Beyonce announces she’s pregnant with the greatest Instagram ever

Well, this explains why Beyonce has been suspiciously quiet for months. I mean, she’s always quiet when she wants to be quiet, but most of us thought she was plotting another surprise album or something like that. But no! BEYONCE IS KNOCKED UP.

WITH TWINS!!!!!!!!!!!!

And that Instagram is how she announced it. CB and I were just debating what it all meant. I think it’s very obvious that her vagine is a floral bouquet of wonder and all the peasants must get in formation and pray on these BEYSUS TWINS. Amen.

But seriously, Beyonce will one-up your band-aid baby any day of the week. It wasn’t that long ago when we were convinced that Bey and Jay wouldn’t go the distance. But they were plotting the whole time. Twins: the biggest wig snatch of all.

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Photos courtesy of WENN.

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152 Responses to “Beyonce announces she’s pregnant with the greatest Instagram ever”

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  1. Kaiser says:

    I JUST REALIZED SHE WAITED UNTIL BLACK HISTORY MONTH

  2. tracking says:

    Weird pic. She looks like she stripped, then hopped on top of someone’s casket at a funeral. And damn this time, she made sure to show that belly! But here’s hoping she has a smooth pregnancy and all goes well.

    • AG-UK says:

      Ha def looks like a casket with those funeral wreaths 😳

    • VegasSchmagus says:

      So not a Kimye “wall of flowers” production. I applaud her and her restraint. :)

    • SpareRib says:

      Flowers arches are the new thing. Pretty much all the brides for summer 2017 have been asking me for them, as a florist in London. I personally love the flowers (those Icelandic poppies are just too gorgeous) but its a different style to how the US usually goes, so I understand why people might not be getting them.

  3. Amelia says:

    Has it been confirmed it’s twins?
    Just because I initially read it as meaning they’ve been blessed in having two pregnancies – Blue being one, this one being the other.

  4. Aims says:

    I’m shocked ! I thought Blue would be an only child . Congrats to the Carters .

  5. Hannah says:

    Congrats to Bey!
    Another two kids with whom North West won’t be playing with.

  6. Mei says:

    I bet the resident Pumpkin will get all up in a twitter rage if this eclipses any of his executive order BS.

    So good for them! If anyone else tried to announce a pregnancy this way there would be a whole lot of side-eye for such a gratuitous post. I do wonder how much time and effort they spent on this shoot, she does look like a (beautiful) mannequin.

    • Lightpurple says:

      He will probably be angry that this upstaged his acknowledgment that there is a Black History Month – he sat with Ben Carson and everything! – but he has bigger problems with Susan Collins and Lisa Murkowski turning on DeVoes. Pence will have to leave his side for a few minutes to go vote and who’ll help him with the binders and pens while he’s gone?

      • Mei says:

        Don’t worry, he’ll have Sean Spicer and together they totally know who Fredrick Douglass is, okay?

    • CatFoodJunkie says:

      I agree with the upthread posters that this is an unseemly pic – Beyoncé or not. You BET they had Some fertilization help — or there’s a shocking, not-so-coincidental number of twins born to celebs.

      • Fiorella says:

        Cat food j lo Mariah Julia Roberts , Angelina are some celeb twin moms and they were all over 30 when they got pregnant. As was I When I got pregnant with my twins. Had 3 singletons already. The older you are the more and faster your body spits out the eggs (getting rid of them for menopause) tmi? Anyways in beys case likely there was help just because it seems they have had miscarriages or maybe just one and maybe trouble conceiving

  7. Scar says:

    OMG!!!! I am beyond snatched. This queen just snatched my wig from my skill and left me edgeless and bald. How dare you Beyoncé?! How dare you just drop that photo from nowhere?! Bitch what about my Coachella tickets?!. Slayyyyyyyyy
    OH God you guys I think I’m gonna die from happiness. This bitch just kicked off the black history month with this. It’s like she smelled the gloom and decided to bless my ugly cold heart. Bitch just kdbxkjjxnnjjxndgjdndvdjd I’m really gonna die you guys. Beyoncé just blessed my month. oh God.
    on a more serious note, this is how to do it, you work on your marriage before having another baby. band-aid babies do more harm than good. I bet Blue is elated
    any takes on the names. I’m thinking Brooklyn and Houston. or

  8. Leslieknop says:

    I’m so happy for them

    However, if it wasn’t Beyoncé in the photo this would be in a “bad maternity pictures” click bait article

  9. Jenns says:

    So Orange Cheeto is president and Beyonce is pregnant with twins? The day after the election, she knew what she needed to do. . BEYONCE’S TWINS WILL SAVE US!

  10. KiddVicious says:

    Congratulations!

    Why blue panties and pink-ish bra? Boy and girl?????

    • Ange says:

      Oooh maybe! I was theorising this morning it would be boy/girl twins (as we know all these celebrities aren’t having twins naturally so why not choose?) and now you’ve made me wonder even more….

    • Otaku Fairy says:

      Maybe. I didn’t think of that.

    • Jess says:

      Good call, I didn’t think about that! Now I’m scared the weird funeral arrangements might be in honor of one she lost and I feel like a jerk for my earlier comments!

    • TheSageM says:

      All I can think of when I see that picture is “couldn’t she find a matching set?”

  11. Bahare says:

    Hopefully things will go well and it’s nice to get good news. But does anyone think that the reveal timing has anything to do with the upcoming grammys?

  12. Crox says:

    Congrats! And a lovely pic.

    Do you think this is the reason why Kim K is posting messages about trying to get pregnant?

    • dodgy says:

      Wait, what? Not that I want to think about Ms Kardashian West’s womb but… didn’t she hate being pregnant? Twice?

    • Kent says:

      @ BAHARE The voting period for the Grammys has already ended weeks ago which means the winners are already decided and I don’t think she will purposely get pregnant just because of an award she’s won twenty times.

    • VegasSchmagus says:

      I don’t think she’ll get pregnant again. She spent SOOO much money on plastic surgery after Saint…..

  13. Matahari says:

    Greatest Instagram EVER? Really? It’s awkward and tacky to me.

  14. Brandi says:

    I don’t even follow Beyonce but I love this pic. I think it is glorious and beautiful and looks like a dream!!

  15. Rapunzel says:

    Cue pillow baby theorists. If the Clooney’s have twins too, this will be a celebrity baby twin off.

    • Gene123 says:

      Ugh, I want nothing more than a twin off to distract me from politics

    • Godwina says:

      Ugh. How cruelly stupid that crap is–denying the parentage of someone’s child FOR SPORT. Let’s hope those people went back under their f*cking bridges.

  16. Guesto says:

    I don’t get it. Why is she so special?

    Good for her, I guess, but that instagram pic is all shades of tacky, and if anyone else had announced a pregnancy with the same pic, they’d have been roundly and quite rightly eye-rolled on here.

    • Scar says:

      Uhmmmm she’s special cos she’s Beyoncé: a hardworking and talented woman who minds her business and is always nice. Damn girl let her leave. any other pic but that one and you’d be accusing her of faking her pregnancy and trying to be too perfect. Chica posted the most relatable photo and you still find a problem with it.
      Where’s your “congratulations ” at least have the grace to offer von grays before asking why she’s special and well liked.
      I know this is celebitchy but it’s comments like this and those other ones on the Jennifer Aniston, Duchess Kate, Gwyneth paltrow and K-Stew’s threads that make me stay the hell away

      • whyme says:

        I’m with you Scar +1,000

        If the celeb isn’t President Cheeto, Woody Allen, Casey Affleck, Roman Polanski, Mel Gibson or Nate Parker, etc. (you get the picture) I say no need to be negative and rip them apart.

      • frisbee says:

        Not everybody is a Stan and they are just as entitled to express their opinion as those who are, nobody is being ‘ripped to pieces’ her, just expressing confusion at the blind adoration they do not share.

      • African Sun says:

        @Scar, THIS. Glad you wrote this, there always has to be one Debbie Downer on a Hive post. So happy for her <3

      • CorruptLobbyist says:

        @scar

        “Chica posted the most relatable photo” Seriously? This 1987 glamour shot from hell is a relatable photo? Huh. To each their own because I think it’s ridiculous. Like something Courtney Stodden would post.

    • Agnes's Mom says:

      I so agree with you. I don’t get why she is special. She sounds like a caterwaller hitting high notes, and the melody never seems to go with the words to her songs. Her dancing and choreography aren’t usually special, not knocking her, I just don’t get it. I hope she has a healthy preganancy. I just don’t understand this being the end all-be all for some people. To each their own, I suppose.

    • Anett says:

      Guesto
      +1

    • Pandy says:

      Another Debbie Downer. I don’t get the adulation for her either. Too much narcissism for me. But these are some SERIOUSLY TACKY photos lollll. She should be embarrassed really.

  17. Snowpea says:

    That pic is straight outta some crazy 1990′s shot done in a suburban photo studio. WTAF? Plus since nobody believed she was preggers last time, she’s gone all out to show that belly (which actually looks preggers for reals IMHO).

    • Peeking in says:

      There were pics of her belly last time, though. People chose to ignore them. Like the one at the beach where she was wearing a bikini.

      • artistsnow says:

        She ARCHED her back at the beach and was on steroids. And it was the ONLY photo.

        IF Beyonce managed to grow her babies in her belly this time, that is fantastic for her. But IF she is LYING to us again…..that’s a horse of a different color.

        She LOOKS pregnant, so for now, I am going to believe her words. Congrats Bey!!

      • Hellnaw says:

        Pleased for Beyonce and her family. Can’t believe there are people still running around with that crazy fake pregnancy theory when there are pictures and footage of pregnant Beyonce. People like @artistsnow say she was on steroids to look pregnant. I’ve had courses of oral steroids as a last resort and steroid bloat does not make you look like this: https://goo.gl/PQaaY. You get moon face and an unhealthy puffiness. It’s also very risky to be on this medication with its myriad side-effects. It does not make sense that Beyonce would take serious medical risks to avoid pregnancy for vanity’s sake, and go on to take medication that…distorts her body. The woman carried her first baby to full term while you were busy with your bizarre fanfic. She’s having two more. Good for her!

      • Mimz says:

        @peeking in i know right? People will scream PHOTOSHOP bc beyonce is the devil.

        @Artistsnow FYI in her lemonade mini movie in the “all night long” bit there is a home video footage fully frontal big ass 9 month pregnant belly Beyonce Knowles-Carter. And before you ask I know editing and photoshop when i see it.

        And it was a freaking DRESS that folded weirdly.

        She might be annoying with the media control thing she does but… faking 2 pregnancies?😵

        It always amazes me how people will really give in to this Beyonce-is-a-fake-pregnancy-master conspiracy. You are allowed not to like her but just think about this for two seconds:DOES IT MAKE SENSE TO YOU?

        Smh

    • Peeking in says:

      Arched her back and was on steroids? 🤣🤣🤣 STAHP! Actually there was more than one photo from that day.

    • lemonbow says:

      Congrats to any woman who is expecting but I agree, that photo is so embarrassing. And I DO believe she faked her last pregnancy. If it was for fertility reasons, which I am inclined to believe now that she is having twins, then I feel sorry for her but the whole facade was almost as embarrassing as this photo. I could eat a cheeseburger and puff out my stomach and look more “pregnant” than her on that beach shoot hah.

  18. Jayna says:

    Good for them. Great pic.

    Bul Pharrell and his wife Helen triple-upped everybody. Helen had triplets a few days ago. Now, that’s a big deal. I can’t even imagine having triplets.

    • Otaku Fairy says:

      The thought of giving birth to triplets- especially as a first pregnancy- that’s something I’d hope to not go through.

  19. Jess says:

    That picture is so awful that it’s amazing! I can’t make sense of it, the mismatched lingerie, the green veil, and just throw some funeral arrangements in there, yeah! Good for them though, twins! Crazy.

    • Madpoe says:

      Thank you! I was beginning to think I was the only one that the pix screamed funeral arrangements there.

    • Molly says:

      My thoughts exactly. It’s insane and I’m HERE FOR ALL OF IT. Congrats, Carters!

    • LadyT says:

      Yes. And not even a fresh or well-designed funeral arrangement at that. Just a hodgepodge of leftover flowers and greenery.

      • SpareRib says:

        Its so eyeopening to read the average Americans take on flowers. These flowers are beautiful, the arch is so on trend too. Yet people still seems to just want tightly packed roses, no foliage, looking totally unnatural because thats what they see at Walmart and think is floristry. Gross.

    • TheOtherOne says:

      Cemetery glam

  20. Moneypenny says:

    Happy for them. I saw her last tour and really seems very sweet. Blue and my daughter are 2 months apart and now my future daughter and twinsies will be months apart!

    I assume the whole “the world is ending, Emperor Cheeto is Satan incarnate” thing influences this being the greatest Instagram ever.

  21. Lightpurple says:

    Red Wine and Green Hornet

  22. Bee says:

    This might just go down as the tackiest Instagram ever. Congrats and all, but sheesh, the visuals are just so…..ugh. I’m enjoying the fact that clearly so much effort went into the creation of this “masterpiece”. It’ll be remembered, I’ll give them that!

  23. reg says:

    They pulled the frozen sperm from freezer and found another surrogate…

  24. Lucy says:

    Personally, I am more than 100% okay with Beyoncé reproducing. And that picture is absolutely wonderful, in all its…eccentricity, let’s say. Congrats to her and Jay!!!

  25. Hehehe says:

    She looks content

  26. Jenny says:

    Happy for them, but can’t help but think that that is truly the ugliest pregnancy announcement photo ever. Why would you do that to not only yourself but your poor unborn kid/s/? Maybe it’s just my haughty European sensibilities who are offended at all the funeral-like flowers surrounding her growing womb? ;-)

  27. Ayra. says:

    Y’all know that Wendy Williams gif where she pulls off her wig in an excessively dramatic fashion? That was me. I was so snatched. I honestly did not expect it, let alone TWINS.

  28. Slowsnow says:

    Virgin Mary on acid. This is the ugliest thing I have ever seen to announce babies.
    I love it.

  29. Chinoiserie says:

    The lingerie is a bit strange choice since the babies will see this one day presumably. And the flowers look a little funeral type like some have said. But I still like the photo and expecially the veil.

    • Otaku Fairy says:

      I don’t think that would be any type of problem for those babies, since they’ll see her and millions of other women in bikinis at beaches throughout their childhoods and adulthoods too.

  30. Shambles says:

    Weyyuuuulll….
    I’m glad they got their shit together, I guess. Good for them. That photo is ridiculous, like… I am the Virgin Mother levels of ridiculousness… but it’s Beyoncé, so whatever.

  31. kimbers says:

    Wow that is a hilarious picture….the styling was so dollarstore i love it…we’ve all had to make a dollar store gift bag look like a million bucks . . Bey is no different…she even has our stretch mark thighs ladies! =]

  32. kri says:

    You do you,Bey cause NO ONE else can. All blessings to you and yr family. SHE MADE LEMONADE,PEOPLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  33. kri says:

    Also that pic,color scheme,flowers and outfit colors are in the vid for Formation…

  34. Paisley says:

    I am so very happy and excited! Can’t think of any better news than this, and to have twins! I’ll be looking every day for updates. The pic she posted is so beautiful. It’s the prettiest picture I have ever seen of a celebrity. She is just the most perfect person I can think of. Wonder what beautiful names they will call their children. Congrats!!

  35. Sorrynotsorry, but I always find it selfish when people bring babies into already-unstable relationships. It’s not fair to the children.

  36. xo says:

    Congratulations to them. She is off her game with that photo, though. It’s ridiculous.

  37. Jeesie says:

    Well, she managed to be even tackier with this announcement than her first, so that’s something.

  38. Bee says:

    Isn’t this where y’all come in and say it’s a fake belly?

  39. lemonbow says:

    oh no stop stop stop!!!! Like Beyonce, be happy that she’s having a baby, thrilled that she is having twins! But no one with eyeballs can defend that horrid photo! It’s like a funeral from the 70s and what on earth is that veil??? oh no no no no.

  40. Zuzus Girl says:

    Butt ugly photo but happy for them. Hoping for a happy, healthy baby.

  41. Rina says:

    Congratulations to Beyonce, Jay Z, and little Blue!

  42. teacakes says:

    This is great.

    And double kudos to her for lining the announcement up with Black History Month!

  43. Pussycat says:

    Reminds me of the Empress in some very colorful versions of the tarot cards. I also think she ‘s trying to resemble Boticelli’s art (unsuccessfully). I agree that is kinda Walmart chic though.

  44. Katherine says:

    Every time a celeb has “twins” I’m like oh, they bought a special designer baby set.

    Every single celeb with twins went to a special doctor. Duh they did some in vitro bullshit so they could pick and choose.

    Just no. Not a fan.

  45. Jade says:

    Congratulations Beyonce and family. The photo may be tacky at first but I’m very sure she purposely shot it this way and there’s gonna be some ahhhhhh moment after you figure it out ahhah. Suspect it’s full of symbolism for her and her fans like to decipher them. I’ll join in. There’s blue and the flowers for Blue Ivy. There’s a green veil. Maybe next kid’s name is Jade Carter? Brown bra hmmm…the other kid’s name is Wonder Brown Carter? Or she just likes to mess with us.

  46. Libra girl says:

    The first thing I saw was funeral flowers…geez that’s not good.

  47. Lucy2 says:

    That photo is full on crazy, but congrats to them!

  48. Nimbolicious says:

    Mondo bizarro. But we’re obviously in the End Times, so why the hell not……

  49. Kris says:

    What amuses me most about this is, if that rumour about Amal Clooney being pregnant with twins is actually true, she just stole all the thunder. I bet Amal is FUMING right now.

  50. KateBush says:

    What’s with the green veil I don’t get it?

  51. Gobo says:

    Kinda reminds me of a Frida Kahlo piece.

  52. Rico Shew says:

    I don’t get the hype.

  53. Courtney says:

    twins get more common as the parents get older Bey is 35 and Jay Z is in his late 40′s. using assistance to conceive if necessary doesn’t diminish the blessing. the photo looks like an Olin Mills photo that would be done at a department store. my family has one of me as a toddler in a green velvet holiday dress with red holly berries at the neckline

  54. Dolphin7 says:

    Congrats Bey!!!
    Also, did anyone see the twitter reaction of someone hoping it’s not a coincidence and Beyoncé is carrying the last Jedi twins?! Happy for their family and for getting some good news!!!

  55. Heat says:

    My first, cynical, thought was: She chose to announce her pregnancy this way so that we can all see that it isn’t a pillow-baby…this time!

    • Fiorella says:

      Oh me too! Exactly that

    • ash says:

      RIGHT … THIS

      like so she’s taking this micromanagement of image into 2017 yal…. no direct interviews, post-lemonade world, cryptic pics—- sooo mysterious soooo intriguing… Congratz nonetheless

  56. Skeptic says:

    The picture is ridiculous – it looks like it could be a parody. And twins? Girl and Boy? Test tube designer babies for sure.

  57. I Choose Me says:

    That picture amuses my soul. Awright Beyonce, you may just make a full convert out of me yet. Stay extra you fabulous queen you.

  58. Mimz says:

    I opened ig last night moments after she posted and i had to do a double take! So happy for her. Personally i never doubted her first pregnancy and besides, theres full frontal of footage in her lemonade video with her in the latest stages of pregnancy with blue. And im not a stan. I admire her and she also annoys me at times. But i will never knock down a woman that works as hard as she does and yes, makes millions. She can be extra all she wants. She can do this kitsch nonsense in her photoshoots. I’ve never heard anyone say shes a horrible human being or whatever. Let her be.

    I didnt like the photo that much at first but now i appreciate the whole concept (see full photoshoot) and video.

    Regarding her exploitation of her personal life for PR reasons… newsflash… most people in that business does it.. she just happens to do it better than most.

    And here i was wondering why she was MIA during the march and the past few months. Anyway. Congrates Bey Giselle !!

  59. hogtowngooner says:

    Great news for her and her family, but that pic is absurd.