Sister Wives Honeymoon: Kody is a selfish doofus, Janelle breaks down

Spoilers for Sister Wives Honeymoon Special
I finally had the chance to watch the Sister Wives honeymoon special, which aired Sunday night. (Let me say before I get into this that TLC is extremely short sighted for not offering their shows on iTunes, not to mention Hulu.) Two things stuck out for me about this episode: Janelle, the analytic, thoughtful wife, finally got angry, broke down and cried, and husband Kody was extremely self-centered and egotistical for taking a full 11 day honeymoon to San Diego with his fourth wife, Robyn. The remaining three wives all got upset with this in their own way but ultimately came to terms with it, with Christine making an hilariously passive aggressive dig at Robyn.

Kody and Robyn’s goofy PDA
First we saw Kody’s trip to San Diego with Robyn cutting to footage of the rest of the family making a chaotic trip to the woods for a cookout. (Kody has 14 13 biological children from his first three wives along with 3 stepchildren from Robyn.) It was a big contrast, one made the more obvious by the goofy way that Kody was fawning all over Robyn in California. Robyn obviously loved it, and she’s as much of a doofus as Kody is. They seem perfect for each other that way, and while Robyn keeps claiming that she wants the other wives in her life as much as Kody, she’s still struggling to fit in and be more than Kody’s new piece. These two emphasized that the didn’t have sex before marriage, that God brought that together (under their belief system) and that they are now together forever.

Kody and Robyn were shown taking surfing lessons and visiting an animal reserve, where Kody marveled at all the animal species that were polygamous. When Kody and Robyn took a ride on a zip cord, he quipped “I’ve got four wives, nothing scares me but poverty

Wives are upset that Kody took an 11 day honeymoon
Back at home, the wives had a bunch of sessions on the couch that seemed more like therapy than typical reality show event-retelling. They all discussed how their individual honeymoons were just a few days with Kody instead of a week and a half, and Meri explained that “we struggle with the fact that [Robyn] gets a bigger better wedding or bigger better honeymoon.”

Janelle gets upset, ignores Kody’s calls
The most surprising part of this episode was the fact that Janelle cried on camera for the first time. She said that it wasn’t “logical” for her to be upset at Kody for taking such a long honeymoon, but that “It’s been an up and down week for me emotionally. In a lot of ways I perceive any time he spends with her as cutting into our time. It’s the fact that he’s focused somewhere else for 11 days, and on one particular person for 11 days. That’s frustrating me.”

Janelle and Kody are “best friends”
Janelle refused to accept Kody’s calls for three days, after which she spoke to him and he smoothed things over. There was a lot of coverage of Janelle and Kody’s relationship. They each said that they’re “best friends” more than romantic lovers. Kody and Janelle have six children together. When Janelle explained her relationship with Kody, there was a revealing exchange between the first three wives:

Kody: “What happens I think on some level is that she’s never been romantically inclined, but she sees something happen romantically and goes ‘I’m missing that‘”

Janelle: “To say that that’s why I was mad, I don’t think so. I don’t think it was because the relationships are different. I think it was more just me still coming to terms with ‘where do I still fit into the picture?‘”

Kody: “You’ve never been replaced. I’m not marrying another Janelle. You will always be my best friend.”

Janelle: “We really are ultimately best friends. We talk about everything and anything, and we talk for a long time.”

Christine: “Your relationship with Kody was always something I was jealous over, because I was never valued as an intellectual. We never, we still don’t talk for hours.”

Meri: “I see how he is with each of you guys, and you wish that you had that. It’s like the grass is always greener and it’s hard to see what’s special about you.”

Christine gets through it by calling Robyn “sad”
Meri was struggling with missing Kody during his absence, but she didn’t have as hard a time with it as either Janelle or Christine. Christine seemed to cope by implying that Robyn was somehow weak for needing Kody. It’s interesting that, unlike Janelle, she didn’t blame Kody for going away for so long and focused her anger on Robyn. Isn’t this like blaming the mistress for your husband straying?

Robyn – “After we got back from the honeymoon, Christine [was] on the phone shooting tears and said ‘Tell me you needed this.’

‘I did, I really needed this.'”

Christine explained to the other women. “11 days for her is necessary and once she said that, I was like ‘Oh, that’s sad.‘”

Then Janelle stepped in, again the thoughtful peacekeeper. “Kody is very good at doing what he thinks is best for us… He tailors what he does, it’s different for everybody what they need.”

Robyn explains why she loves Kody, Kody explains how he loves so many wives
The end of this episode involved some laughingly faux deep introspection between Kody and Robyn, and I was again struck by how alike these two are. Robyn explained why she loves Kody in terms of his other wives, and Kody claimed that loving more than one wife is like loving more than one child. Do you think Robyn is subtly putting the other women down here? I do – read what she said.

Robyn – “One of the biggest things that attracted me to Kody is his love for his wives. The fact that he saw value in each one of these girls, for different reasons, for who they were, for their strengths and their weaknesses, was like, I just drooled… I love to know that he’s loving his other wives because that means he’ll love me too.”

Kody – “To me, loving more than one wife is really not far from loving more than one child… I still have as much depth, love and affection for Meri, Janelle and Christine as I ever did.”

Then the show tried to tie a frayed ribbon on it with footage of some kind of family togetherness party with a cake with candles, and a quote from Meri about how being a polygamist is like having a baby.

Meri – “This plural lifestyle we’re living is synonymous, in a way, with a woman who decides to have a baby. She knows what is ahead of her. She knows that there’s pain involved, she knows that there’s discomfort involved, but at the end of it she has this beautiful blessing..”

They’ve got one guy who has been married to three wives for twenty years with 14 kids, 3 stepkids and a newer, younger wife coming into the picture. Maybe they can justify that by saying the pain is necessary for their religion, and I believe that as long as their kids are well cared for they have the right to live however they want to. However their reality is a lot clearer to the viewing audience than it seems to be to the people going through it.

The next season of Sister Wives will start airing in March, 2011. Kody Brown is currently under investigation by local police for felony bigamy.

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78 Responses to “Sister Wives Honeymoon: Kody is a selfish doofus, Janelle breaks down”

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  1. flourpot says:

    Centering your life around one person is such a bad idea. It’s not surprising this isn’t all daisies and cupcakes as it’s usually made out to be. Send these ladies a box of vibrators and a lifetime supply of batteries, stat.

  2. wonderful says:

    This show makes me physically ill and boiling mad – how you can sit through it is beyond me. Likening your wives to children? Very, VERY revealing, and very, VERRRRRRY sickening. I need to get off this post now…blood….pressure….rising……..

  3. Praise St. Angie! says:

    “She said that it wasn’t “logical” for her to be upset at Kody for taking such a long honeymoon”

    honey, NOTHING about your “marriage” is logical.

    “It’s the fact that he’s focused somewhere else for 11 days, and on particular person for 11 days. That’s frustrating me.””

    wow, that sounds like DUH DUH DUH…JEALOUSY. thought that wasn’t an issue with these ladies?

    I know, I know…it’s their life and they can live it how they want to, but it STILL skeeves me out.

  4. Bex says:

    Those poor women, to have such low self esteem that you’re willing to share your husband. The husband must be a total narcissist to believe that he is worth all those wives.
    He must also be consciously perpetuating the low self worth that those women have. All that talking for hours -‘yes darling, I know you’re upset that I’m getting a new wife but I deserve it because I’m so great and you, well you’re not romantically inclined’.

  5. Po says:

    Look, I don’t care what your religion is. Taking an 11 day honeymoon with one of your “wives” when the other two are at home caring for the kids is thoughtless. Wait, did I just try to point out what was thoughtless about people who seem to be devoid of any real thought? Sorry

  6. aenflex says:

    All of them pathetic, lonley folk. The women pretend to be satisfied with the attention (read: neediness) that Kody gives them. They pretend it’s enough. It aint, deep down, and they all 3 blondes know it. They apologize for bitching, but the bitching is the truth. Get these 3 girls drunk and they will sing. Kody a bastard who likes attention and likes to be the center of attention, and fuck.
    Robyn’s a fool, a piece like you said.
    I cannot feel bad for any of these people, just the kids.

  7. Kayleigh says:

    I like how they try to make him sound like he is some genius, balancing all of his partners. He’s really not, he’s just a very open cheater and they are just not too sharp. Ladies you don’t have to share one man… I’m pretty sure you could find one man who loves you, and you alone.

  8. Whatever says:

    Yeah, the equating women with children is insulting to the point of infuriating. There may be no physical abuse, but there seems to be emotional abuse and little real concern for the wives’ opinions or feelings. Not healthly at all, but maybe they’ll make enough bank from this show that a couple of the wives can afford to take off. At least then it wouldn’t be a total waste and little more than promoting an archaic, sexist belief system.

  9. crab says:

    I’m sorry but it’s just an excuse for him to cheat without secrecy.

  10. lexa says:

    Every time I read posts of this show/family I get angry as well. For all of you who have the same feelings, I can recommend reading about Mosuo Women. In their society, women have the saying in all matters. In fact, “Men play subservient sexual roles”.
    Some links:

    The links should serve as a kind of empowerement for women.

  11. Tuatara says:

    He has such an uneven relationship with these women. By that, I mean the power is stacked on his side.

    He is allowed to take on a new wife, but they are not permitted to take on a new man. In fact, the very thought of that was called “disgusting” by Kody.

    I really appreciate monogamy after watching this show.

  12. Moreaces says:

    I truely pity these women, if they feel this is the best they can do. Sad, sad, sad

  13. Jezi says:

    I can’t even watch not even one episode of this. It’s disturbing on so many levels. These women really need to go to therapy.

  14. Stronzilla says:

    14 biological children from his first three wives along with 3 stepchildren! And he spends 11 days on his honeymoon with his 4th wife? How long does he spend with his kids on vacation and where do they get to go? The children alone outnumber him, his latest victim and the weepy triumvirate on the couch.

    Hasn’t anyone copped on to the total absence of self-esteem in these women? They are all caring, nuturing and in some respects strong and yet he has made them totally co-dependent. None of them seem to believe that they deserve any better than the half-assed crap this narcissist is serving up. He has as much ‘depth’ as a mud puddle and this last one Robyn is a clinical case!

    Of course he had to take her on an 11 day honeymoon, the stakes are higher to rope in the new victims. He has to identify them, psyche them out, love bomb them and brainwash them before they get cast aside into the role of his ‘best friend’ and find themselves sitting on a couch next to 3 or 4 other women who have lost their youth, lost their looks, their sanity and probably any sense of independence they might have once had while they look at each other and think WTF?

    That 11 day honeymoon served two purposes; it devalued the wives he left at home while making the latest wife think she’s ‘special’. Robyn, take a good look at that couch, because that’s where you’re going to be sooner than you think.

  15. I Choose Me says:

    @Stronzilla. You summed up my thoughts exactly.

  16. blinkblue says:

    TLC hit the jackpot with this show. This is the best soap opera on tv right now and I think it will do really well in ratings. This greek drama, is fascinating to watch and the cameras came into their home at the perfect time with Robyn just joining the long term wives. It’s a satisfying cheap thrill to watch this bunch.

  17. Stubbylove says:

    Flourpot – priceless comment – love it. Let’s see, a guy who continuously marries new women after he impregnates the old ones…selfish?? NO! Say it ain’t so! Watch Discovery Channel or National Geographic Channel – you’ll see identical mating behavior in male apes – which is basically what he is.

  18. GirlyGIrl says:

    They should call this show “The Asshole Family”

    Kody just needs a serious facepunching…

  19. Iggles says:

    ITA with everything that was said here. This show points out why polygamy is disgusting. The emotional abuse required to keep it up is just plain wrong.

    I don’t understand poly relationships, but I have a heck of a lot more respect for triads than I do for “1 man/ multiple wives” combination. At least other non-monogamous folks are equal opportunity!

    It just isn’t right for them to settle for 1 piece of a partner while he can do whatever he wants!

  20. Jayna says:

    Let’s face it, he’s hotter for this new one than the old ones and wanted some time for a lot of sex with no schedule with her. And these women know it. But I don’t blame him in this show. All of these woman chose this lifestyle. They weren’t in a family and married off to him at a young age. So if the women chose it, they have to live with it. They don’t seem to be living with it too good these days. Jealous much. LOL

  21. Sarai says:

    I wonder how much of this is scripted, and if they just agree ahead of time to script in controversy for the sake of ratings. I’m not sure if TLC “hit the jackpot” or self created the jackpot, with the key ingredients it had on hand, like a huge jackass.

  22. Bodhi says:

    ITA with Strongzilla. I don’t think I can say anything better than you did!!

  23. original kate says:

    “I see how he is with each of you guys, and you wish that you had that. It’s like the grass is always greener and it’s hard to see what’s special about you.”

    of course it’s hard to see what’s special about you because he has special relationships with 3 other women! i think the intimacy factor dissipates when you start adding other people to the mix. they are consenting adults, but i feel bad for these women, they seem so unhappy. but maybe they would be unhappy in a one-on-one marriage, too; they all seem to have self-esteem issues.

    also, i really wish you hadn’t posted photos of kody shirtless.

  24. Johnny Depp's Girl says:

    *****cough, BULLSHIT, cough, wheezee****

    Someone gonna get shanked…. 4 women? oh yeah, someone gonna get shanked.

  25. Roxanne75 says:

    This is a great show, on so many levels. It makes you think and feel and it takes you to some other people’s lives like you have never been before. I got mad at first, defensive for the women, then I started to understand where they were coming from, imagining how it must be, trying to feel what they feel, then I would get mad, then understand…back and forth. Interesting is all I can say.

  26. juliana says:

    I just wonder what garbage TLC is going to come up with next.

    “Manson Family Stories”? “Leave it to Richard Ramirez”? “Live with Susan Smith”?

  27. Chickadees4me says:

    I loved the links lexa, wonder what the world would have been like if more cultures had this belief.

  28. RobN says:

    I’m a big fan of God. I’m not a big fan of people who use God to control and manipulate the behavior of others. There’s a reason why people like Kody choose women with no self-esteem and it’s simply that they’re easier to con.

  29. D says:

    I’m not a fan of Robyn. The other wives have grown on me. I don’t think they have low self esteem. They’ve been with this man for two decades. There’s a lot of history and love there. I think all would speak up for themselves and call Kody out. However, Kody has the schmooze factor where they are concerned and can always make nice. I don’t think he will be able to do this much longer where Robyn is concerned.

    My son walked in the room while I was watching the honeymoon episode. Kody & Robyn were back in town. The wives had gone shopping. Kody was not home. He pulls up to the house with one child in the car. My 6-year-old asked: “Who is watching the children?” EXACTLY! Not daddy.

    Minutes later Kody was in the house being a big hero having his kids bake a cake to celebrate a new beginning. This man makes me so angry. He tries to be all glorious and wonderful when in reality he’s contributing some income, a lot of sperm, has others around him to take care of his offspring, and gets to sleep with 4 different women all in the name of God.

    In one of the earlier episodes Janelle was up super early to go to work. Kody had time to stop by that (and each morning) to say goodbye yet it was okay for him to let Janelle’s oldest son feed and get the others ready for the day.

    Ugh! I wish the first three wives would leave him.

  30. Just a Poster says:

    I really wish they would ditch Kody and the new wifey have a show featuring the original 3 wives.

  31. Just a Poster says:


    But on a down note, you prolly gave them show ideas :/

  32. spinner says:

    Every single one of these women are masochists & they all just enable one another. UGH!!

  33. abbizmal says:

    The new piece won’t like it when a newer piece comes along, and one probably will someday. Is there a limit to how many wives they are allowed to have?

  34. bellaluna says:

    If I was into polygamy, you can bet your ass I’d have multiple husbands (if I was so inclined). What’s good for the doofus goose is good for the gander!!

    Robyn is ALMOST as irritating as Kody. They both need face punches, as far as I’m concerned. Robyn is how old? And she’s constantly crying. The other wives need to kick her ass.

  35. 4Real says:

    LOL@Juliana!! I was thinking the same thing! What’s next the “Pedi files!”

  36. Megan says:

    This family is just a drama-fest… I don’t know how they live their lives like this. They’re always so jealous of each other (which is perfectly normal… they’re sharing a man) so none of them ever get a minutes mental peace. They’re just always in this horrible state of jealousy. Why do they do it to themselves?

  37. LittleDeadGirl says:

    Great post “original kate”. I so agree, I think that’s one of the biggest problems in these relationships and his analogy that it’s just like loving children is not the same thing at all. What you share with your sexual partner should be special in my opinion.

    I also think Robyn totally insulted the other women and it made me laugh. “I love my husband because if he can love ugly stupid whores like you well than gosh he’s gonna really love me since I’m skinny and pretty and smart”. Tell me that’s not the subtext of her post. If I had been one of the other wives I’d have punched her in the face.

  38. gg says:

    I also saw this and the show gives me a stomachache and makes my blood pressure go up. I don’t think I can watch it again. Janelle’s heart is broken and it’s plain to see she’s been replaced by a young, skinny lady. The other two ladies are also about to have their turns and I predict that they will all eventually leave, because this is abusive, plain and simple.

    These women are quite obviously all hurting, and beating themselves up nonstop for having feelings! Sad, sad, sad, and not natural at all. In order to have a home they have to constantly rationalize and deny their own emotional needs. They’re literally supressing all their emotions for this self-centered ass.

    When Robyn says she “drooled” when she saw how Li’l Surfin Lord Fauntleroy cared so much about the other baby mamas. SAD! She is so very desperate for a man that she’s willing to settle for a honeymoon and not have a genuine one-on-one relationship.

    He is Rasputin as far as I’m concerned. A bit too enthusiastic that four women are hanging on his every word and action. And what infuriates me most is his little comment about humans being natural polygamists! In your dreams, idiot.

  39. Cletus says:

    I dunno, if I could pick out who I was gonna share my fella with, I probably would. I would move my friend Nix in, and when he got on my nerves I would send him over to her. Also, I would make her iron and empty the dishwasher because I hate that and she doesn’t mind. I would cook because Nix is a vegetarian and I will never put tofu in my mouth. We would make him change the oil in our cars. Birthdays would RULE because I would pick out a great present for him to give to Nix and she would make sure I NEVER got another screwdriver set from him. Polygamy could work, is all I’m saying…

  40. gg says:

    But Cletus, what if he pulled in two more chicks – you’re subordinated – how much fun would that be?

  41. Sarai says:

    My husband’s take on this show, after viewing a few minutes of Meri’s 20th anniversary, was “so this guy gets to “get away” and celebrate now four different birthdays, not including his own, and four different anniversaries a year, while the wives just wait their turn? And they’re OK with that? Really? Forget about one wife getting a few day longer honeymoon than the others, it’s Kody who is really raking it in. He gets to go away for all of them! They should be resentful of him, not each other.

  42. wonderful says:

    Cletus – it works on paper, but not within the realm of human emotion. Not even a little bit.

  43. skibunny says:

    He should hook up with a Bobbitt

  44. Cletus says:

    Um, right. I was kidding. Nix isn’t even into brunettes.

  45. Crash2GO2 says:

    They let this asshole have his cake and eat it too. All the women need to grow a pair and cut his off.

  46. Not shocked says:

    I hate this mockery of marriage and family. He married Robyn because he seemed like he was getting bored with the first 3, which I have grown to like. Robyn I can’t stand, she is as selfish as Kody. I believe that he has 13 bio kids and Robyns 3 stepchildren. Christine was induced on the 13th because it was his 13th child.

  47. original kate says:

    “Li’l Surfin Lord Fauntleroy”

    LMAO at gg!

  48. juliana says:

    @For real and Just a Poster:
    Thank you! I just feel that shows like this are a signal of the downfall of Western civilization.
    I have not watched one episode of this garbage; nor do I plan to. It makes a mockery out of marriage and society.

    And in the next few years, I DO fully expect to see a show on TLC, or similar network, about the struggles a pedophile or other sort of sex offender goes through in his/her life, and expecting the American public to sympathize with them.

  49. NYer says:

    What Stronzilla said.

  50. Willow says:

    I cannot believe this show is so upsetting to so many who read this site. Everyone is acting like polygamy a new concept when it’s been in practice for centuries and throughout many cultures. If these people CHOOSE this living arrangement, then why are we bashing them just because we don’t approve? (and I would never enter into such an arrangement myself, btw) Some people disagree with a homosexual arrangement, some disagree with having two mommies. We can’t just pick and choose these equal rights. I mean, what was Prop 8 all about? Don’t you want to see committed relationship chioces evolve?

    It’s not about YOUR or MY approval or their lifestyle (as long as there is no legal signs of abuse), it’s about the freedom of choice…good choice & sometimes bad choice. Where is our tolerance level?

  51. Kiska says:

    He gets the vacations, the sports car, the nurturing, the adoration, and the sex from this arrangement. In return the women get tidbits of attention from “dude.”
    When I first watched this I kept an open mind because I genuinely like the first 3 wives. However, they all seem to have to justify their feelings and label it as being selfish. That is completely ridiculous.
    Kody is completely lapping up the spotlight and has been very insensitive to his wives. For example, discussing with a doctor IVF treats for Meri while Christine is in full labor having their 6th child. Or announcing he picked out Robyn’s wedding dress.

  52. wonderful says:

    Of course, SOMEONE had to make the argument that polygamy is somehow comparable to homosexuality. Polygamy is a tool for suppressing and controlling women, particularly their sexualities, with the ultimate aim of acquiring as many offspring as possible. The women are often psychologically battered in order to believe they are consensually signing away their dignity, respect, and sexuality because god says women are disposable. Not the same as a fully consensual homosexual relationship based on the dictations of their biology.
    This is why I have such a problem with this show. This (actually not so) shiny-happy version of polygamy leads people to believe that this is somehow okay in society, and who are we to judge? When historically it has been nothing but detrimental to every society in which it has persisted, particularly in those that view women as having value above the family dog.

  53. ApostleJohn says:

    One of my first impressions of the series was that it was interesting on a psycho-sociological level, kind of like one of those first-year college hypotheticals: Take a fundamental institution like marriage and warp it in a specific but crucial way, leaving everything else (kids, jobs, speech, dress, home decor, etc.) looking ‘normal’. How might such a situation play itself out? Of course, all such simplistic exercises have inescapably fatal flaws, and this one has some whoppers. Not the least of which is how pathetically jealous these women increasingly show themselves to be.

    These people invited TLC cameras (and bucks!) into their lives to celebrate “God’s Wonderful Polygamy Plan,” and Kody says the love is multiplied, and Christine forbearingly sticks up for healthful marriage by saying at the beginning of the season how Kody “had better be having sex with his other wives,” and Meri introduced everybody, and they all are just helped so much by the other moms, etc., etc., yada, yada….

    And yet without exception the wives are eaten alive with jealousy. I mean, what kind of wasted picnic was that for the poor kids, with the moms all sitting around weepily bemoaning New Girl’s 11-day honeymoon? Or Christine consoling the other two with her snarky comment about Robyn’s “needing” the 11 days being “sad” (like their 11 days spent crying about it WASN’T?). Or the “loving” way that Sister Wife #3 called Sister Wife #4 flat-chested to her face in the dress shop? Or little passive-aggressive Robyn, knowing how petty the others are about such things, even agreeing to the 11 days, or having Kody pick the dress “but don’t tell the others,” or planning a bigger wedding than the other 3 combined?

    Otherwise-intelligent women freely enter into a relationship where they know they’re going to be sharing a husband’s time, energy, affections, etc., with an unknown yet increasing number of wives, and then have the nerve to hold a stopwatch on the old rooster, getting all exercised when he spends a few more moments’ attention on one of the other hens? Their problem is obviously not his time with “me,” but rather his time with “thee.” Or put another way, a woman in a normal marriage of about 20 years would probably be glad to get the old boy out of the house for a few days — it’s only the knowledge that he’s spending it with a “sister wife” that causes any angst.

    While I appreciate their honesty in not covering up these rather tiresome (and increasingly un-watchable) histrionics, what I resent most is their insistence on blaming this mess on God. If a Benevolent God is not the Author of confusion, or indeed of jealousy (both of which this pathetic display has in abundance), then He is most definitely NOT the Author of this (dare I say it?) “un-Godly” arrangement!

  54. gee_gee says:

    To me, polygamy is just another way of saying “I’m bored with you and I want a new piece. Oh, and can you women folk watch all these kids and clean up the house for me? Thanks.”

  55. Pro-Family says:

    Let’s all remember that anthropologists say that 85% of ancient societies were all polygamous. Monogamy across the western world is certainly not working to well. Families are broken up all over the place.

    This guy has not only been married to the same women for a long time but three women for a long time. A statistical anomaly some may say but the family is happy and well adjusted overall. I bet half of the folks commenting of this thread so negatively have been divorced. Don’t knock the marital system that has worked so well to produce stable families over most of human history.

    This is obviously a good family.

  56. Mikunda says:

    It’s so disgusting. To think that these people lead this kind of live. No words to describe how I feel about this.

  57. wonderful says:

    So you deduce that because you have read that anthropologists state 85% of ancient societies had at least some instances of polygamy, they must have been able to “produce stable families over most of human history”? That is a crazy assumption. Many ancient practices would be considered quite abusive by today’s standards, not to mention views of family and unions were wildly different to our own. You have a totally inaccurate view of history.

  58. Willow says:

    @ Wonderful…the argument isn’t that polygamy isn’t the same as homosexuality..but about the choice of relationships/marriage regardless of the orientation of it’s consenting participants or the number of consenting participants.
    Are you saying that homosexual relationships are void of head-games, abuse (mental & physical), and agony over issues of faith?
    Get back on track to the real point of who are you or I to judge consenting adults if they are not causing harm to themselves or others under the eyes of the law. If you hold bias against one group, then it will extend to another. You can’t fight for equal rights while denying others due to personal bias.

    That polygamy was widely accepted in past history is a fact. The reasons and outcomes were varied according to circumstance, usually to assure offspring related to lack of population or to maintain genetic traits of noble families (even tho we know about inbreeding now). Either way, Wonderful…present day has barbarian features as much as our history. Just please take a look at any bias you might hold & think if that were extended to a homosexual couple. The same arguments could be made about them…past history, egos, yada yada yada…but it is their right as humans to make choices and mistakes even. And, it is our responsibility to allow that for them, within the reason of the law. Again, you won’t find me in a shack with sister wives…but that’s me & my choice — which doesn’t extend to this family. I can only wish them well & hope they get their shit straightened out…much like I do for the average family daily.

  59. mia says:

    These wives are women who really like drama.
    And they seem to like woman drama more than man/woman drama.
    This isn’t a criticism but just an observation. The drama is what makes other women watch. Mama drama! hahaha

  60. Willow says:

    rofl…Mia, I love it. I am so going to write that phrase down “mama drama”…hee hee. And, I agree with you too. Attn seeking mama drama.

    I swear, Cele/bitchy commenters have to be the wittiest bunch of posters on any forum. TY all for helping me appear smart amongst my friends when I drop such phrases as Mia’s 😀

  61. Pro-Family says:

    No matter how you cut it, they are a great family! I believe most of you are watching specifically looking for what is wrong rather than what is right. There is a lot of right and a lot of good going on with this family.

    I am impressed with them.

    AND as far as my view of history is concerned…

    I am not so sure women truly have it better today. I think it is a burden rather than a blessing to push for “equality” with men. Apples are not equal to oranges but both are great.

    Divorce and broken families are far less common in polygamous families. The support structure for everyone’s needs to be met tends to be far better.

    All I am saying is that it is not a bad deal. Everyone has the opportunity to win. It is certainly not disgusting or sick. It may not be your personal preference based on your assumptions and understandings but it works for people. Many men, women, and their children are very happy in plural marriage.

  62. Wresa says:

    Loving all of the analyses in this thread! Ok, we might be armchair psychologists, but no one can deny that the jealousy is coming out more and more among the wives, and that is a serious reversal of the whole “we don’t get jealous” bs they were trying to sell at the beginning of the show.

  63. Pro-Family says:

    They are still women and sometimes they contradict themselves but if you go back and watch the show again. There is really very little drama for a show trying to squeeze out all the drama they can to keep people interested. Remember, we have four women involved here, drama would be present even without a man around. On shows like these the staff are constantly trying to stir up drama so the public will stay really interested in what would otherwise appear far too boring for TV. They are also striking the contrast of what will push the hot buttons of society.

    The whole Brown family is definitely affected by their immersion in a culture of monogamously restrained marriage and the societal support structure that has evolved around that unscriptural religious construct. Gee whiz, almost every modern love song ever written emphasizes a connection between exclusivity and “real love” between a man and a woman. The staff running the show seeks to capitalize on those incongruencies and the feelings they produce.

    Christian missionaries for years have caused all manner of havoc in polygamous cultures by seeking to force their marital restriction upon existing families. (Forbidding to marry like mentioned in 1 Tim. 4) Talk about jealousy, imagine coming in and actually forcing a man to choose one wife among many. Very destructive and very wrong! Especially when the scriptures don’t even remotely support their position but they are merely following the “traditions of men” passed on by the strikingly non-hebrew minded Roman Catholics.

  64. I am Legend says:

    “They’re just always in this horrible state of jealousy. Why do they do it to themselves?”

    Because they are told they will go to Hell if they don’t embrace Polygamy. Because they believe it’s their fault if the husband wants another wife. Because their family/social network will reject them and work to keep them from their children if they resist. This show puts a candy coating on the piece of shit that is polygamy.

  65. gg says:

    I think seeing these women with their pain explains exactly why this isn’t just “a bad choice” in some opinions — it’s clearly very harmful to the ladies and their families. If you watch the show you will see. If you won’t watch, and yet still think a gay marriage is anything like this, then you have no clue.

    I hope this show absolutely blows up, and the women all move out after realizing they’ve been in a dangerous fog and a ludicrous “church”. By the way, I don’t think they’ve ever showed them actually going to a church service – so why not (if that’s the case)? Ain’t they trying to push polygamy and its so-called benefits, proscribed by their little freaky church? This isn’t worshipping God, it’s worshipping the stud bull they’re married to.

    For the record, these polygamists are very opposed to freedom for homosexual marriage – which just proves they are drinkin some seriously fonky kool-ade.

  66. Willow says:

    @gg: What you have here is 3 baby-mommas (1 a legal wife) and a new girlfriend who all live together. Is that illegal?…well, the courts will soon rule on that. Take out the religious context (Mormon) and it’s not so unbelievable except the living together part, e.g. Swizzbeat & Keyes mama drama.
    You cannot order people’s morality or religiosity no matter what their sexual orientation…thus, that’s why I left it alone. I argue only on the rights of consenting adults to marry in the manner they please with the understanding of no legal harm.
    You know what the best part is…if you were ever asked to signature witness this mess, you could always write a big “hell to the no!” on the dotted line in kool-aid 🙂

  67. Pro-Family says:

    Polygamy is not a Mormon thing. A Google search will reveal that multiple Christian works have been published on the subject prior to the inception of Mormonism with a real surge around the time of the reformation. Of course, polygamy was very widely practiced in Israel from scriptural times to up until roughly 950 AD when Roman Catholic influence and pressure forced polygamy underground in Jewish circles.

    For women that really love to be feminine women polygamy is quite a nice arrangement that holds many benefits. I have found that in non-Mormon polygamous circles approximately 25% of the time the women are the ones encouraging the addition of wives to the family.

  68. bizzy says:

    in fairness, these women may have been socially/religiously conditioned to this ‘conservative’ crap, but i see exactly the same mess of jealousy, self-blame, and sheer stupidity going in liberal, agnostic, polyamorous households. i’m telling you, monogamy with actual fidelity is the easiest, cheapest, laziest way to have a happy home life.

  69. Shell says:

    Kody needs to change his name to Pimp-Daddy-Slim. He whores for the camera. Poor kids stuck in that situation. Can you imagine what kind of self esteem the girls(children) will have when they grow up. And what “ego-junkies”, the boys will be. No mention of what wonderful positive attributes he desires in a wife, other than being able to put up with the other wives and dote on him. Well, they all were able to do one thing.(At least in the beginning) Now, they sit back, expressing jealousy. For what?? Him?? Puleez! He looks like he fell out of an ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down and he is far from being intellecually inclined. Why do women do this to themselves and to their children. Are they really that crazy to think this is right?

  70. Anon says:

    Meri looked in such emotional pain when she said the ending piece, it was really sad. I think if Meri could keep the other 2 women and their kids in her life without Kody, she could find the courage to leave him.

  71. gg says:

    Willow, you’re right, I shouldn’t comment on their religiosity. But I personally do feel what they are doing and how they are blasting it into the ether for a TV show is against the law; though it’s up to the court and I think they’ll find a loop. But I don’t feel that Cody boning four women and having 13-plus kids (he wants more) has anything to do with some God mandate or choice. It’s about Cody, not God.

    I feel sorry for the ladies – I feel they are stuck in a cage/trap and don’t understand what the walls are made of, so they’ll never be free of their pain. They all need therapy, really bad.

  72. gg says:

    One thing that I really don’t get – why did Christine tell Robyn, “tell me that you needed this”, to which Robyn replied, “I really, really needed this” (of course she did, she’s desperate, and probably hasn’t had sex in ages, and got a nice vacay, of course she’s going to say she needed it!), and the way the question was put to her indicated that Christine would feel better if Robyn appreciated the honeymoon.

    And then Christine turns around and says it’s “sad” she said that? Robyn told her what she wanted to hear and she blasts her for it? That was evil.

  73. gg says:

    @ Pro-Family – Polygamy IS a Mormon thing, hon. Just because tribes in Israel did it doesn’t mean Joseph Smith didn’t teach it to the Mormons. Yes, they’ve updated since then, but Mormons have been synonymous with polygamy for quite awhile now.

  74. HakuraChii says:

    I agree with a lot that’s been said here.

    While I feel that consenting adults should always have the right to make their own decisions (be it polygamy or gay marriage), I don’t think the 3 wives feel that they have a ‘right’ to their negative feelings (because they constantly follow those comments by talking themselves into how ‘fortunate’ they are).

    The religious aspect of everything causes them to feel ashamed of feeling jealous or angry. And not only do they feel they’re failing their husband, but their children, and most importantly, *GOD*. That they have to have strength to live unselfishly. Which means they talk themselves out of the understanding that what they feel is *valid*, and what Kody is allowed to do is unfair.

    I agree with whomever mentioned that Robyn shouldn’t get too comfortable on her pedestal. I really believe that Kody is going to ‘upgrade’ to a younger (more ‘fertile’) wife every few years. He’s already shown that he feels there’s nothing wrong with doing so, regardless of how the other women feel about it. They deserve better than that, but sadly, I don’t think they’ll ever believe that.

  75. CB Rawks says:

    These women are miserable, and eating themselves up with insecurity and jealousy and pain. Wow, how do I sign up for this awesome lifestyle?

  76. Trippin says:

    A better show would be a woman with a bunch of husbands. Oh wait, there’s no such thing. They’re all idiots and shouldn’t even be on tv.

  77. Willow says:

    @ Trippin: I think you have the best ending to this whole commentary…lol!!! What woman in her right mind would want 3 husbands (or more)to provide for, alternate sex/dates, and procreate with to the extent of this family? Goodness, in view of Trippin’s comment, I hope Kody & his family offer us all education into what we want & absolutely would never consider.

  78. Sophie says:

    It is comparable to homosexuality though they are “coming out” and how they refer to it as their chosen lifestyle. Robyn says she doesn’t want her children and grandchildren oppressed. They say they are being so public to encourage other polygamists to live openly, that its nothing to be ashamed of. They say they don’t want to be persecuted and they’ve even thrown around the term “civil rights”.

    It would be interesting to see what they think about gay families since most of their arguments are the same. “We’re still a family, this is our lifestyle”. Based on their religious beliefs I’m assuming they’d he hypocritical.