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About a year or so ago, my girlfriends and I had a random debate about the use of the phrase “sexy time” as a substitute for saying you’re getting it on. I’m not even sure how it came up, but one of my friends mentioned that she absolutely hated it because she felt it was infantilizing. I believe the exact words in her conclusion were, “sexy time is not sexy” lol. I disagreed and said that it’s simple, self-descriptive, and way better than saying “bumping uglies” or any other outdated reference.
I think Zoe Saldana would be on my side of the debate. In fact, she uses the phrase herself! Zoe and her husband Marco Perego-Saldana recently appeared on The Drew Barrymore Show. Drew asked them about their feelings on nude bowling (actual bowling while naked). Marco responded by saying that they prefer to “play Legos naked” instead. “Playing Legos naked,” is of course, their go-time code phrase for getting busy whenever their three boys, twins Cy and Bowie, nine, and Zen, seven, are around.
Zoe Saldaña thinks she found a marvelous way to talk about sex around her kids.
In fact, the Guardians of the Galaxy star and her husband Marco Perego-Saldaña developed a code word to use whenever their kids—twin boys Cy Aridio and Bowie Ezio, 9, and son Zen Anton Hilario, 7—are within earshot to let each other know that they’re in the mood.
“We ‘play Legos naked,'” Marco revealed during the couple’s joint appearance on The Drew Barrymore Show April 3, prompting Zoe to clarify that the term means “sexy time.”
However, as the Avatar actress noted, their older boys have seemed to caught onto the lingo.
“They were like, ‘Are you guys kissing? Are you guys gonna go play naked with your Legos?'” Zoe recounted. “And we’re like, ‘No, we’re not going to do that.'”
All this talk about playing naked Legos inspired me to look up other euphemisms. The worst two I found were “slamming the clam” and “taking the hot dog bus to taco town,” while “tickle the pickle” made me snort-laugh. Mr. Rosie, some friends, and I used to jokingly call it “cleaning the gutters,” which was inspired by Justin Therox’s character in The Leftovers saying that he was cleaning the gutters when everyone disappeared while flashbacks revealed that he was actually busy playing Legos naked. Oh, and I will never not associate “afternoon delight” with Arrested Development.
But yeah, LMAO, it’s definitely time for Zoe and Marco to come up with a new code word or phrase, probably one that doesn’t involve the word naked. Or Legos. If you really want to go undetected, it’s always best to pick something mundane. Anyone have any fun code word suggestions? They could also use the ole tried-and-true method in my house which is to ask if it’s “TV time” for the kids and then take advantage of them zoning out and not paying a bit of attention to where mommy and daddy disappeared to. Kids will never question being allowed to watch TV.
photos credit: Xavier Collin / Image Press Agency / Avalon, Getty and via Instagram
In French people sometimes use “sieste crapuleuse”, which would roughly translate as “naughty nap” or “crooked siesta” – not sure what’s the best translation here. But you get the idea 😉
Im reading all the comments on this post today. 😂 we need a new code. We just come up saying that we have an appointment out of nowhere: “dont forget the appointment’s at 9:30”. The kids have no idea
We used “nap time” back when our kids were young enough to nap.
Agree that using the word naked in your code us just asking for the kids to figure it out once they get a bit older.
I know a couple who refers to it as “playing Yahtzee” and that always makes me laugh. 😆
I made a joke one day when my kids were talking about Pokémon and it became “Gigantamaxing” here at the casa de Nobody.
But unfortunately given the perpetual exhaustion there’s not much Gigantamaxing actually happening.
Hubby and I used to say we needed to “discuss finances” and couldn’t be disturbed. I’m afraid my kids may have thought we had serious financial problems!! 🙂
True story, I am in my late 40s and am still disturbed by “mommy and daddy’s special private time” with the bedroom door closed on Sunday mornings before church.
Also my parents thought it would be a really good idea to walk around naked a lot, I’m not sure what the message was supposed to be? Our neighbors actually boarded up one of their windows that faced into our living room at the back of the house. Literally screwed plywood over top of their entire window.
My dude and I just say we have some business to take care of lol
I am so grossed out by this. I actually can’t believe someone would leave small children awake in the other room and go in the bedroom to slap privates so gross. And that sounds like awful mechanical sex too!
My high school bf and I used to call it “fighting crime.” As in, “I’m so tired today. We shouldn’t have stayed up all night fighting crime.” lol. It was the 90’s?