On Tuesday night’s Glee, the writers gave Gwyneth Paltrow two Lindsay Lohan jokes. Paltrow’s substitute teacher is teaching Spanish, and in Spanish, she says “Lindsay Lohan is totally crazy right?” and “How many times has Lindsay Loha been to rehab?” Oh, and apparently the answer to that question was FIVE – not some “three” or “four” which Dina told Matt Lauer. Rather innocuous, honestly, especially considering how pretty much everyone who discusses the Lohans uses words like “insane” and “delusional” and “bitch” and “sociopath” and “crackhead”. Glee’s “jokes” were almost timid and quaint. Not to Dina! Yes, Dina spent the day on a spray tan-and-tequila bender, and she called up Gossip Cop to discuss her impending defamation lawsuit against Glee! Um… defamation what now?

Dina Loha is spitting mad at “Glee” after last night’s show featured a scene in which Gwyneth Paltrow, playing a substitute Spanish teacher, instructed her students in the language by asking them questions related to Lindsay Lohan.

In the scene, Paltrow’s character asks in Spanish (and translated via subtitles onscreen): “Lindsay Lohan is totally crazy, right?”

Then, in an effort (presumably) to teach the students the number 5, Paltrow’s character quizzes, “How many times has Lindsay Lohan been to rehab?”

And when the substitute teacher needs to talk privately with a student, she tells the class, “Please get into groups and discuss how many times Lindsay Lohan has been in rehab.”

Well, Dina Lohan is not letting this slide. She tells Gossip Cop, “Our lawyers are sending a letter” to “Glee” on the grounds that the show allegedly defamed the actress who, by all accounts, is working hard on her recovery.

A rep for Lohan adds, “Lindsay has an issue that millions of people around the world are dealing with yet ‘Glee’ is treating addiction as a laughing matter.”

[From Gossip Cop]

Bitch, addiction isn’t the only problem in the Family Crackhead. Your family is crazy. Delusional. Narcissistic pieces of crap, some would argue. Grifters. Cracked-out hustlers. It’s not like the joke was “Lindsay Lohan is crazy because she’s a crackhead.” No, the point is that Lindsay Lohan is crazy, full-stop. And not Britney Spears-style crazy, where there’s some kind of illness that can be diagnosed and medication to be prescribed. Lohan Crazy is just genetic crack hustle, compulsive delusion, incessant narcissism. And besides all that, we’re not laughing. It’s not a joke anymore. It’s just a sad, pathetic, trashy, epic, nasty train wreck.

Meanwhile – TMZ reported (before this Gossip Cop story) that Lindsay Lohan is starting to realize, in the cold, hard, sober light of day, that her mother is in fact a delusional crackhead. According to TMZ’s sources, Lindsay asked her mom not to do the Today Show interview last week, and Dina didn’t listen, and now Lindsay is “furious”. Lindsay is apparently “beginning to understand Dina’s antics are part of the reason she has so many problems.” Also, Lindsay has also come to grips with the idea that her dad isn’t quite as horrible as Dina claims, although I think a man who compulsively kicks women in the vagina is still pretty much a bastard who doesn’t belong anywhere near any person with a vagina. But good for Lindsay about the Dina stuff! That is progress. I wonder if Lindsay even knows about Dina’s latest crack hustle with Glee?