People Magazine’s latest cover looks like a joke someone cooked up to promote Ed Hardy T-Shirts as the fashion of choice for absent, cheating fathers trying to recapture their lost college years. People doesn’t yet have a story on their website to go along with this ridiculous cover, which shows Jon Gosselin, 32, and his 22 year-old girlfriend, Hailey Glassman, smiling with the words “Divorce To Dating in 20 Days!” It looks like a how-to guide for dads hoping to escape the daily grind and run away with an undemanding party girl. People usually promotes their cover story with some kind of teaser article online, but they’re not doing that in this case. It’s almost as if they’re ashamed of this issue. All that we see on People’s website at this point is a small little ad at the bottom of the articles which says “Jon Gosselin talks to People about his shocking affair. All the details about his new girlfriend following his split from Kate.”

Other outlets have some of the content of the article, though, and it will include Jon’s quote that we covered yesterday about how he’s just “a regular guy… going through a very difficult time.” He also says a little something about how his relationship with Hailey developed and makes a veiled reference to how his wife tried to control him. Here’s the full quote, which is a little longer than the excerpt we already posted:

“Hailey and I have been family friends for several years and only very recently began dating. What began as friendship has grown into something more. I genuinely enjoy spending time with her. It’s nice to be with someone who I can confide in and trust and who accepts me for who I am. I know that my decision to appear publicly with Hailey this weekend will be scrutinized, but I hope that people can see I’m a regular guy who is going through a very difficult time in [my] life and wants to move forward.”

[From Cover Awards]

Oh snap! “It’s nice to be with someone who I can confide in and trust and who accepts me for who I am.” Remember how the psychologist quoted in yesterday’s ABC News coverage said that Jon stepping out with Hailey right away looked like “revenge, a fairly hostile act,” and that it seemed like “some sort of a declaration and the person in the marriage felt emasculated”? It looks like the therapist was right since Jon is emphasizing how he can talk to Hailey and she “accepts” him. Of course he can talk to her – she’s 22 years old, doesn’t have a job that we know of, and doesn’t yet have any kids. I doubt she even cooks or cleans up after herself. She has plenty of time to hang out with him, listen to his stupid complaints and do whatever he wants.

As for those engagement rumors that are set to grace the upcoming issue of In Touch, Jon says they’re not true, but at least one person quoted in People refers to Hailey as his “fiance”:

One member of the Ed Hardy posse told People he referred to Hailey as Jon’s fiancée, while Audigier proclaims, “This guy is in love. No question about it.”

However, Jon denies any engagement plans to the mag, “No. We’re just having a cool time and enjoying each other.”

That cool time has sadly come to an end for now. Jon told photographers Hailey is staying in France while he had to come back to the States last night in order to “work” (i.e., spend time with his family for the cameras).

[From E! Online]

As Jaybird pointed out, Hailey was sporting a ring on her left ring finger at the airport. It’s possible Jon bought it for her but that it’s not an engagement ring exactly. This man is a fool, but he’s not stupid. He’s going to continue to cash in on his long-expired 15 minutes with every chance he gets. People are the real losers here. They would have been better off running a competing Khloe Kardashian weight loss cover.