Ricky Martin decided to come out of the closet when he became a father


Later today, Ricky Martin is the special guest on Oprah. It was a pre-taped interview, so clips from the show are already going around. Not so shockingly, Ricky is talking mainly about coming out of the closet and becoming a father. I think he’s probably also promoting his new book – a memoir called Me (I would have added an exclamation point: ME! By Ricky Martin). Some excerpts have already come out (here at Towleroad), and it seems like a lot of the book is about the same – bein’ gay and raisin’ babies. Did you know that Ricky is a single parent? For some reason, I thought that he had a long-time lover/partner who was co-parenting with him, but not so much:

In an interview airing Tuesday on The Oprah Winfrey Show, Ricky Martin opens up about his decision to come out.

“I couldn’t take it anymore, Oprah,” he says of being in the closet. “I couldn’t take it anymore. It was too painful. But I guess the most important thing is my children. You know, my children. When I was holding them in my arms, I was like, what am I gonna teach them – how to lie? Whoa, that is my blessing right there. And I said hold on a second. Before I decided to become a father, I already accepted who I was and I was happy with who I was. Then, when I was I was holding my children, I said, okay, it’s time to tell the world.”

The 38-year-old Martin — father to 2-year-old twin sons, Valentino and Matteo, via a surrogate — announced the news in an email last March. It read, “I am proud to say that I am a fortunate homosexual man.”

Asked how he felt when he hit the “send” button, Martin tells Winfrey, “I felt numb. Numb.”

Though he was scared, he says he also felt “relieved. But when I realized, okay, I just pressed send, whoo. And then I was alone. I was in my studio alone for a minute. My assistant walked in and I just started crying like a little baby. I started crying. And he [had to] hold me. He told me, please, he would grab me in the arms — in my arms. He goes, let it go. Let it go. Finally you’re free.”

Fatherhood has changed everything, he says. When he brought the babies home, Martin says he became “obsessed” with trying to do everything himself. That lasted “seven weeks …” he says. “Seven weeks [of] not sleeping. Seven weeks. And then I was alone. Two against one. It was, like, wait, wait.”

He says he feels “incredible” respect for his own mother and mothers of the world.

“It’s not easy,” Martin says of parenthood. “And apparently it gets harder.”

[From Us Weekly]

Ricky sounds really sweet here, and I think it will probably be a very good, weepy interview. Ricky wants to talk, he’s promoting his book, and he hasn’t given a big interview in America in a long time. It should be good television. I wonder if Oprah will really get into it about Ricky’s relationships? You know how much I love the homoerotic stories. I hope Ricky brings photos of his hot exes, but he probably won’t. So in my mind, I’ll have to go to the old stand-by: Daniel Craig. Think about Daniel and Ricky together… oh, yeah. That’s good stuff.



Photos courtesy of WENN. ‘Me’ book cover courtesy of Towleroad.

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21 Responses to “Ricky Martin decided to come out of the closet when he became a father”

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  1. sickofit says:

    i always get a creepy feeling everytime i see pics of him. and i believe this single parent thing not one minute. he must have someone working for him, like doing the laundry and cooking whatsoever.
    single parent my butt…

  2. Vee says:

    He is an incredibly beautiful man, inside and out. I wish his family health and happiness.
    @sickofit – I don’t doubt he has a cook, a housekeeper, I would if I could afford it. Playing and tending to kiddos all day and not having to worry about meals and a clean house would be ideal. I think he is likely an excellent father.

  3. Tess says:

    Reminds me a bit of Freddy Mercury on book jacket cover shot.

    Can those choppers in the last photo possibly be his own?

    And at the risk of all hell descending on me, I think kids benefit enormously when they are raised with 2 parents of complementary (read that as opposite) sex lovingly raising them. And yes, I understand that it cannot always happen that way and life is all about making the best of any situation.

  4. Johnny Depp's Girl says:

    Sounds like a dedicated parent…

    I was not surprised when he came out.. I had thought it was common knowledge..

  5. Vee says:

    @Tess – I agree and hell may descend upon both of us. I am the parent of two adopted kids and they have a great father and mother. We have strengths and weaknesses and we offer them different things. I’ll never forget Rosie O’Donnell, years ago talking about her son Parker and how sad he was that he did not have a father. She alone made that choice for him, selfish, yes, yet I’m sure he was raised in love. It’s not an easy subject, very controversial.

  6. devilgirl says:

    He was always out of the closet as far as I was concerned.

  7. Dorothy#1 says:

    Why do the gays get all the super hot ones??? 😉

  8. Ellen Smith says:

    Did anyone ever think he was straight? I’m not sure whether it’s important to proclaim one’s sexual identity to the world, but I doubt there was anyone out in the world at large who was shocked by his admission.

  9. aenflex says:

    gay, straight or otherwise – Martin is hot. P and S

  10. Samigirl says:

    @Ellen…as soon as he came out, I facebooked my bff Veronica, and told her she owed me $10 from 8th grade. My gaydar was going off on him way back then. It didn’t bother me, of course, though.
    Anywho, good for him 🙂
    He sounds like a great dad. Doing it alone with 1 child is hard enough, I can’t imagine 2…

  11. lee says:

    @Tess and Vee

    In an ideal world, a child does have two parents. but the gender of those parents really doesn’t make a difference as long as the child has strong relationships with adults of both genders in their lives elsewhere. recent longitudinal studies have actually shown that children raised by lesbian parents have higher self-esteem and are more well adjusted in adult life. the mother AND father stuff is propaganda as far as i’m concerned.

  12. Ferguson. says:

    This is from E! Online:

    “Martin arrived at Oprah’s studio fully ready to share some insights into his private life, revealing that he is currently in “a beautiful relationship” and admitting that he shared some passionate and genuine relationships with women in the past”.

    So YES, he is in relationship NOW. But started being a single father.

  13. Jeri says:

    He said the “doing everything himself” lasted about 7 weeks. I admire him for being honest about it all and about not being a super Dad all by himself, he doesn’t need to list his help.

  14. Ricky Martins is a great entertainer who undoubtably will be a great single dad. ” Sickofit” is just plain sick with jelousy. I can only hope that Ricky Martin and his family has agood and heathy life.

  15. REALIST says:

    My cousin was the sound engineer on his first album and I missed meeting RM by 15 minutes! No dish here but to say that my cousin thought that RM was a very nice guy and a joy to work with.

    Children do change your life and how you perceive everything. Being true to yourself is such an important example to set; besides, kids miss nothing-they know exactly what’s going on.

    I believe Ricky is a Buddhist-Shanti to you, Ricky, and hang in there. Enjoy the ride with your boys. Namaste

  16. xxodettexx says:

    i’m with lee

    as long as RM’s kids are nurtured emotionally, their nutrition/health needs met and they get an education, they are still better off than a huge percentage of the thousands of children stuck in our country’s foster system

  17. Henriette says:

    Didn’t ricky tell this story, already? I’m sure I heard the “I decided to come out when I had my sons” one from him, before. This is not news. But, in any case, I’m glad for him. I’m sure he’s an attentive, loving father.

  18. Anna says:

    @ Henriette: Ricky didn’t get enough attention lawst time; so he’s saying it again.

  19. Mika says:

    I’m with Lee, because I’ve also read that research. Children of lesbian couples (gay couples were not in the study, but I’m sure it’s coming) are extreamly well adjusted, and for the most part, very very happy. I know so many wonderful, loving gay men and women, I think it is terrible that some people think they are selfish to want children even when it’s clear that they will love and provide and do everything in their power for their children.

  20. Leah! says:

    Can’t say I’m surprised. I’ve always loved his superbly groomed eyebrows. Rawr!

    Two parents of the opposite sex would be ideal, but in a world where it is difficult to get even one loving parent, who cares?

  21. Praise St. Angie! says:

    thank you lee, and I’d just like to add…

    I wonder why a comment like that (not YOURS, the other one) shows up on a post about a single GAY parent, and not on a post about a single (teen) HETERO parent. And there was a post about one today.

    In fact, why not post a comment like that on ANY post about a person who’s a single parent and ISN’T gay?