Billie Eilish’s new album, Happier Than Ever, is out and so that means we’re in yet another promotional cycle from Billie. We’ve been in a non-stop promotional cycle from Billie for easily three years. It’s not that I dislike her or anything, I just wish she would stop giving interviews for a year or two so that she could have new experiences and figure out more of who she is, because her personality at this point is just “the pop star who gives interviews and talks about the same thing over and over.” She’s 19 years old. Who she is at 19 is not who she is going to be forever. Stop expecting her to be anything other than a 19-year-old who f–ks up sometimes and has dumb opinions sometimes. Just let her f–king live. You can read her new Guardian interview here. Some highlights:
Complaints about her boyfriend Matthew Tyler Vorce & everything else: “Uuuugh,” she says of online trolls. “These people don’t do anything. I’m like, do something with your life! Go somewhere. Go get a hobby.”
On insecurity: “Since I was a kid, my dad and I have always talked about a certain type of person who’s so insecure, or hyperaware and self-conscious, that they never move in a weird way, or make a weird face, because they always want to look good. I’ve noticed that, and it makes me so sad. If you’re always standing a certain way, walking in a certain way, and always have your hair just so… It’s such a loss to always try to always look good. It’s such a loss of joy and freedom in your body.”
To people promoting unattainable body standards: “It’s completely fine to get work done – do this, do that, do what makes you feel happy. It’s just when you deny it and say, ‘Oh, I got this all on my own, and if you just tried harder, you could get it.’ That makes me literally furious. It is so bad for young women – and boys, too – to see that. I see people online, looking like I’ve never looked. And immediately I am like, oh my God, how do they look like that? I know the ins and outs of this industry, and what people actually use in photos, and I actually know what looks real can be fake. Yet I still see it and go, oh God, that makes me feel really bad. And I mean, I’m very confident in who I am, and I’m very happy with my life… I’m obviously not happy with my body, but who is?”
Disassociating from her body: “When I’m on stage, I have to disassociate from the ideas I have of my body. Especially because I wear clothes that are bigger and easier to move in without showing everything – they can be really unflattering. In pictures, they look like I don’t even know what. I just completely separate the two. Because I have such a terrible relationship with my body, like you would not believe, so I just have to disassociate… Then you get a paparazzi picture taken when you were running to the door and had just put anything on, and didn’t know the picture’s being taken, and you just look how you look, and everyone’s like, ‘Fat!’”
She hates being alone: “I really don’t like to be alone. I do like having anonymity, or autonomy, but I really am flipped out when I’m alone. I hate it. I have a lot of stalkers, and I have people that want to do bad things to me, and I also am freaked out by the dark and, like, what’s under beds and couches. I have a lot of weird, irrational fears. So I’m still at my parents’ house a lot. I just love my parents and really like it here. It’s very comforting.”
Half of the interview is Billie complaining about being famous, complaining about how she wishes she could be more open with her fans, complaining about how no one should care what anyone else thinks and on and on. I’ve read, easily, ten interviews like this from Billie in the past two years. I get that her life is a self-styled chaos and that’s what comforts her, but at some point, shouldn’t her publicist be like “okay, maybe we’ll stop doing interviews for six months and take it from there.” The fact that she hasn’t outgrown that childhood thing of not being able to be alone bugs me too – it’s not just about stalkers and bad people, she’s always been like that. She doesn’t know how to settle down and sit with her own thoughts by herself. She needs the constant stimulation of “performing” for someone.
Photos courtesy of Billie’s IG.