For a week now, I’ve been ignoring a royal story. That story? Prince Edward had a relationship with an actress named Ruthie Henshall in the late 1980s. It was not a scandalous affair, it was just a fling. Henshall wrote about the fling in lurid detail in her new book, and the British press has been trying to make fetch happen all week, to no avail. Because no one cares, right? Like, I have some half-hearted interest in gossip about Prince Edward, but I could not care less about “Edward banged an actress nearly 40 years ago, SCANDAL!” So I’ve ignored the story, as have most outlets outside the royalist media. Well, now the Daily Mail’s Jan Moir is furiously trying to make people care about Edward’s fling by comparing-and-contrasting with you-know-who. That’s right, Prince Harry has a lot to learn from his uncle Edward!

You might have noticed that a naughty, somewhat pampered mama’s boy and fully paid-up prince of the British realm was in the news this week. A prince who once said, ‘The British media hate anyone who succeeds’, and also that ‘America is where the money is’. A prince who was once accused of using his royal privilege to make television programmes about other members of the Royal Family without their permission. A prince who once made a fool of himself in an unwise choice of fancy-dress outfit and was mocked for his troubles.

But the prince in question is not – surprisingly – bitter, fuming Harry. It is Prince Edward. Yes, that Prince Edward – the dark horse, the white sheep, the last born, the least likely. And the way both men have played the hand that fate has dealt them while negotiating the highs and lows of royal life couldn’t be more different. Being the third son and fourth child of a monarch, Edward is an even bigger spare than Harry, if that is possible.

Yet you would never guess this from his cheerful demeanour and fortitudinous manner. The Duke of Edinburgh works hard and has never publicly complained nor moaned about his lot.

Unlike Harry, he hasn’t barrelled around the world like a furious banshee, demanding status, respect and amends from his family and enemies but nothing of himself. And I think he is the happier and better person for it. This week Edward had to suffer a fresh and embarrassing public trial, when he featured prominently in the pages of West End star Ruthie Henshall’s panting new autobiography The Showgirl And The Prince. Suddenly, the tweedy 62-year-old was plunged back into a past he thought – hoped! – had been forgotten.

…Yet, oddly, Edward and his labelled pants come out of the book rather well. He seems a decent sort, despite it all. Yes, he never wanted their affair to be made public and clearly did not view Ruthie as wife material, but he did introduce her to his family and she did spend time with them at Balmoral and Windsor. The Royals and their staff were always kind to Edward’s showgirl, despite her ‘potty mouth’ and unconventional ways.

This is in marked contrast to the frostiness the Duchess of Sussex says she experienced, as an outsider in a royal atmosphere she found hostile and unsupportive. Perhaps the truth is simply that they were very different women encountering the Windsors in very different eras. Perhaps there is no comparison to be made. Or perhaps it is that Ruthie had a better understanding of how The Firm worked – and she certainly had a more equable prince at her side to guide her through the pitfalls. Steady Eddie wrote her love notes, made her toasted cheese, spent time with her family and let her down gently in the end.

It has been a momentous week for both the Duke of Edinburgh and the Duke of Sussex, who were both the subject of vivid newspaper headlines and who both responded in characteristic ways. After losing his privacy case against this newspaper group, Prince Harry fired off a hothead statement in which be blamed everyone but himself. After Prince Edward was exposed as a former playboy who enjoyed stroking his Cat, he kept his head down and fired off nothing. While Spare Harry complains, launches doomed crusades and fights the eternal uprising in his own brain. Spare Edward straightens his tie, puts one polished brogue in front of the other and just gets on with it. Both men are navigating a royal twilight, in which the puzzle of royal existence is brought into increasing focus by the morbid criticism from Montecito.

While Harry continues to noisily battle his own demons and single-handedly diminish his own public standing, one suspects it is the quiet poise of his uncle – this dull and dutiful duke – that will prevail in the end.

[From The Daily Mail]

I actually enjoy when these horrid people try to compare-and-contrast the Sussexes with other royals, twisting the narratives so that Harry and Meghan always come up short. Gee, I wonder why the Windsors treated Ruthie Henshall differently than they treated Meghan? Gee, I wonder why the institution treats Edward differently than Harry when they can control Edward? Gee, I wonder if Harry was ever given one tenth of the grace given to Edward? Anyway, I cannot imagine anything more embarrassing for Edward – his ex is revealing lurid details about their sex life and no one cares, so they dragged his nephew into it to hype him up.

Photos courtesy of Avalon Red, Cover Images.