Kim Kardashian shuts down player Jeremy Piven

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The National Enquirer has a longish story about Jeremy Piven hitting on Kim Kardashian, and Kim shutting that sh-t down. I don’t know why they needed to go into so much detail, because the story is pretty funny just in of itself. The basics: The Pic went over to Kim Kardashian when she and her sisters were at a Lakers game. Apparently, The Piv has had his eye on Kim for a while, and they met first when she did a cameo on Entourage. They know each other socially, meaning they’ve probably done coke together at a few parties. Here’s how it went down:

“Kim knows Jeremy socially, but when he came on to her by offering her a bigger part on Entourage, she quickly rejected him,” an insider tells The Enquirer.

“She told him, ‘Talk to my mom – she handles me,’ and then turned on her heel and walked away. Jeremy was flabbergasted – he felt totally dissed.”

Jeremy is used to women falling all over him, says the insider – so he was stunned when Kim shunned his advances.

“Kim knows his reputation as a big player, and she didn’t even entertain being another notch on his belt. And besides, she likes athletes and felt he was kind of short.”

[From The National Enquirer, print edition]

Kind of short? Bitches without jobs shouldn’t throw stones, Kim! At least he has a career, for goodness sake. But I can’t fault Kim for dissing The Piv. He’s gross, and he just seems like the kind of guy who comes on a little too strong and a little too… date-rapey. You know? I’m not calling him a date rapist AT ALL, I’m just saying that he seems like the guy at the bar who just won’t leave you alone and just won’t take a hint and acts all offended when you’re like, “Dude, come on, I’m just trying to have a drink with my girlfriend” and he gets all pissy and nasty and he calls you fat and then goes out into the parking lot and keys your car. The Piv is so that guy. Plus, Kim does have a new boyfriend – for now. She’s dating Dallas Cowboy Miles Austin. Much hotter than The Piv.

The Piv is wearing something from “The Michael Lohan Mesh Shirt Collection” in this photo:

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Kim on July 1, 2010. The Piv on April 15 & July 1, 2010. Credit for all: Fame.

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28 Responses to “Kim Kardashian shuts down player Jeremy Piven”

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  1. guesty says:

    lol @ the description of that little schmuck. what a distorted ego to think that kim would even…please.

  2. PrettyTarheel says:

    I love Ari!!!!!!!!

  3. maya says:

    I saw this story in the National Enquirer and I don’t believe it. I do believe Kim would shoot Jeremy down. He is not hot and not her type based on the past men she has dated.

  4. Marjalane says:

    If it weren’t for his money, and the chance he might further someone’s (ahem) fame goals, this toad wouldn’t stand a chance at getting laid by ANYONE.

  5. Nanea says:

    “… is used to women falling all over him…”

    The Piv is such a desperate loser.

    He once tried to pick me up at a film festival in Europe. I just laughed at him instead of replying, then he asked me if I knew who he is, and I just replied that he apparently didn’t know who I am! Not that I actually *am* anyone other than in my job (medical research), but it was totally worth to see the stupid look on his face.

  6. Oi says:

    I wish she had gone out with the Piv so she can step away from Miles Austin! They better be over by football season. Dallas is NOT going to welcome ANOTHER famewhore girlfriend, winning or not.

    @Nanea: well, rest assured that medical research is more beneficial to the human race than Piv is.

  7. canadianchick says:

    Wasn’t there a sexual harassment issue about Entourage actors pressuring female actors? And Piv-stay in your lane, dude.

  8. Feebee says:

    @ Nanea, your story just made my morning!

  9. El Predicto says:

    Sorry Ari….wrong color for Kim!

  10. Lady LaLa says:

    Kim loves da Brothas

  11. Tory says:

    @ Oi: A Kardashian might actually give the Cowboys a chance….Saints win the Superbowl, Lakers win the Championship — it might actually be their best chance : )

  12. Tia C says:

    @ Nanea: LOL, nice way to handle the Piv.

    Yeah, he’s definitely not KK’s type. At all. Funny that he thought he had a chance!

  13. GatsbyGal says:

    Hahahahah Kaiser, your description of him is dead on. Tell him you’re not interested, and he’d be all like, “Yeah well fuck you, ya fat cow, ya got sloppy cans anyway, I don’t care.” Ewwwww.

    It’s weird…just the other week on tv I saw an old movie from like 1994 with him in it, and he looked more bald than he does now. What’s the deal, Piv?

  14. Pix says:

    Jeremy Piven is bald. That rug he wears on his head is gross. I don’t fault any woman for dissing him.

  15. pam says:

    Kim has plenty of jobs. She owns a boutique with her sisters and she gets paid plenty for that reality show.

  16. Jeri says:

    Kind of Short and kind of PALE…

  17. Lydia says:

    I guess “athletes” is supposed to be a euphemism for black guys.

  18. birdgherl says:

    JP is a bald, coke-snorting, womanizing douche.

    As for KK – please, I beg of you to stop with the injections in your face. You are barely recognizable!

  19. Ashley says:

    he’s not dark enough for her, he should have known better

  20. Maria says:

    Excuse me, but kim has plenty of jobs like my friend above described, she has two stores, dash calabasas and dash miami. She has a perfume, endorses her own products, has a show company called SHOEDAZZLE, models, and also has a show “keeping up with the kardashians” for you to say she doesnt have a job is a lie, get your shit straight. She probably makes more money than jeremy piven. What does he do? Work on one show. He isnt on the same level as her. She maybe a “famewhore” but she knows how to make money.

  21. Nanya Bizness says:

    is it so bad that Kim is attracted to black men?
    not sure why some people need to mention it, when it’s common knowledge. so unimportant…NEXT!

  22. Dan says:

    Can’t believe i’m about to say this but….GO KIM!

  23. Ogechi says:

    @Ashley: Ditto

  24. nicole says:

    Listen I’m not here to defend Piven, I’m neither a fan or acquintance. If you were talking about game 7 i was fortunate enough to be invited and attented that wonderful game by a season ticket holder. Let me tell you my version of what happened…i happened to see piven on two different occasions: 1 in the vip area were the celebs would congraget and saw him with guys like jake gyllenhall, andy garcia and george lopez; and i didnt see the kardashians at that particular time. anyway, the second time that i saw piven was after the game at the same vip area where i was having dinner with my group and piven and a buddy of his were sitting next to us. the second i saw him sit with his food a woman was mouthing off in back of us, “there’s jeremy, omg! he knows me, i know him, we’re great friends! blah blah blah”, like an 8th grade cheerleader. I turn around and it was mama kardashian, i barely recognized her, she had more makeup on than a rodeo clown, sorry no offense, its the first time ive been near people ive seen on tv. i never frequent celebrity hangouts. She starts pleading with this errand boy to go over to piven and request him to come over and say hi. The errand boy runs to piven and yells to jeremy, “mama kardashian wants to talk to you, shes over there, shes over there, shes over there.” As jeremy tries put food in his mouth and is in deep conversation with his friend, he replies,” hey bro, calm down, what is it that you would want me to do?” The errand boy recelient and trying to get Piven to the table, keeps replying, ” they all wanna see you!” over and over and over again. Piven replies, “Calm down, let me finish my food and I’ll go over there.” Jeanie Buss and her friends pull up chairs by piven and his friendat this time. anyways, Piven shortly gets up…in the mean time all i hear is mama Kardashian babbling on about how she knows Jeremy Piven. Piven goes over and engages in random conversation. After about 10 min. of what seems to be a meaningless conversation, there seems to be exaggerated voices coming from the entrance, its kim kardashian.

    i must say i was looking forward to seeing her after seeing her in magazines and beauty commercials, i was intrigued. Reasonably, i stopped paying attention to piven and focused on kim while they were at the bar. Her friends quickly acknowledged that Piven was with her mother. But before Kim could waddle her way to the table he had already plesantly said his goodbyes and already was seated back to his original table. The girls pleaded over and over for Piven to come back but with no avail, much to my dismay, i finally got a solid look of kim. To my disappointment i saw a girl 5’5 even in stripper boots and more makeup than her mother. I looked to my friend and said, ” Are you effing kidding me????” I cant believe this, she doesnt look anything like her magazines, her tv show, her everything!!! I’m completely beside myself. Shes nothing what she appears to be in the magazines or commercials. Piven and his friends gather there things and leave the vip area. And i could honestly say the look on kims face without Jeremy saying hello or goodbye had a look of “how dare you!” Needless to say, my friend is a professional athlete, i was fortunate enough to see Piven and more celebs at the after party.

    p.s. just calling how i saw it…..or how it was.

  25. Zoey says:

    you go girl!
    some losers want to taste what only winners taste.
    guys like that are meant for the trash.
    i love the way you handled him kim

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  28. bloatedreality says:

    They should date. Piven is a douche and Kim Kardashian is a nasty whore who needs to douche. Snatch made in celebrity heaven.