will definitely need a place to commiserate. xoxoxanaxo

        @ BengalCat2000 – I would love to see X perform, i bet they are amazing.

      • Lightpurple says:

        Great soundtrack!

    • Brittney B. says:

      Right there with you. I’m in Denver, so the protest march on Friday will actually take me right past some excellent places to re-up.

      (Let’s be honest, I might need more by the next day. Good thing Saturday is the Women’s March.)

  18. Eric says:

    @eric trump: that’s not a compliment. Sad!

    I’ve read that Genghis Con will be cobbling together speeches by JFK and Reagan so it could be a speech analogous to the one Melanoma gave claiming she was raised a black child in south Chicago.

    If the “press conference” Emperor Zero gave is any indication, this speech will be a total mess…maybe Lawyer Dillon can interrupt midway and Pence can give a few choice words against the press before the Orange Headliner. Might there be a stack of empty envelopes next to Il Douche? Will there be a small vocal contingent of family members clapping and cheering?

    It’s sounds disastrous!

    • Esmom says:

      How could it be anything but disastrous? I’m still reeling from that press conference, not sure if I’ll even be recovered in time to hear his inauguration performance.

    • I Choose Me says:

      I’m collecting euphemisms for the Orange One and in your post is full of gems. Thanks for the much needed chuckle.

      • Eric says:

        Pol Pot-belly, Orange Julius Caesar, Genghis Con (or Khan-artist), Generalissimo Cheeto, Adolf Twitler, King Joffrey, Lord Tyrant (Tywin), Emperor Zero (Nero), Idiot Amin, Agent Orange, Orange Nightmare, Il Douche (Il Duce), Emperor Cheeto.
        His sons are American Psychos or the Krays and his daughter that counts is Ivanka the Terrible.

    • jwoolman says:

      So we can expect “ask not what your country can do for you – ask what you can do for me!”?

  19. Maura says:

    This sinking feeling in my gut just won’t go away for the foreseeable future, will it?

  20. Wait&See says:

    Everything he doesn’t like is rigged lol (“The same people who did the phony election polls, and were so wrong, are now doing approval rating polls. They are rigged just like before.”)

  21. Nicole says:

    Cool day 1 of the US being an international embarrassment is close at hand.

  22. HH says:

    The Big Cheeto as President, heaven help us.

  23. Rapunzel says:

    At this point, I’m praying that Russia hacks the satellite feed and interrupts DT’s inauguration with the supposedly fake Golden Showers tape. In HD. Would serve his supporters right.

    • Kitten says:

      That would be the most amazing thing ever.
      Please make this happen, Putin!

      • Rapunzel says:

        I seriously think this could be happening. Wasn’t C-SPAN recently interrupted by RT (Russia Today) during it’s broadcast? Could they be preparing the way?

        Gah! It pisses me off so much that so many folks worried about Obama being some sort of Islamic sleeper agent for ISIS, but none of those people are worried about Trump being a Manchurian Candidate for Putin.

      • Kitten says:

        IKR? Just more hypocrisy on the Right.

      • Timbuktu says:

        @Rapunzel
        I’ve been saying it for so long! I wasn’t a citizen when Obama was first elected, so I was a bit detached from the election (and I liked Hillary enough that I didn’t care if she won instead, so I honestly didn’t have any special feelings about him), so the hysteria was such that even I had a thought or two about “well, wouldn’t it be clever”…
        What’s most baffling to me is that Obama has 1 day left and there are STILL people screaming that he supported Muslims and had an anti-American agenda. Sigh. Yes, by all means, let me go find middle ground with them.

    • robyn says:

      Putin wants Donald to “succeed” with his threats so he can destroy European unions and destabilize the region. So as long as Trump plays nice, Russia has his back and we won’t be seeing any embarrassing videos. Besides, DT has no shame and his supporters don’t either.

      • Rapunzel says:

        Putin wants Donald to succeed is one interpretation of their relationship. I’m not sure it’s correct.

        Another interpretation is that Vlad is just using Trumpski to cause major drama and distraction so he (Vlad) can do what he wants in his region of the world. In this second interpretation, the Russians releasing damaging goods during the actual inauguration would be part of their plan– cause chaos, distract, divert attention.

        I also think it’s possible that Putin was buddy with Trump, but now that too much has come to light, he’s no longer useful except in the second way I outline. So, we could have moved from scenario one to scenario two.

    • doofus says:

      Russia won’t, but Anonymous just might. they’ve been threatening him all week.

      • robyn says:

        That would be great but so far Anonymous has been a great disappointment. Where are Trump’s taxes … I’m not sure even the CIA or FBI have seen those. How can this be … letting someone into the highest office without seeing conflicts or potential conflicts. It’s insanity and so far Anonymous has failed while Wiki Leaks and Russia helped sway the election.

      • Kori says:

        Robyn–my view too. They could’ve hacked great stuff–if the dossier is to be believed (even in part) there’s certainly no lack of tidbits. Plus court records, taxes, emails, etc. But they did nada.

    • PunkyMomma says:

      From your lips, Rapunzel . . . .

    • Christin says:

      That would be ‘golden’.

      I watched an interview with an intelligence analyst last night, and he was stifling laughs as he described how well Vladdy is playing to his orange ‘asset’. He’s being played like a fiddle.

  24. robyn says:

    Makes me sick to think of the gloating going on in Putin’s Russia right now. I bet they will be watching the inauguration, but I sure won’t. Putin quietly won a war with the US and got away with it installing his corrupt p*ssygrabbing conman into the White House.

    Is Putin’s puppet writing his own speech the way Melania did (seriously people she is NOT his victim but a willing participant)? Remember she lied that she wrote her own speech and was called out for plagiarizing Michelle Obama.

    Being afraid doesn’t help … be vigilant when he pulls his con act on a free press and others.

  25. grabbyhands says:

    I could see him being stupid enough to read something he’s written himself and it will be a word salad of pseudo patriotic verbal clickbait and gibberish,

    But I could also see him having a speechwriter write it and then lying and saying he wrote it, as I don’t think he’s capable of communicating in anything other than buzzword soundbytes longer than 140 characters.

  26. SusanneToo says:

    I saw one suggestion that people tune their tvs to a channel not showing the inauguration, so as to skew ratings.

    • Nicole says:

      Yep because that will be a blow to his ego

    • Christin says:

      Since I will be at work, I plan to DVR movies the entire time and play them back that evening, so the ratings will shift. Supposedly if you have a satellite / cable box, it transfers your viewing selections every night (including what you DVR, if watched within a certain number of hours).

      • isabelle says:

        So glad I’ll be at work. Although when I worked during Obama’s inauguration my co-workers and our guests (work in a conference hotel) gathered together to watch it. People actually cried and our guests even sung a few freedom songs. This one not one mention of anyone watching it. We planned a meeting actually haha. meetings are better than watching Trump.

      • Christin says:

        We have a large TV in the common area outside my office, and occasionally people will gather if something big is on CNN. I want to see how many will pause to watch on Friday. Fortunately we keep the sound at or near zero, so I can ignore it otherwise.

      • nicole says:

        If you live in another country, I live in Ireland, and you watch the anaugaration on CNN international, will that count as ratings for him?

    • KV says:

      I’ll be working, but I’m going to leave my tv on History Channel for the Ancient Aliens marathon during the Inauguration.

  27. SusanneToo says:

    A reminder of what we once had, a president who understands the value of reading. Now going from that to a man who hasn’t read a book in 65 years(according to his ghostwriter).

    http://www.nytimes.com/2017/01/16/books/transcript-president-obama-on-what-books-mean-to-him.html?smid=tw-share&_r=0

  28. Marcy says:

    Just read somewhere that Donald Trump’s Inaugural Poem Is About Defeating a ‘Tyrant’ and Slavery.

    • Kitten says:

      I really hope you’re just playing…

      • Macscore says:

        I read that too; the Independent (UK) reported that an American poet had written a “classical” poem in honour of the inauguration, based on Trump’s mother’s Scottish background (she was a MacLeod). It’s an appalling piece of jingoist crap, of course; my feeling is it’s a satire of a little-known Scottish poet named William McGonegal, whose attempts at weighty themes were beyond laughable.
        Here’s the “poem” by “celebrated American poet Joseph Charles McKenzie”: (try not to throw up at the bit about a “woman’s first right”).I take it the “Domhnall” is the Donald…

        “Come out for the Domhnall, ye brave men and proud,
        The scion of Torquil and best of MacLeod!
        With purpose and strength he came down from his tower
        To snatch from a tyrant his ill-gotten power.
        Now the cry has gone up with a cheer from the crowd:
        “Come out for the Domhnall, the best of MacLeod!”
        When freedom is threatened by slavery’s chains
        And voices are silenced as misery reigns,
        We’ll come out for a leader whose courage is true
        Whose virtues are solid and long overdue.
        For, he’ll never forget us, we men of the crowd
        Who elected the Domhnall, the best of MacLeod!
        When crippling corruption polluted our nation
        And plunged our economy into stagnation,
        As self-righteous rogues took the opulent office
        And plump politicians reneged on their promise
        The forgotten continued to form a great crowd
        That defended the Domhnall, the best of MacLeod!
        The Domhnall’s a giver whilst others just take,
        Ne’er gaining from that which his hands did not make.
        A builder of buildings, employing good men,
        He’s enriched many cities by factors of ten.
        The honest and true gladly march with the crowd
        Standing up for the Domhnall, the best of MacLeod!
        True friend of the migrant from both far and near,
        He welcomes the worthy, but guards our frontier,
        Lest a murderous horde, for whom hell is the norm,
        Should threaten our lives and our nation deform.
        We immigrants hasten to swell the great crowd.”
        Coming out for the Domhnall, the best of MacLeod!
        Academe now lies dead, the old order rots,
        No longer policing our words and our thoughts;
        Its ignorant hirelings pretending to teach
        Are backward in vision, sophomoric in speech.
        Now we learnèd of mind add ourselves to the crowd
        That cheers on the Domhnall, the best of MacLeod!
        The black man, forgotten, in poverty dying,
        The poor man, the sick man, with young children crying,
        The soldier abroad and the mother who waits,
        The young without work or behind prison gates,
        The veterans, wounded, all welcome the crowd
        That fights for the Domhnall, the best of MacLeod!
        Whilst hapless old harridans flapping their traps
        Teach women to look and behave like us chaps,
        The Domhnall defends the defenseless forlorn;
        For, a woman’s first right is the right to be born.
        Now the bonnie young lassies that fly to the crowd
        Have a champion in Domhnall, the best of MacLeod!”

        PS: I am proud to be here amongst this group of “hapless old harridans flapping their traps”! xoxoxo

      • Kitten says:

        OMG. I think I just threw up a little O_O

    • MellyMel says:

      I hope that’s a joke.

      • SusanneToo says:

        I would have thought it was a sly satire except that it was written for American Thinker, a right wing internet rag.
        It’s not an official inaugural poem, although if barely literate cheeto hears about it, I’m sure he’ll be tweeting about how bigly glorious it is.

  29. Lulu says:

    I honestly still can’t believe this is real … and maybe I’m going to sound as thick as sh*t now but I don’t honestly understand how DT became president ! I mean I understand he was voted for , he was the republican candidate, but I don’t get how that happened. He has no history in politics, no experience, he’s a businessman with a chequered history, and a reality to star , it just baffles me. I’m british and here you have to be an MP , be elected leader of the party your a member of , and then go forward in the general election… i just can’t get my brain around it all

    • Skippy says:

      And you are so blessed, Lulu. This is truly a national nightmare here in the US. As you can see there are many who detest Trump.
      I personally feel this will all end badly. I only pray the country survives.

      • Lulu says:

        I would never call us blessed with the way the conservative government are handling things, but compared to u guys across the pond it does feel that way . I read and I read about this bcos I’m so genuinely interested , but despite how much I take in, I’m still stuck on the “how did this happen”

    • nicole says:

      It is amazing how it happend, but the thing that interests me the most is how it is going to play out, will he be successfull or will he be a complete failure, nobody knows until he starts the job on Friday or in his case Monday, its going to be a big gamble and I hope for the peoples sake that is will be a success, but I dont have a good feeling that it will, he is just too erratic in everything he does, thats not a good thing for a president.

  30. SusanneToo says:

    President Obama will hold his final press conference at 2:15 EST today.

  31. Harla Jodet says:

    When I read about the bikers showing up to help with “security” I can’t help but think about the horrible Rolling Stones concert in 1969 when the Hells Angels provided security for their concert that resulted in several deaths and serious injuries. I can see this going all kinds of sideways :(

    • Hazel says:

      That was my first thought, too. Altamont. This could be ugly.

    • Nina says:

      NO, are they actually coming to help provide security?! I thought that they were just coming as supporters. My god, this is going to be a crapfest of epic proportions. I was initially going to watch just for a laugh, but I’m already in knots about turning 30 the following day, and I don’t need to go out of my way to feel even more apprehensive about the future than I already do. And I’m Canadian! We still have Trudeau up here, but Trump’s election has emboldened our gross, racist, bigots to say whatever they want, and Kevin O’Leary officially announced his intentions to run as leader of the Conservative Party today. He’s Canadian Trump. An arrogant TV commentator, who brags about not being able to speak French, one of our two official languages, because according to him, he “speaks the language of jobs”. And I’m certain that unless Trump’s presidency goes down in flames quickly, that O’Leary will be our next PM. :(

    • adastraperaspera says:

      The Bikers Rally permit does not allow for them to bring their motorcycles to the park where it takes place. I do think they will try to drive around town like pretend-cop idiots all weekend, but good luck trying to get through the massive traffic, closed roads, barricades, etc. On their Facebook page, they whine about being the only pro-Trump rally that has a permit (not counting the ridiculous spectacle of the corrupt inauguration itself).

      The Washington Post has information on all rallies. The Bikers for Trump info is included:

      https://www.washingtonpost.com/express/wp/2017/01/13/your-guide-to-inauguration-demonstrations-marches-and-protests/?utm_term=.290961dd7d0c

      • lightpurple says:

        I think they’re trying to be like Rolling Thunder on Memorial Day weekend but Rolling Thunder they are not.

  32. IlsaLund says:

    Rain is forecast for Friday’s inauguration in Washington, D.C. Trump will use the weather as an excuse as to why there weren’t bigger crowds at his coronation. Now, the weather for Saturday’s Women’s March is forecast to be sunny with temps in the 50′s.

  33. JustME says:

    http://edition.cnn.com/2017/01/18/politics/obama-approval-rating-cnn-orc-poll/index.html

    “President Barack Obama will leave office Friday with his highest approval rating since 2009, his presidency largely viewed as a success, and a majority saying they will miss him when he is gone.

    A new CNN/ORC poll finds Obama’s approval rating stands at 60%, his best mark since June of his first year in office. Compared with other outgoing presidents, Obama lands near the top of the list, outranked only by Bill Clinton’s 66% in January 2001 and Ronald Reagan’s 64% in January 1989. About two-thirds (65%) say Obama’s presidency was a success, including about half (49%) who say that was due to Obama’s personal strengths rather than circumstances outside his control.”

  34. I'mScaredAsHell says:

    Did anyone else hear about the Inaugural Committee not releasing names of all the A list entertainers who are performing at the inaugural balls because they were afraid they’d cancel if their names were released….lol

  35. Catherine says:

    True story: in September I bought a ball gown to attend Hillary’s inaugural ball. It sits in my closet, as a sad reminder of my ridiculous optimism. I can’t turn into Miss. Havisham this weekend!!!! I won’t watch. How can I stay sane and avoid depression spiral? PLEASE ADVISE!!!

    • Lama Bean says:

      I’ll let you know when I find out. I still cry at the sight of Hillary. Makes me so angry at how poorly they treated that woman.

      • Kori says:

        And she will be sitting there on stage, on camera having to watch HIM get sworn in despite the millions votes more she received. I’d have to take so much Xanax.

      • Lama Bean says:

        I swear I wish she would just Kanye the inauguration and scream “You know this should be me”. Maybe it could be Bill to do it…

    • MellyMel says:

      I’ve upped my yoga and meditation sessions since November and it’s helped. And also wine lol

    • adastraperaspera says:

      Hi Catherine, my wife, daughter and I bought tickets to fly to DC to celebrate Hillary’s Inauguration. And then this happened. We chose to keep the tickets and go together to the Women’s March there. It has been difficult to keep it together, with all of us so angry and upset. I am not a Facebooker, but my wife has found Pantsuit Nation and other forums to participate in to stay positive. Of course, it is important to grieve, too. We’ve gone through a lot of kleenex! Ultimately, I think we all have to go through the stages of grief and then power up to start the fight against him and all he stands for. We made some small donations to LGBT organizations already, which made us feel better. We’ve also got our massage table out and are making sure to exercise. These things sound so inadequate! But little steps will keep us all healthy and sane. We can’t give in to despair! That is what he wants.

      • Kitten says:

        Wow, that’s a great way to turn a frown upside-down. I hope you guys enjoy the camaraderie and unity of the March. I’ll be there in spirit!

  36. MellyMel says:

    The sad thing is I was planning to stay home from work and watch when I thought Hillary would win, but not now! Nope not watching at all! Don’t want to add to the bigly ratings he cares so much about, plus I don’t want to be physically ill. Will be at work avoiding the news/social media as much as possible. And wearing black because obviously.

  37. QQ says:

    Guys I’ve been Reading that Is Not enough to not watch, that we must if at all able turn our tvs to some other programming altogether so that then the total numbers of viewership that tuned in to watch is very low, so for what is worth Animal Channel Marathon here I come!!!

    • Christin says:

      I posted this upthread, but even if you won’t be home, a DVR will also count (as long as you ‘watch’ it within a day or so after recording). I want to say it counts if it is 48 or 72 hours, but to be safe, I am playing it back that evening.

    • Lightpurple says:

      In that case, I do hope my cat enjoys whatever local programming the community access channel is offering that day.

      • Kitten says:

        Yeah I plan on putting Animal Planet on while we’re at the bar. Hopefully there are some bird shows to keep my two furballs entertained.

    • The Other Katherine says:

      It’s not true — you have to be a household signed up with Nielsen, the company that compiles TV ratings, for your viewing choices to affect the ratings. Google “TV ratings Snopes” for the Snopes article debunking this rumour.

    • jwoolman says:

      Snopes is saying that only Nielsen families will count in the ratings, but I wonder how true that is today. Certainly cable companies have numbers for how many sets are viewing what channels at any given time. Can’t those numbers be retrieved as long as they are not attached to individual customers? The Nielsen approach seems archaic in so many ways. For instance, how did they know 80 million people were watching one of the debates?

      Views on YouTube and websites likewise are easily counted, both life and recorded.

  38. LuvHotGuyFri says:

    So surreal. This is really happening.
    To me this feels the same as other huge and horrible things in my life like 9/11, my sister passing away, quitting my job-for weeks/months after each of these it would hit me and I’d think ‘wow-that really happened’. I can’t believe this imbecile will be our leader and it will take time to sink in.
    I am committed to being more kind, more empathetic, and more vocal about what I feel is right and wrong-I don’t know any other way to deal with this shitstorm.

    • Christin says:

      My parents followed the news every day, and both passed away during 2015. He announced his candidacy that summer, and I remember half-joking with my mother that we’d be in a war before the Inauguration concluded. I think about how concerned they would be, because this is far more surreal than I imagined just over a year ago.

  39. Nico says:

    I say we call it Black Friday. I’m not sure if anyone else has coined that, but honestly it’s what it will be to me. I’m not watching any news, and I hope I don’t hear anything at work. Honestly, I hope I don’t cry at work. I’m panicking over Friday. Let’s just hope he gets impeached.

  40. cathy says:

    I won’t be watching any of it…. but if he actually wrote it, I’m sure it will be intelligible.

    • Pandy says:

      Like he’s able to stick to a script. Even one he “wrote” all by himself! It will be a shit show.

  41. Say What says:

    I will be in a yoga class when Trump gets sworn in, but since he is such a great orator I hope to read these key points in his speech, based on his amazing analysis of the World in his tweets. This speech of course will unify the U.S.

    1) Sexism, racism, and homophobia
    2) Narcissistic behavior
    3) Self-aggrandizement
    4) Celebrity feuds
    5) Highlighting the Darkness of his fan base
    6) Fear-mongering foreign policy
    7) Insulting the competition
    8) Rants about political correctness
    9) Finally,taking back America : “Make America Great Again,”
    10) Fake news

  42. Greenieweenie says:

    Well, the more he insists approval ratings are fake, the likelier his time in office will be abbreviated. I hope he keeps on insisting the world is a magical place of his own creation and no objective reality exists.

  43. Ferd says:

    *A Shot for Every Sniff*!

    Lol!!!

    You commentators vicious, hilarious and so truthful!

  44. SusanneToo says:

    Hopefully, there are some Woodward and Bernstein 2.0′s out there that will help bring him down.

    http://www.cjr.org/covering_trump/trump_white_house_press_corps.php

  45. I'mScaredAsHell says:

    I read this on the Huffington Post:

    “The Congressional Budget Office just issued a report on the likely effects of a Republican effort to repeal Obamacare immediately but keep some elements of the coverage expansion in place for two years.
    The numbers are staggering and suggest the GOP will find it difficult to keep its promise of an “orderly transition,” unless they deviate significantly from a prototype repeal bill they passed last year.
    Within the first year, the CBO predicts, 18 million people would lose insurance. In addition, premiums for people buying coverage on their own would increase, on average, by 20 to 25 percent relative to what they would be if the Affordable Care Act remained in place.
    And that’s just the short-term effects that a “repeal-and-delay” strategy would have. Once Obamacare’s tax credits and Medicaid expansion expired fully, the CBO says, millions more could lose insurance and premiums would rise yet again.”

    I can’t believe people bought into this whole get rid of Obamacare thing. Wait until they come after Social Security and Medicare.

    I hate people.

    • Radley says:

      People have been so successfully dumbed down (hello neglect of public schools by Republicans) that they vote on emotion and slogans and not facts. There’s too many adults who process information like children in this country. Much like Trump himself. They deserve each other.

  46. Giddy says:

    Just think about how the White House staff must feel.(talking about the permanent staff) They are losing a lovely, warm family and gaining a smug, narcissistic asshole! I’m sure many will be in tears, but of course they have to welcome Trump and his minions. Their jobs literally depend on it.

    • Nina says:

      But doesn’t each president get his own personal staff?

      • lightpurple says:

        There are permanent employees of the building like the butlers and cleaning staff and curators and historians and others.

    • Timbuktu says:

      No worries! I have a neighbor that works there. She told me that HRC was horrible to the staff back in her days, and that they were all worried about it. But that they heard that Trump was “very nice”, so they are happy and relieved that he is their new boss.
      Don’t ask me who “they” are, telling it like it was told me. I was too stunned that someone can possibly argue that Trump is “nice” to press further.

  47. SF says:

    Do you remember Melania’s Convention speech that we were told she “wrote herself?” That is, until the plagiarism poop hit the fan and they blamed it all on her speechwriter.

    WAIT?!?!!?! SHE USED A SPEECHWRITER?

    I am a speechwriter. I have written for many celebs and politicians. Typically a great politician doesn’t mention a speechwriter because it’s known that speechwriters are used.

    Only small, insecure people loudly cry they don’t use writers — and I guarantee you they are the ones who do the least or no actual “writing.”

    In my career I’ve had dozens of people stand next to me as I write, read what I’m saying, offer not a single revision and later insist they wrote it without any help.

    Actors, politicians all have and need writers. When you buy a book, look for “as told to” or “with” in the credits. That’s the person who wrote the book.

    • IlsaLund says:

      Wonder if will be anything like his convention speech.😭😂

      • SF says:

        I’d guess it will. He only has so many thoughts and catchphrases. Truly, what else is has he got to say?

        What’s scarier is what he does. Ignore what he says. Watch what he does — or tries to do.

  48. tw says:

    Let me guess, the speech will be filled with a mix of bragging and talking shit. And the White House will be transformed into a gold-plated tacky mess. The only good news in months is there’s 4:1 odds on an impeachment in the first 6 months. We can only hope.

  49. Radley says:

    I’m just gonna relax with an alcoholic beverage on Friday night, turn on MSNBC and watch the lowlights. Hopefully I’ll be able to laugh at him, at least.

  50. IlsaLund says:

    President Obama leaves a lasting legacy:

    “He didn’t always get everything right, but he sure did do a lot to help the world’s poorest people. And he didn’t just talk the talk, but he acted on what he said. Take a look:
    President Obama created the Feed the Future initiative, which, in some countries, has decreased malnutrition by up to 40% and poverty by up to 36%.
    The President helped 15 million more people get access to electricity with Power Africa and signed the Electrify Africa Act to continue its good work.
    President Obama expanded PEPFAR, quadrupling the number of people receiving HIV/AIDS treatment to nearly 11.5 million, including 1.1 million children.
    Obama also made sure that the U.S. was the top emergency food aid donor, reaching more than 400 million people, as well as the top donor to the Ebola crisis, providing $2.5 billion.”

    • Kitten says:

      Don’t worry I’m sure Trump will do just as much! LOLOLOLOL

      No but seriously thanks for posting this. Sigh. Gonna miss that guy.

  51. Kelly says:

    I saw that pic he tweeted of him “writing” his inaugural speech at what he called the “Winter White House Mar-a-Lago” and my first thought was, “Didn’t the Russian czars have a Winter Palace?” This dude thinks he’s a czar and should be called to the mat by everyone, at every opportunity.

    • SusanneToo says:

      Remember when the right wing nutbags went crazy about the term czar being applied to President Obama appointees? Like that was the first time it was used. Goes back to Wilson. Dumbass morons.
      http://time.com/3516927/history-of-white-house-czars/

      • Kelly says:

        They have mastered the art of selective memory. I also just found out that Trump has already managed to screw my job. I’m a mortgage underwriter and the President had just lowered monthly mortgage insurance rates on FHA loans (that were previously increased to crazy high rates in response to the crash) and Darth Orange has said they will be reversing that on Friday as one of his “12:01″ changes. Because why give people the opportunity to lower their monthly mortgage payment when you can be petty?

      • Annetommy says:

        What on earth….madness.

      • SusanneToo says:

        @Annetommy. Yes, back then, when President Obama’s people were referred to as the “Energy Czar” or the “Education Czar,” etc. the nut cases were raging about the “commie Russian” affiliation. They’re loving the Russian affiliation now. Pure hatred, that’s all it was.

    • Timbuktu says:

      Except that in Russia, the Winter palace was where you actually wintered, in the middle of the capital, and Summer palace was in the country side (not in the south of the country) and that’s where you spent summers. But it’s not like I expected Trump to know that.

  52. lightpurple says:

    More congressional members are pulling out of the inaugural. Mike Capuano added his name to the list today and sent out this email. I suspect quite a few of them will be doing events like this.

    Dear Friends,

    While I have great respect for the office of the President and I accept the results of the election, I will not attend the Inaugural. Instead I am holding an open house at my Cambridge District Office, located at 110 First Street from 8:00 – 10:00 AM on Friday the 20th. So many of you have contacted my office to raise concerns about the future of our great country I wanted the opportunity to hear from you directly. Please spread the word to anyone you think might want to stop by.

    • Kitten says:

      YES. I heard E Denise Simmons is going. Disappointing…

    • IlsaLund says:

      The last time this many Congressman boycotted an inauguration was in 1973, when 80 members boycotted Richard Nixon’s re-inauguration.

    • mayamae says:

      HW Bush and Barbara will obviously be absent since they’ve been hospitalized. I really wish Dubya would use that as an excuse to be absent. It would kill Trump not to have the living Republican former presidents there. In fact, Clinton is so close to HW that he should be at his bedside as well, and his “dutiful wife” will have to be at his side. Carter is 92 and can decline due to his age. This would leave only the Obamas, and Trump would be forced to be grateful.

      • Timbuktu says:

        You know, my first thought when I saw the news was “I wonder if they are faking and turned a routine check-up into an emergency just to avoid going”. :-)
        Obviously, not a laughing matter if they aren’t faking.

      • Christin says:

        Carter was the first to RSVP and as of Christmas, was the only one who had agreed to attend. He’s known for promoting peace, so he will probably go.

  53. Anastasia says:

    That golf picture of him is super old.

    He’s gross, I hate him, the end.

  54. CatJ says:

    The news here just said Donald was talking about the first sentence of his speech; he is going to “thank all the Presidents, and Obama and Michelle, as they are really “nice” ” …. what a vocabulary, what an orator…. what a MEHOLE!!!!

    • mayamae says:

      I hope he isn’t really planning on calling him “Obama”, but he’s stupid enough to do it.

  55. SusanneToo says:

    President Obama is conducting his PC. Speaking in complete, coherent paragraphs. Dire to contemplate upcoming press conferences(if any).

  56. mayamae says:

    I understand the desire to impact his ratings, but don’t you have to be a Nielsen family to be counted anyway?

    • Christin says:

      I don’t think so. The Nielsen web site suggests they can collect information from ‘television sets’ as well as paper journals. My understanding is that information is collected as you watch or DVR and watch said DVR programming within 7 days.

      Regarding a question posed upthread — Not sure if Nielsen covers all major countries in terms of global ratings, but it appears they are in several outside the US.

  57. I'mScaredAsHell says:

    Trumpeteers are trying to cause trouble during the inauguration and blame it on progressives:

    Counter-Sting Catches James O’Keefe Network Attempting To Sow Chaos At Trump’s Inauguration

    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/counter-sting-catches-james-okeefe-network-attempting-to-sow-chaos-at-trumps-inauguration_us_5873e26fe4b043ad97e516f7

  58. Sam H x says:

    I think there is some truth to the allegations that were leaked about Donald’s links with Russia. I think the Russians helped him with his finances (didn’t he file for bankruptcy?) in exchange they wanted in with the States and put him in office. He is burning his bridges with the intelligence community, p*ssing off China, insulting a well respected civil rights activist and more than 40 congressmen are boycotting his inauguration.

    I was reading about the senate hearings to vet the individuals who have been picked for Trumps adminstration. Lord what a effing shambles. No one has been vetted properly and the proper back ground/security checks haven’t been done either.

    This De Vos woman might be undoing the good work that Joe Biden has done with regards to combating college campus sexual assaults. She is a billionaire to boot with little experience in the Education sector.

    Bernie Sanders did have a great question for her though. I think it was if you weren’t a billionnaire, do you think you would be here? Lol.

    There was a rather embarrassing story about Donald’s ex wife Martha Maples. She tried to get hair and make up for free for herself and her daughter for the inauguration from a beautician as she no longer receives child support for their daughter Tiffany Trump.

    The woman who recommended the beautician (she turned them down even after discounting it) to Martha had the cheek to threaten the beautician saying that she is messing with the POTUS or some crap like that.

    I would like to wish everyone who is taking part in the Women’s march across the country all the best from across the pond. I hope they go well and smooth as possible. You have my support ✌️ x

  59. Tara says:

    It will be YUGE, I’m sure. :/

  60. maryquitecontrary says:

    Took the day on PTO Friday to attend the Phoenix Inauguration Protest at the Capitol. Marching Saturday with the Phoenix Women’s March.

    Time to take off the gloves, world. Our opponents already did and look what they’ve already done.

    With more of the worse to come.

    This is no time for the corner. Let’s hit the ring and show ‘em how it is DONE.

    THERE IS NO MANDATE.

  61. Trashaddict says:

    Perfect song for the inauguration:
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fEPNHc-W_Js

  62. robyn says:

    How can allies trust America anymore with a corrupt man such as Trump, with his seemingly unwavering support of Russia, at the helm.

  63. Dinah says:

    Karma is about to rain down on the reign of Trump. If (God forbid) Daddy Bush dies OR Daddy Bush and Barbara die on the same day (not uncommon for couples married and in love for decades) that happens to be Inauguration Day, that is an omen of how everything will go wrong for Trump at every turn. Daddy Bush’s death on that day would fully eclipse the inauguration and, out of respect, the post-parties and such would not be attended even if Trump demands they be allowed to go on. When a former president dies, it is understood the country goes into national mourning with the family. Hope this does not happen, but it could happen. Bush will be respected and Trump would be rightfully irrelevant, a delicious coincidence for Trump Haters United.

  64. honeybee blues says:

    I don’t have time to get through all these great comments, so forgive me if I’m repeating this info: For big events in D.C., bus companies must apply for a parking permit. In ’08, 3000 bus permits were issued for Obama. For this Saturday’s protest, 1200 bus permits have been issued. For tomorrow’s inauguration, 200 bus permits have been issued. That is but 7.5% of Obamas’, and only one sixth of the protesters! That’s why I’m truly hoping for great weather in D.C.; if it’s bad, he’ll blame the low turnout on the rain. Let’s hope the sun is shining brightly on all those empty seats tomorrow!

  65. jwoolman says:

    Somebody will undoubtedly make anything the Trumpster writes into something coherent, if he reads it as written. But he has a hard time not going off script. So we shall see what happens. Well, I won’t, since I still plan to be washing my hair at noon tomorrow. Or maybe I’ll fall and can’t get up. Or maybe I’ll need to clean up some kitty upchuck. Stuff happens.