Billie Eilish: ‘Women should know — you don’t have to be exceptional’

Billie Eilish covers the latest issue of Allure, all to promote her fragrance line. I honestly didn’t even know she dabbled in fragrances, but Billie Eilish No.3 will be her last one… for now. According to Allure, the fragrance line has been successful, which is true of most things Billie is involved in. Most of this interview is not about perfume though, it’s just typical Billie – confessional, self-aware, always taking her own temperature and trying to not only figure out who she is and what she stands for, but also figuring out how she wants to present herself. Some highlights:

She doesn’t want to self-sabotage anymore: “I do this thing where it seems like it’s good to find out all the things that are going to hurt you the most, because when you know all of it, then you can have a sense of control about it. And once you know, you can heal from that. Then I’m invincible! But what I’ve learned…is that time goes by, and I’m still scared. You don’t have to push into pain to get out of pain. I’ve done that, and I don’t want to do it again.”

She’s big into comfort: “I watch things that bring me comfort” — she’s known to be a big fan of The Office — “swim in my pool, but I feel best right out of the shower, with my lotions and my smells and I’m in a clean environment. When you’re in a sh-tty spot emotionally, when you change the things in front of you, it can help so much. I’m trying to prioritize. I wrote in a song years ago…‘to keep myself together and prioritize my pleasure,’” a lyric from “Getting Older,” a song on the album Happier Than Ever. “I said that three years ago, and then I didn’t do it! So I’m doing it now. And I’ve made enough people feel good that I deserve to feel good too.”

Whether she wants to hide from fame: “All the time. But I can do that. That’s the thing about diving into the hurt — I don’t need to do that. I’m starting to do better, but I’ve not been doing so great, to be honest. For a while. I have impending-doom feelings most of the day. When I think too much about it, how I can never have privacy again, it’s enough to make you want to do all sorts of crazy things. But you have to let it go.”

A story about Paris: “There was this moment when I was in Paris, we were driving around, and I was in a bad place. It was not a good time for ol’ Bill. I was not getting better, and didn’t know when I would. And this motorcycle pulled up next to the car, and this guy’s helmet had a sticker on it that said in all caps, ‘Move on.’ I was sitting there like, Oh. Message received. I have a really big problem with control, so I’ve been trying to teach myself that there are things out of your control and you have to move on.”

No more settling: “I have settled many times with things and people and life. I’ve settled for less than I deserved, and I’m not going to do that anymore.”

Her early years: “I have to give credit to the person I’ve always been — I did not give a f-ck at all. Between being a 14-year-old girl, and Finneas being a 17-year-old boy, and us making these little songs — we had to be very clear we weren’t going to just do what anybody said. People could have done crazy sh-t, and I didn’t let them. It was many, many years of having to convince a room full of people that I was going to do what I knew was right for me. I had ideas; I had plans.”

Women don’t have to be exceptional: “But the thing is, people should know — women should know — you don’t have to be exceptional. You can just be a person, and you should get awards for just being. Sometimes artists don’t have plans, and that’s fine, but I did, and I wasn’t going to waste them.”

[From Allure]

I don’t know, I’m a lot older than Billie but I relate to a lot of what she says here. It sounds like she understands what self-soothing techniques help and she’s gotten better at applying them. It also sounds like she’s becoming less of a people-pleaser and more confident in asking for what she wants and needs at every level. “I’ve made enough people feel good that I deserve to feel good too.” Yeah, but it’s not transactional – you don’t have to make people feel good to then prioritize your own desires and well-being. I really liked her “move on” story though – it’s cool how little things like that break through just when you need them.

Photos credit: BauerGriffin/INSTARimages and via Instagram/Allure.

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7 Responses to “Billie Eilish: ‘Women should know — you don’t have to be exceptional’”

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  1. I’m a big believer in messages come our way in different forms and that you have to be ready to receive them wherever they come from. Hers came on a motorcycle helmet and she received it and took it to heart good for her.

    • Smart&Messy says:

      I like her message, it’s very mature. She describes things I try to do too. As a singer/performer I just don’t get the appeal. It’s not just the whisper singing that gets old after like two songs. Her music is very boring to me. Her one good song is Bad Guy, which is waaay too adult for the kids that are her fan base. She can’t (whisper) sing live at all. Compared to Taylor, K Perry, Beyonce or the rapper ladies like Cardi, Meghan TheeStallion, (Lizzo, Pink, Gaga, I could go on forever with women who really bring it for the pricey concert tickets) she is a low energy bore on stage. I just don’t get how she reached such level of fame. I know I’m much older than her target audience, though.

  2. Ameerah M says:

    I own both fragrances and they’re both good. Though I think No.2 is a bit more adult and nuanced than No.1. No.1 reminds me of the fragrance I wore as a teenager – Vanilla Musk. It’s a bit “my first fragrance” . I feel very nostalgic when I wear it. No. 2 is richer and sexier and has more depth to it. Definitely more my cup of tea now as an adult. I’m curious what she will do for No. 3.
    What she said about her environment rang so true for me. I’ve been in a low place lately and one thing I know will make me feel better is creating a more comforting environment for myself within my own space.

    • Christina says:

      My daughter has one of her fragrances. I think it’s number 1. It’s dreamy! It smells really good!

  3. It Really Is You, Not Me says:

    She’s more mature than a lot of women three times her age. Her comment about not having to be extraordinarily all of the time really resonates with me.

  4. idontlie123 says:

    She’s always been one of the whiniest celeb out there. She’s lucky that Demi Lovato, Bll Maher and Lili Reinhart exist or she would be first.