Lady Gaga, Ashton Kutcher & Sparkles make Time’s “Most Influential” list

Photo by: AT1/Xposure/ 2010 3/17/10 Robert Pattinson at the premiere of Rem

Time Magazine’s annual “Most Influential People” list has come out, and it’s a doozy. I generally enjoy the lists, just because they’re a good read, but I almost always disagree with the people who make the “Most Influential Artists” portion. This year is no different. Time’s list of most influential artists includes, in no particular order: Lady Gaga, Conan O’Brien, Kathryn Bigelow, Oprah, Robert “Sparkles” Pattinson, Ashton Kutcher, Taylor Swift, Neil Patrick Harris, the Lost dudes (Cuse and Lindelof), Prince, Lea Michele, Simon Cowell, Banksy, Marc Jacobs, Elton John, Sandra Bullock, James Cameron and Ricky Gervais.

Yes, you read that right. SPARKLES! Pattinson made the list, Twihards, although Kristen Stewart was c-ckblocked, probably because she chopped off her Bella hair. Gaga I actually agree with – she’s what’s happening in music today. I also love the inclusion of Neil Patrick Harris and the Lost dudes, because of their cult-like popularity. But Prince? Seriously? What is this, 1991? Lea Michele? Seriously? Ashton Kutcher? REALLY?

Here are some excerpts:

I have to be careful about what I write here because it will be tweeted the moment TIME hits the stands. And if I say something bad about Rob Pattinson, I’m dead meat. That’s the devotion the Twilight films inspire. It’s certainly not how he planned it. And though I am continually impressed by the aplomb with which he handles the hysteria, I occasionally think he would take it all back if given the chance. Because essentially, Rob, 23, is a reserved, bookish sort of specimen, a guy who’d rather spend the night at the corner table in the pub with friends — a bit of a weirdo, frankly, in the best sense.

So how to write about someone who seems to answer Freud’s rhetorical question, What do women want? Perhaps it’s just worth pointing out that it’d be fun to have a beer with him even if he weren’t Edward Cullen. That we haven’t seen a tenth of what he can do onscreen. And that important things, beyond the veil of Hollywood, occupy his time too — music, conversation, ideas, a sense of the absurd. Which, maybe, explains why he never gets to my e-mails. I love you, Rob! Call me!

Neil loves magic tricks. He’s good at them, but his greatest trick may be himself: not just the way he was suddenly all over TV — and other media — but also that he made it seem like he’d always been there, a charming, Carsonesque presence. While he flourished as both an actor and a persona, he serenely announced he was gay. And that was that. He’s been nominated for an Emmy three times for his role as hetero hound Barney Stinson on How I Met Your Mother not because he’s playing straight but because he’s very funny. He made the issue of his sexuality disappear without desexualizing himself. He can get the girl and sing about the boys, and it all works. The public’s perception of gay men is shifting because of this guy, and they’ll be too entertained to notice. That’s more than a good trick. That’s magic.

I first met Ashton Kutcher when we were both on MTV. He was doing Punk’d, and I was doing Making the Band. For a while, with Jamie Foxx, we were a rat pack, hanging out, going to clubs. I remember one night he was with Demi, maybe for the first time, and a couple of weeks later he called to tell me he was in love. That was the end of our clubbing.

But we are still friends. Not that cliché of “Let’s make a movie, let’s do a deal.” He is a sounding board for me. Like me, he’s a mogul — a new-media mogul. But we are yin and yang: I am in your face, but he is understated, cool, suave.

Most of us want to make as much money as we can, but Ashton, 32, is out to make the world a better place. He is smart — smart enough to leave Punk’d when he could still be making money at it. He has to have a heart in what he does. What he and Demi do with Twitter is a good example. Most people use it to promote themselves, but he uses Twitter to connect, to strike up conversations, to send positive messages to the millions of people who read his words. This guy will show us the future. And it’s gonna be a blast.

[From Time Magazine]

You can read more excerpts here, just click on the name.

This list totally sucks. I don’t even have words. Any list that would include Ashton Kutcher as most influential anything… just don’t. Ugh.

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13 Responses to “Lady Gaga, Ashton Kutcher & Sparkles make Time’s “Most Influential” list”

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  1. Ron says:

    P Diddy talking about both he and Ashton being “moguls”. Wow I don’t think I have ever read anything, supposedly written about someone else, that is so self serving. P Diddy must be one of those friends where you always have to make the first call. Egotastic.

  2. itzbilebitch says:

    I agree with a lot of those but Ashton Kutcher wtf has he done lately except annoy everyone on twitter are u dead set he can influence my a**. thats bs

  3. Lil says:

    I don’t even care about those posers (Ashton, Diddy, blah, blah, blah). I just love Neil Patrick Harris. So freaking adorable and such a major loss for the hetero team. 🙂

  4. lucy2 says:

    Any list that has Ashton Kutcher as influential is bogus. The only thing I see him do these days are twitter (the inventors of which are influential, but not someone who uses it) and camera commercials – is he influencing us to buy a camera? And please, any list that has Poof Dooddle the write up for Ashton is DOUBLE bogus.

    Sparkles…no. I know Twilight is huge and all, but I don’t think it’s particularly well done or well acted – how was he influential?

    I really like Lea Michele on Glee and she is incredibly talented – if they chose her as a rep for the whole show, OK, but individually I don’t think so. Not yet anyway.

    I’m on board with NPH, Conan, Gaga, Bigelow, Cameron, and most of the others though.

  5. Aitch says:

    They need to define “influential.”

  6. jover says:

    Any list that pairs the word “artist” with Taylor Swift should be dismissed out of hand. Guitar 101 strumming is not Jimi cranking out Voodoo Child at Woodstock, and studio enhanced whiny nasally vocals are not Ella Fitzgerald. Leave it to a lame worn out mag trying to be hip to produce a lame list.

  7. Jeri says:

    Funny how people like to describe themselves as a “rat pack” but nobody else describes them that way. Guess no-one else is hip enough to get “it.”

  8. voiceover says:

    perhaps the meaning of “most influential artist” is equivocal to “drives fans wild/gets hits on blogs/brings money in for sponsors”? I don’t know. All the people listed are the big names right now, the ones everybody reads and talks about constantly. They all have hit shows, hit movies, hit songs. In my mind, they ARE influential. But that has nothing to do with substance. They just bring in numbers, that’s all.

  9. xxodettexx says:

    ashton? really? **puke**

  10. Bella Mosley says:

    Maybe Ashton could use his influence to get his wife to admit to plastic surgery. BTW – who does he influence? I follow some people on twitter from time what everyone is talking about but that in no way means their words would carry any weight with me. I have never followed Ashton or his wife as whatever they have to say would be of absolutely no interest to me.

    And remember – Ashton was begging on every program to get him to a million. I have never heard of anyone else going on shows and pleading for people to follow them.

  11. chris says:

    Robert Pattinson definitely should be on the list. Maybe even higher than 6. However, when they include people like Lea Michele it just makes the list look stupid. How is it possible for her to be on the list?

  12. Scotchy says:

    I agree with you. These lists are about numbers and that’s it.
    Not substance or real influence

  13. M says:

    Why does Gaga have _ _ Monster written on her arm in Katakana and in permanent marker? lol