Jessica Simpson & her gay BFF Ken Paves’ split gets nasty & hilarious


37874, LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA - Friday February 19 2010. Jessica Simpson's friend/hairdresser Ken Paves mistakenly grabs her boob as they leave BOA Steakhouse. Photograph: Devone Byrd, PacificCoastNews.com

A few weeks ago, sources started muttering that Jessica Simpson and her BFF Ken Paves may have “broken up.” We got a tip last month that they weren’t even speaking to each other, and now media outlets are getting a slew of bitchy back-and-forth quotes from Team Simpson and Team Paves. It’s kind of hilarious. If it wasn’t so tragic, so very Jessica Simpson. I actually got a wave of nostaliga while reading this Us Weekly story – this is always how Jess’s breakups go. There are lies and recriminations and so, so much drama it’s like being back in middle school. It was like that with Tony Romo too! I guess it doesn’t matter that Jess and Ken Paves never f-cked. They were more intimate than that – he did her hair!

Jessica Simpson went out to eat with her boyfriend Eric Johnson on September 17, and a fellow diner claims “She looked super-cute.” But something is missing from Simpson’s life lately – her best friend through thick and thin, hairstylist Ken Paves.

The once ever-present Ken Paves has been MIA for months. Though other pals partied in Capri for Jess’s 30th birthday, he was noticeably absent. Tellingly, it was during that same trip that Johnson, 31, made his debut on her arm. Indeed, a Simpson family source says the friendship of 12 years cooled because of the romance: “Ken is sick of her cycle of dumping friends when she’s with a guy.”

In a pattern dating back to her breakup with Nick Lachey, Simpson goes AWOL when in love, only to return to Paves (and margaritas!) to nurse her broken heart post-split.

“She doesn’t care about the world, only herself,” says a source close to Paves. “All she talks about is men, love and sex.”

At the center of the rift is Johnson, a divorcing NFL player whom the Paves source calls “a user.” A Simpson pal says of the four-month relationship, “Her friends are unsure about his intentions. He doesn’t seem to have his own life.”

Seconds a Johnson source, “He was going to go to business school and instead to live with a famous girl in her mansion.”

Although Paves sent a tweet on the September 6 anniversary of Simpson’s dog Daisy’s death by coyote, Latina actress and client Eva Longoria Parker seems to be his BFF du jour.

“It’s a PR move,” says a Simpson source. “Ken’s launching his hair-care line in Latin American.”

But a Paves pal sniffs, “Jessica isn’t his only client – or friend.”

[From Us Weekly, print edition]

Isn’t this one of the most hilariously bitchy pieces you’ve ever read? To the cut about Jessica’s drinking habits (AND MARGARITAS), to dismissing Eva Longoria as just a brown girl who will help him in Latin America, to the inappropriate comparison of Eva to Jess (“sniff”) to this gem: “She doesn’t care about the world, only herself. All she talks about is men, love and sex.” Durr. Would you actually WANT Jess to talk about anything else? Beyond her obvious limitations (mentally), I’m not really dying to hear what she says about the economy or immigration. Anyway, I’m kind of in love with this story… such weepy melodrama, the epic trauma of a gay dude and his hag breaking up FOREVER. Actually, I don’t think it’s going to be forever. If Ken was really burning his bridges, he would have thrown in some quotes about Jessica’s horrible fashion, or her weight gain. That would have been FOREVER.

39448, NEW YORK, NEW YORK - Monday April 12 2010. Jessica Simpson arrives back at her hotel wearing a metallic Matthew Williamson geometric print dress. Jessica and her hair stylist BFF Ken Paves returned to the hotel after dinner at Cipriani restaurant on Fifth Avenue. Photograph: PacificCoastNews.com

37872, LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA - Friday February 19 2010. Hairdresser Ken Paves and Jessica Simpson leave BOA Steakhouse after celebrating Jessica's father Joe's birthday. Photograph: Josephine Santos, PacificCoastNews.com

Jessica Simpson and a hairstylist Ken Paves are arm in arm as they head into dine together at Mr. Chow this evening in Beverly Hills, Ca on December 08, 2009 Fame Pictures, Inc

Singer Jessica Simpson (R) arrives with hairstylist Ken Paves at the Smile Gala, where she and her family were honored by Operation Smile, a worldwide children's medical charity in Beverly Hills, California on October 2, 2009. UPI/Jim Ruymen Photo via Newscom

Jessica Simpson was looking a little worse for wear as she arrived at Beso in Hollywood, CA on August 5, 2009 to celebrate good friend Ken Paves' birthday. Fame Pictures, Inc

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49 Responses to “Jessica Simpson & her gay BFF Ken Paves’ split gets nasty & hilarious”

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  1. Rachel says:

    I love your little photo montage. I may have even heard “Through the Years” playing in the background. *wipes tear*

  2. lucy2 says:

    I think this is more junior high than high school!

  3. danielle says:

    He’s making a huge mistake. Jessica’s made him alot of money.

  4. original kate says:

    aw…if my gay boyfriend & i broke up i would be so sad.

  5. Mandy says:

    Love it! Every hag should know: Be good to your gays, or they will DESTROY you.

  6. TaylorB says:

    “All she talks about is men, love and sex”

    Isn’t that what most BFFs talk about?

  7. tuatara says:

    Weird boob-grab in the first photo. How does that happen?

  8. RobN says:

    Gotta wonder if the jock boyfriend isn’t comfortable hanging out with the gay guy and Jessica picked this month’s boyfriend over a longterm friend.

  9. kelbear says:

    TaylorB that’s what I was thinking. I have been talking about men, love and sex with my bff since high school and she hasn’t gone anywhere.

  10. TG says:

    Good maybe she can find somebody to dress her and fix her hair.

  11. Snarf says:

    Yet since the split, Jessica’s looked far better than she has when Ken was lurking about.

  12. Persistent Cat says:

    She does seem like the type that would totally ditch her friends everytime she has a new boyfriend. Most women grow out of that but since Jessica’s emotional growth is stunted, she’ll never stop doing that.

    I would LOVE to watch this get more ridiculous.

  13. archiepelago says:

    She had such a great voice – when did she become a cartoon?

  14. D says:

    There are rumors that Eric is controlling. Perhaps he is the reason for the distance in the friendship.

    After 12 years of friendship, Ken should know that Jessica is so wanting to be loved that she loses her shit when she does feel loved. Ken should understand that. They never split when Tony was in the picture. So this makes me think there is some other force involved.

    Her hair looks so much better since she’s been at odds with Ken.

  15. TaylorB says:

    Kelbear,

    Same here. That is what BFFs are for, who the hell else are you going to talk about that stuff with? Co-workers, your parents? I think not.

  16. lol says:

    When you talk fashions it was Ken that did that for Jess too & she definatley these days is looking better.

    Ken is in a new relationship as is Jessica. Most new relationships start out with only time for each other.. Would anyone like to reverse the roles here & say maybe its Ken & not Jessica but of course anyone but Jessica gets a free pass right.

  17. bb says:

    Gay BFF stylists are overrated. I tried having a gay hair stylist, and the whole time my hair looked like a gay 16 year old scene kid’s.

  18. Kitten says:

    I want a cute gay boyfriend! Boo :(

  19. anon says:

    Why is the scrutniy not the same for Ken’s gay boyfriend.. Does he work other then porn, He’s 22. Could he possibly be using Kens wealth & popularity. Is Ken having a midlife crisis. Is Ken desperate for the same love Jessica is looking for.
    Eric made a few million in football & not at Jess level but he certainly has enough to cover his butt & look after himself & many with just a small amout of wealth don’t need a 9-5 job etc. If ERIC invested wisely regardless of his divorce he has some money. Were all told he is a very smart man. What Ken boyfriend bankroll any idea? So who is using who & this looks more like Ken’s sources leaking all this crap then anyone.

  20. Shi-gatsu says:

    I agree – a woman and her hairstylist encapsulates a bond that not anyone can touch.

    I love you Roger!

  21. Mari says:

    @TaylorB- agreed. My friends have known me long enough to know where I stand on issues like the economy, politics, capitol punishment, abortion, taxes, etc so it would be the same conversations over and over. What does change, however, are the abstact issues like love, sex, men [not that men are abstract, well...maybe a little]

  22. tango says:

    Maybe Ken is just tired of picking Jessica up when she once again, picks the wrong guy and then desperately tries to make him the right guy to only get dumped. That leaves her even more desperate the next time she picks the wrong guy.

    Sooner or later we all like to see our friends learn from their mistakes. I think Ken is tired of watching Jessica make bad choices and then expect sympathy afterwards for it ending exactly like everyone told her it would and Jessica is tired of Ken proving once again that he knows these various guys aren’t right for her.

  23. dingle says:

    pal “sniffs”?

    who writes this crap

  24. OC lady says:

    “All she talks about is men, love and sex”

    Wait–he was expecting MORE? From Jessica Simpson? Please–you’re lucky to get a complete, logical sentence. :-)

  25. Raccoon Princess says:

    What do you want to bet the “source close to Paves” is named Ken and sports an eye lift.

  26. Katija says:

    My hair dresser is an old Chinese woman. (Scoff all you want, she’s me and my mother’s best kept secret!!!) I should start bringing her out with me to night clubs and stuff. Obviously it’s the cool thing to do.

  27. Riley says:

    You are right on point when you ask, “Would you want her to talk about anything else?” Ha ha. Jess is best when the only thing she has to worry about his dropping some kids off at the pool…

  28. lala in nYc says:

    @Katija: Ha ha ha! Hilarious!

    Maybe, I’ll bring my old Chinese hair stylist out clubbing with me too!

  29. Abby says:

    My fave part of this whole page is the GIANT BAG Jessica has. I think Ken could fit inside.

    I really hope she gets her clothes and hair act together now. Seriously girlfriend.

  30. Anna says:

    So no more ads featuring Jessica’s dopey facial expressions while Ken applies hairpieces?

  31. Feebee says:

    Team Simpson or Team Paves? Seriously? He is/was her bloody hairdresser! (and BFF but that’s beside the point I’m trying to make).

    You are the “help” to the “talent”. If you have a falling out, you have a falling out and you move on as you have other clients (Eva right Kenny?). Simpson has done a lot for the visibility and viability of Ken Paves’ career. If he was a true BFF he doesn’t go to the gossip rags with shit like this. So then he wasn’t which means he definitely doesn’t get Team Paves (not for this, maybe if she owed him huge $$$ for professional services). If they were married and the genders were reversed he may even be called a gold-digging famewhore… sounds about right.

  32. Stephanie says:

    Jessica, nevermind Ken. Meet my friend Treadmill… ;)

  33. Carrie says:

    Kaiser- major props on the photos! You managed to find the best possible pictures to accompany the story (especially the first one!).

  34. Siren6 says:

    He’s Daniel Dicriscio to her Anna Nicole Smith.

    If she can’t keep the straight boyfriends then she needs to hold onto the gay one!

  35. Liana says:

    aw…if my gay boyfriend & i broke up i would be so sad
    *************************

    I know, me too. I mean, he’s not my best friend, that spot is forever taken in my heart, but he is my gay boyfriend.

  36. wunderkindt says:

    omg, never fight with your hair artiste.

    They know EVERYTHING!!!

  37. Aspie says:

    I want a gay boyfrend too, I’m jealous

  38. bisou says:

    lol… sorry… Eva Longoria isn’t very relevant in Latin America…

  39. Isa says:

    I am desperately seeking a Sassy Gay Friend! (Head over to youtube to check out the clips, they are funny!)
    I kind of wondered if she started to realize how bad he was letting her look and dumped him.

  40. GT says:

    I love how it looks like he’s grabbing her boob in the first pic, hilarious!!

  41. DiMi says:

    Let’s get real here: If Jessica Simpson is so stupid, then why has she created one of the most successful corporate empires of any media personality out there? As far as singers go, only Beyonce has outpaced her. A stupid person couldn’t achieve this level of success. Other singers and actresses are trying to copy Jessica Simpson’s business model. I don’t think they think she’s stupid. I think they think she’s rich.

    The dumb blonde thing is just an act. She’s a serious and seriously successful business woman.

    I think the “break up” with Ken is sad. Clearly her boyfriend wanted Ken out of the way. He’s isolating her, which is what all effective users do.

  42. ilibala says:

    “All she talks about is men, love and sex”
    Isn’t that what most BFFs talk about?

    Of course, if they are:
    1. in high school.
    2. in the below 110 IQ range.
    3. uneducated.

  43. Daisy says:

    Enough of the svengali crap already. Jessica needs to stop letting others control her and start using some self-control. She seems like a sweet girl but maybe a little too sweet for her own good. One more a-hole boyfriend and she will begin to get the picture. I would like to see her exercising in a healthy way and get her shape back into fighting form. She’s gotten lazy and self-indulgant, and it shows.

  44. t says:

    Jessica Simpson has not created a corporate empire. A few years ago, before
    she cemented her image as a tabloid joke, a guy named Vince Camuto bought the rights to her name. He peddles it to clothing manufacturers looking for advertising in the form of a celebrity brand name. She is an advertising expense to corporations…nothing more.

    She doesn’t have to be smart to be rich…just lucky. Lucky that this Vince Camuto and the clothing manufacturers haven’t figured out that if this stuff is really selling, it is in spite of her, not because of her.

  45. Liz says:

    Because they mention that she likes to drink margartias as a break-up treat means she has a drinking problem? If they said that she wanted to get together to drown her sorrows in some icecream, would she have a dairy problem? It does not seem that she is a down-and-out drunk.
    I used to love her singing, but I really think that fashion design is her calling. Her line is awesome, especially the shoes and bags!

  46. Lee says:

    “It’s a PR move,” says a Simpson source. “Ken’s launching his hair-care line in Latin American.”

    - As if just because Eva is of Mexican descent she’d be famous in 21 other Latin countries? I think not.

    But you beat me to it ;)

  47. Jamie says:

    Exactly. Well said, t. Jessica Simpson has never created a corporate empire.