Singer Halsey was honored over the weekend at the Ending Youth Homelessness: A Benefit For My Friend’s Place. Halsey is a big advocate for homeless youth and has donated large amounts of time, energy and money towards the cause. The reason is because she knows what it feels like, having been a homeless teenager herself. Halsey’s been open for years about being kicked out of her parents’ house when she dropped out of community college. At the time, she had no health insurance and no phone. When she ran out of couches to crash on, she’d either find shelter or buy a four-pack of Red Bull to keep her up for three days because it was safer than sleeping on the street. During her acceptance speech last Saturday, she explained that she’d consider just about anything to feed herself, and that included sex work.
Halsey may be a Grammy-nominated singer now, but the star’s rise to fame was no easy feat.
The “Without Me” singer, 24, got candid on Saturday about the years she spent living as a homeless teen in New York City, and revealed she once considered having sex for money in order to put food on the table.
“When I was living in New York, I was a teenager. My friends were picking out decorations for their dorms, and I was debating on whether or not I should let a stranger inside me so I could pay for my next meal,” Halsey said, while being honored at Ending Youth Homelessness: A Benefit For My Friend’s Place in Hollywood.
“It wasn’t because I did something bad, it wasn’t because something was wrong with me, and it wasn’t because my parents didn’t love me, ‘cause they did, very much,” she added, citing a “series of unfortunate circumstances” as the reason she ended up in her position.
During the singer’s speech, she also recalled the moment she secured her first record deal, and had to tell a label employee she was living out of a bag.
“I had one demo in my pocket, and I was carrying a gray duffel bag. Sat down in his cubicle at the time. And he asked me, ‘What’s in the bag?’ And I looked at him dead in the eyes and I said, ‘This is my house,’” Halsey told the crowd.
There’s nothing wrong with willingly entering sex work, of course. But it can be a very dangerous line of work if there is no legal protection. As a scared, hungry, desperate 19-year-old teenager, the likelihood is Halsey would have been harmed, possibly killed. I read a few interviews with Halsey as background for writing this and she never really explained about her parents kicking her out beyond, “they just didn’t agree with a lot of things about me.” However, she also said her home was “chaotic” and they hadn’t spoken for a year and a half before she got her record deal. So whatever the situation was, even though she said in her speech that her parents loved her very much, the rift was enough for her to call a grey duffel bag home and resort to any means necessary rather than mend fences with her folks. It must have been terrifying and lonely.
I’ve been thinking about the plight of the homeless finding gainful employment since I watched this video. I don’t have any answers, but I want to find some because it’s true, so many homeless want to get back on their feet but our system isn’t built for that. No phone, no address = no work, it’s a viscous cycle. Halsey said her career came out of a chance meeting at a party in a Holiday Inn room that led to her recording Ghost and uploading it to SoundCloud. Obviously, she’s incredibly lucky to have survived the streets with her life and now a thriving career. I really appreciate that she is taking none of that for granted and working so hard for others who suffered her same fate. She deserves to be recognized for both her candor and her crusade.
Halsey, who is bisexual, was recognized by GLAAD at their 2018 Media Awards for her advocacy for LGBTQ homeless youth. Halsey doesn’t have a foundation you can donate to yet, but Cyndi Lauper’s True Color Fund is working against this problem as well, if you are looking to contribute.
Photo credit: WENN Photos
Weird story, seems like it was her choice to live on the street. Is it even possible to kick your child out?… In my country, a child has a right to the house/territory, where he is registered as his address.
In the US you are considered an adult at age 18. Parents are free to kick their kids out at that age. I don’t think Halsey chose to live on the street. She had no money for a down payment and first and last month’s rent, which is what most apartment leases require.
Minors get kicked out of their houses all the time and parents often don’t face consequences. Many “choose” to live on the street because group homes (where most older kids and kids with mental illnesses get placed in my area) are sometimes violent and dangerous. I had a friend from foster care in high school; she told me that some group homes are really nice and some are essentially prisons. You never really know where you’ll get placed. Especially since Halsey is a queer woman, she might’ve been scared of ending up in one of those places. Lots of kids choose to live on the street rather than foster care or a group home because it’s safer. We don’t do right by so many parentless kids.
https://www.thestar.com/news/canada/2016/03/14/two-teens-harrowing-stories-of-ontario-group-homes.html
https://www.bostonglobe.com/metro/2017/12/18/federal-audit-uncovers-unsafe-and-unsanitary-conditions-group-homes-for-foster-children/HxaFR0eqhIYQpyjfeU1iEN/story.html
I think she may have been 18 or 19 at the time, so at that age, her parents could legally kick her out for any reason. Homelessness isn’t really a choice when you’re that young and don’t have a good career/ can immediately just buy a home or rent an apartment.
Also what I mean is that the child has a claim to the property he is registered in. Like, doesn’t matter if I’m old, my name is registered to that flat, and no one can forbid me to come back if I like. Guess in US it’s different.
@lana – interesting. In the US, you would never put a child on a lease (renting a place) or a mortgage (buying a place). I suppose you COULD, but it would be very out of the ordinary and an adult would still have to be on there. You wouldn’t add a child once they turned 18 either. Again, you could but it would be unordinary. So, a 19 year old would be living at “their” house at the permission of their parents. And I guess in some states a child would have rights to the home…but how would they go about proving it/getting the parents to let them come back with no resources?
It’s a great cause to work for. She had a pretty rough youth, I guess. “Dating” a 24 year old at 17, getting into drugs after a bipolar diagnosis (her mother is also bipolar). Dropped out of university and community college due to financial hardships… I believe she was kicked out after dropping out of community college.
I don’t know what I’d do as a parent. Honestly – it’s an awful situation I hope never to be in. But it’s an entirely different thing if they have a job that can help them get an apartment or something. But at the same time… she had younger brothers, and I suspect that maybe the dropping out of the second school was the last straw. Doesn’t make it ‘right’ or anything, but I also can see how people just feel like they’re at the end of their rope and need to protect younger siblings. Who knows though. Her parents could have just as easily been garbage. But there’s a point where you can try to save/protect someone over and over again and when you’re the only one trying I can see how it’d be exhausting. There’s a big difference in age as well… a 19 year old is a lot more equipped to live on their own (plenty do after highschool) than a 15 or 16 year old ever would be equipped to deal with.
I don’t shame her for considering sex work though. She clearly felt that was her only choice, and thankfully she was going to do it ‘willingly’ and not because someone was forcing her to. It’s such a dangerous line of work – I will never be able to comprehend the level of strength these women and men have. But it makes me so nervous for teens. I know I live in a really small town in NS. But recently there’s been a few cases of girls going to Alberta and getting forced into sex work. There’s been guys in the province who will troll for teens and ultimately, the girls tend to disappear, or be killed in an ‘accident’ – it’s just SO horrific, and it’s something our community only really had to start being affected by recently. But who knows how many had ‘run away’ before and ended up in the same circumstances. The parents did what they could, but by the time they’d found out, there really wasn’t much they could do. The kids were either too old, or in too deep.
There are, however, plenty of people who will disown their kids because of their sexuality and those people genuinely need to go rot.
“There are, however, plenty of people who will disown their kids because of their sexuality…” This. When a person is young, has little to no work experience, and no real income of their own, it’s easy for older relatives to try to use that situation to try to control them in ways they shouldn’t. Not saying that this is what happened with Halsey, but it’s an important thing to keep in mind.
Absolutely. There are a lot of people out there who are either ill-equipped by circumstance or willfully so raising kids, and it’s a shame. I’m really happy that she’s specifically working to help LGBTQ homeless youth because it’s just so absolutely heart breaking. I can’t imagine having a child and choosing to disown them because of something like who they love. There are so many people out there who would give anything to have children, and then there are always people who disown their kids for this kind of thing. It’s absolutely disgusting.
That’s so true. Outside of sexual orientation, teenagers can be real shits and a lot of parents don’t know how to handle them. My brother was super disrespectful and disruptive in our home, lazy, thought he knew everything. I often wished my parents would throw his ass out but they never did. I thought he was just being a jerk but later he turned out to have a mental health diagnosis.
It’s hard and as a family we’ve kept him from homeslessness over the years as his condition has progressed. A LOT of addicts and homeless people have mental health issues. I wish we had more community and medical support.
Her bipolar disorder was probably a factor. In my opinion, her parents should have gotten her some help. She tried to kill herself a year or two before her parents kicked her out, which was what prompted her diagnosis. It takes longer than a year or two to learn how to manage your mental illness, and parents aren’t understanding when what they see as a basic thing isn’t accomplished by their mentally ill child because everything is so much more difficult with a mental illness.
You gotta get your kids help while they’re still legally under your control. It’s incredibly difficult for everyone involved but mentally ill teenagers who never learned management strategies almost always end up falling into the same pattern that Halsey did. I was definitely there at one point and my parents were in complete denial. Luckily, I had someone who understood what was going on and got me back on track. Unfortunately, she didn’t have anyone with the knowledge and motivation to do that for her. I’m glad things turned out ok, but she’s the exception not the rule.
From what I’ve heard about Halsey, she made some bad choices as a teen (drugs, who she was surrounding herself with, dropping out of school, etc.). At some point, it sounds like her parents said “if you’re going to continue to make crappy life choices, you can’t make them here.” That she ended up rich and famous makes her the exception, not the rule.
Yeah, it wasn’t so much that they kicked her out, it was more she chose to leave rather than try to sober up. She stayed with friends after that, and a few brief rough periods seem to have been because she was just too out of it to think about going to a friends or going home.
She’s already had to walk back stories about being kicked out and homeless once. I’m surprised she’s bringing it up again.
She had a huge Tumblr blog back in the day before she got famous. She was obsessed with one direction and hated that Harry Styles and Taylor Swift were dating, she wrote a song about how gross ‘haylor’ was. She was born pretty upper middle class, had a rift with her parents, moved out, and stayed with her other wealthy friends. She likes to rewrite her history but people on the internet won’t forget.
Yep. I’m still on tumblr and people still talk about this. She is a narcissist who will say anything for attention. She is lying about her past to seem like she struggled, and that’s not the case at all.
Yep. Came here to say ALL of THISSSS
I knew this about her and was wondering how that story fit in to this one. I still think it can be true – even your wealthy friends will get sick of you on their couch. Still. She’s had a crazy life.
ohhhh! what?! I didn’t know this! tell us mooore
She was exposed again and again but most people are not in these circles and end up falling for her bull every time.
Yup, came here for this. I was very active on tumblr at the same time she was and in my own pathetic way a bit tumblr famous lol and she really likes to rewrite her life and cry victim. I’m glad she found her way and found success but I can’t stand the constant lying. No one will forget what she really was like.
Sex work to eat isn’t really a choice, and it’s one of many reasons why I would never judge a worker.
The scum that take advantage of someone desperate for money, willing to sleep with someone who doesn’t want to, but needs to for survival, different story.
+1 and one of the many reasons I despise Robert Kraft.
“There is nothing wrong with willingly entering sex work, of course.” Except for the vast majority of people in that line of business, it’s not WILLINGLY – it’s an act of desperation because they don’t have other options. Either they are forced or they are desperate. I’m really uncomfortable normalizing something that is almost always associated with tragedy.
This. This is not about slut-shaming; having sex willingly and happily is one thing, but having sex to eat (or put another way, being forced into it by circumstances) is something else altogether.
I’m uncomfortable with the role that stigma around sex workers- and female sex workers in particular- has played in both the way sex workers are treated and the way women and girls are treated period. A small minority of feminists and liberals being extra kind in their word choices is not even a real problem.
I packed me a bag with my things at 18 and left home. I just felt ready to jump and “fly off the nest”, it was almost instinct. It was shocking to be out there in the world, 5 states away from home, alone and it was swim or sink. I couldn’t go back home, i was 18 and my mom was raising my younger siblings as a single parent; I couldn’t do that to her. I let her know i was safe and didn’t talk to her again until a year later. By then i was working as a blingual receptionist at a tire store and renting a bedroom from a lady who had a big house. But before i got that break It was very scary, had to hustle and do a lot of knocking on doors to get odd jobs, offering language lessons that paid near to nothing (i was a young girl, had no official teaching degree or experience) just to afford food and public transportation. I walked most of the time and learned how to keep myself safe and be somewhat “invisible”. I think my saving grace was being bilingual, being at the right place and at the right time for an interview. I got hired on the spot for the receptionist position and i felt like i had just hit the jackpot, never been happier to get a job. Sex work in my mind was the very last resort and a line i never felt ready to cross although there were plenty of propositions. I just couldn’t get myself to do it and thankfully those who offered it never got violent or forced me. I tried drugs once but instead of a high my chest started hurting and i thought i was having a heart attack. To this day i avoid even prescription medicine like a plague. One night i crawled in a space at a hospital parking garage to sleep for the night. I heard a guy talking on a cell inside a car parked next to where i was, he was explaining to whomever he was talking to that he had just been released from prison and he was spending the night where he had parked and then leaving town. He sounded like a really rough dude and i kept shaking in fear and holding my breath hoping he wouldn’t discover me crawled in that space. I feared about what he’d do to me if he found me; one of the scariest moments of my life. I’m all for my kids to go out into the world and learn to fly by themselves but as they approach that age of “flying solo” we’re working on getting them a plan, a back up plan and i’ve told them my “adventures” and how friggin lucky i am to still be alive. I’ve told them no matter what, if their plans tank, they can always come back home and we’ll figure it out. I don’t want them to go through unnecessary hard times, risks and fears. Life out there is like entering the mouth of a wolf even when you have a plan under your belt. I guess it was luck, a hell of a guardian angel (poor thing must have aged in dog years watching my back) and just working every day to get on my feet. I’m thankful for the experience and i think it changed my perspective on homelessness, helped me as a parent and appreciating everything i have today including my hubby. He was hustling at a young age too. Our stories have a lot of similarities and that brought us and keeps us together. We never take for granted having a safe place to sleep in and the pride of having come out the other side in one piece, being a productive part of society.
But why did it have to be so dramatic?.. why not just find job in the same town, leave with mom and give her part of the salary to make her life easier? Or same state at least
I’m confused — how would moving back home with your single-parent mother “do that to her”? I would imagine she’d have been glad of the help, to be frank, assuming you were helpful around the house.
The perfect marriage of capitalism and patriarchy, it is so telling neoliberalism has rewritten the narrative.
My family was homeless for a time when I was a little girl. My mother was a single parent who lost her job and then we lost our house. And her family (i.e, my grandmother and her siblings) were unwilling to help. So my mother couch surfed with two small children. We slept in hallways. I don’t remember much about that time but I do remember that. Homelessness is the cause that is dearest to my heart because I understand how easy it can be to fall into. You dont have to be a runaway teen or a drug addict or mentally ill for it to happen to you. It can happen simply from a series of unfortunate events. And it’s not as easy as simply pulling yourself up by your bootstraps. Our systems are designed to essentially KEEP people homeless. You cant find a job without an address and you can’t get an address without a job. My mother was blessed because this happened to us in the 80’s when Section 8 eas really just starting and we were able to get an apartment despite my mom not having a job. And it was getting that apartment that allowed my mom to be able to find a job.
Yes, once you are homeless it takes a hell of a lot of effort to get yourself out of that hole. It’s like falling out of grace from society, that’s how i felt when i was there.
I don’t listen to Halsey’s music, but I know she attended the high school right by our house (Go Streaks!) and even went on to shoot one of her music videos there. Until someone proves otherwise, I believe that we prob live in her old house. That’s all I have. 🤷♀️
Ugh, she’s such a liar.
I wonder what marginalised identity she’s going to co-opt, sorry “identify as” next.
She is half black and she is bisexual. She has also struggled with mental illness and a year or two ago detailed her history of abuse. She is also extra, thirsty, and young. The point is that flawed, annoying, messy people come from all backgrounds. If so-called ‘allies’ can’t deal with that reality without dismissing the ones they dislike/can’t take seriously as lying about their race, sexual orientation, abuse, etc., then that ‘ally’ is dehumanizing the community they’re claiming to want to help.
So true. These purity tests are exhausting.
Amen.
There is no such thing as a perfect victim. That does not stop them from being a victim.
It’s so much information that I can’t have an opinion about her. I also wonder if drug abuse can leave parmanent damage on a mentally ill person (one of the reasons I never tried).
I don’t believe a word that comes out of her mouth. Used to follow her and think she was precious. Drama and narcissistic to the fullest. Loves to rewrite her own history and play martyr. Love her voice but the rest I can do without. There are much better female artists out there to follow. 🤷♀️
There are actual artists with real interesting backgrounds making cool music. Halsey fancies herself among them, but she’s just not. Kudos to her PR team. And I appreciate her donation to this cause, but it feels like part of her myth-making.
I just love her and her music. She is hella talented. I wish her all the best in her endeavors and I hope she is as happy (or will be) as she deserves to be. Cheers.
It sounds like she was a handful as a teen. I don’t know if her parents kicked her out because dropping out of college was the last straw after drug abuse, dating an older person (or based on the comments here), and having bipolar disorder. She also identifies as bisexual which her parents may have disapproved of. But it does seem she isn’t proud of that period in her life which is why she may be hazy on the details of why she actually got kicked out. Well she’s made something of herself now, hopefully she has a better relationship with her family.
I just find her so painful and boring. Hopefully she isn’t around long. Almost like a less interesting Pink.
Yes, kids get kicked out all the time under 18, under 16.
I grew up in a strict church and I knew a bunch of kids that we’re out and living on the streets.
For sexuality, but also if they didn’t believe the same way.
I knew more than one kid who didn’t buy into the religion the same way, they still believed but they questioned. That’s not allowed.
If you have younger siblings your a corrupting influence.
The two kids I’m thinking of, one was 15 one was almost 17. BECAUSE they QUESTIONED parts of the church doctrine.
Then there were a bunch booted because they were gay, or perceived to be gay aged 15, 16, 17.
So oh yeah it happened. This was on the 80-90’s in southern California.
And had I been gay my mom would have booted me to protect my siblings from my ungodly influence.
My older son is gay and I told my mom I won’t stand for ANYTHING shitty said to or about him, that if he is to be made to feel lesser or bad in anyway about who he is, there would be no more contact.
I’m a Christian, but I’m at the point I don’t want to identify as that. Organized christian religion is so ugly.
I’m spiritual and believe in God, but I want to be far away from “Christian’s” that are ok with what’s going on and with what’s in the Whitehouse.