Tiger Woods announces that he’ll play at the Masters next month

2009 Australian Masters - Day 4

Well, that was a short break, wasn’t it? Tiger Woods just announced that he’ll be playing at the Masters golf tournament next month. He released a very self-pitying (in my opinion) statement about how “Although I’m returning to competition, I still have a lot of work to do in my personal life.” Translation: “I want to change the subject and get out of the house because Elin keeps screaming at me over the multitude of whores I have having crazy unprotected Ambien sex with.” Here’s more:

Tiger Woods just released a statement saying that he will be playing at the Masters next month.

“The Masters is where I won my first major and I view this tournament with great respect,” Tiger said in a statement. “After a long and necessary time away from the game, I feel like I’m ready to start my season at Augusta.

“The major championships have always been a special focus in my career and, as a professional, I think Augusta is where I need to be, even though it’s been a while since I last played.

“I have undergone almost two months of inpatient therapy and I am continuing my treatment,” the statement read. “Although I’m returning to competition, I still have a lot of work to do in my personal life.”

“When I finally got into a position to think about competitive golf again, it became apparent to me that the Masters would be the earliest I could play.”

Chairman of Augusta National Golf Club and the Masters Tournament, Billy Payne, told TMZ, “We support Tiger’s decision to return to competitive golf beginning at this year’s Masters Tournament. Additionally, we support and encourage his stated commitment to continue the significant work required to rebuild his personal and professional life.”

Are you surprised Tiger’s already back to golf?

[From OK! Magazine]

I’ve always said that the golf industry needs Tiger so much more than he needs it, so it’s no surprise that Tiger is being welcomed back to the sporting world with open arms. My prediction: Tiger will be up to hundreds of millions of dollars in endorsement deals and contracts within one year. That is, unless he eats on the golf course. Which could happen, I guess. One thing is for sure – this will be the most watched Masters tournament in history. Blech.

2009 Australian Masters - Day 4

2009 Australian Masters - Day 4

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21 Responses to “Tiger Woods announces that he’ll play at the Masters next month”

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  1. meme says:

    just be glad she didn’t cut your peepee off, cheetah.

  2. Lilith says:

    really? sigh…both tiger and chris brown need publicists to tell them to take off a year..participating in immoral behavior and then insisting on being in the public eye after said deed is like giving yourself a huge narcissistic thumbs up ..and everyone else the bird.

  3. Gypsy says:

    haters = Losers.

    Why waste time hating on Tiger, he can’t hear you and even if he could would he even care.
    Well at least now Golf will have an audience.

  4. bellaluna says:

    Colour me shocked *sarcasm* and unimpressed *dead serious*

  5. mel says:

    Itz a man’s world…

  6. niamh (neev) says:

    I’m still a fan of Tiger Woods’ professional accomplishments. Not even two generations ago a black person couldn’t even play on the course, let alone dominate it.

    Thanks to Elin I’m also a huge fan of the 9 iron.

  7. moo says:

    I won’t be watching anymore…

  8. Sumodo1 says:

    Isn’t it lucky that Tiger’s meltdown happened in his off-season? What if this happened in the thick of it? Another reason why Woods is one of the luckiest bastards on Planet Earth, right?

  9. jacobsmama says:

    oh good my life can start again *large eyeroll*

  10. jamman says:

    He’s the greatest black golfer ever.

  11. Fluffy Kitten Tail says:

    Wow, I never saw that coming!

  12. Sincerity says:

    @mel — You’re absolutely right! Business is business and Tiger Woods is returning to what he does best. He’s probably a much better athlete than “a relationship person”, anyway. I, for one, want to see him win the Masters and continue with his trailblazing career. I think he’s learned his lesson. He does not seem like the type who appreciates being distracted from what he loves best. In the future, he’ll do what’s necessary to ensure that his private life remains private.

  13. K-Love says:

    Well golf is what Tiger does and he has to start sometime. Which proably is the best hing he can do. Hopefully a lot more humble and a whole lot wiser. That which he threw away so carelessly, he may never get it back. Because he didn’t value what he had in the first place. he took what he had for granted. He made a human mistake, that people do all the time. But because of who he was. It got the attention that it did. Sometimes you can get back what you lost sometimes you can’t. What you get back is determined in what you learned about what you lost. Tiger didn’t value anything, but most important he didn’t value his self. When you have no value for yourself you value nothing else. Because that which you value you fight for, that which you care about you fight for. He just threw it all away.Something went wrong with Tiger a long time ago. And it’s going to take more than 2 months and 2 weeks to fix it. I truely hope that he does. Because as a great man said. Mistakes not learned from must be repeated.

  14. QuinnEdwards says:

    Is Elin going to be there smiling & rooting for him? Not likely.
    Is she back with him?
    Will anyone be allowed to ask?

  15. Gypsy says:

    @QuinnEdward –
    Why would you want to know his private business? – Don’t you have a life?

    Tiger Woods is the #1 Golfer in the world and the greatest Golfer with wins only second to Arnold Palmer, but youngest ever in wins.
    All I want to know about Tiger is what he does on the Golf course, I don’t need to know his bathroom habits.

  16. imo says:

    @ #10 “He’s the greatest black golfer ever.” Correction, he’s the greatest Golfer ever. Race has nothing to do with it. Glad to hear he’s going back to golf and I wish him and his family the best. People need to learn how to separate the personal from the professional.

  17. ogechi says:

    @imo: Am with you absolutely.
    Tiger I welcome you bro…You are legendary. Make your fans proud! Love you man.

  18. Kevin says:

    He’s three quarters Thai. Just saying.

  19. mel says:

    Really, we have to bring race into it???

  20. princess pea says:

    Yawn. Of course he will. What else does he have going for him? He needs the fame and attention, just like all the celebs do.

    I still don’t understand why he is so important, though. If golf NEEDS Tiger to get anyone to care or watch, then there’s a problem with GOLF. One person does not make or break a sport.

  21. Eric Seventy says:

    Tiger said in his “apology speech” how much he has to work out and how long and hard the road will be. I guess he took the shortcut, ’cause now he’s back at golf. More likely the wife told him to get his cheatin’ butt back on the course and earn some bucks so when she dumps his sorry behind, she can catch some more alimony and child support.