TV comedians on the Spitzer Resignation

Stephen Colbert

Stephen Colbert joked about the major story of the day and at first said it was John Gibson leaving Fox New’s “The Big Story” and then Tucker Carlson’s MSNBC cancellation, but then finally talked about Spitzer. He covered how the media followed the governor’s SUV through traffic for 20 minutes hoping he would stop and pick up a prostitute. They showed a close up of the car and it had a bumper sticker that said “My other ride is a hooker.”

Colbert pointed out to much applause that Spitzer appeared on his show on the night after he arranged for the hooker to come meet him, which was one day before he committed the deed that led to his resignation. He said he was “The meat in the Spitzer sandwich” and that “a lot of people consider an interview on my show a form of foreplay.”

Jimmy Kimmel monologue

Kimmel’s monologue wasn’t that great. He said that if you do the math of $80,000 spent on hookers over the last ten years, that’s only $22 a day. He also said that Spitzer didn’t seem contrite in his speech, then they showed a fake clip of the end of Spitzer’s speech that had a hooker getting up from underneath the podium afterwards.

Kimmel showed the picture of Spitzer’s hooker in a bikini and said that he should have held it up and said “Look at her. What are you going to do?” Then he brought on his security team as the “worst political team on tv” to talk about the scandal.

David Letterman’s monologue

Letterman said Spitzer left his resignation on the nightstand with a $300 tip. He also said it’s a somber mood in NY and the hookers in Times Square were wearing black armbands. Letterman quipped that Spitzer will now have to pay women to call him Governor. He said Spitzer was on Hillary Clinton’s shortlist for a possible Vice President and “boy she can pick ‘em can’t she?”

The Daily Show

Stewart’s was easily the funniest commentary on the scandal.

“The answer: ‘A day and a half.’ The question: ‘What is the amount of extra time you get to stay in power after the revelation of a sex scandal if you are a non-gay governor.’”

“And so, Elliot Spitzer headed to his midtown office to make the announcement while receiving what the networks now refer to as ‘The Full OJ’” [cameras following his SUV]

“As you can see, the trip gave commentators ample time for analysis.” [Cut to boring comments by news reporters about traffic.]

“If you’re in the car with your wife, on the way to resign from the state’s highest office after facing prostitution charges. I’d run that light…”

As for the fact that the Governor’s wife accompanied him to the second press conference, Stewart said “Calgon take her away! There’s got to be a chaise lounge in Bermuda with that lady’s name on it…”

Stewart pointed out the irony in Spitzer’s remarks that “From those to whom much is given much is expected.”

He answered: “Which is why I gave over $80,000 to hookers. I expected a lot from them. And then of course the big news.”

Stewart jokes that the day Spitzer has chosen for the “orderly transition is St. Patrick’s Day” and shows a picture of a shirtless guy drinking a beer wearing giant green sunglasses and a green top hat. “I’m beginning to wonder about this guy’s judgment.”


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8 Responses to “TV comedians on the Spitzer Resignation”

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  1. Wif says:

    I apologise that this comment has no bearing on the scandal, BUT…in the header picture his wife looks to me like what Jennifer Aniston could look like in 20 years if she can keep the cosmetic surgery to a minimum.

  2. headache says:

    I’m so irritated by how much the media wants to just sweep this under the rug as a simple sexual whoopsie.

    This man carefully and deliberately broke the law.

  3. anni says:

    wait a minute, prostitution or going to a hooker is against the law in the US? folks, relax. really. don´t be so updight about the sex and this stuff wouldn´t happen. i can´t believe how prude the US still is.

  4. DM says:

    Put aside his utmost INDIGNITY of using American’s tax money for his sick pleasures and abusing of his wife – What he did is illegal. He should go to court. WHY isn’t he getting charged? Just cause he WAS

  5. Poor Kids says:

    I really feel sorry for this man’s daughters…

  6. gg says:

    I think he is maintaining that he used “his own personal income” to pay for them. Of course, that’s difficult to prove, and that also has no bearing in my mind as to what’s right and wrong.

    His poor wife. She’s no slouch either. She has credentials and is a very smart lady. She’s probably planning her escape route right about now.

  7. stellapurdy says:

    It’s not just breaking the law with prostitutes, it’s trafficking money across state lines for illegal activity, a violation of federal law. Not to mention that he sold the taxpayers of NYS an efn bill of goods.

  8. You know: I just can’t get serious about this story. This blog entry was the best coverage of it on the internet to date.